I'm currently taking a time-out from my baby. She just gave me a titty-twister and I'm not happy.
My true FFFC... I've been judging people hard this week. Not anyone here, but people I know IRL. People who post pics of themselves wearing hardly any clothes, out partying for the third or fourth time in a week while someone else watches their kids.... judged.
My fffc is that dh is taking both kids to his moms for the day tomorrow so I can be alone and relax on my birthday. This may be the nicest gift anyone has ever got me.
I'm with @Miss Renee I have read research on both sides of CIO -- those that say babies can self sooth and the other that says baby's who bed share or don't CIO actual sleep better as toddlers bc of the confidence built by their parents always attending to their crys.
I know they're almost 2 separate things as you can do No CIO and not bed share.
No judgement on those who use CIO but for us, bed sharing is less crying and more snuggles which I prefer as a mom who works full time. I'll admit I miss her when she's in her crib. (Following all recommendations for safe bed sharing btw.)
I don't know what's right. We just do what feels most natural. At 3 am though everything tends to feel hellish.
Food related: I single handedly ate a whole bag of sweet onion Kettle chips last night.
I have one pumping bra and I think it's been washed once and I wear it every day and have been since i went back to work when she was 12 weeks OMG GROSS I know.
I'm with @Miss Renee
I have read research on both sides of CIO -- those that say babies can self sooth and the other that says baby's who bed share or don't CIO actual sleep better as toddlers bc of the confidence built by their parents always attending to their crys.
I know they're almost 2 separate things as you can do No CIO and not bed share.
No judgement on those who use CIO but for us, bed sharing is less crying and more snuggles which I prefer as a mom who works full time. I'll admit I miss her when she's in her crib. (Following all recommendations for safe bed sharing btw.)
No offense... no judgment (of course!)....
1) "I have read research on both sides of CIO " Even experts can't agree on potential detriments of CIO. You can find any research you want and hold onto it like gospel, but keep an open mind that you may be wrong.
2) "I know they're almost 2 separate things as you can do No CIO and not bed share" but I'm just going to lump them together anyways because fuck logic, right?
3) "No judgement on those who use CIO but for us, bed sharing is less crying and more snuggles which I prefer as a mom who works full time." Of course you also are also "Following all recommendations for safe bedsharing btw". Well thank Jesus. I'm really glad that you found a solution that works for you, you busy full time working mom you, that allows you and your family happiness and peace. Screw all the other moms out there just doing there best trying to do the same. If they're not doing it your way, they're doing it wrong amirite.
4) We STILL REMEMBER when you called us all bitches.
It must be nice living in Eggs Benedict's world and be able to just spew shit out with no thought to others.
I think CIO is cruel and I'll never be able to do it. No judgement on those who do because I'm still up every 1-2 hours every night while they're probably sleeping. I just can't do it.
And you... you suck too! Moms have enough on their plate without other moms saying their choices are "cruel".
Signed,
The twin mom who (works full time) and is just doing her damn best for her family and sanity
I used to judge moms a lot before I became one. Now I understand we're all just trying to get by with healthy kids who don't scream all the time. Whatever works for you: do it. Doesn't work? Stop.
Not going to engage in a back and forth fight here, but My post came from an internal struggle I have with MYSELF on whether to use CIO or not with MY kid.
I'm not passing judgement on others at all. Cheers to any mom out there doing whatever she choses for her own kid!
And I don't give a shit what the few of you who can't look past one post from months and months ago! I post and participate with the ladies on here who want to participate with me. Haters can go fly a fricki'n kite for all I care.
I apologized for making the crap comment and I meant it. I value this board and the women on it. Those with opinions the same and different than mine.
I'm not passing judgement. Believe if you'd like. I've considered trying CIO myself and follow the sleep easy thred. I'm just not able to commit to it myself bc I get super anxious when I try. Any judgent is aimed at myself; not anyone else. Others have their LOs sleeping in their cribs....I don't and can't decide on forcing the crib or figuring out safe bed sharing with an almost 7 mo who is about to crawl.
Not going to engage in a back and forth fight here, but My post came from an internal struggle I have with MYSELF on whether to use CIO or not with MY kid.
I'm not passing judgement on others at all. Cheers to any mom out there doing whatever she choses for her own kid!
And I don't give a shit what the few of you who can't look past one post from months and months ago! I post and participate with the ladies on here who want to participate with me. Haters can go fly a fricki'n kite for all I care.
