baby shower or no?

Karrieschofield · April 2015

This is hopefully going to be my 3rd bany. I missed my first baby shower giving birth to my son. 5 years later I had my wild daughter. I've been told that since I have a boy and girl that means having a 3rd baby shower is bad etiquette. Anybody else on baby 3 and having a shower?

elisnyd16 · April 2015

I think most people only get 1 shower. 3 is a lot to ask people to keep buying you things... If you have your heart set on having one maybe have it be really small with just immediate family and very close friends.

wedding crazed · April 2015

I know a lot of people think more than one shower is bad etiquette, but I never once have thought that going to women's second or third showers. This is my 4th baby and I've had a shower each time. They were thrown for me and MIL and mother would have been offended if I refused. Also, each shower has been smaller and smaller. I am all about celebrating every blessing not just the first. I am obviously not expecting a shower for the 4th time. Oh and they call them sprinkles after the first sometimes. Totally up to you if someone offers to throw you one.

Unknown · April 2015

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oliarnmom1517 · April 2015

We are having small get together a after this baby they won't really be showers...they will be small get togetherness with family and friends to reveal the gender..so I guess small gender reveal parties..but not really a baby shower...if they bring something that's great but definitely won't be required...

oliviaann91 · April 2015

Mmmm I would ere on the side of caution, especially if you have a boy and a girl already. I have a 6 year old daughter and have gotten rid of everything except her keepsake items, but we plan to purchase everything we need for this baby. I would feel a little awkward if I had another full blown shower and the same people came and gave gifts that they gave me at my first shower. All we plan to do is have a BBQ in June for immediate family (who all live in my town so it's convenient) and for dessert have a cake that's either pink or blue inside to reveal the sex. (Not telling them that that's happening though-want it to be a surprise) just saying it's a family dinner. To each their own, but I think of showers as events for brides to be and first time moms.

tugskenyonkel+1 · April 2015

giraffesRamazing said:

wedding crazed said:
I know a lot of people think more than one shower is bad etiquette, but I never once have thought that going to women's second or third showers. This is my 4th baby and I've had a shower each time. They were thrown for me and MIL and mother would have been offended if I refused. Also, each shower has been smaller and smaller. I am all about celebrating every blessing not just the first. I am obviously not expecting a shower for the 4th time. Oh and they call them sprinkles after the first sometimes. Totally up to you if someone offers to throw you one.
What could you have possibly needed for baby #3?

Idk about the other posters but this is baby number 4for me. After baby number 3 I got rid of everything as I am divorced and planned on no more babies. But surprise here I am almost three years later single with a sweet little tequila baby by my best friend. I have nothing left from my last at all so I'm completely starting over.

Most women on subsequent pregnancies do a "sprinkle" where you basically get diapers/wipes and celebrate baby instead of a full shower. Also a lot of moms having sprinkles will ask for books instead of gifts. Just an idea.

lovearoo · April 2015

Well since you asked, that's a no.

Unknown · April 2015

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ash413 · April 2015

No, having a third shower is beyond ridiculous and tacky.

kwaldy · April 2015

To each their own. But I probably wouldn't. At most maybe a family get together where the family just celebrates baby.
But honestly, who cares if it's tacky. If your family wants to throw you one and you want to let them, so be it.

Unknown · April 2015

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Pontot31 · April 2015

My friends and I usually have small get togethers for a second baby but it's like 6 people having lunch.
Otherwise I feel like it's no one else's job to buy you the things you need. When you have a baby you need to assume the responsibility for the items you need.

wedding crazed · April 2015

Baby 3 was my first girl so clothes. With #2 they just brought diapers and wipes since he was my 2nd boy.

soberrysweet · April 2015

Showers are to welcome you to motherhood. Once you are already a mother, you do not need re-welcoming.

Even if you get rid of all your stuff, I don't see how it's the responsibility of everyone else to outfit you with all your baby needs every time you procreate.

soberrysweet · April 2015

tugskenyonkel+1 said:

giraffesRamazing said:

wedding crazed said:
I know a lot of people think more than one shower is bad etiquette, but I never once have thought that going to women's second or third showers. This is my 4th baby and I've had a shower each time. They were thrown for me and MIL and mother would have been offended if I refused. Also, each shower has been smaller and smaller. I am all about celebrating every blessing not just the first. I am obviously not expecting a shower for the 4th time. Oh and they call them sprinkles after the first sometimes. Totally up to you if someone offers to throw you one.
What could you have possibly needed for baby #3?
Idk about the other posters but this is baby number 4for me. After baby number 3 I got rid of everything as I am divorced and planned on no more babies. But surprise here I am almost three years later single with a sweet little tequila baby by my best friend. I have nothing left from my last at all so I'm completely starting over.

