Any other young moms to be on this board but me?

oliveoil95 · June 2015

I just turned 20 in April. Sometimes I feel really awkward and ashamed when I tell people I'm pregnant at such a young age. I barely have my life together and I'm having a baby and people judge me for it.

I'm always worried beyond belief that something's wrong with the baby. I just don't know what I'm doing and if everything's okay. I still worry about miscarriage and im 15 weeks. I even heard the heartbeat at 13 weeks 4 days. I just get scared of getting a fetal Doppler everytine I see one. But besides that I feel fine about pregnancy.

What have your guys experiences been like so far.

My due date is Novemeber 29.

VexyMommy · June 2015

Hey. I know there are others out there and I'm pretty sure the bump has a young mother's board. You may also find other young mothers on the First Time Moms board.

katmcgrath92 · June 2015

Had my first child when I was 19 (18 when I got pregnant).
Baby #2 is due November 15 and I will be 23 (22 now).
Do not carry that shame with you. It may not affect your child, but it will affect you (mentally) in the long run.
Feel free to message me if you need any advice. I have a soft spot for young mothers (considering I am one). Best of luck.

wedding crazed · June 2015

I'm 32 pregnant with #4 so can't relate on that front, but 20 doesn't seem so young. By old days standards that would have been old. You should have more energy for the kiddo and bounce back from the pregnancy quicker. Lots of perks I hear. No matter what age you are when you have that first baby your life forever changes. Try not to worry about your baby. I'm sure it's healthy. Those in between appointments are the worst.

crysgx · June 2015

Hi there! I'm 24 and a FTM, although I'm not quite the same age, I think it's fairly close. I just wanted to share that I have the same feelings about my age, I'll be 25 by November so that makes me feel a bit better. Basically, regardless if we are 20, 25, or 27 it's a common feeling and natural. You may feel you don't have your life together yet, but this will definitely put the fire under you to get you jump started. Might as well start the growing up process now and in 5 years you will see how much you have progressed and accomplished. Most would love to have everything in order before taking on parenting, but our lives don't always go as planned. Once you get into the grove of things and start settling into this new journey you'll realize it's all for the better. Goodluck!

SamanthaAshley820 · June 2015

I had my first when I was 18 and I'm 23 now. Will be 24 when this baby comes! Its really hard to be a young mom; but its a decision you have to make. I was not a good mom in the beginning...I was still interested in going out and hanging with friends giving my family my daughter to babysit. And that phase has definitely left...but I was judged for that and feel horrible for that. My best friend had her son at 19 and she has been a remarkable mom...always there stay at home with no social life since day one. (Not a good support system at all for her.)

You can be a great mom, or a not great mom no matter how old you are

my SIL had her first at 28 and she is one of THEE worst mothers I have ever personally met.
Its your decision dear

AshenSky · June 2015

I had my first 10 days before my 21st birthday. I didn't worry about much. There were no forums or blogs like there are today. I read my books, stayed informed through that and my doctors. I feel that the information on the internet today and everyone's opinions gets very heavy on the mind. It is beneficial, definitely. But, creates a lot of fear.
If you have a healthy pregnancy so far and have heard the heart beat, focus on that. Not your fear.
People will judge you on anything. Don't let them get to you. Your age does not indicate what type of mother you will be. Maturity does. I didn't have a support group, but I did watch my sister have her first at 18. (She is 7 years older than I am.) Maybe that is why I didn't think about what others said much.

Escheffler34 · June 2015

Hey! I'm 21 and a ftm. There is absolutely no reason to be ashamed that you're a young mommy! As long as you're willing and able to be the best mom you can be. I'm sure you will be an awesome mom. Feel free to message me if you need anything

VexyMommy · June 2015

AshenSky said:

I had my first 10 days before my 21st birthday. I didn't worry about much. There were no forums or blogs like there are today. I read my books, stayed informed through that and my doctors. I feel that the information on the internet today and everyone's opinions gets very heavy on the mind. It is beneficial, definitely. But, creates a lot of fear. If you have a healthy pregnancy so far and have heard the heart beat, focus on that. Not your fear. People will judge you on anything. Don't let them get to you. Your age does not indicate what type of mother you will be. Maturity does. I didn't have a support group, but I did watch my sister have her first at 18. (She is 7 years older than I am.) Maybe that is why I didn't think about what others said much.