These salty hoe's rarely let anything or anyone move on when they act like judgmental self-righteous douches. You would probably have a better chance with us if you put your tail between your legs and apologize and attempt to make things right, or just go away to another forum. Those who are participating with you more than likely are not the ladies who sat here through their pregnancies actually learning about each other or are ladies whoa are unaware of who you are. Thank you for showing us your colors in †his thread, proceed to insult us some more won't you?
Sooooo.... on another note.... you CAN judge me on this one:
1.ibate an entire box of velveeta mac and cheese by myself for supper on New Years Eve, ok I shared 2 noodles with P....
2. I still have a pumokin on my porch and it is falling apart.
I feel like I could eat a box of mac and cheese by myself right now.
FFFC: We are rehoming our cat. She was a rescue to begin with, and not the nicest of cats but we always swore we wouldn't re-home a pet because of kids. Between always biting me, destroying a few door frames and carpets, spitting her hair balls everywhere, and somehow getting poop on things, I have been done for a while. She went into the nursery, hid under the rocker and pooped which put DH over the edge. We simply can't giver her the attention she deserves and frankly we can't afford the cost of replacing the things she destroys (we don't own) and the medical bills I'm sure that would be coming along with her aging.
TL;DR DH and I have decided that someone who can love our cat and take better care of her deserves to have her. I'd rather her be loved and with someone who can take care of an aging cat than keep her with us because we don't want to be the couple who re-homes after having kids.
I haven't been around in a while - mostly lurking from time to time - but I can't quite help myself from posting on this one.
I simply cannot understand how someone can say in one breath that a parenting choice is "cruel" (there IS judgement in that description - you can't escape that - you measure cruelty by that which you feel is not cruel, it does not simply exist by itself as an objective designation) and in the next say you aren't judging that parenting choice. You don't have to choose that approach, you don't even have to agree with it, but you cannot lie to yourself and assert that you aren't judging. You are. There is no escaping it.
We have no set sleep system in place. Ya, I'm sure one could judge away about that too. But, people have to do what works for them-- be it cry it out or otherwise. Regardless, a parent loves their child no matter what sleep training program or lack of they use.
As a parent aren't there a lot of things that we do that seem mean/cruel depending on who you ask but its actually for their own good? CIO, bedtimes, making them eat their vegetables, immunizations? Although that list is according to my MIL of all the mean things I do to my kids
I can't imagine letting my baby watch TV. I can't put my finger on it--but maybe it seems irresponsible and lazy? At the same time, if I had a toddler and an infant maybe I would change my tune and let the toddler watch because I can imagine being extremely overwhelmed.
I know many of you do not like me on this board and would rather I just leave, but I am truest sorry if I offended or hurt anyone's feelings with my post about CIO. I went back and re-read my original post to see what I specifically wrote... I never said it was "cruel." I agreed with the prior post in regards to not being comfortable doing CIO myself. My point is that I never meant to offend anyone and I apologize if I did.
I think people make WAY too big a deal out of the TV thing. Our kids generations are going to grow up needing to use screens for everything school, life and work related. Even some soda dispensers are touch screen now. And most babies I know under 2 don't have nearly the attention span to sit through a whole show. Chill out.
@mrsmountainmama disagree! There's a difference between letting your child watch tv all day and letting then watch a few shows. Did you know that there are lots of educational things on specific childhood programs (music, counting, colors, relationships, etc)? Did you never watch Sesame Street as a kid? Honestly, saying it's lazy to let you child watch tv is IMO weird. Like @amackattack said media and technology are going to affect your child's life whether you approve or not.
It was just an unfortunate choice of words. There are many things that parents can do to be criticized as being lazy and irresponsible, I just don't see TV as being one of them. Ironically enough, I think that most parents take advantage of that time to do other things that need to get done that could take attention away from their LO.
DH says it best, the studies that involve TV and it being bad are the parents who literally use the TV all day and all night and use it as a babysitter 24/7. It is not bad to let your kids watch a little TV. That is from a doctor.
I can't imagine letting my baby watch TV. I can't put my finger on it--but maybe it seems irresponsible and lazy? At the same time, if I had a toddler and an infant maybe I would change my tune and let the toddler watch because I can imagine being extremely overwhelmed.
If I didn't recognize the avatar, I would call you a troll. I can't imagine a member of this board posting this, especially after the whole "CIO is cruel" convo.
I don't understand what is happening in this thread.
DH says it best, the studies that involve TV and it being bad are the parents who literally use the TV all day and all night and use it as a babysitter 24/7. It is not bad to let your kids watch a little TV. That is from a doctor.
I think Sid the science kid is a cute show! Also my LO loves sitting with his dad and watching football. Usually only for a few minuets, but it is nice to just take a moment of quiet.