Most women on subsequent pregnancies do a "sprinkle" where you basically get diapers/wipes and celebrate baby instead of a full shower. Also a lot of moms having sprinkles will ask for books instead of gifts. Just an idea.

There's so much wrong here I don't even know where to start.

Even if you are starting over, it's really your responsibility to provide for your child. Regardless of whether you planned to get pregnant or not.

I wouldn't say that most women have a sprinkle. I had never even heard of showers for subsequent babies until coming on TB.

Also, you should never, ever dictate what kind of gifts someone should give you. (i.e. diapers and wipes, books, clothes, etc.)

doodleoodle · April 2015

I think it's perfectly acceptable to have a baby sprinkle or a sip 'n' see after the baby is born. If people don't want to bring gifts no one is forcing them.

scw89 · April 2015

My opinion? It's very bad etiquette. If I were invited to a shower for a third baby I wouldn't go. In fact, I was invited to a shower for someone's fourth and I didn't go.

Unknown · April 2015

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YummeeCookee · April 2015

OP, I agree w the others.... No shower for 3rd baby.

gumby22c · April 2015

I also think showers for subsequent babies are a no-no. Espcially #3.

lola2bee · April 2015

giraffesRamazing said:

kwaldy said:
To each their own. But I probably wouldn't. At most maybe a family get together where the family just celebrates baby.
But honestly, who cares if it's tacky. If your family wants to throw you one and you want to let them, so be it.
Society cares

All of society does not care or we wouldn't have these baby shower debates on a weekly basis. But nice try WNing on behalf of mankind.

soberrysweet · April 2015

lola2bee said:

kwaldy said:
To each their own. But I probably wouldn't. At most maybe a family get together where the family just celebrates baby.
But honestly, who cares if it's tacky. If your family wants to throw you one and you want to let them, so be it.
Society cares

All of society does not care or we wouldn't have these baby shower debates on a weekly basis. But nice try WNing on behalf of mankind.

:-?

lrjac12 · April 2015

Is it strange that I've never heard about showers for subsequent babies being bad etiquette? I've always been super excited for baby showers and thought it was more of a celebration for parents to be and baby..the guests are there to show how happy they are for the parents and to celebrate with them. I thought the gifts were just a plus. Maybe the way I've thought about them is completely wrong? Lol

Boudin&Crawfish · April 2015

I agree that it looks greedy. If your family really wants to have a party then just have a party, but not a shower. After a horrible loss my family wanted to celebrate my third pregnancy, but I told them I wasn't going to have a shower for my third child. Instead, we had a lovely dinner at a restaurant and just enjoyed each other's company and showed gratitude for the new life we were receiving. It was a great way to get together and enjoy my pregnancy with loved ones without others having to shell out cash for the party and gifts.

Mason112715 · April 2015

What these ladies are crazy. A baby shower for each child is fine. It is very old school to only have one shower. If you have most of what you need maybe think of doing a sprinkle or a diaper party. You are bring a beautiful life into the world and if you want to have a shower I say go for it.

Unknown · April 2015

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UnicornFarts1125 · April 2015

So glad I'm "old school". To me that = class and manners. Winning!

Unknown · April 2015

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soberrysweet · April 2015

Mason112715 said:
What these ladies are crazy. A baby shower for each child is fine. It is very old school to only have one shower. If you have most of what you need maybe think of doing a sprinkle or a diaper party. You are bring a beautiful life into the world and if you want to have a shower I say go for it.

If she's asking here, obviously showers for subsequent babies are really not commonplace in her social circle. If she's being told that it might not be well received, how is it good advice to tell her to "go for it?"

Having manners is never old school. It shows the people around you that you are considerate of their feelings (and in this case, their time and money). How is that a bad thing or something that could ever be considered old fashioned?

I always bring a gift to a friend or relative who has had a new baby. I don't need to be invited to do so. However, having a shower for each baby just seems like a gift grab and AWish.

ashleykt333 · April 2015

Unicorn farts are so classy! Haha

Unknown · April 2015

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tugskenyonkel+1 · April 2015

soberrysweet said:

tugskenyonkel+1 said:

giraffesRamazing said:

wedding crazed said:
I know a lot of people think more than one shower is bad etiquette, but I never once have thought that going to women's second or third showers. This is my 4th baby and I've had a shower each time. They were thrown for me and MIL and mother would have been offended if I refused. Also, each shower has been smaller and smaller. I am all about celebrating every blessing not just the first. I am obviously not expecting a shower for the 4th time. Oh and they call them sprinkles after the first sometimes. Totally up to you if someone offers to throw you one.
What could you have possibly needed for baby #3?
Idk about the other posters but this is baby number 4for me. After baby number 3 I got rid of everything as I am divorced and planned on no more babies. But surprise here I am almost three years later single with a sweet little tequila baby by my best friend. I have nothing left from my last at all so I'm completely starting over.