I had my daughter 10 days before my 22 birthday.

And totally agree with you. You decide what type of mother you will be, not your age.

RaisingJulian · June 2015

I had my first when I was 17 (3 months before my 18th birthday) and now I'm 20 with my second. I get judged all the time. And sometimes older people made comments when I went out. Or even now. It used to hurt a lot and make me feel like a bad person. But now I don't care. People are rude. I am a great mother and love my children. I have been with the same man since I was 16 years old and he takes wonderful care of my family. Others will judge you. Don't let it hurt you. You love your family. Who cares what others say. As for being afraid. With my son I was so naive about all the bad things that can happen to him and now with this one being a bit older and more educated I get very afraid of losing the baby. I'm sure we all do. It's part of being a great mother!

oliarnmom1517 · June 2015

I'm 20 and pregnant with my first and I turned 20 in April as well.. Don't let people get to you and just do what you think is right and everybody has things they do differently and your not alone in this world.. Always remember that there is always somebody to support you even if they don't at first... I bet you will be a great mom!

oliveoil95 · June 2015

I really loved how you guys said your age won't define what kind of mom you are, but I will.

Finding out I was pregnant was shocking, I had no idea. I use to be a huge party girl. I literally had to change my whole lifestyle in a matter of 2 minutes. I've done it, but it hasn't been the easiest thing in the world.

mmk29 · June 2015

oliveoil95 said:
I really loved how you guys said your age won't define what kind of mom you are, but I will.

Finding out I was pregnant was shocking, I had no idea. I use to be a huge party girl. I literally had to change my whole lifestyle in a matter of 2 minutes. I've done it, but it hasn't been the easiest thing in the world.

Step one done then. Congrats on changing. You want to be a good mom, you'll be a good mom. There are difficulties involved at every age, as long as you're willing to beat them I wouldn't worry about what others think of you. Good luck and congrats on your baby.

WeirdAlice · June 2015

Ended up pregnant right after my 18th bday had her right before my 19th, and I will be 21 in 8 days 17 weeks pregnant with baby #2. Today I went in for a name change paper at the court house and the lady refused to give them to me because she believed I was younger than 18. When she found out I had been married divorced and was pregnant with baby #2 (by a different guy) she got really snotty and disrespectful with me all bc i look younger than 18.
Thank lord for state id's.
She straightened out as soon as I flashed it in her face.
Judgment will be with you everywhere over every big and little thing. It's hard trust me but when it bothers you (bc truth is it will) find someone you can trust to talk to and possibly even relate to.

For serious questions on your pregnancy I would ask your Dr and never result to the internet. Google has a way of giving false info and scaring the life outta you. It's good to relate with other moms and pregnant women, but keep In mind all our bodies are different and no pregnancy is exactly the same. Also books are not only a big help but they are also a great way to pass the time and get you excited.

kbonel · June 2015

Shoot I still feel young... I went to my first doctors appt in a sweat because I felt like I was a high schooler in trouble. I'm 28, I feel like we may all be feeling similar things no matter what the age.

angiesbump · June 2015

I'm 18 and currently pregnant with my first, he/she will be here a month after I turn 19. Luckily I've been done with school for about 2 years now and currently work full time and am going to college part time. I'm thankful to have my life somewhat together, as I have a steady job, my own place with my boyfriend of 6 years, pay all my own bills and still live comfortably. I'm pretty used to being judged by now since I dropped out of high school after my sophomore year and got my GED.. Everyone said it was the biggest mistake of my life and that I was going to waste away but here I am further ahead than all of my friends still living with their parents, working part time jobs and just now starting college. I've come to realize as long as I have confidence in myself and a drive, everything turns out just fine. I say getting rude comments by other people just gives you another reason to be the best damn mom you can be and prove them wrong.

