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July 2015 Moms
nickse44
member
Vent- monster in law! Long post..
nickse44
member
So, my mother in law has always been difficult and there has always been as bit of tension between us. There is tension between her and just about everyone, so while my hubby understands why I have issues with a lot of the things she does and says to me/us...he always asks me to be the bigger person bc at the end of the day she is his mom...ok- I get it.
For my bridal shower- she did nothing and just told me "I'll do it with your mom, let me know how much I owe her"...then did nothing and said 15 people from her family were coming (who never rsvp'd) and only 5 including her showed up.
So fast forward to my pregnancy, and she has been rude/innaprioriate several times including telling me at multiple points in a room full of people how HUGE I am...(ps- I'm very fit and healthy and not huge at all..) anyway..
So, when it came time to talk about baby showers I discussed with my husband first and he agreed maybe doing them separate would be best. Because, when she said she had 15 people coming to my bridal shower I didn't invite some of my friends bc It was already going to be huge- and then they didnt even show up.
When she asked me when my mom was having my shower I told her I thought separate showers would be easier, and told her that if she didn't want to have a shower and just wanted to come to the one my mom was having that I was perfectly ok with that. She said she'd have one.
She complained later that it was rude that I registered at target and babies r us bc they are both an hour drive (we live in rural Wisconsin) and that I should have registered at the only store in town (we don't even live in the same town..) Kmart. My mom was there when she made that comment and suggested maybe a gift card or money would be a nice gift option and then my MIL went on to say that it is just a lot of me to expect people to drive an hour AND Buy a gift.....ok, it feels like this is such an inconvenience!
So she sends out my shower invites and I ask her if she would mind inviting my mom to her shower- and I see the invite at my parents house last week.....
What: (last name) shower
Where: my house
Date/time: Sunday May 3 1130
RSVP: to Terri
......doesn't put where we are registered, doesn't put "it's a girl", actually doesn't even put that it's a baby shower, and can't put my name or my hubby's name on it!?!? Uhhhhh
Wish me luck on Sunday!!! I'm so glad my mom will be there to keep me sane!
For my bridal shower- she did nothing and just told me "I'll do it with your mom, let me know how much I owe her"...then did nothing and said 15 people from her family were coming (who never rsvp'd) and only 5 including her showed up.
So fast forward to my pregnancy, and she has been rude/innaprioriate several times including telling me at multiple points in a room full of people how HUGE I am...(ps- I'm very fit and healthy and not huge at all..) anyway..
So, when it came time to talk about baby showers I discussed with my husband first and he agreed maybe doing them separate would be best. Because, when she said she had 15 people coming to my bridal shower I didn't invite some of my friends bc It was already going to be huge- and then they didnt even show up.
When she asked me when my mom was having my shower I told her I thought separate showers would be easier, and told her that if she didn't want to have a shower and just wanted to come to the one my mom was having that I was perfectly ok with that. She said she'd have one.
She complained later that it was rude that I registered at target and babies r us bc they are both an hour drive (we live in rural Wisconsin) and that I should have registered at the only store in town (we don't even live in the same town..) Kmart. My mom was there when she made that comment and suggested maybe a gift card or money would be a nice gift option and then my MIL went on to say that it is just a lot of me to expect people to drive an hour AND Buy a gift.....ok, it feels like this is such an inconvenience!
So she sends out my shower invites and I ask her if she would mind inviting my mom to her shower- and I see the invite at my parents house last week.....
What: (last name) shower
Where: my house
Date/time: Sunday May 3 1130
RSVP: to Terri
......doesn't put where we are registered, doesn't put "it's a girl", actually doesn't even put that it's a baby shower, and can't put my name or my hubby's name on it!?!? Uhhhhh
Wish me luck on Sunday!!! I'm so glad my mom will be there to keep me sane!
Re: Vent- monster in law! Long post..
It does sound like your MIL is a little saltier so I can understand your frustrations. I try to think of it this way though: try not to stress about "possible scenerios." I know she isn't nice and it was not cool of her to not mention your registry BUT don't have a predetermined idea of how the party will go because guaranteed if you set yourself up to be angry....you will probably find a reason to get mad. Instead think of funny things to say and creative ways to make the party more enjoyable. It may sound trite, but I've been married for almost 15 years and understand that sometimes we just have to bite the bullet and push on. Family can definitely suck, Bute we don't have to let them dictate our happiness. Good luck with your shower.