What's the worst advice you've been given?

happygardner85 · January 2015

Well it wasn't advice but more so a comment that made me want to smack my mil. When we were home for Christmas she said that she hopes I am not drinking while I am pregnant. Yes dear mil I get drunk every weekend now.. Really??

jaknutzen · January 2015

I'll never recover from an epidural, I will have back pain for the rest of my life if I get one and will be too drugged to hold my baby after its born. Also I won't give a shit about my dogs and need to take them to the pound. That one almost got the woman telling me pounded in the mouth.

Amberascolese · January 2015

My FIL told me the oatmeal I was eating was to unhealthy and had way to much sugar loaded into it. then proceeded to remove the oatmeal from me and stuck a huge portion size of pasta and garlic bread in front of me that he bought frozen and thawed in the oven full of preservatives and said, this is better for you...

Katerina&Baby · January 2015

jaknutzen said:
I'll never recover from an epidural, I will have back pain for the rest of my life if I get one and will be too drugged to hold my baby after its born. Also I won't give a shit about my dogs and need to take them to the pound. That one almost got the woman telling me pounded in the mouth.

Ahh - my sister also told me that I will no longer love my dogs once the baby is here. What is wrong with people? Never.gonna.happen.

Joolschweetheart · January 2015

preggopooters said:
I was told to get rid of all of my pets (SIL) I have 1 dog 1 cat and 1 turtle who lives in a tank! Not sure wtf she was trying to prove. She thinks the cats gunna suffocate the baby or eat its face off or something and my sweet little pibble mix is not some ferocious monster! She loves kids and would probably die to protect me if god forbid it ever came down to it. (Im sorry if you dont like pitbulls I was the same way until I got mine and its really how you raise them that matters not the breed.)

Rant over but I would appreciate nobody hatin on my furbaby please.

This! A 'friend' told me that my cats were dangerous to have while pregnant. And even if I didn't get rid of them now "I'd have to when baby came". Err, no. Also then went on to tell me that frequent uti's were a result of having cats (and not a baby sat on my bladder obviously). As if I'm some unclean cat lady! That doesn't even make sense!!!

Joolschweetheart · January 2015

Oh and from my sis in law....don't eat/drink dairy, milk has hormones that won't "mix well" with pregnancy hormones. (I'm imagining like hormone wars raging in my body right now).

She's all about the science, yo.

sassypants2010 · January 2015

I love this. My now estranged mil told me with my first that eating potatoes would cause birth defects, sad part is she was a nurse in California in the 80's, drank and smoked pot during her pregnancy with my husband, and had anorexia so she didn't lose her figure and get fat from baby.

Oh and she also said my cats would suck the baby's breath out of his body!

mmo2112 · January 2015

preggopooters said:

@thepancakes‌ heres a link you could post. Its very compelling and very sad might make her shut her yap. https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/20141016124551-98043162-excellent-open-letter-to-non-vaxers

Here's my go-to response (with cites to about 30 different sources) for anti-vax comments/posts/etc.: https://www.iflscience.com/health-and-medicine/dear-parents-you-are-being-lied-0 I don't know how/why I haven't shared it here before. It sounds like @thepancakes is set, but I hope it helps anyone else looking for something like this.

finchfeeder80 said:

I've posted about this before, but I get really sick of the "just you wait"s.

These are the absolute worst. How do people not understand that different women have different experiences? (DH is also getting a bunch of these from colleagues about childrearing, and I think he is about to kick teeth as well.)

thelittlestbee · January 2015

mmo2112 said:

finchfeeder80 said:

I've posted about this before, but I get really sick of the "just you wait"s.

These are the absolute worst. How do people not understand that different women have different experiences? (DH is also getting a bunch of these from colleagues about childrearing, and I think he is about to kick teeth as well.)

Yea... I'm still waiting for that all-day every day morning sickness.

HMack4742 · January 2015

My MIL has the worst advice and sometimes it drives me crazy. When I am not pregnant, I can mostly tune her out but now that the hormones have kicked in, it's much more difficult.
'It's fine if you drink while pregnant. It won't hurt'. Umm, FAS?
My favorite though was when I was 120 pounds 9 months pregnant and instead of letting me buy maternity clothes, she brought over what she deemed her 'fat clothes' from when she was 200 pounds.
I've now had more kids than she so I tell her to shove it now.

leightrain · January 2015

cnoelle92 said:
That when I'm in labor, to act like I'm taking a shit.
Yet it's kind of true, it's just weird for someone to tell me to act like I'm taking a shit to deliver my baby.