becklee101 · June 2015

I'm pregnant with my first and I'm 19. I'll still be 19 when baby is born, due date is November 9th

cakebatter3 · June 2015

i'm 17 and pregnant. i was 16 when i found out.. yeah i feel awkward and ashamed sometimes too knowing that people are going to think my son/daughter is my sibling.

tayzav · June 2015

kbonel said:
Shoot I still feel young... I went to my first doctors appt in a sweat because I felt like I was a high schooler in trouble. I'm 28, I feel like we may all be feeling similar things no matter what the age.

I'm 28 too and you described exactly how I feel. It's like everyone around me has kids and yet once it happened to me I was like wait I still feel way too young for all this.

My mom had me at 16, needless to say my grandma is my go to, and my mom. I don't talk to my mom much, we just recently started only because of my younger brother. It's been 5 years since I spoke to her. I feel like it doesn't matter what age you are you choose to be the person you are every day, with or without children involved. Every one of us is going to have lots of changes, as long as you accept them and take care of that baby how he or she deserves, the best you know how, then you're doing it right. Age doesn't defy what kind of mother you'll be, you're choices and decisions afterward do. You ladies will all be fine.

cathy432 · June 2015

I'm 19 and 18 weeks pregnant. I'll be 20 when I give birth , due 11th November

taylorrhill · June 2015

I'm 19 and 18 weeks pregnant as well ^ i will be 20 when I have my baby girl due November 11th too!

don't be ashamed it's a blessing!

savm11 · June 2015

I'm 19 and 18 weeks pregnant with a baby boy! Due November 10th

kaleighfontenot · June 2015

I was 18 when I got pregnant the first time and 19 when my little boy was born, and now I will be 20 when my second gets here! I was feeling the same exact way you were and believe me as soon as you hold that little angel you've been growing all your doubts and worries will seem so silly. Motherhood really does come somewhat naturally so don't stress yourself out, it's bad for you and baby! Don't worry about those you feel are judging you, it is your life and your decisions and as long as you are happy with yourself and a good mother when your baby gets here that is all that matters! Best of luck to you momma

jscasher · June 2015

I'm 25 now, will be 26 when LO gets here. I still get told I should have waited (we had only been married 6 months before we found out) and that we should have spent more time together alone before adding kids in the mix. No matter what your age, people will always have an opinion about your pregnancy! Just do you and be the best mama you can be for your baby.

P. S. My best friend had hers at 20 and her second at 26. She's the most amazing mother I know. Her parents were so angry with her (ironically, they had her at 16 years old) but now they are obsessed with their grand babies. So if you're facing difficulties now with family, time usually heals things.

P. P. S. I'm due the 29th too! Due Date buddies!

emmybean123 · June 2015

That's ok! I'm 20 too (20 in February) and I understand what it feels like to not have your life together. When we found out we were like :S crap we like in a tiny studio flat. Since then everything is falling into place. We have bought a business (a very successful one) and it is going great, and we have saved half our deposit for a house. :-) we are buying a house that is currently being rented to someone else, but on the downside the current tenants don't move out until two weeks after my due date! So a few weeks in a studio flat it is!!!!

sophieaxx · June 2015

I was 16 with my first baby now 20 with this baby, I was always mature, I learnt how to balance. My little boy is like any happy child. Age doesn't mean a thing personally, I always got your life's ruined now, I proved everyone wrong, I just worked a bit harder, got a happy family, a house, car, good job and good friends. I wouldn't change anything, everyone was over the moon for us with this pregnancy, I don't get any bad comments now, if a stranger says your so young or something I reply I'm glad I get that little longer with my children in life and watch them grow and one day there family grow

AshenSky · June 2015

Hah! How crazy! Best birthday presents ever;)
ETA: @VexyMommy
Apparently my app doesn't like to quote!

