People are missing a sensitivity chip...or am I overreacting??

Leonard3 · January 2015

For some reason, oh yea it is the month of Resolutions - everyone in my circle is trying to lose weight. Which I am overjoyed for them, it is hard work to lose weight. But after hearing all of the details everyday about it (from what they ate, what weight they are in now, how great they feel, can't wait to be skinny) I feel like shit. Do they realize I have a human growing inside me, making me fat and cramming up my insides and guess what - I have to be ok with it. I have to workout still everyday and still gain weight with a smile on my face. I am entirely grateful to have a baby, but the gaining weight and hurting all of the time I would say is the downside.

Am I overreacting to all of this?

mrs1374a · January 2015

...yes. And the baby is not making you fat. This is my second baby and neither have made me "fat". Did I gain weight? Yes, that's what happens when you're pregnant.

PrimRoseMama · January 2015

I think you are over reacting. However, that doesn't make your frustrations invalid.

bbiutmcph · January 2015

Leonard3 said:
For some reason, oh yea it is the month of Resolutions - everyone in my circle is trying to lose weight. Which I am overjoyed for them, it is hard work to lose weight. But after hearing all of the details everyday about it (from what they ate, what weight they are in now, how great they feel, can't wait to be skinny) I feel like shit. Do they realize I have a human growing inside me, making me fat and cramming up my insides and guess what - I have to be ok with it. I have to workout still everyday and still gain weight with a smile on my face. I am entirely grateful to have a baby, but the gaining weight and hurting all of the time I would say is the downside.
Am I overreacting to all of this?

Over reacting is an understatement. I mean they are trying to get healthier as a group which often is easier than alone. You are pregnant. You will gain weight but you are supposed to. Personally I would probably be joining in on the healthy part because I always try to remain healthy during my pregnancies and always continued eating healthy and exercising. What do you expect people to do? Cater to your conversation topics only because you are pregnant?

Unknown · January 2015

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allrightmeow · January 2015

Yes you are.

jennygirlmt · January 2015

Way overreacting. Many women get more healthy during pregnancy, eating well, staying active. You can still do that without "getting skinny" and then you can be involved with their activities and conversations.

No one stops drinking or talking about delicious wine around me and I haven't thought they were being mean

Amstreagle · January 2015

Yeah umm..... You're being a bit sensitive and just because your pregnant doesn't mean you can't make healthier choices and join in this conversation as well.

heatheremanderson · January 2015

Focus on having a healthy pregnancy. Eat well, exercise (you are pregnant not incapable) and post pregnancy you will have better success with meeting whatever weight loss goal you have at that point but keep in mind - all levels of BMI have expected weight gains in pregnancy (more than just 5 or 10 lbs either)

sweetmama101226 · January 2015

ladycersei said:

Yes you are overreacting. You are entitled to feel the way that you feel. I don't particularly feel like I'm at my best during pregnancy, so I get that. However, that is no one else's problem and it's not fair for you to expect that everyone else change their topic of interest because YOU don't like it. Being pregnant doesn't mean that your feelings on the matter are more important than theirs and that they should change their behavior to accommodate you.

This^^ you will gain weight no matter what. I use to weight 116 and got to 155 with my first baby. so relaxxx. everyone is different. and sorry to notice @ladycersei but congrats! I see you are in your 40 weeks already so baby is around the corner

Unknown · January 2015

This content has been removed.

sweetmama101226 · January 2015

ladycersei said:

ladycersei said:

Yes you are overreacting. You are entitled to feel the way that you feel. I don't particularly feel like I'm at my best during pregnancy, so I get that. However, that is no one else's problem and it's not fair for you to expect that everyone else change their topic of interest because YOU don't like it. Being pregnant doesn't mean that your feelings on the matter are more important than theirs and that they should change their behavior to accommodate you.

This^^ you will gain weight no matter what. I use to weight 116 and got to 155 with my first baby. so relaxxx. everyone is different. and sorry to notice @ladycersei but congrats! I see you are in your 40 weeks already so baby is around the corner
@sweetmama101226‌ Thank you! Now I get to play the waiting game, yay lol

yayyyy!!!

)

KatrinaPR · January 2015

Leonard3 said:
For some reason, oh yea it is the month of Resolutions - everyone in my circle is trying to lose weight. Which I am overjoyed for them, it is hard work to lose weight. But after hearing all of the details everyday about it (from what they ate, what weight they are in now, how great they feel, can't wait to be skinny) I feel like shit. Do they realize I have a human growing inside me, making me fat and cramming up my insides and guess what - I have to be ok with it. I have to workout still everyday and still gain weight with a smile on my face. I am entirely grateful to have a baby, but the gaining weight and hurting all of the time I would say is the downside.
Am I overreacting to all of this?

If you just want to vent to people in the same boat, you're all good. It's a tough journey, don't be too hard on yourself. Hormones are a bumpy ride!

If you think they should alter their conversation/actions, then I'm afraid I would put this into the "overreacting" category, sorry.

I agree that a positive spin on this situation would be to join in on the healthy eating/exercise portion of the conversations that you can relate to.

At my work there are three of us up front, and two of us are pregnant. I sometimes worry that the third girl feels left out or that we talk pregnancy too much around her.

I hope you're able to work through this after getting it off your chest, good luck!

ruby2315 · January 2015

Overreacting, yes, but as others have said, it's okay to be frustrated. Your friends are trying to lose weight, and they're being supportive of each other through the process. That's great, but it's okay to be annoyed. In the same sense, you might be talking about your pregnancy and it's possible that some of them are frustrated because they aren't pregnant. This applies to any life event: getting married, finding a new job, buying a house, etc. People want to talk about it, but someone's going to feel jealous or left out. It's okay to feel that way, but don't ask them not to talk about it.

MummyMegs · February 2015

You're entitled to feel self-conscious; but remember, pregnancy is an incredibly joyful thing, and it's a given that your body will change. People aren't hesitant about sharing their weight loss happiness with you because 1) you have a little person inside you; you're going to be bigger and 2) They assume you know this, are so out-of-this-world-excited and happy, and accept your body will change.

They aren't insensitive; you are a little oversensitive, body-conscious, and hormonal.

You can't ask them not to share. You can join the conversation ("I'll be asking you for tips in ___ months!").

You'll feel better.

JuliaLovesPugs · February 2015

I think it really depends on how much they are talking about it. If the same person is going on for an hour a day or something than I would find ways to limit that conversation (and yes, I've had friends like that). They are not obligated to tailor their conversation to you, but you are not obligated to spend excessive amounts of time listening to a detailed account of their eating and workout habits either.

alissadd · February 2015

I understand where you are coming from. I have the genetic disposition to be overweight and have spent most of my life dieting. It feels weird to be eating more and I occasionally have to remind myself that it's okay. I've just been in the 'dieting' frame of life for two long. But don't compare yourself to your friends. You are in two way different places. And it's great that you are still exercising. Take it easy on yourself.

astreetx3 · February 2015

IMO id say youre just overreacting, being fat and being pregnant are 2 different things. But i can understand if its making you upset, if i were you id address it to them and let them know theyre making you uncomfortable and maybe they'll tone it down a bit

IslamoradaBride09 · February 2015

I'd say pregnancy is as good a time as any to realize that the world does not, in fact, revolve around you. Soon enough you will have a newborn to really drive that lesson home.

qtjo5 · February 2015

Sounds like you may be insecure with your body And it isn't really even about the pregnancy. You are overreacting and should be more worried about a healthy pregnancy and baby than what your friends are eating or not eating.

Once you have your baby you, too, can work on weight loss but at this point why let something you have nothing in common with bother you so much.

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