Tandem BF

goosenpumpkin · February 2015

Is anyone else currently BF another child or have experience tandem feeding a toddler and a newborn? I've got an almost 2 yr old (feb 23) who has totally ramped up the BF in the last 3 months. For a while, it seemed like he was going to self wean, and I was thrilled, but he took a turn for the extremely clingy and BF all throughout the day and all night long most nights. I just don't know how this transition is going to go down. Last time I had a two yr old and a newborn, the 2 yr old had been weaned already.

msarnold1013 · February 2015

I have a personal issue with breastfeeding a child for that long. But if I could suggest anything, if you think it's going to be too much on your body then STOP. Your newborn will need your breast milk way more then a 2 year old who I'm sure is getting fabulous nutritional supplements in other forms.

zakiyascott3 · February 2015

I breastfeed until I was about 5 months pregnant with my second child, my first was about 15months. My midwife warned me to stop soon, because your milk changes and becomes fatty in preparation for the next child. Your nursing child is going to love the new taste and not wean off. You have to stop your oldest or you will be nursing two kids.

Also, stop nursing your oldest at night. I am assuming she has all front teeth in...it is just like giving the baby a bottle to go to bed. It can cause rapid decay of the front teeth. A 2 year-old can make it through the night.

goosenpumpkin · February 2015

I BF all of mine to nearly 2 yrs (this is #5). I do know that my kids are never sick when all our friends' and acquaintances' kids are really going through the ringer every sicky season. The fatty change in breast milk making it more appealing makes sense though. I'm not really looking to debate whether or not my 2 yr old is getting anything from it. According to the WHO, until the age of 3, they def are still getting nutritional benefits and antibodies. I guess what I'm looking for are the experiences of moms who have gone through breastfeeding two kids (not twins) at the same time, and how they made it work (or didn't make it work).

AlinnJo · February 2015

Wow. What horrible advice and misinformation. I have not tandem nursed but did talk to my dr. about it since I was still nursing my 2 year old 5 months into this pregnancy. She said it was no problem to continue nursing. The only thing I needed to do when the baby came was feed the baby first before the toddler. I'd say start talking to and preparing your toddler now about the baby needing milk first since they can't have any other food. Prepare your LO for having to wait. They may not even like the taste of the new milk. Also, kellymom.com has great info on tandem nursing. Good for you for nursing this long. It's quite an accomplishment!!

goosenpumpkin · February 2015

@AlinnJo‌ Thanks for the advice! And I will def check that link out.

LilLambkins · February 2015

You are brave woman! My little boy began weaning when I got pregnant because my milk supply dropped so much. He was probably weaned like the end of first trimester and I was glad because I became way too sensitive. I don't know if you have access to a lactation consultant but I would think they would have great advice.

selena61307 · February 2015

Some of the garbage told to you hear is just that, garbage. Glad you have the sense to do your own research. The overnight feeds are not rotting your kids teeth. OMG I just can't even. Good for you deciding to tandem. The milk will change because your body will prioritize the new baby first. If you are happy and comfortable bless you. I didn't tandem because my 2 are farther apart. The people I know who did it and made it work basically set the rule baby first you get what's left for the older child. The older kids all were okay with it or weaned without fuss. Lots of cuddle time will help. Hugs to you from another long term nurser

kelseypie · February 2015

msarnold1013 said:
I have a personal issue with breastfeeding a child for that long. But if I could suggest anything, if you think it's going to be too much on your body then STOP. Your newborn will need your breast milk way more then a 2 year old who I'm sure is getting fabulous nutritional supplements in other forms.

You have a personal problem with nursing a 2 year old lol? You do realize the WHO recommendation for breastfeeding is until the age of 2 and beyond right?

OP, I don't actually have any advice. Mine self weaned at 17 months when I was 20 weeks. I hope things work out if you end up tandeming. I've known many people who've successfully done it. Good for you!

zakiyascott3 · February 2015

I am a dental professional and work with young children. You should not allow your child to fall asleep on the breast and nurse through the night. It is just like putting a child to bed with a bottle. It will cause rapid decay of the front teeth. I am not here to try and convince or scare anyone, but educate. This is research. You can go to the AAPD (American Academy of Pediatric Dentistry) website and research yourself.