I hope your craps don't hurt that bad! lol

I was told not to hold the baby too much after its born because it will spoil it and decrease its growth rate. That breastfeeding is gross and bottle feeding is much more socially acceptable. Oh, and that if I'm stressed during the day, I should go home and have a glass of wine.

lol. Good thing I do my own research. What did people do before the Age of Information?!?

mcp6286 · January 2015

caseycruz02 said:
As a STM it hasn't been so bad but my biggest annoying comment that I've been getting a lot is your so lucky DS is 8 he'll be able to help you so much. When I ask what they mean they say we'll do all the chores and help with the baby. I'm sorry but DS will keep his current chores and I don't expect him to help with the baby. There like that's what kids are for. One lady said that the best part of having kids is so you can slave them around the house. WTF.

OMG. My SIL is also pregnant (due next month) and last time I took my 12 yr old niece out to lunch, she says to me, "Aunt Meghan, is it mean that I don't want a new baby? Mom told me that now my life is over. She said I have to take care of the baby all the time and I can't go out with my friends anymore or play sports because I have to help." The worst part is, I know my SIL was dead serious. I'm so glad you are as appalled by this attitude as I am.

Emilywooddesign · January 2015

I just hate everyone. My mil told me I looked like I was going to explode and that I had a very big belly for being 4.5 months. Ya bitch, I'm having twins stfu. I've been told not to find out the sex, to buy certain types of pacifiers, that labor isn't that bad, that I should co sleep and sleep training is child abuse. The reality is im a first time mom expecting twins- I'm gonna wing it and just try to keep everyone alive, I have no idea if I'm going to do xyz. Leave me aloneeee

malgosia21s · January 2015

Somebody told me that I should let my baby cry and not pick him up when he cries so he learma early on how to take care of himself. I really hate that advise...I'm not a monster.

preggopooters · January 2015

@Joolschweetheart‌ apparently my cats going to eat the babys face off because of the milk. Like seriously wtf... also its not like Im gunna let the baby roll around in the cat box!

neongreen · January 2015

One of DH's superiors at work told him last night that he shouldn't change any diapers. Because "women always run right over to their crying babies", so if he just waits long enough, apparently I'll do all the work.

1) HAHAHAHAHAno.

2) DH did point out that we're having twins, so even if that were the case, I can't change both at the same time.

3) HAHAHAHAHAno.

4) It should come as no great surprise that said superior has been divorced twice.

5) Did I mention HAHAHAHAHAno?

bruunk · January 2015

@preggopooters‌ my husband had heard the old wives tale that a cat will sit on the babies chest and "suck the breathe out" of baby. I pointed out that was ridiculous - if anything our cat will think we have given her a personal heater, but once the baby fusses I'm pretty sure she'll disappear for a bit.

I had a coworker tell me today that even though my husband wants to help, he won't, and I won't want him too anyway, and I'll just curse him out all the time. While I get that if we breast feed it will be easier for me to feed, I'm not knocking DH's enthusiasm (he really wants to help). Nor will I be screaming at him regularly (I've already apologized for the inevitable melt down that will happen after LO is here).

preggopooters · January 2015

@bruunk‌ Ive heard the breath thing too! People are ridiculous the other wives tale that cracks me up is something about if a baby sees itself in the mirror their soul will get stuck or something. Im suprised nobodys told me fairies are gunna steal my baby and switch it with theirs.

esampson1983 · January 2015

People at work keep telling me I have to gain weight... My response is my doctor isn't worried so I'm not going to worry... And anyhow I had really bad MS the first 4 months and lost weight so at least I'm back to my pre- pregnancy weight.

My grandfather told me I'm eating for 2 so I need to eat more- at that point he was tring to get me to eat some fudge... Nope Grandpa. That's not what the pregnancy books or the doctor say. And if I do eat it shouldn't be pure sugar...

Joolschweetheart · January 2015

@preggopooters‌ big lolz at our babies playing in cat boxes like sandpits!

Katerina&Baby · January 2015

malgosia21s said:
Somebody told me that I should let my baby cry and not pick him up when he cries so he learma early on how to take care of himself. I really hate that advise...I'm not a monster.

WTF is wrong with people?! This might actually win for worst advice I've heard of to date.

