---UO---

pnwlover12 · January 2015

Anyone?

pnwlover12 · January 2015

Yeah. I talk about how fat I am all the time. Sorry to those who it upsets..it upsets me too, lol.

MrsTinMKE · January 2015

crawford411 said:

I think it's perfectly fine to talk about weight on the board as long as people are respectful about it. I know it is a sensitive area for a lot of people, but it's not for everyone. There will always be things that trigger insecurities, buy I don't think they need to be avoided by everyone because they bother some people.

@crawford411 - ditto this. I don't mind talking about it. I don't feel like I will be judged by it here, and helps to talk about it sometimes see where others are at as well.

TheOtherJacobsons · January 2015

pnwlover12 said:

Yeah. I talk about how fat I am all the time. Sorry to those who it upsets..it upsets me too, lol.

It's a seriously tough habit to break. I do it all the time, especially before, during, and after my cycle... which is like all month I guess. Throwing around the F word is something I don't even consider is offensive until I am complaining around friends of mine who are larger than me that I don't consider fat. Then I sort of stop talking and it gets awkward because then I feel the need to apologize and in doing so makes it seem like I am calling them fat in a really passive aggressive way and I am so not.

Unknown · January 2015

This content has been removed.

jenndub · January 2015

I am super excited about taking DD1 to her first concert in July. It's One Direction. And I bought the tickets because I really wanted to go and I used her as an excuse to get tickets. I guess my UO is that I think 1D is awesome and I love their music.

pnwlover12 · January 2015

jenndub said:
I am super excited about taking DD1 to her first concert in July. It's One Direction. And I bought the tickets because I really wanted to go and I used her as an excuse to get tickets. I guess my UO is that I think 1D is awesome and I love their music.

Omg. I thought I knew you!

angeltennis3 · January 2015

Agreed on the weight threads...but I do think you should be conscious about how you word it. For example, saying "I want to lose 15 pounds to get back to a healthy weight" is different than saying "I am # weight and feel like such a cow" or " my thighs and stomach jiggle when I walk 'insert demeaning comment about it here' "

Basically, if your comment could make someone else with a similar weight or body image issue feel bad, it needs reworded.

My UO is I am ok with sleep training after six months, and depending on your child's temperament. Flame away, but all of my family members have done some form of sleep training starting at six months and they all have healthy, happy kids who are excellent sleepers.

Also, sleep training does not have to equal CIO.

golfingdarwinfish · January 2015

Nicb13 said:

crawford411 said:

I think it's perfectly fine to talk about weight on the board as long as people are respectful about it. I know it is a sensitive area for a lot of people, but it's not for everyone. There will always be things that trigger insecurities, buy I don't think they need to be avoided by everyone because they bother some people.

Yep. Agreed.

No one said they should be avoided; people that don't want to read it should avoid it. As we do.

golfingdarwinfish · January 2015

Sometimes I am shocked at the things that are not flamed here (or even get a reaction) that would 150% be flamed elsewhere.

pnwlover12 · January 2015

I don't think anyone should have to walk on eggshells regarding words they use to describe their weight or how they feel. As long as you aren't purposefully dissing someone, i.e., "pnwlovers ass is so disgusting" making comments about yourself shouldn't be a big deal. Like, if I say, when I do jumping jacks, my fat flops around in the wind, I don't think anyone else should get butt hurt because their fat also flaps in the wind. Own it.

pnwlover12 · January 2015

golfingdarwinfish said:
Sometimes I am shocked at the things that are not flamed here (or even get a reaction) that would 150% be flamed elsewhere.

...liiiiike? 8->

angeltennis3 · January 2015

pnwlover12 said:
I don't think anyone should have to walk on eggshells regarding words they use to describe their weight or how they feel. As long as you aren't purposefully dissing someone, i.e., "pnwlovers ass is so disgusting" making comments about yourself shouldn't be a big deal. Like, if I say, when I do jumping jacks, my fat flops around in the wind, I don't think anyone else should get butt hurt because their fat also flaps in the wind. Own it.