Ambethsco · February 2015

I'm in the same boat. My daughter is almost two and we've been slowly working on weaning through this whole pregnancy. We've had our ups and downs... She got sick in the fall and started relay nursing again because it was the only thing that comforted her. Now she's almost completely night weaned and when she tries to nurse out of boredom I give her a time limit. We count to ten and then she has to stop. It's like a game to her now and she starts clapping when we get to ten. I was told by people that I needed to quit cold turkey, but that just didn't seem right to me. I understand the frustration with the night feeding.... It's so very hard not getting the rest you need when you're in your third trimester and know that an infant is on the way and you have to start all over. I keep telling myself that the benefits outweigh the frustrations. Sorry I don't have better suggestions!

goosenpumpkin · February 2015

Thanks, ladies. Lots of good advice and encouragement. I think there will be a definite learning curve to this. As far as the tooth decay, like I said, I have BF all of mine (so far that's been 4) until the age of 2 and their teeth are fine. I do brush their teeth with coconut oil, rather than traditional toothpaste, and that might have more of a residual protective quality? Idk, but that isn't a concern for me. @Ambethsco‌ If it comes down to weaning my 2 yo, I will def try it your way!

littlecuddlesB · February 2015

You aren't concerned they are not getting the fluoride and things in traditional toothpaste?

goosenpumpkin · February 2015

No. My older kids use fluoride toothpaste, but I'm just not comfortable with the littles who don't know how to spit toothpaste out properly swallowing it. The coconut oil is safe for consumption and is antibacterial, anti fungal and anti viral. It seems every dentist we've ever been to has a different take on whether or not fluoride is dangerous or whether it's worth the risk, so I would rather play it safe and stick to something completely natural and non toxic.

melynh · February 2015

I very rarely post, but I can't not on this topic, especially after reading all those negative comments. I am in a similar situation, I currently have an almost 22 month old who nurses 1-2 times a day

Tandem nursing is very normal and healthy! If you are feeling up to it, you can definitely continue! Please read Adventures in Tandem Nursing by LLL. It's an excellent book and covers all areas of potential concern with tandem nursing.

Your body is more than capable of making enough milk for a toddler and an infant. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise! The above mentioned book gives lots of advice on how to feed both a babe and a toddler.

Of course your milk is going to change composition, but that doesn't mean it's a bad thing for your toddler. Nutritional benefits from breast milk never stop; there is no expiration date.

Also, as previously stated by others, breast milk does NOT cause tooth decay. Especially because when nursing, the milk essentially goes right into the throat because the breast is taking up the whole mouth if there is a good latch.

@AlinnJo‌ gave lots of good advice!

Good luck!!

goosenpumpkin · February 2015

@melynh‌ Thanks for the book recommendation! I'm really not worried about having enough milk either. I'm one of those mamas who tends to overproduce. What I'm most worried/uncertain about is nighttime feeding schedules, and the fact that my nipples are killing me. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about! But hopefully, after I have this baby the tenderness will subside and it won't be such an issue. Did your 22 month old cut back to 1-2 feelings on their own, or did you kind of help that cut back along?

littlecuddlesB · February 2015

I actually am totally convinced. Once my little one gets teeth I'm gonna ask my pediatrician about coconut oil and if she says it's a good idea I might do the same.

melynh · February 2015

goosenpumpkin said:
. Did your 22 month old cut back to 1-2 feelings on their own, or did you kind of help that cut back along?

He did it on his own, it actually made me super sad! I totally know what you're saying about nipple soreness too, that went away in the second tri and has recently started up again.

amymac8108 · February 2015

I would have tandem nursed if I could have...we got pregnant when our DD was 8mo and I got to just over a year before my milk supply was gone and she weaned herself. I'm hoping to be able to pump some extra and mix it in with her sippy cup.

jfjamie · February 2015

I've tandem nursed 3 times and getting ready to for a 4th time with the birth of our 8th child. (I've been nursing 10 years nonstop, I nurse until 3) I always get such a shock from the nurses in the hospital when they come in and I have a toddler on one breast and a newborn on the other. If you can do it, go for it, an added bonus of tandem nursing is no engorgement! Please do your own research with kellymom and other valid nursing websites there is alot of misinformation in this thread.

ju123 · February 2015

I currently don't breastfeed because my daughter is 8 but I did breastfeed her until 2 when she weaned herself as supply was smaller, however if I had gotten pregnant I would do both no problem

goosenpumpkin · February 2015

jfjamie said:
I've tandem nursed 3 times and getting ready to for a 4th time with the birth of our 8th child. (I've been nursing 10 years nonstop, I nurse until 3) I always get such a shock from the nurses in the hospital when they come in and I have a toddler on one breast and a newborn on the other. If you can do it, go for it, an added bonus of tandem nursing is no engorgement! Please do your own research with kellymom and other valid nursing websites there is alot of misinformation in this thread.

Thank you! Encouraging to hear from someone who has done this successfully and more than once! Now, this is not a huge concern for me, Just curious... But did you find that you gained weight tandem feeding? I've read that some women experience this. Although, I'm fortunate enough to be a prolific producer of breast milk, those same hormones make it hard to nearly impossible for me to lose most of my baby weight until I wean. I started this pregnancy almost 20 lbs over my normal weight since I hadn't weaned my last little guy yet. I'm totally willing to endure the extra weight for a a few yrs, but I'd be lying if I said it wouldn't make me a little sad. Lol.

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