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March 2015 Moms
jillbabe91
member
*vent*
jillbabe91
member
I had a friend before I was pregnant who I would hang out with a lot and go out with, "bestfriend" supposedly. Well I found out I was pregnant and we hung out once after that and then she stopped talking to me all together! No how are you's, texts or calls, nothing. Well, 8 months later, out of the blue yesterday she calls me saying she just found out a couple days ago she's pregnant and how we can have "play dates" now. The hell? Where were you this whole time before you were pregnant???? I guess I'm negative Nancy over here but I think that's pretty messed up that you want to be my friend now..anyone else experience some messed up stuff with family/friends while being pregnant?
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Re: *vent*
Although it doesn't make it right, your friend probably didn't know how to relate to you anymore once you told her you were pregnant. I'll be honest, I haven't done very many "fun" things since I've become pregnant and I can see why my friends don't invite me out as much anymore. I think many people go trough this.
If this had happened to me, I would try to rekindle the relationship that I had with my bestfriend.
Two years later she ran into another one of my friends and asked to get in touch with me. We talked, and she was pregnant. She tried being best friends like we were before. We are cool now, but for me it will never be the same. To top it off, she named her daughter the same name as mine ... Weird.
Be friendly , but don't force yourself to try to have the same bond you did before. Let ut happen naturally if it does
@jadams0927 I am so sorry for your loss. I went through a miscarriage 4 years ago. I understand you cutting her off cause of the pain of her bringing it up and sometimes instead of telling the truth and being upfront you just cut the person off cause it's too painful to handle at the time. And your right! I am very mad at her still and it made me even more mad that she called me acting like nothing had happened asking me all these questions like what doctor I use etc. I honestly wanted to yell at her (hormones X( ) and be rude but I wasn't.
Like @noodlienoodles said, maybe so she felt like she couldn't relate till now but it really hurt my feelings and I don't think I can have friends who just come and go like that. I think she finally realized how pregnancy is, you don't really go out, you are low key, and now she's turning to me cause she realizes that hoping I'll hang out with her since I'm in the same boat.
Not everyone is at that point yet. Sounds like your friend may have had other priorities that were differing to yours, and guess what? That's okay!
I always remind people who complain that they haven't heard from me in a long time, that they too have phones. If they are so concerned, they could have called or texted as well. So perhaps ask yourself the same thing, if you really truly valued your friendship, were you also holding up your end? Were you making phone calls? From your original post, it sounds like you expected all the work to come from her end. No where did you say you attempted to call her, you only expected her to call you. Which she did to tell you of her happy news.
I think if you value your friendship, you squee in her news as well as you both are on a similar track in life of being mommies.
It is weird ! And my name is Christina, and hers is Kristin.
There were a lot of heinous things said toward me that I couldn't put behind me. Bottom line if you feel hurt by it still go with your gut. Rekindle if your heart is in it.