Weekly Randoms 5/11-5/17

karaelaine1991 · May 2015

This was such a big hit last week when @hoodoll82 started it, I figured we needed a new one for this week! Post whatever you want to say that you don't feel is worth its own thread here

karaelaine1991 · May 2015

@amark11 I just wanted to give you a huge thank you for repeatedly recommending Ina May's Guide to Childbirth (baby brain is now making me second guess that it was you but I'm fairly sure it was!). Anyway, I finally picked it up at the library last week and started reading it on Saturday. It's making me feel so much better about delivery! Seriously, can't thank you enough for the recommendation

KaLikeAWind · May 2015

John Oliver on US Maternity Leave. It's about 10 minutes long, but full of John Oliver awesomeness, and SO related to us right now

https://www.rawstory.com/2015/05/john-oliver-on-paid-time-off-for-mothers-thanks-for-having-us-mom-now-get-the-fck-back-to-work/

ElRuby · May 2015

On the topic of maternity leave... I find US policies horrible ... And I get so irritated that nonpregnant people can get written out of work for "back pain" etc etc (trying to avoid a full rageful tirade about disability) but pregnant women have to work until they have some serious medical complication or a baby coming out... Grrrr

Sammy K · May 2015

I hate that short term disability is for 12 weeks unless you're pregnant. Then you only get 6 or 8 depending on delivery. I'm paying the same premium as someone who unexpectedly has a heart attack but I only get half the benefits? Total crap. I know I shouldn't complain because 6 weeks at 67% pay is better than nothing, but it still seems unfair.

virginiaunicorn11 · May 2015

karaelaine1991 said:
@amark11 I just wanted to give you a huge thank you for repeatedly recommending Ina May's Guide to Childbirth (baby brain is now making me second guess that it was you but I'm fairly sure it was!). Anyway, I finally picked it up at the library last week and started reading it on Saturday. It's making me feel so much better about delivery! Seriously, can't thank you enough for the recommendation

Oh good! I read it over Christmas break, and it drastically changed my view on labor, too. Also, I recently listened to an interview with Ina May Gaskin on the podcast series "The Longest Shortest Time" and also found her words here comforting: https://longestshortesttime.com/podcast-28-the-missing-chapter-to-ina-mays-guide/

The rest of the podcast series I really like, and really helped me prepare for the first year of having a baby (there is a great series with Dan Savage about sex after birth, and how unrealistic it is to think we can be back in the saddle in 6 weeks)... but I had to stop listening to the series for now. The hostess had a very difficult birth experience, and she mentions it in each podcast, which was messing with my head. Also, some of the episodes are a bit dark for a woman in her 9th month of pregnancy... but I look forward to listening to them all again once LO is born.

I am trying to delete my duplicate Symptoms thread, but having problems. So... "jinx"" :-)

ElRuby · May 2015

Sammy K said:
I hate that short term disability is for 12 weeks unless you're pregnant. Then you only get 6 or 8 depending on delivery. I'm paying the same premium as someone who unexpectedly has a heart attack but I only get half the benefits? Total crap. I know I shouldn't complain because 6 weeks at 67% pay is better than nothing, but it still seems unfair.

You should complain because it is total crap! I can get up to 6 months on my plan for just about anything (EXCEPT childbirth).

47923ang · May 2015

I have a serious mix of emotions right now! In most ways, I'm crazy excited to meet my babies in a month. In another way, I'm totally freaking out because I'll have 2 babies in a month! I'm not sure I can fathom how much my life is going to change. (FTM, in case you couldn't tell).

It seems like I've been pregnant for a long time now, but these last 2 months have gone FAST!

LaurenAnn0405 · May 2015

So far today, besides my regular aches and pains I'm feeling pretty good due to the fact that I found out when I was at my last dr appt that pre-registration at the hospital is all digital now so I don't have to fill out and send in the mountain of paper work that I did last time!

I also think that DH and I *finally* decided on a name for DS, but that could change by this afternoon haha....

Westypet · May 2015

Haven't experienced any leaking yet...

BUT, last night I swore I saw a little bead of milk coming out after my bath. Then I convinced myself that it was hair conditioner or shampoo. LOL.

JKTitus14 · May 2015

What I think is Braxton Hicks are happening all of the time! Someone please correct me if I am wrong, but the way I feel them mostly is along my right side, right front and then like a ball left of my belly button......Is this normal?

ElRuby · May 2015

Welch's ice bars are amazing... You all need to get them! I just bought 10 bags (irrational fear of not being able to find them again).

