my new journey

candlequeen · January 2015

Drum roll please..........

I'm going to be a SAHM!!!!! well...most of the time. I enrolled in two classes b/c I have decided to become a nurse! C will stay in Pre-K where he is b/c he loves it and it's free b/c it's state funded. The two H's will go to an in home daycare on Mondays and Wednesdays for about 4 hours while I'm in class. Please pray for me and send good thoughts b/c I'm one of those people that likes to work (and I like to have break from my kids

) I talked to my boss today and the hours decreasing plus paying child care would be pointless to work. We would save more money if I SAH after my classes are over and the other three days of the week. Here are a few questions for SAHMs: Do you follow a schedule? I think my day would go quicker and easier if I had some sort of activities for Harper. Maybe even a schedule such as this time for art, this time for music/movement, this time for free play, etc...Keep lunch, snack, nap, and outside time the same each day provided that Henry cooperates? Or are you all snorting with laughter at the thought of this? LOL...also, how do you keep your DH/SO pleased when he walks in and sees a mess even though you took care of children all day? I'm sure I'll be able to clean during nap?! maybe maybe not? lol...sorry this was incredibly loooongggg! Here is a treat

candlequeen · January 2015

I heart you for being honest

Into+the+Kitty · January 2015

Ditto to no cleaning ever. We don't do a schedule, but I don't think it's ridiculous to have one either.

candlequeen · January 2015

the pre-K teacher in me wants the schedule

Into+the+Kitty · January 2015

It would probably be an easier transition for you and BH since I'm sure daycare had one.

flummadiddle85 · January 2015

Lol.... clean during nap. You're funny. G goes down, then I get V down, then G wakes up. There goes nap time. The only schedule we have around here would be for meals and V's one nap. Otherwise I just try to find some balance between getting stuff done around the house and giving the boys some non distracted attention. We didn't go anywhere today since I didn't want to, so we did some sensory play with died beans, and we played with baking soda and vinegar. V also loves helping bale and cook. Congrats and good luck!

candlequeen · January 2015

I guess I should give @stringy813 and @redrockmama some eye candy too but I don't know their types...I'll give it a shot

Rrrrrachel · January 2015

Re housework etc, just remember that you are both working all day.

candlequeen · January 2015

took me a while to get BH too! you know to me BM=bowel movement and BH=braxton hicks lol

DecafGrandeMocha · January 2015

This is so exciting! You'll never regret becoming a nurse

I'm learning how to be a SAHM myself right now after working as a RN (even though I'm usually on mobile, I should probably make a siggy instead of constantly saying how old L is...she's 3.5 months LOL) so I look forward to words of wisdom.

candlequeen · January 2015

DecafGrandeMocha said:

This is so exciting! You'll never regret becoming a nurse I'm learning how to be a SAHM myself right now after working as a RN (even though I'm usually on mobile, I should probably make a siggy instead of constantly saying how old L is...she's 3.5 months LOL) so I look forward to words of wisdom.

I really want to be an OB nurse! I'm worried about the hours though because of the kids. I might try a 9-5 job while they're young and do hospital when they get older...who knows?

TJ1979 · January 2015

If I end up SAH, I plan to go schedule all the way. My evenings are scheduled by the half hour. I couldn't handle any other way. If I didn't have a schedule, I would be sooo lazy.

candlequeen · January 2015

TJ1979 said:

If I end up SAH, I plan to go schedule all the way. My evenings are scheduled by the half hour. I couldn't handle any other way. If I didn't have a schedule, I would be sooo lazy.

this is what I'm afraid of...a friend of mine's husband made her sign a contract that basically said she would teach their 3 yr. old things instead of sitting around eating junk all day. Christian Grey anyone?!