I think there is a big difference between saying "my fat flops around in the wind" and saying "my fat flops around in the wind and it is the most disgusting thing on the planet". Own your body but I think it is just common courtesy in language used around body Image. But to each their own!

I am just glad it's an interesting UO today because they have been kind of dull UO that are really popular opinions lately!

golfingdarwinfish · January 2015

pnwlover12 said:

Sometimes I am shocked at the things that are not flamed here (or even get a reaction) that would 150% be flamed elsewhere.
...liiiiike? 8->

Nothing really. I just feel like people who are offended end up apologizing for being offended rather than the offender actually being called out for being offensive. It probably doesn't happen that often, but when it does it sticks with me because I feel shitty for the person who was offended.

(and I'm not talking about weight, I agree with @crawford411 's above comment.)

staryb · January 2015

Agreed about the weight thing. I actually think its good for me to talk about it, otherwise I might just ignore it more. Discussing my weight on here forces me to own up to it and acknowledge that I need to do something about it.

My UO: I don't know how unpopular it really is but I am all for toys that light up and make noise. I love seeing DD react to them, she gets so excited when something moves or blinks in front of her. She talks and jumps and physically tries to move closer to them and grab at them. They really distract her when she gets fussy. Maybe I'm over stimulating her, I don't know, but in terms of physical and mental development I feel like these toys have had a positive effect on her.

bumpuser10309732 · January 2015

The weight shit did piss me off while pregnant because I was pretty sensitive about it so right or wrong I bitched about it. I was really insecure about numbers and call it lucky, I had never been in the position to watch that number climb like that. Then when people would be like oh I'm only up 15 and I'm sitting over here 35 lbs heavier it made me pretty fucking nervous and I didn't feel that way until people started posting stuff on here. I seriously brought it up to my doctor every. single. time. In hind sight I should have avoided the trigger and that was dumb on my part. It was a new territory for me I just wasn't equipped to navigate emotionally.

jenndub · January 2015

pnwlover12 said:

I am super excited about taking DD1 to her first concert in July. It's One Direction. And I bought the tickets because I really wanted to go and I used her as an excuse to get tickets. I guess my UO is that I think 1D is awesome and I love their music.
Omg. I thought I knew you!

I also have Foo Fighters tickets if that redeems me at all. I like a lot of different kinds of music. I saw Paul McCartney in concert when I was pregnant with Lennon and it was the best day of my life.

golfingdarwinfish · January 2015

theresat858 said:

I don't understand why there needs to be 2 Breastfeeding announcements. Can we link the old one into the new one and unsticky it? I am so happy for everyone that is able to Breastfeed. But it really sucks to not be able to and have so many reminders of it.
I thought the old one was going to be unsticky-Ed. It is linked in the other. Maybe @golfingdarwinfish‌ or @pnwlover12‌ could do that today.

I'll do it now.

@scottysgirl77

Another one was started because I started the original thread and then was very emotional when I was unable to BF. Emerald was kind enough to start another one so I would no longer get a notification every time someone posted in that thread.

golfingdarwinfish · January 2015

Nicb13 said:

golfingdarwinfish said:

pnwlover12 said:

Sometimes I am shocked at the things that are not flamed here (or even get a reaction) that would 150% be flamed elsewhere.
...liiiiike? 8->

Nothing really. I just feel like people who are offended end up apologizing for being offended rather than the offender actually being called out for being offensive. It probably doesn't happen that often, but when it does it sticks with me because I feel shitty for the person who was offended.

(and I'm not talking about weight, I agree with @crawford411 's above comment.)

I did that yesterday with Emerald but I did so because I like her and it's not worth it to me. Yes, she pissed me off with her comment but her and I have both been around the boards for a long time and if she were my friend IRL, I'd let it go there too. Some things just aren't worth a fight and I'm cool walking away and saying "to each their own". Also, it's not surprising that Emerald and I are VERY different when it comes to parenting so things will come up that she does, and I don't agree with and vice versa.
I definitely wouldn't be that way with some random person posting nonsense or something that bothers me. I would speak up and own it.

