Only DH - I'm having an RCS. I wanted my mom to be there with my first, however DD arrived early, and my mom was half way across the country. In the end I'm really happy with how it all worked out. I feel like it was really good for DH and I to have only each other to rely on in that moment.
F that! You do NOT have to ask your MIL. You're the one pushing the baby out. Don't let anyone boss you around or make you feel guilty about who you want there.
F*cking obnoxious abbreviation is what it is. Nobody says "dear husband" in casual conversation but everyone uses it in these forums. No idea why. DD is "dear daughter;" DS is "dear son." They're all dumb abbreviations, though.
Anybody that wants to be before I start pushing. After I I start pushing just my SO.
I had like 6-10 people in my room at times before I started pushing. They were all pretty close family. It didn't bother me one bit. I enjoyed the company while I waited for my baby. I was very relaxed and calm though.
I think just my husband. I'm not 100%, because I want my mom to be there, but if she is there I think we would probably have to ask my MIL, and I don't really want that, so most likely just my husband.
nope, your body, don't invite MIL if you don't want to.
With DD I invited anyone to the hospital, some stopped in and saw me prior to me getting extremely uncomfortable. I decided when I was done with the visiting. Only my Sister and DH were in the room when I was really uncomfortable and through the pushing. Once baby was there, I allowed people to come see for a few min, then everyone had to leave so that I could nurse and rest. DH and my sister were the only ones who I let stay. Everyone was very understanding.
With this LO, I'm allowing DH, my sister, and his sister to stay in the delivery room. They may not all be there due to travel and schedules, but no one else. I plan on the same visiting plan after baby arrives also. The next day, or at least several hours later I'll be ok with a few short visits.
I second this. There is no reason you need to invite your MIL just because you invite your mom. She's your mother. She birthed you. It's totally ok to be alright with her seeing your vagina but not being ok with your MIL seeing your vagina. It's different. Up to you, of course, just dont let anyone make you feel guilty for wanting no one but your mom and husband there. It is perfectly natural. Personally I will probably just have my husband there, havent decided about my mom.
Me-24~~ DH-25~~Married 6/15/2013~~Pregnant with our first due April 2, 2015~ Septate/ Bicornuate/Arcuate /some kind of not-normal uterus- won't know for sure which one till after babe is born~~Hoping for a full term baby!
Anybody that wants to be before I start pushing. After I I start pushing just my SO.
I agree with @frownyface I wanted to make people happy so I let people come in and then got bitched out because I didn't want other people to come in. It made me super stressed out. My sister was there a good bit of the time but she had just left a club (it was after 11pm), was partially drunk, and just passed TFO on the couch. So that didn't bother me at all. It actually have me and DH something to laugh about.
Just don't be afraid to say GTFO if you become uncomfortable. Don't suffer because you don't want to hurt their feeling.
F*cking obnoxious abbreviation is what it is. Nobody says "dear husband" in casual conversation but everyone uses it in these forums. No idea why. DD is "dear daughter;" DS is "dear son." They're all dumb abbreviations, though.
No this will not be my first child. This will be my second. With my first one I only had my ex H in the room with me. Mainly because we were so far away from our home, but I had so many complications I ended up having several (7) doctors in the room by the time I had my son. Thats why I really don't care who's in the room with me this time.
Just DH. With DS it was just him and I was happy with that. This time around it will most likely be a C-section, so he is pretty nervous about being in the OR, but I told him he just gets to sit next to me and stare at not have to worry about seeing anything he doesn't want to (he's still pretty squeamish about childbirth).
I am pregnant with my third and it will be the same as the previous two times: Just my husband and me in the delivery room. I love my mom, mom-in-law, sisters dearly, but this is a special moment for us as a couple. Nobody should overshadow the importance of my husband on baby's birth day. I know lots of girls who invite their mom or sister.. my advice is just to make sure your husband is 100% okay with it.
In the delivery room? Ha! No way is anyone but my hubby (and trained medical professionals) going to be in there.
I'm less than pleased about the fact that my in-laws will probably decide to sit in the waiting room the entire time, let alone watch me labor.
