Quit Job while TTC: how much will a baby really cost?

stargazer801 · April 2015

Hello All,

This is my first community post. I'm just looking for some advice. I'm rather unhappy at my current job and often daydream of quitting. My husband and I are currently trying to conceive. Would I be stupid to quit my job and lose that income at this time in our lives? We could easily live off our savings for a bit but us plus a new baby might be a stretch. Basically, how much is pregnancy really going to cost me? I do have health insurance through my husband's job so the only perk of my current position is the pay. Thoughts?

VesperLove · April 2015

It really depends on your husband's income, your bills, and what you have left over. My DH and I are close to a point where we will be deciding if he will stop working or go part time. But we have worked our finances to allow that.

Do you mean just the pregnancy or the birth/hospital costs as well? That is where the majority of cost will be, obviously.

Jags8 · April 2015

How much it will cost you will entirely depend on your insurance and what hospital you go to, as well as what kind of birth you have. It could cost you $1000, or it could cost you $10,000+.

missteacherlady16 · April 2015

msgreen21 said:
Hello All,
This is my first community post. I'm just looking for some advice. I'm rather unhappy at my current job and often daydream of quitting. My husband and I are currently trying to conceive. Would I be stupid to quit my job and lose that income at this time in our lives? We could easily live off our savings for a bit but us plus a new baby might be a stretch. Basically, how much is pregnancy really going to cost me? I do have health insurance through my husband's job so the only perk of my current position is the pay. Thoughts?

Yes, it is stupid.

I have a job I don't like too. But even without a baby, we need the money. So I keep working. Once I am in a better position to look for a new job, I will. Once I have an offer for a new job, I will respectfully leave my current job.

I wouldn't suggest living of your savings unless you absolutely have to.

ETA: unless your husband makes a good enough salary that he can comfortably support both of you - but yeah, babies are expensive even with good health coverage.

LauraSmarterSpam · April 2015

missteacherlady16 said:

msgreen21 said:
Hello All,
This is my first community post. I'm just looking for some advice. I'm rather unhappy at my current job and often daydream of quitting. My husband and I are currently trying to conceive. Would I be stupid to quit my job and lose that income at this time in our lives? We could easily live off our savings for a bit but us plus a new baby might be a stretch. Basically, how much is pregnancy really going to cost me? I do have health insurance through my husband's job so the only perk of my current position is the pay. Thoughts?
Yes, it is stupid.

I have a job I don't like too. But even without a baby, we need the money. So I keep working. Once I am in a better position to look for a new job, I will. Once I have an offer for a new job, I will respectfully leave my current job.

I wouldn't suggest living of your savings unless you absolutely have to.

ETA: unless your husband makes a good enough salary that he can comfortably support both of you - but yeah, babies are expensive even with good health coverage.

Completely agree!

ShamrockGirl518 · April 2015

1. Why would you want to cut into your savings before a baby arrives? You should keep that money and add more to it. Babies are expensive!

2. Would you be living check to check if you didn't have a job and a baby arrived? I have seen family and friends go into serious credit card and loan debt by trying to do this. Is this what you want? Dont you want to provide all you can for a child?

3. My company gives a week of paid leave for every year you have worked here. If you start somewhere new you may only get the bare minimum of time off to be with your baby. I am looking at 6-8 months between what they give and state gives.

IMO you should ride it out. Stay with your company while TTC. I personally would even use my maternity leave through them. While on leave you can determine how hard it would be and then make the final decision before going back.

Jessie42613 · April 2015

I agree.

We all fantasize about quitting our jobs. But it's a poor decision. Suck it up for now and save your money.

27alex · April 2015

Agree it's stupid.

Scout27 · April 2015

If your husband's salary could support both of you and a baby without dipping into savings, that would be one thing. But I agree with PP that it's stupid to live off savings while trying to conceive. Stick it out at your job, keep that salary coming in and add to your savings.

Rabbitheart15 · April 2015

If you hate where you are right now, make some changes.

I'm more "adventurous" in this regard than most people. I always encourage others to take a leap when it comes to jobs.

But I think you can't have it all. Either quit your job, but put TTC on hold until you've got something now (which is what I did before TTC #1). Or start looking for a new job while TTC, but don't quit the old one just yet.