I know you would! I wasn't trying to call you out; sorry if it felt that way!

golfingdarwinfish · January 2015

crawford411 said:

Here's another. It irritates me when people talk about how "things are done" on other boards or on TB in general. I don't give a shit whether a person has spent 5 years on other boards (like Parenting, TTGP, or whatever). I don't want to hear about how other groups do it. In my head, O14 is the only board that really matters. This does not mean that I don't want to read interesting or flame worthy threads on other boards. It just means that if O14 wants to shit glitter, we should be able to shit glitter without hearing that we are doing it wrong.

Dude, I didn't say O14 was doing it wrong. If I didn't like it here I wouldn't be here. Pointing out a difference does not mean it's inherently right or wrong. If it's done a way here that means people want it done that way, it doesn't make it right or wrong, or rather, I guess it does because it makes it right for this board.

Saying I don't like something or that it frustrates me doesn't mean O14 or its members are doing something wrong.

andrieya · January 2015

angeltennis3 said:
Agreed on the weight threads...

My UO is I am ok with sleep training after six months, and depending on your child's temperament. Flame away, but all of my family members have done some form of sleep training starting at six months and they all have healthy, happy kids who are excellent sleepers.

Also, sleep training does not have to equal CIO.

I'm okay with cry it out and will be okay starting it when I think LO is ready. I can't stand when people get all judgey about that one!

staryb · January 2015

Here's another. It irritates me when people talk about how "things are done" on other boards or on TB in general. I don't give a shit whether a person has spent 5 years on other boards (like Parenting, TTGP, or whatever). I don't want to hear about how other groups do it. In my head, O14 is the only board that really matters. This does not mean that I don't want to read interesting or flame worthy threads on other boards. It just means that if O14 wants to shit glitter, we should be able to shit glitter without hearing that we are doing it wrong.

I feel like O14 is a safe haven, its pretty much the only board I'm ever on. Sometimes I'll lurk around on other boards and consider posting but then I'm just like nope better not. The ladies on the shower board are particularly scary IMO with all of their traditional rules and entitled judgyness. I'm sure they're all nice IRL but in my head imagine them looking/acting like Dolores Umbridge from Harry Potter. All prim and proper and ready to pounce on the first person who dares to stray one inch from traditional shower etiquette. Maybe that's a bit harsh but seriously, they scare me lol

Raesofsunshine1 · January 2015

andrieya said:

angeltennis3 said:
Agreed on the weight threads...

My UO is I am ok with sleep training after six months, and depending on your child's temperament. Flame away, but all of my family members have done some form of sleep training starting at six months and they all have healthy, happy kids who are excellent sleepers.

Also, sleep training does not have to equal CIO.
I'm okay with cry it out and will be okay starting it when I think LO is ready. I can't stand when people get all judgey about that one!

I also am okay with CIO sleep training. I started it with DD about 7 months when I felt like nothing else was working. She rarely gave me longer than a two hour stretch of sleep anytime until we started letting her CIO. She caught on quick though and we didnt have to do it long.

Edit: I am so embarassed. I forgot about the moment of silence!

MrsSinner402 · January 2015

andrieya said:

angeltennis3 said:
Agreed on the weight threads...

My UO is I am ok with sleep training after six months, and depending on your child's temperament. Flame away, but all of my family members have done some form of sleep training starting at six months and they all have healthy, happy kids who are excellent sleepers.

Also, sleep training does not have to equal CIO.
I'm okay with cry it out and will be okay starting it when I think LO is ready. I can't stand when people get all judgey about that one!

I've had this quoted since 2:09 due to the Moment of Silence, but when do you consider LO to be "ready"? As far as I'm concerned, when she's a toddler and legitimately crying and throwing a fit for no reason other than being crabby and tired, then I'll let her CIO. But when she's a baby? Absolutely not. She needs something. Whether its food, or just some mom snuggles, babies cry for a reason. So consider me being judgey. My judgey pants are totally on for this one. I may even be wearing my judgey hat and matching shoes.