Crestonbaby · June 2015

It can be a bit tough being a young mom. I was 15 when I had my son. I was still in high school hadn't been dating his dad for too long and bam we were parents! It was scary and we definitely got lots of stares and rude comments! Needless to say I'm now 25 my son is 10. He is just like any other 10 year old, although quite bright and had to skip a grade :P yes we were young, no we weren't prepared, but we have been married now for almost 10 years and expecting our second. I got my masters in psychology and now work as a psychologist and part time midwife

life was a little crazy for a while, but isn't it for every single parent with a newborn? But life is good now, no complaints here

Lillymay93 · June 2015

Your not too young! I'm 22 with my first. I'm actually old in my family for a first child. Most have their first at like 19. Besides the younger you are when your child is born the more years you can have together!

sadyy131 · June 2015

I'm 19 having my first

I come from an extremely strict household and all I've had is support. And the best part is my boyfriend is completely on board. You'd be so surprised how many women were pregnant young but decided to have abortions. I was deathly afraid to tell one of my aunts and a fmaily friend of ours because I thought they would judge me harshly (based on the type of people they are) and to my surprise they were extremely supportive. It turns out both of them had abortions during their college years that they deeply regretted and they were proud of me for sticking this through. Plus there are a lot of benefits to being a young mom. For one, your body bounces back quicker and your vagina will go back to its regular tightness with 6 months of delivery. You also get to love your child longer

Unknown · June 2015

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kcannon7511 · June 2015

Lol i feel even younger so i know exactly how you feel im 18 pregos with my first but ill be 19 by the time the little one pops out

Ill be18wks tomorrow. The timing obviously wasn't relevant but im trying to making the best of it...congrats tho!

ShotHotz · September 2015

I turned 20 in May, I was already pregnant a few weeks. Now around 21 weeks, yay for halfway! The dad is 21, and we aren't really together although he's being exclusive to me for the time being and being there with me for anything. He works (he changed jobs, a bit of a promotion), but I haven't since March-- I was working nightshift which was getting tough to balance after half a year.

I've actually been considering it a bit lucky to not be in a job in the beginning, because I've had severe nausea (went to the ER and was prescribed Diclectin) and I've been light-headed, I passed out for a second on Canada Day (really scared my mum).

I've been feeling baby movements since 19 weeks and luckily some of them were storng enough that the dad felt a bit too at 20 weeks!

My due date is January 13, 2016.

I hope that your pregnancy is going well and baby is healthy. Did you find out the gender? I hope you've gotten some peace of mind.

BlondeMomma92 · September 2015

Honestly I'll be 23 when my little girl is here, and I've had mixed reactions for example my twin brother has completely disowned me. Sucks for him that he doesn't want to get to know his niece but maybe he will come around to it. The babies father has completely all ties and communication with me. But I still have two jobs and a killer support system anyway! I feel that we determine how we will be-- and we shouldn't let negativity influence how we perceive ourselves

mrsgabus · September 2015

I was 18 when I got pregnant with My 1st son and had him when I was 20. I was young and didn't have a whole lot going for me but I had love, a great man and a future to look forward to. My grandparents said some pretty messed up things but By the time I had him they were overjoyed with their first great grandson. I didn't have this site back then or many friends that could understand. Its tough but you get through it

I was 24 when I had my second son and Im 28 with this one.

Also I look like a teenager on most days lol

urby87 · September 2015

mrsgabus said:

I was 18 when I got pregnant with My 1st son and had him when I was 20. I was young and didn't have a whole lot going for me but I had love, a great man and a future to look forward to. My grandparents said some pretty messed up things but By the time I had him they were overjoyed with their first great grandson. I didn't have this site back then or many friends that could understand. Its tough but you get through it

I was 24 when I had my second son and Im 28 with this one.

Also I look like a teenager on most days lol

You were pregnant for over a year?

oliveoil95 · September 2015

Well today I got a lot of piece of mind getting the results from my paternity test we got done. I can't wait to show the dad the results saying that he is the dad. Which I have been telling him from the beginning. I wonder how he's going to feel knowing that we could of had 1000 extra dollars for our baby if he just listened to me from the beginning. I've been sitting here trying to think about how I'm going to tell him. It's like a weird thing to bring up to someone.