BoothBaby · January 2015

Yay for staying home! I follow a nap and meal schedule, but Simon isn't really old enough for organized activities, so I just go with the flow and try to keep him entertained. It helps to get out of the house! One of the things I did a few months ago was join a local MOMS group. They have a calendar every month with 15-20 events, it is awesome to have all those options for Simon, and to be able to socialize with other moms at the same time!

candlequeen · January 2015

BoothBaby said:

Yay for staying home! I follow a nap and meal schedule, but Simon isn't really old enough for organized activities, so I just go with the flow and try to keep him entertained. It helps to get out of the house! One of the things I did a few months ago was join a local MOMS group. They have a calendar every month with 15-20 events, it is awesome to have all those options for Simon, and to be able to socialize with other moms at the same time!

yeah this is the reason I'm glad to have school twice a week...at least I'll get a little "real world" time lol

zaraceligon · January 2015

I do have a house cleaning schedule, for example Mondays is laundry day,and ether Saturday or Sunday will be a bathroom cleaning day,Tuesday and Thursday morning will be groceries shopping or spending time with my younger kid while my older kid is at school. Also nap time, is at two o'clock both of my kids are sleeping, as well me.sometimes we all sleep from two to five o'clock. Also mornings are for showers,right now, but usually on summer time are at night time. For wed morning or afternoon is to go for a walk and get some juice, and weekends of for all of us eating out and go to the park or to the zoo,or family stuffs. And crafting time sometimes during the weekend. And to keep your DH happy, he has to understand the having a toddler and more than one kid,means to have a messy house,most of the time. You also needs to make sure how much support he is going to give you when you are going to be at school. Nursing is not so easy you need to be focus,when you start doing practice, and if you are going to have lack of sleep,because of house cleaning and taking care of your kids it going to be very extreesfull, so my worse advise is for you to have someone to clean your house once in a while, and talk,talk talk, to your DH. Good luck and congrats, it will be hard but not impossible.

PipSqueak0313 · January 2015

I have a semi schedule - Monday PTOT, Tuesday ST, Wednesday Music class, Thursday ST then PTOT, Friday EI. Weekends work. Beyond that....just depends on weather, mood, etc. I try to keep meals and sleep at roughly the same time but I don't sweat it when it doesn't happen that way. As far as dh's expectations of me......let's just say he got a healthy dose of reality while taking care of ds2 while I was at work on a day when ds2 refused to be put down......I do try to do a minimum of a quick 5 minute toy pick up prior to his return so he doesn't trio on toys while entering the house. I also put ds in the pack n play for short periods while I run downstairs to switch out laundry, make meals, do a quick pick up of dishes, etc.

Into+the+Kitty · January 2015

I was so happy with J's paternity leave because he got a major taste of what I go through all day as a SAHP. He really never realized how much better A behaves for him BECAUSE he's not around her 24/7.

redrockmama · January 2015

Haha thanks for the special eye candy

And yay for getting to stay home, I wish I could...one of these days. I think a loose schedule can be helpful. I used to stay home with my niece and I wish I would have had things planned to do with her. I spent a lot of time trying to come up with ideas in the moment and wasted a lot of time that we could have been having fun and learning. I was young and dumb back then though.

flummadiddle85 · January 2015

ovenrack said:

Congratulations! Very exciting!

We don't have a schedule, but I do keep a mental and physical arsenal of THINGS we can do in the house and out of the house if we need some excitement.

Like, I know when there are local free music classes at the library, and swim time at the pool a few towns over. And what days friends are usually free, and what days are good days to plan a visit to Dad at work.

We play with toys in the bathtub when we're not taking a bath (revolutionary!) or like flumma, maybe some other sensory play.

You have much more kid experience than I do, though, so if you have ideas for a specific schedule, I'd certainly go for it! I do try to keep lunch at about the same time daily, and naps, because he's pretty reliable about those.

EDIT: cleaning. Yeah, you sort of clean as you go (as much as you can) but do not try to tackle any projects unless you're a magician.

Lol. I tried to put Vs stuffed animals in the bathtub to play with. He just cried because they didn't belong there. And I do the same as far as just having various things to do around the house. With winter here, I've tried a little harder to have extra stuff ready, like the colored ice cubes for "painting", the sensory bin, other things i find online, since we can't just hang out outside forever.

PipSqueak0313 · January 2015

flummadiddle85 said:
Lol. I tried to put Vs stuffed animals in the bathtub to play with. He just cried because they didn't belong there. And I do the same as far as just having various things to do around the house. With winter here, I've tried a little harder to have extra stuff ready, like the colored ice cubes for "painting", the sensory bin, other things i find online, since we can't just hang out outside forever.