MuffinMom14 · January 2015

MonstoMommy said:

crawford411 said:

I think it's perfectly fine to talk about weight on the board as long as people are respectful about it. I know it is a sensitive area for a lot of people, but it's not for everyone. There will always be things that trigger insecurities, buy I don't think they need to be avoided by everyone because they bother some people.

I agree, especially if it is a thread that is clearly titled as being about weight. If you don't want to talk about weight, don't enter the thread then. It does kind of suck when you are trying to avoid talking about it or it is a trigger and it just pops up in some other thread.

Yeah. This is what I do. I'm dealing with my own shit, so I just don't click the thread. People can discuss it all they want, though. I'm a big girl. (I didn't mean that to sort of be a pun, I swear)

I got CHEWED ON my first day back. I said to a new person "I'm Purp, I didn't used to be fat, but I had a baby." I used to say, before I left "I'm Purp. I'm not fat, I'm pregnant." I really only did it for the humor, and a woman who is bigger than me CHEWED on me (she probably should have done it).

I was so shocked that she laid into me (I really like her, and she apologized for it later, which was unnecessary) that I didn't get to say what I should have, which was "I deserve that--and while I believe I can have whatever opinion about my own body that I want, and I am allowed to not be pleased with my own body, now that I have a daughter, I need to focus on the good things about my body, and I need to be mindful of the words I use to describe it."

I'm glad she called me on my shit. It's going to be hard to break this mentality. But I feel very strongly that I need to do it.

I just said today that, while I'm sad I have 19 more pounds to lose, I'd choose that over not being able to run. What I mean is--sure, I didn't drop the weight overnight like some moms do. BUT. My return to running distances was SWIFT. I mean. After 12 weeks pregnant, I rarely ran over 3 miles, because of the pain in my groin. I thought I'd have a slow return to distance. I could, at this point, run a half marathon. I've been running 8-milers for a few weeks now. Sure, it's not as easy as it was, but it's comfortable.

And in that respect, I'm SO happy and proud of my body. And, even though this is fucking cliche, my kid is amazing, and she's worth every pound I may or may never lose.

golfingdarwinfish said:

Sometimes I am shocked at the things that are not flamed here (or even get a reaction) that would 150% be flamed elsewhere.

Right. I'm just saying, The Knot boards wouldn't tolerate some of this shit. And no, I don't think that means we are "doing it wrong," but I do think that means we suffer some consequences. Like. People are scared to speak their minds. I swallow a lot of shit I'd normally say. Moreso if it's a reg. I was more likely to say to Emerald yesterday "oh, it's fine," when in reality, I sorta don't think it's fine, and I sorta DO think I was right (but that's the thing with opinions). I'm over it, and I will move on. I'm not going to hold grudges or whatnot. I'm just probably not going to seek opinions on some things from her as much, because we are very, very different parents. So, her opinions about things I do will likely be negative, and I'm not going to let that bother me. As with anything, I'd consider what she says, but I'd remember that we have different parenting styles, so I shouldn't get upset if we don't agree.

It just would have been debated more if I felt the board as a whole were open to disagreements. That's on me, too, because I am guilty of it. And I need to say that I don't WANT this board to be like some of The Knot boards. I was never comfortable enough to be a reg over there.

But, an example is, FFF meant Flame Freely Friday. You flamed OTHER PEOPLE for shit they said during the week. Not yourself. I held my breath every Friday, sure, scared I'd be called out, but in some ways, it was fine, because it aired out people's grievances with each other. I don't really want to do that on this board, but it's just an example of how it was generally expected that someone would call you on your shit if you didn't watch yourself.

I realize that means, as a reg, I get away with shit, but I'd be ok if someone called me on some stuff. I mean. Really. I'd be fine. I'm the first person to admit I'm not perfect. Not even close.

scottysgirl77 said:

I don't understand why there needs to be 2 Breastfeeding announcements. Can we link the old one into the new one and unsticky it? I am so happy for everyone that is able to Breastfeed. But it really sucks to not be able to and have so many reminders of it.