WifeDeAngel · January 2015

The whole CIO thing, yeah. I've heard that a lot. And putting a little rice cereal in my tiny babies bottle to make them sleep longer. just...no.

laurendutch · January 2015

Nothing specific but I just hate how everyone is such negative Nancys.

My first were twins, and I guess I got a ton of bad advice or things like "I'm sorry". Why are you sorry?.

Oh, but the best story when I was pregnant with my twins was at the dentist office. The crazy receptionist (who had twins 30 years ago) told me how she can predict when babies will come. At the time I was around 24 weeks. So she asked if she could predict mine...me thinking sure why not??? Well, she walks up to me and starts rubbing my stomach. It was so awkward. Another patient walked in and his face was like "WTF". Anyway, she told me that they would basically come at 28 weeks. I was so pissed. Why would you say that? She was wrong. My boys were delivered at 38w1d

MamaBish · January 2015

I've had multiple people (my grandmother, random acquaintances, etc) ask me if I've gotten new bras yet. They insist that I need a new bra even when I tell them that the girls have not grown at all at this point and the current bras are working just fine. Then they say to just get some new ones now anyway -- well how the heck am I supposed to know what size I'll be when this happens?? This doesn't make any sense!

Anjelyk2 · January 2015

At 8 weeks; "Your pregnancy is not viable until 12 weeks"

At 8 weeks; "Buy maternity pads and if you start bleeding, put one on. If within 1 hour it is full - go to the hospital and make sure you cry. That is called flooding and it is the start of a miscarriage ... there is nothing that can be done about that"

At 18 weeks; "Your pregnancy is not viable until 28 weeks"

At 18 weeks; "If you get bad news at your 20-week scan, call me - I am here to give you emotional support"

All these are from my midwife ... who will be dismissed via text message at my convenience.

Ravenclaw314 · January 2015

Anjelyk2 said:
At 8 weeks; "Your pregnancy is not viable until 12 weeks"

At 8 weeks; "Buy maternity pads and if you start bleeding, put one on. If within 1 hour it is full - go to the hospital and make sure you cry. That is called flooding and it is the start of a miscarriage ... there is nothing that can be done about that"

At 18 weeks; "Your pregnancy is not viable until 28 weeks"

At 18 weeks; "If you get bad news at your 20-week scan, call me - I am here to give you emotional support"

All these are from my midwife ... who will be dismissed via text message at my convenience.

What... The actual... Fuck.

bruunk · January 2015

Ravenclaw314 said:

Anjelyk2 said:
At 8 weeks; "Your pregnancy is not viable until 12 weeks"

At 8 weeks; "Buy maternity pads and if you start bleeding, put one on. If within 1 hour it is full - go to the hospital and make sure you cry. That is called flooding and it is the start of a miscarriage ... there is nothing that can be done about that"

At 18 weeks; "Your pregnancy is not viable until 28 weeks"

At 18 weeks; "If you get bad news at your 20-week scan, call me - I am here to give you emotional support"

All these are from my midwife ... who will be dismissed via text message at my convenience.

What... The actual... Fuck.

I second that response. What the fuck?!
#-o

firsttimer86 · January 2015

My non pregnant non mother drunk friend told me "omg u need to talk to xXxX (mutual friend). Bc she knows everything about babies and will help you." Mind you xXxX is not a close friend of mine more like an acquaintance and I don't agree with most of the things she does so for me to HAVE to talk to her is super annoying.

You have to use cloth diapers for the first few months. infants don't poop as bad it's just a smear of poo like a small smear and you can wash it right out.

And this isn't advice but my friends are trying to tell me they are going to teach her everything they know. So I'm scared lol

ombradellarosa · January 2015

I'm just sick of everyone knowing better than me about my body.

The doctor at 8 weeks: "Oh you will discover gas." How does she know what gas I'm already dealing with and what I'll have to deal with in the future? It was just annoying.

My friends interrupting me when I was saying "IF I have a UTI" (I had been to the ER and not-diagnosed with a UTI but that was the doc's best guess): "You don't have a UTI. You would know." I'm sorry, don't compare how often I feel the need to pee with the 90-year-old woman you worked with in the nursing home. I think we might be a little different.

Doctor, husband, and just everyone, in response to "I feel _______" or "I'm having XYZ symptom": "JUST DRINK SOME WATER" I know water is a miracle drink but for goodness sake I don't think it really solves every single problem! And I don't think that every single symptom I'm having is because I don't drink enough water. I think more likely, most of them are because I'm PREGNANT.

/rant

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