For what it's worth, Dh and I were able to save quite a bit until DD arrived, now our paychecks cover our costs, but don't leave enough room to save. Daycare is the biggest cost though, which you can avoid if you're a SAHM. Diapers, milk and clothing add to the bill as well, but those costs aren't drastic.

(Edited to add some more info)

LoveLucy0413 · April 2015

Assuming I get my bfp this cycle (or any cycle actually) I plan to work until LO arrives and potentially not go back after maternity leave. Try the SAHM thang for a year or two.

This would be #2 for us (DD is 2.5 years). So the reality of paying for day care for 2 is really not worth it for me to work. It all depends on your & DH income. If you sit down and realize he can't absorb the obligations that are covered by your income (in addition to costs associated with a new LO) then it is best to keep working. Sucks, I know. After DD I was forced to go back to work because it made the most sense financially.

Best of luck in your decision. Talk it out. Do some calculations, only you know what is best for your family

kymberheinze · April 2015

As stated by some others, it all depends on your husbands income. My husband carries the insurance for us as well. I was in the same situation as you-hated my job. My husband went over finances and decided that we could afford for me to leave my job and stay home with my son. We are out a little money, but not much after figuring in fuel costs and daycare. If you can swing it, staying home with a baby is awesome.

Some things we did to make it more affordable was cloth diapers and wipes, breastfeeding, shopping mom2mom sales and we are on a strict budget.

Just some thoughts :-)

heawilliams · April 2015

At OP - I've been in your shoes and I know what I'm going to say is way easier said than done (plus I don't know all the circumstances), so here is a quote...

"The only thing you can really control is your response/attitude to your surroundings."

While in this stage of your life, I would look and focus on the positives in the job you're in now.

Change the way you see your job and you'll be surprised at how others respond to that and this may get you through TTC and pregnancy.

Not to sound all rainbows and hugs and glitter, but a positive outlook is contagious and leads to a different perspective of the world.

Good luck.

27alex · April 2015

Keep in mind some states/companies require you've been there a certain amount of time before you qualify for paid maternity leave.

Sometimes, you either need to suck it up, or put things on hold.

surferP528 · April 2015

Sometimes I feel more dissatisfied at my job when nothing exciting is going on in my life. Maybe you need to plan some outside of work activities that will keep you entertained and having fun.

I wouldn't quit my job until I found a new one, especially if I was planning on adding a child to the equation. Losing insurance and extra income is a scary thing. I would hold out or start looking for something new (keeping in mind previous posters advice about qualifying for benefits/leave, etc.)

VesperLove · April 2015

It's all about perspective as well.

DH hates his job and yes, ultimately we are working to get him out of it. But, for a long time that wasn't an option. We were able to talk about ways that he could change his perspective to make it easier for him. For example, he was working on a few big projects that he hated but we realized that those were great projects to put on his resume ... so, he started looking at them as that. Started taking notes on his role in different parts of the project, updating his resume regularly, making sure he was tracking everything should he choose to leave. It made it easier to get through them.

He also, as @surferP528 mentioned, found some things outside of work that kept him busy and entertained. His whole life was his job for awhile - he'd come home frustrated and vent about work and sit around before going to bed and then going right back to work. By balancing things out and adding in some other things he really enjoyed then work just because a job again ... not something he had to dwell on. He'd go during the day but be excited to come home and do other things.

Maybe there are some things like that that you can add in. Sometimes a job really does just need to be looked at as a means to an end ... yes, it's great if you can be in a job you love and are passionate about, but when you can't, look at it as what it is -- something to allow you to prepare well for the other things you want (a baby, etc).

firebaby688 · April 2015

If you feel you need to get a new job, I would say hunt before you quit. I've always had more responses when I apply to places while employed than when I quit and then look.

missteacherlady16 · April 2015

firebaby688 said:
If you feel you need to get a new job, I would say hunt before you quit. I've always had more responses when I apply to places while employed than when I quit and then look.

Second this - large gaps in your work history need to be explained (and are harmful to your resume if they can't be explained).

Suck it up and keep working while exploring other options.

[Deleted User] · April 2015

Honestly, even with your husband's job you should still keep working. My mother never had to work because my dad always made really great money, but she chose to anyway. Then BAM the company takes a turn and my dad gets laid off. No warning. So thank goodness my mom was working! It's one thing to be in that situation when it's just two adults, but when there is also a baby in the picture you REALLY don't want to be in that situation.

stargazer801 · April 2015

Thanks for all the advice! My current company only has unpaid maternity leave so it's not like I'm losing out if I do leave. But I would like some extra money saved up by the time baby comes as most posters mentioned. I think I'll consider not coming back after maternity leave so I'll start keeping an eye on the job boards so I'm ready when the time comes.