Yeah. And one of my UO's was going to be that I'm sick of BREAST IS BEST. I get it. I shouldn't feel the need to tell my story every time I explain that I'm FF.

AND. I'm sick of hearing "YOUR BODY WILL PROVIDE WHAT THE BABY NEEDS." This is not always true. If I didn't supplement, my baby would be dead by now. I 100% did EVERYTHING I could. I was in constant communication with the head of the nursery staff at the hospital and the lactation person (phone calls from the lactation person every night). I took supplements. I did all the pumping strategies. There is, as far as I know, not one thing I didn't try. My body did NOT provide what my baby needed. Not even close. So, the lactavists can stop saying that any day now, because it makes us with loser boobs feel like asshole child abusers.

MuffinMom14 · January 2015

UO: Bedsharing is 100% not for me. If a kid is sick or scared and needs to sleep in our bed, that is one thing. I even don't mind, I suppose, if someone bedshares with a baby (again, not for me) if they want to assume any possible risks that come with it. But, I believe that at a certain age, kids don't regularly sleep in adults beds. My BIL said at one point that his stepson ends up in bed with him and his wife every night. This was before they were even married. He's only been with this woman for about 2 years (it was a year ago when he said it). So, this kid was crawling into bed with his mom and her boyfriend. Sure, their situation is different, and I'd feel slightly better about it if they were his parents, but. He was 7 at the time. He needs to sleep in his bed.

MuffinMom14 · January 2015

UO: Homeschooling is also 100% not for me. My cousin has 5 kids (that's another story) and homeschools. Her kids are extremely socially backwards. I see in MYSELF what happened to me just from not being in activities (dance, sports, classes). I can't IMAGINE how socially awkward I'd be if I didn't go to public school. If homeschooling is done right, with activities outside the house, taught by a qualified parent, etc., it's not as big of a deal, but I still believe that children should be taught by someone other than their parent, and they should do so outside of the home.

MuffinMom14 · January 2015

UO: I believe that children can be TOO ATTACHED to their parents. And vice versa. I'm a mom now. I love my daughter. But she is not my entire world. If something were to happen to her, I don't know how I would go on. I feel like I'd rather die than have something happen to her. But. I still have other interests besides just her. I'm not JUST A MOM. And I think if she knows that, she will respect me more later on. And I'll be a better mom. It took half of a work day for me to realize this about myself

MuffinMom14 · January 2015

Thus concludes the UOs I've been working on since 2:07pm.

bumpuser10309732 · January 2015

SPurp13 said:

UO: I believe that children can be TOO ATTACHED to their parents. And vice versa. I'm a mom now. I love my daughter. But she is not my entire world. If something were to happen to her, I don't know how I would go on. I feel like I'd rather die than have something happen to her. But. I still have other interests besides just her. I'm not JUST A MOM. And I think if she knows that, she will respect me more later on. And I'll be a better mom. It took half of a work day for me to realize this about myself

I agree. It's healthy for both of you if you trust other people to watch your kid and if they bond with other people. But FUCK it makes me jealous. Haha

bumpuser10309732 · January 2015

MrsSinner402 said:

Agreed on the weight threads... My UO is I am ok with sleep training after six months, and depending on your child's temperament. Flame away, but all of my family members have done some form of sleep training starting at six months and they all have healthy, happy kids who are excellent sleepers. Also, sleep training does not have to equal CIO.
I'm okay with cry it out and will be okay starting it when I think LO is ready. I can't stand when people get all judgey about that one!
I've had this quoted since 2:09 due to the Moment of Silence, but when do you consider LO to be "ready"? As far as I'm concerned, when she's a toddler and legitimately crying and throwing a fit for no reason other than being crabby and tired, then I'll let her CIO. But when she's a baby? Absolutely not. She needs something. Whether its food, or just some mom snuggles, babies cry for a reason. So consider me being judgey. My judgey pants are totally on for this one. I may even be wearing my judgey hat and matching shoes.

