overwhelmed new mom of twin girls

alcover · April 2015

hello I am new to this message board and heard about it from a friend with older Twins. I have 2 week 5 day old twin girls that were born at 37 weeks 5 days. No NICU time and are pretty healthy from what have been told. One was 5 pounds 8 onces and other 4 pounds 11 ounces. both are now above their Birth weight and are eating every 3 hour. We just stared introducing them to their cribs at night 5 days ago and the first night went great! We fed them every three hours laid them back down and they slept till the next Feeding. But over the nights it's been steadily getting worse. I have one that will never fall into a good sleep she is constantly awake and wants to be held Or have the pacifier in her mouth. even now during the day she will not sleep unless she is in my arms with a pacifier. I am so tired and overwhelmed and my husband is back at work so it's been hard on him as well. I don't know if I'm looking for advise or just reassurance that this will eventually pass. I know since they are so young they are not trying to make me mad but are just adjusting to this new world outside of me but it's getting hard because I can't sleep.... they won't let me lol! I am trying to get them on a schedule and we do feed them every three hours even if it's hard to wake them up. but done ranting now

thanks in advance for any advise or encouragement

KathrynShustek · April 2015

Hello There,

I am have twin girls that just turned 5 months on Saturday. Your explanation of your days and nights sounds so familiar. I really feel for you. It is hard enough to have one baby that wants to be held all the time, let alone two. Here are a couple pieces of advice I have for you.

1. Yes this phase will end, I remember thinking that my babies would never sleep outside my arms, well they do now and its getting easier and easier to put them down for naps and such

2. Our girls had a real problem with their cribs so we transferred them to rock 'n' plays and it helped A LOT. However now I am nervous about transitioning them back to cribs and they are getting too big for them. So I can't speak to if that is the best solution but it helped me not totally lose my mind at the time

3. I wrecked myself trying to get my girls on a schedule. And looking back that stress was totally not worth it. I would suggest getting into a routine not a schedule. Here's what I mean by that. Feed both at the same time, even if that means waking the other. I know its heart breaking waking a sleeping baby but for your sanity its the only way to do it. This will get them on relatively the same timeline. Now If I dont purposefully wake the other up they usually wake within 15 min of each other. And then know they will need to eat 2-3 hrs after that feeding. I spent so much of my maternity leave trying to get them to nap at the exact same time of every day and eat and wake and yadda yadda. I stressed myself out for nothing. If I had just enjoyed my time I think it would have been much better.

4. Everyting is a phase and will pass. I am trying to tell myself that now with this awful sleep regression.

Let me know if you have any other questions, I more than willing to help. Twins is the real deal. You can do this mama!

vpine · May 2015

I have twin girls that are 11 weeks - the first 7 weeks were extremely hard. It DOES get better. My daughters slept 2-3 hours at first and when one would sleep and I thought I would rest, the other would wake up. I tried separating them in rooms (didn't work), tried sleeping them right next to each other (didn't work) and finally got it - they like to be in same room, separate cribs. One will only sleep long stretches (now she sleeps 7-8 hrs straight at night) when swaddled, the other loves to sleep already so I don't need to swaddle her. I have 2 night lights on in their room and waterfall music playing all night. I think it will get better for you too once more weeks pass by and you figure out what works for them.

britini90 · May 2015

My heart goes out to you. I have seven month old twin boys. And like others have said it will pass. There is a few things you can try, idk if you have ever heard of halos or if you have any but it was the best thing we did. They are like wearable blankets they help to make them feel secure my boys were sleeping 8 hours thru the night at 4 months because of them. They are awesome sleepes now. Also I know for my boys they were tough burpers and had gas issues so we got gas drops helped a ton. O and the last thing we did was let them sleep in rockers so they werent laying flat. But transition them back to a crib when u feel they r ready. I waited to late because I had a hard time letting go and they didnt want the cribs.

CaliCarly77 · May 2015

IT WILL PASS!!! I was in your shoes at about the exact same time.

At 3 weeks, they will start to lengthen the time between feedings.

At 12 weeks, they start getting melatonin and will start sleeping longer in the night.

We live and die by our "routine" and have fed the girls at 8, 11, 2, 5 and 8 every day from 10 weeks to age 1, and they slept from 8 pm to 8 a.m. every day and still do - with only about 5 middle of the night wake ups EVER in over a year.

Stick to your plan. You are doing awesome! Just give them a little bit of time while they are so little! Don't stress about it until they are 10 weeks old, for now you have to baby them.

Get some help!!!!!!!!!!

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