What is in this sensory bin you have?

flummadiddle85 · January 2015

I just put dried beans, or whatever else, in a bin/container of some sort. Maybe bury some pegs in there that go onto the pegboard, or puzzle pieces. Today I even hid a chocolate covered pretzel in it. Give him a spoon and he'll happily scoop the beans into an ice cube tray.or just sticking your hand in it feels cool. It eventually just turns into throw them everywhere, but I figured out today to set him up on top of a blanket to help gather them back up afterwards.

km_md · January 2015

That is so great CQ!! Enjoy being a SAHM and good luck with your schooling!

Rrrrrachel · January 2015

Happy hooligans on facebook is forever posting sensory bin ideas.

bumpuser9353653 · January 2015

How exciting CQ!

The only experience I have as a SAHM was my maternity leave over the summer when I had R and A for three months. I don't think I could handle it full time, but some days I wish I could. After all the arguments with hubs over dishes and laundry and blah blah blah, I would definitely say talking with your hubby is very important so you can set expectations and everyone is on the same page. Especially since you'll be going back to school on top of it all.

I truly hope things work out for you guys and you enjoy going back to school and spending more time with your littles. What a great new adventure! :-)

Kelly11235 · January 2015

Staying at home was one of the best decisions we made.

(I don't really go for half-naked guys or ladies, so how about this as eye candy, or eye dessert.)

freezorburn · January 2015

I think it already sounds like you have a great plan, and it's great that you will still be carving out time each week to work toward your personal goals. Congratulations on going back to school!

Before DS went to daycare we kept a loose schedule. We had a couple of Mom & Baby classes we went to each week, plus a part-time nanny came 2 days a week so I could get cleaning done or bills paid, or just take a shower or get a haircut. Never got anything done during naps because DS napped in the stroller while I walked the dog.

Other than that, I would just try to get us out the door after breakfast and either go to a park or museum. There was an occasional play date, or we would go to a Mom & Babies drop-in coffee in the neighborhood. A lot of our schedule was driven by needing to be someplace comfortable for nursing and napping.

As for the condition of the house -- DH knows that the only way it will be immaculate is if his mother lives with us, and that's not happening for a lot of reasons. We both do what we can. Before baby, it used to be that he would cook dinner and I would clean up, but now we've gotten better at either cleaning as we go or whoever is done with putting baby to bed/walking the dog first cleans up. It took a bit of communication for us to find a new balance, and it's ongoing.

haileyq · January 2015

Congrats! I'm an RN and it is such a fulfilling profession that I am very passionate about. I'm always happy to discuss it if you like

. That being said, the pre-reqs are tough and the nursing curriculum itself is super challenging and time consuming. Totally doable, but as you get further into it you and your family will be able to reevaluate your expectations for each other.

I'm very type A and like to have a schedule but once I had DS I really had to loosen the reigns. I felt like once I limited my work schedule to one day a week it actually got easier because I didn't have to try to be super woman day in and day out. I don't think a loose schedule is a bad idea if that's what works for you, especially if you're willing to go with the flow as needed.

MH is super amazing awesome and has not once ever complained about housework. He reiterates to me how important my contribution is to the family and how he would never risk messing that up by saying something snarky and getting stuck doing it himself!

I also joined a mom's group and the activities and social interaction for me has been a life saver. That being said I live 6 hours from where I grew up and have no social network here so that was part of the problem. My city also has a website listing activities for little kids so I always have fresh ideas of stuff to do. Not that I'm doing anything these days because damn it's cold out!

unaveragejane · January 2015

Yay for a new chapter, CQ! I completely understand wanting to keep a kind of schedule and planning activities. I was so happy when L started taking naps at semi-predictable intervals. Hopefully SO will understand that cleaning is hit or miss a lot of the time. Mine is just happy if we all survive the day intact.