MixedCurlsXo · May 2015

mellymar said:
John Oliver on US Maternity Leave. It's about 10 minutes long, but full of John Oliver awesomeness, and SO related to us right now

https://www.rawstory.com/2015/05/john-oliver-on-paid-time-off-for-mothers-thanks-for-having-us-mom-now-get-the-fck-back-to-work/

That was seriously hilarious & effed up at the same time, thanks for posting the link!!

aliciac2008 · May 2015

My plan was to keep working until 40 weeks, but it's just so uncomfortable lately that I'm thinking about taking off at the end of this week (I'll be 38 weeks). I just can't decide! The money would be great, but I'm just so uncomfortable. And I want to thoroughly enjoy my last few days of just me and DH. I'm self employed and I have a substitute lined up to take over for me while I'm away, so it's definitely doable. I feel bad having my husband work so hard while I'm not doing anything.

Sorry, just needed to vent/complain.

HoosOnFirst · May 2015

DH just had a relative complain they didn't get a thank you note yet from the shower that was 3 weeks ago. I kinda feel like that's rude. We are working through the list and we are not ungrateful, we are swamped! It pissed me off that someone would mention it - even if they are thinking it. For weddings you get a year - I assumed for a shower we'd get a month leeway! Also hope I don't get flamed for this lol. We appreciate everything we received but it just rubbed me the wrong way - my emotions are a liiiiitttle high right now!

upandbelow · May 2015

hoodoll82 said:
DH just had a relative complain they didn't get a thank you note yet from the shower that was 3 weeks ago. I kinda feel like that's rude. We are working through the list and we are not ungrateful, we are swamped! It pissed me off that someone would mention it - even if they are thinking it. For weddings you get a year - I assumed for a shower we'd get a month leeway! Also hope I don't get flamed for this lol. We appreciate everything we received but it just rubbed me the wrong way - my emotions are a liiiiitttle high right now!

No flame coming at you from me! I haven't done mine yet and my shower was awhile ago. I've been feeling guilty because I haven't done my thank-you cards yet...but we mostly got clothes at the shower so my thank-you card approach is to send a pic of LO in the clothes that we got to each of the guests. I made sure to let my guests know how thankful I was and that this was my plan...they seemed fine.

hswan26 · May 2015

My random is that I'm actually looking forward to my 36 week appointment tomorrow because they are going to start doing the internals and frankly I'm so over being pregnant I'm hoping that there is news of some kind of process. My back is killing me and I get zero sleep anymore so I want this baby out!

Frogger5 · May 2015

hoodoll82 said:
DH just had a relative complain they didn't get a thank you note yet from the shower that was 3 weeks ago. I kinda feel like that's rude. We are working through the list and we are not ungrateful, we are swamped! It pissed me off that someone would mention it - even if they are thinking it. For weddings you get a year - I assumed for a shower we'd get a month leeway! Also hope I don't get flamed for this lol. We appreciate everything we received but it just rubbed me the wrong way - my emotions are a liiiiitttle high right now!

No, that's crazy. It's not like that person didn't know if you received the present in the mail. I think the sooner the better, but certainly it's not ok for anyone to say anything! Even if he or she thinks you're being rude (which I'm sure you aren't), they are, too!

klkonwi · May 2015

@hswan26 I'm right there with you..... Get. Baby. Out.

KaLikeAWind · May 2015

We installed our car seat base today in our car, and were wondering where we should keep the actual seat until we need it. So we just decided to keep the seat in the base. I mean, why not? Then I remembered the stories of people getting the cops called on them for leaving their kids in the car for 5 minutes, and imagined coming out of the store or somewhere to find a nosy busybody who had called the cops waiting for me cause they can see the carseat in the vehicle. We drive a Honda Element, so the rear windows are factory dark, and it's kinda hard to see that there is no child in the seat (you CAN see, but you gotta get right up on the glass and peer in). But from the front you can see thru the clear glass that there is, indeed, a car seat there. So we debated taking the carseat out of the base and bringing it inside. And finally just left it. If some nosybody wants to to call the cops they'll look like a damned fool.

Frogger5 · May 2015

This definitely is random (and a gentle vent):

Breath and breathe are two different words. They are spelled differently, have different meanings, and are pronounced differently. If you aren't a native English speaker of course you get a pass, but otherwise - come on, guys.

jesscmv · May 2015

mellymar said:
We installed our car seat base today in our car, and were wondering where we should keep the actual seat until we need it. So we just decided to keep the seat in the base. I mean, why not? Then I remembered the stories of people getting the cops called on them for leaving their kids in the car for 5 minutes, and imagined coming out of the store or somewhere to find a nosy busybody who had called the cops waiting for me cause they can see the carseat in the vehicle. We drive a Honda Element, so the rear windows are factory dark, and it's kinda hard to see that there is no child in the seat (you CAN see, but you gotta get right up on the glass and peer in). But from the front you can see thru the clear glass that there is, indeed, a car seat there. So we debated taking the carseat out of the base and bringing it inside. And finally just left it. If some nosybody wants to to call the cops they'll look like a damned fool.