I have been not enjoying chocolate as much as before. I even have been choosing the salty, buttery goodness of popcorn at the movies over chocolate. That's just crazy for me.
It was just an unfortunate choice of words. There are many things that parents can do to be criticized as being lazy and irresponsible, I just don't see TV as being one of them. Ironically enough, I think that most parents take advantage of that time to do other things that need to get done that could take attention away from their LO.
I think y'all are probably right...which is why I said I couldn't quite put my finger on my thoughts about it.
I can't imagine letting my baby watch TV. I can't put my finger on it--but maybe it seems irresponsible and lazy? At the same time, if I had a toddler and an infant maybe I would change my tune and let the toddler watch because I can imagine being extremely overwhelmed.
If I didn't recognize the avatar, I would call you a troll. I can't imagine a member of this board posting this, especially after the whole "CIO is cruel" convo.
I don't understand what is happening in this thread.
Well things have been a little slow lately...I thought it was a good FFFC to spice things up. Clearly I think y'all are great mamas and have taken so much of your advice over the last year.
I was irresponsible and lazy for at least 5 months when I let S watch the little mermaid on repeat so I could sleepervise while I was sick and exhausted during the first half of my pregnancy.
Re: FFFC
My true FFFC... I've been judging people hard this week. Not anyone here, but people I know IRL. People who post pics of themselves wearing hardly any clothes, out partying for the third or fourth time in a week while someone else watches their kids.... judged.
My fffc is that dh is taking both kids to his moms for the day tomorrow so I can be alone and relax on my birthday. This may be the nicest gift anyone has ever got me.
Married DH 7/30/11
CSC arrived 5/7/12
CHC arrived 6/2/14
I have read research on both sides of CIO -- those that say babies can self sooth and the other that says baby's who bed share or don't CIO actual sleep better as toddlers bc of the confidence built by their parents always attending to their crys.
I know they're almost 2 separate things as you can do No CIO and not bed share.
No judgement on those who use CIO but for us, bed sharing is less crying and more snuggles which I prefer as a mom who works full time. I'll admit I miss her when she's in her crib. (Following all recommendations for safe bed sharing btw.)
Married DH 7/30/11
CSC arrived 5/7/12
CHC arrived 6/2/14
Food related: I single handedly ate a whole bag of sweet onion Kettle chips last night.
I have one pumping bra and I think it's been washed once and I wear it every day and have been since i went back to work
when she was 12 weeks OMG GROSS I know.
I'm not passing judgement on others at all. Cheers to any mom out there doing whatever she choses for her own kid!
And I don't give a shit what the few of you who can't look past one post from months and months ago! I post and participate with the ladies on here who want to participate with me. Haters can go fly a fricki'n kite for all I care.
I'm not passing judgement. Believe if you'd like. I've considered trying CIO myself and follow the sleep easy thred. I'm just not able to commit to it myself bc I get super anxious when I try. Any judgent is aimed at myself; not anyone else. Others have their LOs sleeping in their cribs....I don't and can't decide on forcing the crib or figuring out safe bed sharing with an almost 7 mo who is about to crawl.
Engaged: 7/19/09 Married: 9/19/10

BFP: 10/14/13 EDD: 6/16/14 DD Arrived: 6/21/14
June '14 Siggy Challenge: Warm Places
BFP: February 2016 EDD: October 17, 2016
BFP: February 2016 EDD: October 17, 2016
BFP: February 2016 EDD: October 17, 2016
I simply cannot understand how someone can say in one breath that a parenting choice is "cruel" (there IS judgement in that description - you can't escape that - you measure cruelty by that which you feel is not cruel, it does not simply exist by itself as an objective designation) and in the next say you aren't judging that parenting choice. You don't have to choose that approach, you don't even have to agree with it, but you cannot lie to yourself and assert that you aren't judging. You are. There is no escaping it.
Married DH 7/30/11
CSC arrived 5/7/12
CHC arrived 6/2/14
If I didn't recognize the avatar, I would call you a troll. I can't imagine a member of this board posting this, especially after the whole "CIO is cruel" convo.
I don't understand what is happening in this thread.
Taymiller said:
Thank your DH. That is how I feel.If I didn't recognize the avatar, I would call you a troll. I can't imagine a member of this board posting this, especially after the whole "CIO is cruel" convo.
I don't understand what is happening in this thread.
Well things have been a little slow lately...I thought it was a good FFFC to spice things up. Clearly I think y'all are great mamas and have taken so much of your advice over the last year.