Our routine looks like this: L wakes up. Feed and change him. N wakes up. Change him and we all go downstairs for bfast. We eat and I attempt to tidy up after. L is ready for a nap 1.5 to 2 hours after waking, so we all trip back upstairs. N plays in his room while I feed L and get him down for a nap. Then N and I have about a 45 minute window to ourselves. If we have errands to run, I get ready while N plays. Otherwise we work on cleaning a little. N's favorite activity ever is to run around while I vacuum, I kid you not. He asks me to do it every day, so we sweep a lot. When L wakes up, I bring him downstairs and feed him while N has a snack. We all play in the floor for a while until L gets restless. The I put him in the carrier or RNP so we can move around and do a bit more cleaning and any meal prep for dinner that I can do early. Two hours later, L needs another nap so we go upstairs again. Once L goes to sleep, I feed N lunch and we try to do something fun just for him (play dough, painting, build a fort, etc). Then N is ready for a nap around 1:00. I get him down and L usually wakes up in the meantime. I take him downstairs and feed him. I try to relax and watch a little tv until he gets restless. We play a bit and get a little more cleaning done. N usually wakes up right before MH gets home, and both boys hang out with their dad until I finish getting supper ready. Once I eat, L is usually ready to eat and go to bed. It takes at least an hour, sometimes two, to get the baby asleep for the night. If I'm still stuck in the nursery at 7:30, MH puts N down for bed; otherwise I do it while he washes dishes. Once N goes down, I try to finish my to-do list for the day, do my workout challenge, and take a shower.

welly01 · January 2015

Congrats! Good luck on your new adventure.

candlequeen · January 2015

unaveragejane said:
Yay for a new chapter, CQ! I completely understand wanting to keep a kind of schedule and planning activities. I was so happy when L started taking naps at semi-predictable intervals. Hopefully SO will understand that cleaning is hit or miss a lot of the time. Mine is just happy if we all survive the day intact.

Our routine looks like this: L wakes up. Feed and change him. N wakes up. Change him and we all go downstairs for bfast. We eat and I attempt to tidy up after. L is ready for a nap 1.5 to 2 hours after waking, so we all trip back upstairs. N plays in his room while I feed L and get him down for a nap. Then N and I have about a 45 minute window to ourselves. If we have errands to run, I get ready while N plays. Otherwise we work on cleaning a little. N's favorite activity ever is to run around while I vacuum, I kid you not. He asks me to do it every day, so we sweep a lot. When L wakes up, I bring him downstairs and feed him while N has a snack. We all play in the floor for a while until L gets restless. The I put him in the carrier or RNP so we can move around and do a bit more cleaning and any meal prep for dinner that I can do early. Two hours later, L needs another nap so we go upstairs again. Once L goes to sleep, I feed N lunch and we try to do something fun just for him (play dough, painting, build a fort, etc). Then N is ready for a nap around 1:00. I get him down and L usually wakes up in the meantime. I take him downstairs and feed him. I try to relax and watch a little tv until he gets restless. We play a bit and get a little more cleaning done. N usually wakes up right before MH gets home, and both boys hang out with their dad until I finish getting supper ready. Once I eat, L is usually ready to eat and go to bed. It takes at least an hour, sometimes two, to get the baby asleep for the night. If I'm still stuck in the nursery at 7:30, MH puts N down for bed; otherwise I do it while he washes dishes. Once N goes down, I try to finish my to-do list for the day, do my workout challenge, and take a shower.

Wow. This terrifies/excites me all at the same time. You're awesome

unaveragejane · January 2015

I never accomplish all that I planned, but having a plan keeps me moving and happy.

candlequeen · January 2015

And where the hell is @theultimatesak‌ ? I need to know what she does too!

candlequeen · January 2015

Chickypoo2468 said:

candlequeen said:

unaveragejane said:
Yay for a new chapter, CQ! I completely understand wanting to keep a kind of schedule and planning activities. I was so happy when L started taking naps at semi-predictable intervals. Hopefully SO will understand that cleaning is hit or miss a lot of the time. Mine is just happy if we all survive the day intact.