Oh no I didn't even think of that! We've had our seats in the car for like 2 weeks.

Serenamarr · May 2015

Random related to a post on the gripes thread about fur baby health. Got my pup's test results back for heartworm/lymes/ehrlichea and he is clean! :o3 Not that there were any doubts as he's on year round preventatives, but after the terrible story shared on the gripes thread I am glad to know for sure. Now just have to bring him in for a spa day next week (groom, nail trim, etc) and he will be 100% ready to meet his baby brother!

virginiaunicorn11 · May 2015

I stare at the torsos of women who have babies (in the same way most people gape at my big belly now). They look so skinny, it fascinates me! And their ribs are closed and in the right place. Seriously. I act like I've never seen a non-pregnant lady before.

klkonwi · May 2015

@amark11 I love that you said this. I'm feeling day by day like my body will never go back to normal/look normal or the pain will never stop..... But the reality is things will probably go back to semi normal and the baby will come out ! I have zero patience.

karaelaine1991 · May 2015

mellymar said:
We installed our car seat base today in our car, and were wondering where we should keep the actual seat until we need it. So we just decided to keep the seat in the base. I mean, why not? Then I remembered the stories of people getting the cops called on them for leaving their kids in the car for 5 minutes, and imagined coming out of the store or somewhere to find a nosy busybody who had called the cops waiting for me cause they can see the carseat in the vehicle. We drive a Honda Element, so the rear windows are factory dark, and it's kinda hard to see that there is no child in the seat (you CAN see, but you gotta get right up on the glass and peer in). But from the front you can see thru the clear glass that there is, indeed, a car seat there. So we debated taking the carseat out of the base and bringing it inside. And finally just left it. If some nosybody wants to to call the cops they'll look like a damned fool.

I've had mine in for like a month and have had no problems so far... our windows aren't super tinted though. But you're right, if some busybody decided to call the cops, they're the ones who'd end up looking bad, not you! Hopefully you just won't have to deal with it.

dancegurl1118 · May 2015

I love John Oliver. I watch that show every week. When I saw it was covering family leave I turned to my husband and said OH SHIT I'M ABOUT TO GET ALL RILED UP. And then I actually was close to tears while watching it thinking how fucking terrible it's going to be to go back to work (after stressing about being unpaid for 10 of my 16 weeks). It just sucks...

devyns2nd · May 2015

So, my brother is expecting twins In August and my moms not so excited (probably afraid she will be asked to babysit) Recently they have received terrible news about the health of both babies. One has been diagnosed with trisomy 18 or Edwards syndrome. she only has a 15% chance of surviving more than a few days after birth. Baby B may have severe down sydrom. They can't say 100% but the Dr is pretty convinced and it's hard to say but it's almost a relief that baby B only has down syndrome. I'm torn because baby A will most likely pass soon or soon after birth and how do you show sympathy and grieve for/with your brother all at the same time. I can't imagine how I can begin to comfort him and my moms first words of advice were to ask if he's thought about adoption because "down syndrome is rough". I'm so shocked with her reaction that I don't know how to keep from hurting her. I can't even be in the same room as her right now.

That's my rant/vent and my random question (or need of advice) is what should I do about their baby shower?? I don't want to be insensitive and I defiantly don't want to hurt my SILs feelings by buying matching or non matching outfits. my brother wants to proceed as planned and not focus on what could go wrong and just destract her from her worry. I'm just so afraid of over thinking the gift and upsetting her.

klkonwi · May 2015

@devyns2nd that is an awful situation. I'm so sorry for your family. I would personally just have dialogue with your SIL about the shower. Are you throwing it?

If your not throwing it and they choose to have one I would not buy outfits period. Avoid that. Give a practical gift/diaper cake or whatever gift you give make sure the receipt is available to them.

This is one of those situations where if you are close to them the most you can help them is emotionally..... Kind words and acknowledgement of the possible situation. In my experience ppl going through shit like ppl to acknowledge their pain.

jesscmv · May 2015

klkonwi said:
@amark11 I love that you said this. I'm feeling day by day like my body will never go back to normal/look normal or the pain will never stop..... But the reality is things will probably go back to semi normal and the baby will come out ! I have zero patience.