Most women on subsequent pregnancies do a "sprinkle" where you basically get diapers/wipes and celebrate baby instead of a full shower. Also a lot of moms having sprinkles will ask for books instead of gifts. Just an idea.
There's so much wrong here I don't even know where to start.

Even if you are starting over, it's really your responsibility to provide for your child. Regardless of whether you planned to get pregnant or not.

I wouldn't say that most women have a sprinkle. I had never even heard of showers for subsequent babies until coming on TB.

Also, you should never, ever dictate what kind of gifts someone should give you. (i.e. diapers and wipes, books, clothes, etc.)

My dear you can keep the attitude and judgement to yourself. I never claimed I was having a shower or expecting someone else to provide for my child. I've never had a shower and never will. A previous poster asked what one could possibly need when having their third child. That part of my response was to that.
Second it's very popular for women to have sprinkles for showers and ask that instead of gifts they bring books for the baby.

gumby22c · April 2015

C'mon, no one is saying you can't celebrate each baby. If you want to celebrate, have a small get together or party. But having a shower where there is a registry for people to buy gifts or if your invitation requests something (like diapers or books) for subsequent children is gift grabby and obviously not well received by a fair amount of people. As evidenced by the responses in here.

Unknown · April 2015

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Candy_bandit · April 2015

I have been invited to second and third baby showers- and gotta tell you ladies- if you think no one is talking about how tacky it is, you are very wrong! I refuse to go, my mother and older lady relatives attend but literally all that is talked about is how tacky it is. It's a gift-grab, everyone knows it and if you are going to do it just own that fact instead of trying to claim it is not bad etiquette.

allrightmeow · April 2015

My sister is throwing HERSELF her third full blown over the top shower because she is a tacky gimme pig. She legit could purchase every single thing she needs for this baby with the money she is spending and STILL have money left over.

UnicornFarts1125 · April 2015

ashleykt333 said:
Unicorn farts are so classy! Haha

You must be new here...

soberrysweet · April 2015

tugskenyonkel+1 said:

soberrysweet said:

tugskenyonkel+1 said:

giraffesRamazing said:

wedding crazed said:
I know a lot of people think more than one shower is bad etiquette, but I never once have thought that going to women's second or third showers. This is my 4th baby and I've had a shower each time. They were thrown for me and MIL and mother would have been offended if I refused. Also, each shower has been smaller and smaller. I am all about celebrating every blessing not just the first. I am obviously not expecting a shower for the 4th time. Oh and they call them sprinkles after the first sometimes. Totally up to you if someone offers to throw you one.
What could you have possibly needed for baby #3?
Idk about the other posters but this is baby number 4for me. After baby number 3 I got rid of everything as I am divorced and planned on no more babies. But surprise here I am almost three years later single with a sweet little tequila baby by my best friend. I have nothing left from my last at all so I'm completely starting over.

Most women on subsequent pregnancies do a "sprinkle" where you basically get diapers/wipes and celebrate baby instead of a full shower. Also a lot of moms having sprinkles will ask for books instead of gifts. Just an idea.
There's so much wrong here I don't even know where to start.

Even if you are starting over, it's really your responsibility to provide for your child. Regardless of whether you planned to get pregnant or not.

I wouldn't say that most women have a sprinkle. I had never even heard of showers for subsequent babies until coming on TB.

Also, you should never, ever dictate what kind of gifts someone should give you. (i.e. diapers and wipes, books, clothes, etc.)
My dear you can keep the attitude and judgement to yourself. I never claimed I was having a shower or expecting someone else to provide for my child. I've never had a shower and never will. A previous poster asked what one could possibly need when having their third child. That part of my response was to that.
Second it's very popular for women to have sprinkles for showers and ask that instead of gifts they bring books for the baby.

Regardless of whether it's popular, it's still rude to dictate to your guests what to buy you. Common does not always = good. Just FYI.

Mason112715 · April 2015

Oh man, celebrating a life is never bad etiquette. Also all of the women here seem to stand so high on there soap boxes. It's a shame. Guess this app. Is not for me. And to the women that keeps referring to "getting kocked or having sex" I think you should look in the mirror when telling someone about class.

Mason112715 · April 2015

Also I am pregnant with my second and I am going to have a baby showers with all the trimmings and love ever minute of it!

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