This! I told both sides of the family that we will text them when we head to the hospital to give them a heads up but I don't even want them heading to the hospital until after the baby is actually here and we settled into our room. The thought of people waiting for me in the waiting room irritates me.
I am pregnant with my third and it will be the same as the previous two times: Just my husband and me in the delivery room. I love my mom, mom-in-law, sisters dearly, but this is a special moment for us as a couple. Nobody should overshadow the importance of my husband on baby's birth day. I know lots of girls who invite their mom or sister.. my advice is just to make sure your husband is 100% okay with it.
I agree with this. I was very specific with my sister when DD was born that she was there for me. I mean it's a pretty extreme thing to go though, and my sister basically helped take care of me while DH took care of the baby. She helped me to the bathroom and filled my peri bottle up and handed me things I needed in the shower and such.
When DD came out, DH went over with the NICU team with her. My sister stayed with me and helped me tremendously.
For my daughter, I had originally said that I only wanted DH in the room, but after everything my mom ended up staying in the room as well. It was a great moment for her.
This time, I feel like my mom will be at home with my daughter when I go into labor, so it will just be DH.
Well I'm being non traditional , hey I wore aqua as my wedding dress , I'm thinking I might get my brother in laws military training group to fly over and do an honor guard as bub leaves my vagina. This would be something that would mean a lot to me, I'll even pay their expenses. It would be a symbol of always being protected. Then I will call him Phoenix justice and the karma gods will rejoice. I'll then have his placenta for dinner , on a pizza.
Well I'm being non traditional , hey I wore aqua as my wedding dress , I'm thinking I might get my brother in laws military training group to fly over and do an honor guard as bub leaves my vagina. This would be something that would mean a lot to me, I'll even pay their expenses. It would be a symbol of always being protected. Then I will call him Phoenix justice and the karma gods will rejoice. I'll then have his placenta for dinner , on a pizza.
Well I'm being non traditional , hey I wore aqua as my wedding dress , I'm thinking I might get my brother in laws military training group to fly over and do an honor guard as bub leaves my vagina. This would be something that would mean a lot to me, I'll even pay their expenses. It would be a symbol of always being protected. Then I will call him Phoenix justice and the karma gods will rejoice. I'll then have his placenta for dinner , on a pizza.
My doula (also a placenta doula and photographer) and husband will be with me. Calling my parents a few days after I get home from the hospital and MIL a few weeks later.
My husband will definitely be there (pending the military, baby girl, and Mother Nature all cooperate with the schedule) and I am in the same boat about having my mom there, she had a Csection for me and my sister so she never experienced a regular birth and I think I'd like her there but I feel pressure b/c my MIL is a nurse and may feel like if my mom is in there that she should/could stay too. My husband has used the "she's a nurse she's seen it all before" line and if he does for this he may need his own doctor...
Just my husband!! I am an OB nurse and I see people bringing tons of family/friends and it inevitably turns into a cluster F. People get loud and disruptive, make the mom super anxious, and tend to make this beautiful experience about themselves and don't allow mama to rest. As a nurse it's hard to explain procedures/ give education when there are so many interruptions and people acting like they are here for a party.
Just me and the hubby! I told him if my parents are in town I might scream for my mom but he's like "noooo I want this to be just us. They weren't there when we made her, they're not gonna be there when she comes out"
Just hubby and doula like with our first. But, last time my hubby had a grand mal seizure in the middle of my labor so my sister may come too just to give me a little more peace of mind that someone can be with my husband if something happens.
My DH and my mom. It's does cause some anxiety wondering what to do with the in-laws because I know DH wants them involved. I just want to be able to labor in peace since this is a VBAC and not have to worry about them sitting in the waiting room. My dad will be at our house with my 4 year old son and he will come up later with DS once I have had time to recover. Apparently my in-laws plan to storm the hospital and wait in mass. I've tried to tell DH that I would like for them to wait until I'm ready for visitors. You know be able to recover a bit first but he seems to think its fine that they will be waiting and I have a feeling he will want them in there as soon as baby comes out. maybe with my mom there I'll have some back up. She is mostly there to keep DH safe once my prego hormones decide it's time to kill him while I'm in labor.