My husband told me that my pregnant body is becoming "normal" to him.......no DH don't ever say that agian!

MaliKaela · May 2015

devyns2nd said:
So, my brother is expecting twins In August and my moms not so excited (probably afraid she will be asked to babysit) Recently they have received terrible news about the health of both babies. One has been diagnosed with trisomy 18 or Edwards syndrome. she only has a 15% chance of surviving more than a few days after birth. Baby B may have severe down sydrom. They can't say 100% but the Dr is pretty convinced and it's hard to say but it's almost a relief that baby B only has down syndrome. I'm torn because baby A will most likely pass soon or soon after birth and how do you show sympathy and grieve for/with your brother all at the same time. I can't imagine how I can begin to comfort him and my moms first words of advice were to ask if he's thought about adoption because "down syndrome is rough". I'm so shocked with her reaction that I don't know how to keep from hurting her. I can't even be in the same room as her right now.

That's my rant/vent and my random question (or need of advice) is what should I do about their baby shower?? I don't want to be insensitive and I defiantly don't want to hurt my SILs feelings by buying matching or non matching outfits. my brother wants to proceed as planned and not focus on what could go wrong and just destract her from her worry. I'm just so afraid of over thinking the gift and upsetting her.

Yikes. That is so so sad. Oh, i'm just so sorry to hear this. I can't think of any advice - I wish I could. But I wish all of you the best of luck.

KaLikeAWind · May 2015

@devyns2nd ooohh

This is a very sad situation. My heart goes out to you and your brother and his family. I agree with @klkonwi, a practical gift would be better than clothes, I think. But support and being available to talk will probably be the best. Especially since his lady is probably feeling like she can't talk to anyone cause everyone always tries to avoid unpleasant subjects, and she may be especially afraid to bring it up around you, with you being pregnant also (a 'too close to home' situation). Best wishes to you all ❤

aliciac2008 · May 2015

I have a deep soaking tub. I hadn't taken a bath in a few weeks, but tonight I noticed I can no longer get the water to cover my belly. Sad day

klkonwi · May 2015

I just had a thought. Bladder torture should be a thing the FBI uses to get terrorists to talk.... Some type of shock/pinch that makes them feel like constantly urinating but a teaspoon comes out .... And then it feels like their man parts are being shocked and going to fall off.....
Nah. I'm never overdramatic.

virginiaunicorn11 · May 2015

I am officially freaking out. I am like two people - one is going mental, and one is watching in fascination, knowing everything is fine, but can't calm homegirl down. (I am exaggerating a bit, but did cry a lot last night. To be fair, there is drama with my job offer and insurance, three weeks before due date.)
Husband thinks reading these boards works me up. I don't think so, but am gonna take a 24-48 hour break to see.

Hope you all have a really good day or two! Xo

aliciac2008 · May 2015

It is midnight and I just came downstairs for a snack and to use the bathroom. The dishwasher was somehow running! DH and I went to bed over 2 hours ago and didn't even touch the dishwasher before bed, so I have no idea how it turned on. Needless to say, pretty spooked over here. And I can't wake my husband up to comfort me or investigate since he has to get up at 3am for work. I have a feeling I'm gonna have a hard time getting to sleep tonight.

aj1327 · May 2015

@devyns2nd I'm so sorry for your family. You all will be in my thoughts.

HoosOnFirst · May 2015

klkonwi said:
I just had a thought. Bladder torture should be a thing the FBI uses to get terrorists to talk.... Some type of shock/pinch that makes them feel like constantly urinating but a teaspoon comes out .... And then it feels like their man parts are being shocked and going to fall off.....
Nah. I'm never overdramatic.

This occurred to me as my joints are all loosening apart. Is that how they tortured people in the olden days? Stretched them until their joints came apart? Pretty sure that's what "the rack" did...

klkonwi · May 2015

This is so random. I'm in love with these shoes..... I can't get over it. I don't wear toms myself but...

mjschenk · May 2015

It's been awhile since we did a ticker change or whatever they were called but I feel like we have enough thread options so I will put it here. I am 36 weeks as of today and my very DH finally last night inadvertently mentioned for the first time that he was nervous. I don't know if it was the holding his brothers brand new baby that made it seem real or the fact that I am freaking out a little that is now under a month. I am glad DH has been so calm my whole pregnancy but I am secretly glad he is a little nervous I was feeling sick of being the only nervous one.

MrsWiggleWaggle · May 2015

so, I just spent the last 15 minutes but naked trying to fish my Roomba out from under my bed. I was to tired to get dressed after my bath and to desperate to NOT vacuum my own carpets. I feel like such a hot mess.

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