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STM+ baby shower?

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Re: STM+ baby shower?

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  • adtaylor2015adtaylor2015 member
    edited February 2015
    @LoveLee85‌ GTF out with that BS about women who think 2nd showers are ok can't afford their kids. What an ignorant statement.
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  • LoveLee85LoveLee85 member
    At whatever your name is. Lol I liked your comment because I don't care what you think! If you actually knew how to read, you would see my comment didn't say "people who think 2nd showers are okay can't afford their kids".....I didn't say that. Learn how to read please!
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  • LoveLee85LoveLee85 member
    courtney198078 said:

    But see where you all are wrong is that you assume people will be irritated about a second or third shower. And it doesn't mean we can't afford it. Maybe your friends and family would be irritated but mine would be upset with just the opposite and you all act like people are forcing people to come and bring gifts. We enjoy get togethers and feeding lots of people we like entertaining. We could care less about the presents and we can afford new stuff for 10 more kids if we wanted so I wish people would stop assuming that those that have second showers are gift grabby and needy I don't understand why people can't post their opinion wether they agree or not in a respectful manner without being rude and insulting other posters opinions.

    You asked for what people thought...don't be upset that people are now telling you what they think. Common sense goes a long way here.
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  • courtney198078courtney198078 member
    LoveLee85 said:

    At whatever your name is. Lol I liked your comment because I don't care what you think! If you actually knew how to read, you would see my comment didn't say "people who think 2nd showers are okay can't afford their kids".....I didn't say that. Learn how to read please!

    Then what were you referring too when you said "if you can't afford a baby......don't have one."
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  • adtaylor2015adtaylor2015 member
    edited February 2015
    LoveLee85 said:

    At whatever your name is. Lol I liked your comment because I don't care what you think! If you actually knew how to read, you would see my comment didn't say "people who think 2nd showers are okay can't afford their kids".....I didn't say that. Learn how to read please!

    You said if you can't afford kids, don't have them? What else could that possibly mean? Maybe you need to learn how to convey your opinion so we can understand what it is you are trying to say. It's hard to get past all of the obnoxious, condescending crap.

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  • Cupcakequeen1000Cupcakequeen1000 member
    @butthurtpolice‌ I'd rather be cupcake than butt hurt .. your name suits you too. Im happy with that
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  • courtney198078courtney198078 member
    LoveLee85 said:

    courtney198078 said:

    But see where you all are wrong is that you assume people will be irritated about a second or third shower. And it doesn't mean we can't afford it. Maybe your friends and family would be irritated but mine would be upset with just the opposite and you all act like people are forcing people to come and bring gifts. We enjoy get togethers and feeding lots of people we like entertaining. We could care less about the presents and we can afford new stuff for 10 more kids if we wanted so I wish people would stop assuming that those that have second showers are gift grabby and needy I don't understand why people can't post their opinion wether they agree or not in a respectful manner without being rude and insulting other posters opinions.

    You asked for what people thought...don't be upset that people are now telling you what they think. Common sense goes a long way here.
    As you said you came in late on this I am not the OP and I didn't ask for anyone's opinion so maybe you should take your own advice obviously common sense didn't go very far for you
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  • LoveLee85LoveLee85 member
    courtney198078 said:

    LoveLee85 said:

    At whatever your name is. Lol I liked your comment because I don't care what you think! If you actually knew how to read, you would see my comment didn't say "people who think 2nd showers are okay can't afford their kids".....I didn't say that. Learn how to read please!

    Then what were you referring too when you said "if you can't afford a baby......don't have one."
    I'm pretty sure it's common sense to make sure you can afford a baby before you have one! LOL Sorry this is breaking news to some of you. No where did I say what the girl who can't read quoted me on. LAUGHABLE. If you don't want someone's opinion, don't ask. It's that simple, people. In my OP I didn't attack anyone......I gave my honest opinion, like asked. If affording baby gear was an issue for some, I was even nice enough to give some ideas for finding baby gear. Gosh, I'm so mean!
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  • courtney198078courtney198078 member
    I'm confused you didn't say if you can't afford a baby don't have one???


    And all I responded to you was that after you quoted me no where have I asked for you or anyone's opinion.

    And I didn't say you were mean.
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  • LoveLee85LoveLee85 member
    adtaylor2015 said:

    LoveLee85 said:

    At whatever your name is. Lol I liked your comment because I don't care what you think! If you actually knew how to read, you would see my comment didn't say "people who think 2nd showers are okay can't afford their kids".....I didn't say that. Learn how to read please!