I think we're wearing matching judgey outfits

Saragoeswest · January 2015

SPurp13 said:
UO: I believe that children can be TOO ATTACHED to their parents. And vice versa. I'm a mom now. I love my daughter. But she is not my entire world. If something were to happen to her, I don't know how I would go on. I feel like I'd rather die than have something happen to her. But. I still have other interests besides just her. I'm not JUST A MOM. And I think if she knows that, she will respect me more later on. And I'll be a better mom. It took half of a work day for me to realize this about myself

Attachment Parenting doesn't have anything to do with not having an identity outside of being a parent.

Raesofsunshine1 · January 2015

Im so proud of those that remembered not to hit post after typing their UO in the moment of silence. That was totally my intention. But habit. :-<

MuffinMom14 · January 2015

MrsBabe614 said:

SPurp13 said:

UO: I believe that children can be TOO ATTACHED to their parents. And vice versa. I'm a mom now. I love my daughter. But she is not my entire world. If something were to happen to her, I don't know how I would go on. I feel like I'd rather die than have something happen to her. But. I still have other interests besides just her. I'm not JUST A MOM. And I think if she knows that, she will respect me more later on. And I'll be a better mom. It took half of a work day for me to realize this about myself

I agree. It's healthy for both of you if you trust other people to watch your kid and if they bond with other people. But FUCK it makes me jealous. Haha

Oh my GOD, I know. I'm so lucky to have my MIL to take care of my baby, and she is just beside herself with love for APurp. But I want APurp to just scream for mommy once in a while. Would that be too hard, APurp? Asshole, baby? Stop being so fucking agreeable to everyone in the world but me.

MuffinMom14 · January 2015

Saragoeswest said:

UO: I believe that children can be TOO ATTACHED to their parents. And vice versa. I'm a mom now. I love my daughter. But she is not my entire world. If something were to happen to her, I don't know how I would go on. I feel like I'd rather die than have something happen to her. But. I still have other interests besides just her. I'm not JUST A MOM. And I think if she knows that, she will respect me more later on. And I'll be a better mom. It took half of a work day for me to realize this about myself

Attachment Parenting doesn't have anything to do with not having an identity outside of being a parent.

I didn't say anything about Attachment Parenting. I don't even know much of anything about it, other than it's "a thing."

swizz09 · January 2015

SPurp13 said:
UO: Homeschooling is also 100% not for me. My cousin has 5 kids (that's another story) and homeschools. Her kids are extremely socially backwards. I see in MYSELF what happened to me just from not being in activities (dance, sports, classes). I can't IMAGINE how socially awkward I'd be if I didn't go to public school. If homeschooling is done right, with activities outside the house, taught by a qualified parent, etc., it's not as big of a deal, but I still believe that children should be taught by someone other than their parent, and they should do so outside of the home.

I 100% agree with this. My 2 of my SILs homeschool. One is an amazing mom whos kids are well adjusted and it works awesome. She is involved in homeschooling groups and other social events.

My other SIL has 4 kids 10 and under. They are the biggest assholes ever. The second oldest won't even say hi to us he just blatantly ignored us (it is most certainly not a shy issue). If these kids spent 1 DAY in a public school they would have their butts handed to them....

Saragoeswest · January 2015

SPurp13 said:

Saragoeswest said:

SPurp13 said:
UO: I believe that children can be TOO ATTACHED to their parents. And vice versa. I'm a mom now. I love my daughter. But she is not my entire world. If something were to happen to her, I don't know how I would go on. I feel like I'd rather die than have something happen to her. But. I still have other interests besides just her. I'm not JUST A MOM. And I think if she knows that, she will respect me more later on. And I'll be a better mom. It took half of a work day for me to realize this about myself

Attachment Parenting doesn't have anything to do with not having an identity outside of being a parent.

I didn't say anything about Attachment Parenting. I don't even know much of anything about it, other than it's "a thing."

Okay. I just assumed that's what you were talking about because of the wording.

Raesofsunshine1 · January 2015

MrsSinner402 said:

andrieya said:

angeltennis3 said:
Agreed on the weight threads...

