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September 2015 Moms
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Baby's father(emotional breakdown)

aavila18aavila18 member
in September 2015 Moms
so the baby's father and I recently split up about 2 weeks ago. He's admitted that the split has helped him realize some good things and he said he hasn't thought of getting back together not because he doesn't want to or he does but he just doesn't think about it. We're on good terms and still pretty much talk every day. He has recently started to take me to eat or go on Starbucks/jamba "dates?" To still talk and be close to the baby and I. I'm starting to wonder if I'll be okay with being single and with this baby and not get my hopes up even though we might never get back together. Or if I'll get him back by some motivation on his part. I had to end it because he wasn't being my boyfriend/partner in this. He had problems from a mistake I made before we found out about the baby and among other little things I didn't Think was okay. So I ended it, it hurts like hell but I know I did the right thing. I just feel ridiculous because it's so easy now to be around each other and co exist as best friends and because we have to for the baby. But loving him hurts, especially when I'm having an emotional day or meltdown he's the person I want to run to but when does it become not okay to run to my ex-bf even though I'm having his baby? I'm afraid I'll become too dependent on him to vent and to just relieve stress and talking to him because my family isn't exactly easy to talk to about any of this. He says he wants me to go to him when I need to vent since he knows I can't physically relieve stress or pressure like I used to. I have been doing more things for myself and hanging out with my friends more. He's going to be a great father and has told me he will always be around, wants to help me pay for things but I don't want his money or to feel this jealousy for my own baby because his/her father loves him more than he loves me. He loves me but not enough to fix things to be with me. It's not fair, I just want him and his time. It's hard to feel like you're not enough even though it's not true. I know I'm enough and it'll get easier to be without him as my best friend and my love. But I don't want to get used to it.
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Re: Baby's father(emotional breakdown)

  • mrseh5mrseh5 member
    Have you said all this to him???? Is there definitely no chance of you getting back together. If no then it will get easier and at least he is still supportive of you and baby.
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  • ktbkittenktbkitten member
    I agree, you should talk to him about all of this. 
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  • aavila18aavila18 member
    Yes I spoke to him and told him everything. I don't know what the chances are which is why I'm having such a hard time letting Gods plan unravel. my fear that I'll be a single mother raising my baby with my ex bf is overwhelming upsetting because I didn't picture this future as a possibility. We're co existing so well that it doesn't make sense to me. I'm just struggling and his parents have no idea because he doesn't have a good relationship with them but his and my closest couple of friends know we're broken up. I have to pretend to the ones who don't know that it's all fine and I'm struggling. I don't want to answer people's questions or have to endure my mothers questions on if we're back together yet Every day like I do now. I don't have the capacity to be this hormonal and crying every week. I'm so lost
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  • excited2bmommy09excited2bmommy09 member
    I'm sorry, break ups are so hard especially when kids are involved. I would say stay open and honest with him if you are wanting to get back together, but don't overwhelm him or push too hard either. He clearly cares for you and your baby, maybe he needs some time to work out things in his own head. It's hard, but try to keep up the faith that everything is going to work out the way it should. Focus on you and baby the best that you can. Hang in there hon!
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