    You said if you can't afford kids, don't have them? What else could that possibly mean? Maybe you need to learn how to convey your opinion so we can understand what it is you are trying to say. It's hard to get past all of the obnoxious, condescending crap.

    Is it so shocking that you shouldn't have kids if you can't afford them?!? LOL OMG I'm so sorry that some of you are hearing this for the first time!! Also, don't quote me saying things I didn't say because that's an obnoxious/ignorant move to make. Take your own advice.
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  • courtney198078courtney198078 member
    But now that you mention it saying someone can't read is not very nice!
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  • LoveLee85LoveLee85 member
    edited February 2015
    Oh, I forgot....the new bump is all about sunshine and glitter rainbows!!!!! Have a very blessed nine months!
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  • 19gem8719gem87 member
    Thank you everyone for your opinions
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  • crunchymamaof2 crunchymamaof2 member
    LoveLee85 said:
    Oh, I forgot....the new bump is all about sunshine and glitter rainbows!!!!! Have a very blessed nine months!

    I just have to laugh at all these SSs threatening to report the very people who built this community. And the clear lack of consideration some people have towards their nearest and dearest.
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  • Cupcakequeen1000Cupcakequeen1000 member
    edited February 2015
    I find it hard to believe anyone who would build a community with good intentions could be so vile to the people on here. That doesn't add up. This was a great thread until those certain people started badgering the characters of the people apart of their community. I dont attend this post to be rude but if you go back and read you will see this.
    And if you are truly saying that this person owns or built this site, i now have a completely shocking different view of it. There are other wonderful sites i am a member of.
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  • crunchymamaof2 crunchymamaof2 member
    Cupcakequeen1000 said:
    I find it hard to believe anyone who would build a community with good intentions could be so vile to the people on here. That doesn't add up. This was a great thread until those certain people started badgering the characters of the people apart of their community. I dont attend this post to be rude but if you go back and read you will see this. And if you are truly saying that this person owns or built this site, i now have a completely shocking different view of it. There are other wonderful sites i am a member of.

    Oh please. Vile? Badgering? I think not. And the people that own this site suck and ruined the awesome community that 3000+ built. What's left is this hollow shell filled with rainbows and glitter and people who think they're super special and rules don't apply to them. Thankfully there are still a few old members left who are Willing to be honest. If you want vile why don't you take a look around and see what the owners of this site did to it's members, the ones that brought in all the revenue (the true purpose of this site) that recently dwindled.m
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  • Cupcakequeen1000Cupcakequeen1000 member
    edited February 2015
    You think not...i think so
    Being honest is completely different from being outright offensive by attacking the character of a person. Im the first to say its perfectly fine to have different opinions but when you go about atacking somone as a person because you dont agree with them, that is pretty awful.
    Btw i never said the site didn't have a good purpose i said im shocked on how someone would treat many of its members on this forum
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  • Ali+CeeAli+Cee member
    I'm actually glad that this question was asked. Reading the comments has opened my eyes more into the etiquette world (I'm not saying that to be rude or anything, either). I'm pregnant with our second and I never would have thought to not have a shower because everyone already bought me presents for my first, but that does make sense to me now. It's every woman's choice and I won't judge, but I'm glad I have some things to think about to avoid looking "greedy" or "tacky". I like the gender revealing BBQ idea and specify no gifts. Like someone mentioned earlier, loved ones will bring the baby little gifts when he/she is born anyways. Every woman is different and every woman has their own view on it.
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  • ABombard12ABombard12 member
    My sister was in a similar situation. She was pregnant for my niece 7 years after having my nephew. Over the years she had given away a lot of her baby stuff to our cousins, friends, etc so she had nothing. She felt a little uncomfortable having another "shower" so I threw her a "sprinkle". The invitation read something along the lines of since she had given a lot is her baby stuff away to help other moms to be, come and sprinkle mom and baby. It was a surprise (well supposedly she ended up knowing I had to explain the concept before she killed me for throwing another shower but she has NOtHING). She didn't register for anything and it was very nice. Not a huge to so like a first time shower but a sprinkle of love :)
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  • 19gem8719gem87 member
    If I could figure out how to delete this, I would!
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  • v1wwov1wwo member
    Bluebird - you let it go. People are leaving nice comments and you just find ways to troll them.
    Let people do what they want to do. They are not inviting you to them so just .....
    Let it go,
    Let it gooooo
    Can't hold it --- guh!... The song is in my head now.
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  • snikaisnikai member
    I have never heard of NOT having a baby shower for any pregnancy. This will be my third child after 10 years and I've never had a shower, so I want to have one this time. I want to do a gender reveal at the shower, play games, and bbq, etc and I'm not so concerned with the gifts, but I know my friends and family will insist I tell them what gifts I want, so I was thinking about just making a registry with cheap stuff that I can use and buying the big items myself.
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  • 0MegaMommy0MegaMommy member
    I am a STM my oldest is 4 and I didn't know when we would have another one. He old crib was falling apart all of her stuff got handed down to friends who were having babies att. I plan on having a baby shower/BBQ for my family in New York because they didn't get to come to the one I had for my daughter which was in Maryland. Now how many of you send out invites to these showers. I know many people who have put on there that they do not want gifts especially if it is for a second. Now I know most people will get gifts anyway so why is it an issue if they want to. If your telling them they don't have too and they do anyway. You can't say they are expected to because you didn't want them too. I am sorry I don't care what anyone thinks I am going to celebrate another member of my family with good food music and love. Presents aren't important to everyone. I may not have everything I had with my daughter but I will get it. You can't just assume everyone is after gifts because they wanna have a baby shower. That right there is tacky.
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  • courtney198078courtney198078 member
    The only obnoxiou
    viwwo said:

    Bluebird - you let it go. People are leaving nice comments and you just find ways to troll them.
    Let people do what they want to do. They are not inviting you to them so just .....
    Let it go,
    Let it gooooo
    Can't hold it --- guh!... The song is in my head now.

    Obviously she can't let it go she is even posting links to this thread on other boards so other people can trash the comments.
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  • crunchymamaof2 crunchymamaof2 member
    The million dollar question- if simply getting together with family and friends to celebrate the new baby, why can't you throw a party after baby is born? That way the person of honor, the baby, is present, and no one will feel obligated to buy gifts.

    Hint: because you want presents and the attention on YOU. If it were truly about the baby the above idea would be just fine.
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  • ewilson74ewilson74 member
    0MegaMommy said:

    I am a STM my oldest is 4 and I didn't know when we would have another one. He old crib was falling apart all of her stuff got handed down to friends who were having babies att. I plan on having a baby shower/BBQ for my family in New York because they didn't get to come to the one I had for my daughter which was in Maryland. Now how many of you send out invites to these showers. I know many people who have put on there that they do not want gifts especially if it is for a second. Now I know most people will get gifts anyway so why is it an issue if they want to. If your telling them they don't have too and they do anyway. You can't say they are expected to because you didn't want them too. I am sorry I don't care what anyone thinks I am going to celebrate another member of my family with good food music and love. Presents aren't important to everyone. I may not have everything I had with my daughter but I will get it. You can't just assume everyone is after gifts because they wanna have a baby shower. That right there is tacky.


    Lurking.
    It is poor form to dictate how your guests should spend their money. Whether that be a diaper raffle, a book instead of a card, or even no gifts. Yes, people are going to buy you gifts even if you say not to. But the person who actually followed your request now feels uncomfortable. Hosting a meet the baby bbq or sip & see is a much better idea. By calling it a shower you are telling people to buy gifts.
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  • jlawson23jlawson23 member
    I don't understand why some people feel the need to be rude. If the woman wants a shower for her second child after 6 year... let her! And those who find it tack or "gift grabby" do not have to attend. It's unfortunate that society always want to find a negative aspect to everything.
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  • crunchymamaof2 crunchymamaof2 member
    jlawson23 said:
    I don't understand why some people feel the need to be rude. If the woman wants a shower for her second child after 6 year... let her! And those who find it tack or "gift grabby" do not have to attend. It's unfortunate that society always want to find a negative aspect to everything.

    It's unfortunate that many in society feel entitled to gifts and attention for every little thing.
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  • jlawson23jlawson23 member
    It's not about attention and entitlement. So you're saying if you had one child and then let's say 10-15 years later you were pregnant again you would find it inappropriate to have a baby shower of some kind? It's not as if she just had a baby last year. But if she did... Who cares. I think it's fine to give advice, but labeling people and judging them for the way they live is not necessary.
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  • Knottie00400192Knottie00400192 member
    crunchymamaof2 said:

    The million dollar question- if simply getting together with family and friends to celebrate the new baby, why can't you throw a party after baby is born? That way the person of honor, the baby, is present, and no one will feel obligated to buy gifts.



    Hint: because you want presents and the attention on YOU. If it were truly about the baby the above idea would be just fine.

    Because who feels like throwing anything after baby gets here? Lol people are pathetic. Stop with all the negative energy and learn to be happy and positive especially during your pregnancy! Have an awesome day bump mommies!!!! Live your life and do what YOU want to do!!! XOXO
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