MIL angry with us for (...)

ashleymarie1027 · January 2015

My attempt to get a new conversation going, for the sake of entertainment...

Anyone's have a MIL (or anyone really) getting on their case about parenting decisions? Share and I'll roll my eyes with you

ashleymarie1027 · January 2015

Here's mine:

my MIL does not approve of our choice to use the BLW method of feeding our little one. She's old school and worries that since we're not shoving baby cereal down his throat every day his "muscles won't developed" (?!?)

She send us emails/texts randomly with her thoughts on what he should be eating and how she is "so worried"

Sigh... Eye roll.

He passed his 6month checkup with flying colors btw (just last week) and I've discussed our BLW with his dr (she approves).

She means well, and loves our LO, but man is it getting annoying!

KatWAG · January 2015

My mom is convinced I am killing my LO because I dont heat up his bottle or purees. When worse (in her eyes) I give him bottle straight out of the fridge. She thinks its cruely and bad for him.

I think its great because he will eat or drink food at any temp.

She also is horrified that I dont give him a bottle before his naps. But if he isnt hungry, I am not force feeding him.

ashleymarie1027 · January 2015

@KatWAG‌ That's hilarious. Mine did something similar with wipes... She's convinced they need to be warm. But what good will a wipe warmer do when we're not at home?

She also tried to convince daycare to put extra blankets in his crib to make him more comfortable... Ugh. that's a legal issue. He'll have to tough it out.

I also get a serious side eye when I warmup his bottle water (for formula) in the actual bottle in the microwave (for 10 seconds). But then again, we have lots of battles about microwave use.
Ps ... The bottles we use are plastic but are microwave safe.

On a side note... One of my biggest pet peeves in life is misunderstanding of microwaves. I studied nuclear engineering, I understand radiation, and I understand how the non-ionizing radiation in a microwave actually works. Nbd for those who don't know, but just don't be afraid of it.

mcvgal · January 2015

No MIL stories from me, but my mom insists that DS2 must not like my milk anymore because he's not drinking 8 oz bottles at a time. She also says he prefers other foods now. I do want him to try other things, but I still want him to drink all the milk he wants.

My mom also thinks DS1 is way behind in potty training because she's never known anyone to not be trained my 3 years old.

shortstack930 · January 2015

This is why I'm kind of glad my MIl barely speaks English. That way, my DH has to fend off all the unwelcome comments instead of me

EllaSmella · January 2015

My MIL thinks that DD is a better sleeper than DS because "you were not as relaxed with DS and he picked up on your stress". Ummmm...maybe he was just a crappy sleeper and DD is not?

missilini · January 2015

The other day my MIL called and in my DHs attempt to make small talk he said DD was constipated. Which led to 100 questions about what we are feeding her. When DH said we weren't giving her rice cereal but rather starting with fruits and veggies; her response was, "well you're the parents, I guess you know best." It was just in that tone though and it totally irritated me.
This was months ago but when his family came to visit my MIL chased DD around with a blanket insisting she was cold. Umm we live in Houston, it's August, she's fine. Also when she was here anytime DD made a peep she insisted DD was hungry. I wasted so much formula that week. For the sake of keeping the peace I just bit my tongue.

chevronseven · January 2015

My MIL is more the judge behind your back type, so if she has any problems with my parenting I will never hear about it. My mom has lots of thoughts, and bless her heart I know she means well, but really. We drove from IA to NJ for Thanksgiving. About 16 hours normally but we hit bad weather plus had to stop more often to feed and change DS and let him stretch, so it took around 20 hours. DS was understandably not pleased, especially since he then had to be in a house he didn't know with a bunch of people he didn't know, so of course I let him nurse as much as he wanted.

"Well no wonder he's getting so big with you sticking a boob in his mouth every time he cries." "Do you think you might be over feeding him?"

Ok first of all he isn't much bigger than average, something like the 60th percentile, so that comment wasn't even relevant. But no Mom, if he wasn't hungry then he wouldn't eat. Nursing is about more than just fulfilling hunger, it's also about comfort, which he needed at the time.

Fast forward to a couple nights later. "I still think if you would just give him a bottle before bed instead of nursing he would eat more and sleep longer." So which is it, am I over or under feeding him? Also, I am reasonably certain he would take the same amount whether from a boob or a bottle.

Honestly I think she may subconsciously be bitter about breastfeeding because it didn't work out for her. I keep telling here there is nothing wrong with formula feeding since I obviously turned out fine, but I prefer to breastfeed. Also since she can't really offer much relevant advice on the matter she might want me to switch to something she knows more about?

cuntasaurusrex · January 2015

My MIL is mad that I exist, I guess. Over the holidays every time I'd walk into a room, A would stop whatever he was doing to stare at me. Sorry, I'm his mom, and babies like and are reassured by their moms. But when I did come in MIL would say "everything was fine and great until YOU came in the room"

She also got super judgey that I didn't put a onesie on him underneath his button-down shirt, sweater vest, and corduroys in the 70+ degree house. He runs hot, and we're not just flagrantly disregarding The Rules for funsies, hag.

ashleymarie1027 · January 2015

@aliletz‌ my MIL likes to "double wrap" our little one too, always tries to keep a onsie on under his pj's. Or she'll get irritated if DH doesn't put Lo's pants back on after a diaper change... We're just playing at home - who says you "need" pants? IMO, that's one of the perks of being a baby.

Kimmi1982 · January 2015

My MIL is a nut case. Over the holidays they stayed with us. I would go in another room to nurse, and everytime I finished she would say "so and so's daughter uses a nursing cover so she can still be social while nursing". Well great for her. DD hates the cover and gets hot and she's at the age now where everything around her is way more fun than eating. So I go in a quiet room where she won't lose focus and we're done in 10-15 min whereas if I did in front of everyone she pulls off and looks around and it takes twice as long.

Then she says, "don't you notice that breast fed babies have big jaws?"
Um... No.

Then "so and so's baby takes formula and was sleeping through the night by 8 weeks." Bullshit.

Just because you didn't breast feed your kids, doesn't mean the rest of us shouldn't. I don't have a problem with anyone that chooses to use formula and we had to supplement the first 2 weeks because DD was slow on the weight gain, and from time to time we mix a bottle of formula cause it's easier than thawing some breastmilk. But for christs sake, be supportive of our choice to nurse.

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