My UO is I am ok with sleep training after six months, and depending on your child's temperament. Flame away, but all of my family members have done some form of sleep training starting at six months and they all have healthy, happy kids who are excellent sleepers.

Also, sleep training does not have to equal CIO.
I'm okay with cry it out and will be okay starting it when I think LO is ready. I can't stand when people get all judgey about that one!
I've had this quoted since 2:09 due to the Moment of Silence, but when do you consider LO to be "ready"? As far as I'm concerned, when she's a toddler and legitimately crying and throwing a fit for no reason other than being crabby and tired, then I'll let her CIO. But when she's a baby? Absolutely not. She needs something. Whether its food, or just some mom snuggles, babies cry for a reason. So consider me being judgey. My judgey pants are totally on for this one. I may even be wearing my judgey hat and matching shoes.

We started after we tried seemingly every other possible method. We were at our wits end and completely exhausted. I would always offer a bottle and if she didnt want it, go through the other options like dirty diaper or whatever. Most of the time she would fall asleep when we picked her up but would wake up when we put her down.

I let her CIO after I tried everything I knew. If she was safe, not hungry and not dirty I didnt know what else to do. I would start in short amount of times. Let her cry 5 minutes and check on her but not pick her up. Just pat her on the back and let her know I was there.

CIO doesnt mean letting your kid starve or sit in poop. Most of the time when she would cry I would be in the other room watching her on the monitor.

To each their own, but we can check back in a few months when some babies still wont sleep long stretches and you are exhausted. Then we can talk.

MuffinMom14 · January 2015

swizz09 said:

UO: Homeschooling is also 100% not for me. My cousin has 5 kids (that's another story) and homeschools. Her kids are extremely socially backwards. I see in MYSELF what happened to me just from not being in activities (dance, sports, classes). I can't IMAGINE how socially awkward I'd be if I didn't go to public school. If homeschooling is done right, with activities outside the house, taught by a qualified parent, etc., it's not as big of a deal, but I still believe that children should be taught by someone other than their parent, and they should do so outside of the home.

I 100% agree with this. My 2 of my SILs homeschool. One is an amazing mom whos kids are well adjusted and it works awesome. She is involved in homeschooling groups and other social events. My other SIL has 4 kids 10 and under. They are the biggest assholes ever. The second oldest won't even say hi to us he just blatantly ignored us (it is most certainly not a shy issue). If these kids spent 1 DAY in a public school they would have their butts handed to them....

I have less of an issue if the parent who homeschools is qualified to teach. But it seems like many aren't. Like. WHUT. There's no way I could teach my kids better than public schools. They would get an awful education.

So, if the parent IS a teacher and is qualified, it does make matters better, but I think, for most kids, it would be more effective if kids were taught by someone other than mom or dad, and somewhere other than their home. But, I say that as someone who doesn't have a desire to ever work from home. Because I myself need separation of home and work. So, I just assume kids would need that same separation, but maybe not everyone does.

pnwlover12 · January 2015

angeltennis3 said:

pnwlover12 said:
I don't think anyone should have to walk on eggshells regarding words they use to describe their weight or how they feel. As long as you aren't purposefully dissing someone, i.e., "pnwlovers ass is so disgusting" making comments about yourself shouldn't be a big deal. Like, if I say, when I do jumping jacks, my fat flops around in the wind, I don't think anyone else should get butt hurt because their fat also flaps in the wind. Own it.
I think there is a big difference between saying "my fat flops around in the wind" and saying "my fat flops around in the wind and it is the most disgusting thing on the planet". Own your body but I think it is just common courtesy in language used around body Image. But to each their own!

I am just glad it's an interesting UO today because they have been kind of dull UO that are really popular opinions lately!

Nicb13 said:

MrsSinner402 said:

andrieya said:

angeltennis3 said:
Agreed on the weight threads...

My UO is I am ok with sleep training after six months, and depending on your child's temperament. Flame away, but all of my family members have done some form of sleep training starting at six months and they all have healthy, happy kids who are excellent sleepers.