Our routine looks like this: L wakes up. Feed and change him. N wakes up. Change him and we all go downstairs for bfast. We eat and I attempt to tidy up after. L is ready for a nap 1.5 to 2 hours after waking, so we all trip back upstairs. N plays in his room while I feed L and get him down for a nap. Then N and I have about a 45 minute window to ourselves. If we have errands to run, I get ready while N plays. Otherwise we work on cleaning a little. N's favorite activity ever is to run around while I vacuum, I kid you not. He asks me to do it every day, so we sweep a lot. When L wakes up, I bring him downstairs and feed him while N has a snack. We all play in the floor for a while until L gets restless. The I put him in the carrier or RNP so we can move around and do a bit more cleaning and any meal prep for dinner that I can do early. Two hours later, L needs another nap so we go upstairs again. Once L goes to sleep, I feed N lunch and we try to do something fun just for him (play dough, painting, build a fort, etc). Then N is ready for a nap around 1:00. I get him down and L usually wakes up in the meantime. I take him downstairs and feed him. I try to relax and watch a little tv until he gets restless. We play a bit and get a little more cleaning done. N usually wakes up right before MH gets home, and both boys hang out with their dad until I finish getting supper ready. Once I eat, L is usually ready to eat and go to bed. It takes at least an hour, sometimes two, to get the baby asleep for the night. If I'm still stuck in the nursery at 7:30, MH puts N down for bed; otherwise I do it while he washes dishes. Once N goes down, I try to finish my to-do list for the day, do my workout challenge, and take a shower.
Wow. This terrifies/excites me all at the same time. You're awesome
We used to have a schedule. And then I had J.
Then we just got a new schedule and apparently winter has effed it all up.
The only reliable thing around here is bedtime. Unless D is home, bc then he lets S stay up. Which screws up the next morning. Which then screws up the whole day...

Do you still home school S?

nanabanana06 · January 2015

Go CQ! I am so not cut out to be a SAHM, but school is turning into the best decision I've ever made. Good luck and let me know if you need any help!

nanabanana06 · January 2015

Go CQ! I am so not cut out to be a SAHM, but school is turning into the best decision I've ever made. Good luck and let me know if you need any help!

stoneycakes · January 2015

charmingthemoon said:

I am so glad to hear you guys being realistic that being a SAHM is not full of time for everything. I always dream that I'd have so much more time and my life would be much more organized, but you guys keep me in line here. Thanks!

But seriously, CQ, if you're going to be in school, that's a lot of work, too. Congrats for taking them both on!

I often think of how much cleaner and more organized my house would be if I worked outside the home. LOL. I guess the grass is always greener.

violajack · January 2015

Our days look a lot like what @unaveragejane said, except for the fact that I either watch an hour of tv or just pass out right after the boys go to sleep, so I get zero done after their bed time. Then again, MH scrapes in the door just before it's time to eat dinner and I'm just so done by the end of the day.

ComeMai · January 2015

Congrats on your new adventures!

We don't have a set schedule, just a rough idea of what needs to be done each day. I try to get all of our errands and outside of the house stuff done right after breakfast when both girls are in a good mood. It makes it easier to get through grocery shopping, post office, etc without fighting or complaining kiddos. I let the girls watch TV while I grab a shower. We have regular activities, like going to the library on Mondays or going to the Aquarium. I try to keep up on dishes by cleaning up right after mealtimes. We keep the toys chaos under control by making sure everything is put away before tubby time each night. I don't worry about cleaning up toys during the day, since the girls will just get the same toys out again and again. If both girls don't help clean up, then they lose that toy privilege for the following day. Blocks left out = no blocks the following day. Both girls also love to "help" me vacuum and dust, so I can get some cleaning done during the day.

Remember, some days will just be about survival and that's okay. :-)

Guennie · January 2015

I am a SAHM and I do have a schedule but it's a *flexible* one. That is to say, we have a schedule for meals, snacks, nap times and bed time. We aren't involved in any outside activities and I don't try to schedule them at home, I just let her play and make sure I'm spending time encouraging learning. As far as cleaning goes, I get to it when/if I get to it. My h is part of the problem because he is very messy and doesn't clean up after himself. If he were to get upset with me for the house not being clean I think I would have to punch him in the face. You do the best you can.

I hope things work out for you, it's definitely an adjustment! Just try to remember there is no such thing as supermom and don't constantly compare yourself to anyone else. You'll figure out what works for you and your family.

CLLDLL · January 2015

TJ1979 said:
If I end up SAH, I plan to go schedule all the way. My evenings are scheduled by the half hour. I couldn't handle any other way. If I didn't have a schedule, I would be sooo lazy.

TJ you and I would get along so well, I think. This is me 100%!!

CQ- congrats on your decisions! I have no advice, but I'm sure you'll ffigure it out & do great!

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