I can't even imagine going through that at a time like this! You will need your support system with you.
Long story short, I was completely blind sided. It was very sudden, I had no idea he was on drugs. He ODd on heroin and my 4 yo daughter found him (luckily we were up visiting my family and my father was able to get a heartbeat and breathing again until EMTs got there to wake him up w Narcan). I've always feared a pain pill addiction but not that. He endangered our daughter and I'll never forgive him for that. For my family's safety that is the last day both my daughter and I have seen him.
So so terrible! That guy has made some bad choices and I am sure will be regretting them for the rest of his life (as he should!!). I have a 4 year old as well, and I am sure she was scared out of her mind because of that experience. You are a strong strong women!
Re: Who will be in the delivery room?
I delivered so fast (pre term labor) with my son. My husband and parents (couldn't get out of the delivery room) were there last time.
I second this. There is no reason you need to invite your MIL just because you invite your mom. She's your mother. She birthed you. It's totally ok to be alright with her seeing your vagina but not being ok with your MIL seeing your vagina. It's different. Up to you, of course, just dont let anyone make you feel guilty for wanting no one but your mom and husband there. It is perfectly natural. Personally I will probably just have my husband there, havent decided about my mom.
Me-24~~ DH-25~~Married 6/15/2013~~Pregnant with our first due April 2, 2015~ Septate/ Bicornuate/Arcuate /some kind of not-normal uterus- won't know for sure which one till after babe is born~~Hoping for a full term baby!
I wanted to make people happy so I let people come in and then got bitched out because I didn't want other people to come in. It made me super stressed out.
My sister was there a good bit of the time but she had just left a club (it was after 11pm), was partially drunk, and just passed TFO on the couch. So that didn't bother me at all. It actually have me and DH something to laugh about.
Just don't be afraid to say GTFO if you become uncomfortable. Don't suffer because you don't want to hurt their feeling.
I'm less than pleased about the fact that my in-laws will probably decide to sit in the waiting room the entire time, let alone watch me labor.
@frownyface
No this will not be my first child. This will be my second. With my first one I only had my ex H in the room with me. Mainly because we were so far away from our home, but I had so many complications I ended up having several (7) doctors in the room by the time I had my son. Thats why I really don't care who's in the room with me this time.
I am pregnant with my third and it will be the same as the previous two times: Just my husband and me in the delivery room. I love my mom, mom-in-law, sisters dearly, but this is a special moment for us as a couple. Nobody should overshadow the importance of my husband on baby's birth day. I know lots of girls who invite their mom or sister.. my advice is just to make sure your husband is 100% okay with it.
I agree with this. I was very specific with my sister when DD was born that she was there for me. I mean it's a pretty extreme thing to go though, and my sister basically helped take care of me while DH took care of the baby. She helped me to the bathroom and filled my peri bottle up and handed me things I needed in the shower and such.
When DD came out, DH went over with the NICU team with her. My sister stayed with me and helped me tremendously.
Factor V Leiden Homozygous, Advanced Maternal Age
TTC #1, 5 yrs, PCOS, Femera + Ovidrel.
IUI#3 BFP, DD 5/31/2012
TTC #2, 2 yrs, PCOS, Femera+Ovidrel
IUI#2 BFP!
DD Born August 16, 2012
This would be something that would mean a lot to me, I'll even pay their expenses. It would be a symbol of always being protected. Then I will call him Phoenix justice and the karma gods will rejoice. I'll then have his placenta for dinner , on a pizza.
Bahahah I can't even.
People get loud and disruptive, make the mom super anxious, and tend to make this beautiful experience about themselves and don't allow mama to rest. As a nurse it's hard to explain procedures/ give education when there are so many interruptions and people acting like they are here for a party.
But I agree, the support is nice but I think I only want my BF there, ftm and delivering the first grand baby so the family is excited!
I filed for divorce at 30 weeks pregnant so my ex husband is not welcome.