Also, sleep training does not have to equal CIO.
I'm okay with cry it out and will be okay starting it when I think LO is ready. I can't stand when people get all judgey about that one!
I've had this quoted since 2:09 due to the Moment of Silence, but when do you consider LO to be "ready"? As far as I'm concerned, when she's a toddler and legitimately crying and throwing a fit for no reason other than being crabby and tired, then I'll let her CIO. But when she's a baby? Absolutely not. She needs something. Whether its food, or just some mom snuggles, babies cry for a reason. So consider me being judgey. My judgey pants are totally on for this one. I may even be wearing my judgey hat and matching shoes.

I'm not trying to change your mind but you haven't been there yet, so you don't know what you'll end up doing. Sure, your LO STTN right now, and luckily mine does too but one day a few months from now they might not. Regressions happen and when your baby is full, has a clean diaper and is just crying from exhaustion and needs to sleep, there are only so many times you can go into their room to soothe them or "cuddle". Yes, I love to cuddle DD and do everything I can for her when she's crying but it's a whole different ball game when they are a bit older, and if you want to soothe them every time they wake and want you, then go for it. You might have a lot of sleepless nights though.

Older babies will wake up in the night and just want mom or dad and if you are down for that multiple times a night then cool. I was not with DS. I like sleep and he's just fine now

To clarify, I don't agree with leaving your baby to cry for 45 minutes or an hour or anything crazy like that but I am not opposed to a little bit of crying because I DON'T think it scars them for life.

All of this. Well said @Nicb13‌.

I'll throw in a "just you wait!" For good measure.

MuffinMom14 · January 2015

Nicb13 said:

MrsSinner402 said:

Agreed on the weight threads... My UO is I am ok with sleep training after six months, and depending on your child's temperament. Flame away, but all of my family members have done some form of sleep training starting at six months and they all have healthy, happy kids who are excellent sleepers. Also, sleep training does not have to equal CIO.
I'm okay with cry it out and will be okay starting it when I think LO is ready. I can't stand when people get all judgey about that one!
I've had this quoted since 2:09 due to the Moment of Silence, but when do you consider LO to be "ready"? As far as I'm concerned, when she's a toddler and legitimately crying and throwing a fit for no reason other than being crabby and tired, then I'll let her CIO. But when she's a baby? Absolutely not. She needs something. Whether its food, or just some mom snuggles, babies cry for a reason. So consider me being judgey. My judgey pants are totally on for this one. I may even be wearing my judgey hat and matching shoes.

I'm not trying to change your mind but you haven't been there yet, so you don't know what you'll end up doing. Sure, your LO STTN right now, and luckily mine does too but one day a few months from now they might not. Regressions happen and when your baby is full, has a clean diaper and is just crying from exhaustion and needs to sleep, there are only so many times you can go into their room to soothe them or "cuddle". Yes, I love to cuddle DD and do everything I can for her when she's crying but it's a whole different ball game when they are a bit older, and if you want to soothe them every time they wake and want you, then go for it. You might have a lot of sleepless nights though.
Older babies will wake up in the night and just want mom or dad and if you are down for that multiple times a night then cool. I was not with DS. I like sleep and he's just fine now
To clarify, I don't agree with leaving your baby to cry for 45 minutes or an hour or anything crazy like that but I am not opposed to a little bit of crying because I DON'T think it scars them for life.

I think my other UO (apparently I'm just FILLED with opinions today) was that I believe babies DO need to learn to self soothe. Not in any dramatic way. I mean, like, figuring out that sucking on her hands feels good and she likes to do that, or popping the binky in helps her to sleep, so she does that for herself. It makes sense to me. Nothing nuts like "THE BABY HAS TO FIGURE OUT THE WORLD IS A HARD PLACE, SO I'M LETTING HER CRY FOR 8 HOURS." Because, quite frankly, it's all I can do to listen to her cry on my way to get to her from the kitchen to the living room if she starts. Even if APurp were my least favorite person on the planet earth, I'd still do everything I could to make her stop crying, because JESUS, kid. It's the worst sound in the world.

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