Also, as for the posts to do more fun stuff outside of work... I'm also in school so my time is rather full. And one reason why I'd like a new, less time consuming job. But that's a whole other story.

missteacherlady16 · April 2015

msgreen21 said:
Thanks for all the advice! My current company only has unpaid maternity leave so it's not like I'm losing out if I do leave. But I would like some extra money saved up by the time baby comes as most posters mentioned. I think I'll consider not coming back after maternity leave so I'll start keeping an eye on the job boards so I'm ready when the time comes.

Also, as for the posts to do more fun stuff outside of work... I'm also in school so my time is rather full. And one reason why I'd like a new, less time consuming job. But that's a whole other story.

Honestly, if you're that unhappy - I'd probably start looking for a job now.

1. You don't know how long it's going to take you to conceive - not trying to be a downer but it takes a healthy couple up to 1 year to conceive

2. Again, avoid long gaps in work history - you'll have to explain to a future employer that you left your previous job because you had a baby. I don't work in HR and even though it shouldn't matter, I would worry that someone might find that undesirable.

3. Do you really want to transition into a new job when you have a newborn at home? I know that's a tough call, but I couldn't imagine having a baby, getting used to being a FTM, actively seeking a new job, interviewing and then learning that new job. That sounds stressful

As PPs said, don't put your life on hold because you're TTC. If you can, find a new job now (or as soon as possible) and get acclimated there.

Rabbitheart15 · April 2015

missteacherlady16 said:

msgreen21 said:

2. Again, avoid long gaps in work history - you'll have to explain to a future employer that you left your previous job because you had a baby. I don't work in HR and even though it shouldn't matter, I would worry that someone might find that undesirable.

I don't work in HR either, but if you're in school, I'd worry less about this. You could always explain that you wanted to focus on your education.

missteacherlady16 · April 2015

Rabbitheart15 said:

missteacherlady16 said:

msgreen21 said:

2. Again, avoid long gaps in work history - you'll have to explain to a future employer that you left your previous job because you had a baby. I don't work in HR and even though it shouldn't matter, I would worry that someone might find that undesirable.

I don't work in HR either, but if you're in school, I'd worry less about this. You could always explain that you wanted to focus on your education.

Are you actually in school? That would need to go on you resume to explain the gap.

Monilee1017 · April 2015

It really depends and we can't really answer that for you. You need to sit down and look at your bills and your insurance policy. I will tell you that for my DS2 we had some issues and once I hit 30 weeks we had weekly doctors appointments, twice weekly NST and weekly ultrasounds. Each there own appointment, each there own copay. We could handle it but stuff like that adds up fast.

If you hate your job why not look for a new one? But as mentioned in PP you need to look into your state and your companies policy about maturnity leave, it might not be worth it to quit. If your going to get a good percentage or extra time you may want to consider staying.

ememoh · April 2015

My husband and I are currently trying something to see if we could afford for me to stay at home. So we are putting my entire paycheck into savings each month and trying to live off of his (still putting an additional small amount from his paycheck into savings each month as well, which is what we would try to do if I stayed at home). This is our first month doing this and it's going okay so far, but things are going to be tight! It's going to be good that we'll have a good chunk of cash stashed away if and when the time comes that I'm a SAHM because we will be living quite frugally to make it happen.

yl1m32015 · April 2015

ememoh said:
My husband and I are currently trying something to see if we could afford for me to stay at home. So we are putting my entire paycheck into savings each month and trying to live off of his (still putting an additional small amount from his paycheck into savings each month as well, which is what we would try to do if I stayed at home). This is our first month doing this and it's going okay so far, but things are going to be tight! It's going to be good that we'll have a good chunk of cash stashed away if and when the time comes that I'm a SAHM because we will be living quite frugally to make it happen.

We are similar. Actually when we bought our house we were engaged and I was just graduating nursing school. We decided to make sure all our bills and needs could be paid with DHs salary, and whatever I made was for savings, emergencies, and fun stuff. We've worked with a financial advisor from the start to prepare and save. This way, if I want to be a satm, I can.

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