Well now that he's going to know that the babys his he's going to have to tell him whole family. Like I had to with mine. The only person who knows I'm pregnant is his mom and because he stalled getting the test done I'm now 27 weeks 4 days pregnant. So he'll have to explain he's going to have a baby in a short time period. But that's all on him.

My family especially my brother has had a hard time that I'm pregnant and he likes to say nasty things to me. But it's grown on him. It just bothers me how he says he'll disown me if its
a girl. My mom also told me I'm only
Allowed to live at home a couple weeks after the birth. I literally have no where to go, I only have a part time job and she doesn't want me going back to school. So I don't know what I'm going to do.

PetitNightingale · September 2015

I am 22. I am possibly the world's most dysfunctional person emotionally but I tell myself this every day when I look in the mirror: you are kind, you are smart, you are important. I am terrified, absolutely terrified, that I will mess up my son the way my mother messed me up.

I don't have a boyfriend, my parents threw me out and the father of my baby would see me dead in the street before he acknowledged this child.

But I am learning, frankly, not to give a shit. The sacrifices a mother make begin before the baby is even born. Dignity, pride, reputation. In some cases this happens but so be it.

I want to be a good mum. And I'm going to fight like hell. And I sense that in you, I sense your love for your baby and if people don't like it fuck em'.

Head up. Chin high. You have nothing to be ashamed of. The ones who judge you should be ashamed.

shayshayshah · September 2015

savm11 said:
I'm 19 and 18 weeks pregnant with a baby boy! Due November 10th

You're 18 weeks and due November 10? Sorry just curious how that works out... I'm 31 weeks and due November 7 :S forgive my confusion

brianna91chavez · September 2015

shayshayshah said:

savm11 said:
I'm 19 and 18 weeks pregnant with a baby boy! Due November 10th
You're 18 weeks and due November 10? Sorry just curious how that works out... I'm 31 weeks and due November 7 :S forgive my confusion

It was June when she posted that.

I'm 23 and I like to think that I'm still young but this pregnancy has me feeling old. I'll be 24 a month after baby is born. There are moms that are older than us that are not great and there are moms that are younger that are good moms. Just do the best you can and always strive for better for you and your child! I'm glad you got the paternity test figured out and you're right, it's all on him and it's the choices that he made that he has to deal with now. Just try to focus on you and your LO and everything else will fall into place.

eilykylie · September 2015

I'm a young mom as well, and I think when becoming a young mom a tough skin has to be developed. Judgment in any case is inevitable. People will judge you for just being you and 1000 other things as well. I think it is important to know deep down that your a good mother, or are going to be the best mother you can be, and let all of the negative comments looks and reactions just brush off your shoulder. Being 29 weeks I have already experienced some judgement for just going to the doctors. I go to sit down and all the other pregnant women stare or when I went to get a ultrasound and I handed in my script and the women at the desk asked me if this was for my mother. I am young but not that young but with a extremely young face to begin with but I just felt offended, but I now realize Its only going to get worse when my son comes, but I'm not gonna let things like that get to me. I'm a single mom who lost almost half her family and got walked out on by the father of her child , I'm working, currently in school etc ..but I have no doubt in my mind that I'm going to accomplish everything I was going to accomplish in life(all my goals) with my son. It won't be easy but I know myself and while most ppl think a kid is gonna hold me back I have more ambition to achieve all my goals for not only me but now my son. All I'm trying to say is people are rude and judgmental in all situations, don't let them get to you. Age doesn't define what a good mother is there are good mothers of all ages and bad mothers of all ages as well, and Lastly it might not be easy but your success story will be greater and I promise it will be worth. So the comments of others who know nothing about you or the struggles you face should hold no value to you, people are easy to judge what they don't understand. (sorry if this was long)

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