I love cigarettes

pearldove · January 2015

I have been trying so hard since I found out to quit smoking cigarettes and I went from a pack a day to like a puff or two off of two or three of my boy friends cigs throughout the day. I want so badly to stop but it's incredibly hard I had not exactly imagined myself getting pregnant and sadly never saw myself quitting tobacco. It's really hard because everyone I'm around all the time smokes including my boy friend. I know I'm doing way better but it scares me that it's going to effect the baby I know if I can stop soon it should be fine I'm 7 weeks and 6 days today and this is constantly on my mind.

neludelu · January 2015

Is this a serious post? I can't believe for one sec that this is for real.

Legrosc9 · January 2015

Talk to your doctor. I recently quit cold turkey and it was not easy but it's so worth it. I've read online that women should quite before the 14 weeks mark. Of course, sooner the better but take it day by day. Good luck

LilPez · January 2015

I know that smoking is an addiction, but you've got to value this baby's life enough to make you quit. My dad was the baby of a smoker during pregnancy (they didn't know better back then... Supposedly) and he has some very serious asthma issues. Please, for the love of your baby, stop smoking, even the 1-2 puffs. Your baby is so much more important then that.

llw42614 · January 2015

I quit cold turkey the day of my BFP after 5 years of smoking. The health of my child is way more important than my "love" for cigarettes. My husband also respects us enough not to smoke in my presence or even around our home (since 2nd hand smoke is just as harmful).
Rule #1 of becoming a parent-- it's not about you anymore.

elizabetheleven · January 2015

neludelu said:
Is this a serious post? I can't believe for one sec that this is for real.

How can you not believe this? I smoked a lot before finding out. Chill with the judgement.

@Pearldove I was lucky to have an aversion to smokes almost immediately. So quitting wasn't an issue.

I would ask your bf to stop smoking around you. Therefore you won't be as tempted.
Suck on some candies. Maybe even try an ecig when cravings get real bad.

Props to you for cutting back so drastically. And I wish you luck.

LilPez · January 2015

I feel like the title of this post is completely inappropriate, and makes light of the subject.

keenebride2015 · January 2015

I don't believe it makes light of any subject, and I'm a little disappointed in the judging and burning at the stake of this girl. I was faced with quitting after this unexpected pregnancy. It was tough, REALLY tough. You might want to look into state programs in your area for quitting smoking, talk to your doctor about your struggle, and call a nicotine support line if needed. You can do it. I promise, it's going to be hard, but it won't be hard forever. The first 4 days I wanted to murder anything that breathed, but then it started getting better. If you really don't feel like you can tackle this on your own, then speak with your doctor about the patch or the gum. While it's still not great for your baby, it is able to gently wean you off your addiction. And no matter what, a patch doesn't have the thousands of toxic chemicals that traditional cigarettes do. Good luck, momma.

lelesmom · January 2015

I think this is a completely appropriate subject. We're all here for support and advice while pregnant. And I've been a smoker for 5 years now and with DD I quit the second I found out but with this pregnancy it really was so much harder for me but I did it!!! I bought a ton of suckers and jolly ranchers. I even was super tempted today to buy a pack but my baby's life is so much more valuable to me than my habit!!! My sister smoked her entire pregnancy and her son had breathing problems as soon as he was born!! I really hope you can quit because I think the guilt would eat you alive! Good luck!

katers79 · January 2015

As a previous smoker, cigarettes gross me out more than anything right now. I quit cold turkey last NYE after smoking for YEARS. You can do it. Don't smoke in the house, and ask your bf to quit too. You need support, and he should do this for both you and the baby. GL.

AceBaby191 · January 2015

Pearldove - Read Allan Carr's Easy Way to Quit Smoking. You continue to smoke throughout the book, so it's not 'scary' to pick up. It helped me quit cold turkey after being a smoker for way too many years to admit.

It's not easy to quit, and it's not easy for non-smokers to understand what quitting is like. So ignore the harsh "eww gross, you're stupid" comments because people don't get it. It's not as easy as just not smoking, so hang in there and do the best you can, as quickly as you can. If the book is not an option, contact your doctor for support/cessation groups you can join. The main thing you need to do is find some support in quitting as soon as possible.

Last bit of advice - make it inconvenient for you and your BF! If you smoke at your house / on your patio. . . STOP. Don't keep them inside, and make it a hassle to get to them. You can do this!!

LilPez · January 2015

I'm not trying to be judgy, I thought I was very kind in my post. I do, however feel that the title would be more appropriate if it were something along the lines of "advice for quitting" or something if the like. Obviously OP can post what she wants, I just personally feel it makes it seem like cigarettes are more important to her then anything else. I guess that's just the way I interpreted it.

lelesmom · January 2015

@LilPez‌ I do agree. The title is a bit inappropriate but I love them too but just don't love what they do to my body and my child.... Yes maybe a title of "advice to quit" would be better!

AceBaby191 · January 2015

LilPez said:

I'm not trying to be judgy, I thought I was very kind in my post. I do, however feel that the title would be more appropriate if it were something along the lines of "advice for quitting" or something if the like. Obviously OP can post what she wants, I just personally feel it makes it seem like cigarettes are more important to her then anything else. I guess that's just the way I interpreted it.

Guess so.

kamarks08 · January 2015

neludelu said:
Is this a serious post? I can't believe for one sec that this is for real.

Why? Because she admits to having difficulty quitting?

There is a bit of judgement going on here. And I don't WK, it's not my thing, but damn.

I never smoked, but depending on the use, it can be an addiction. OP good for you for cutting back, but you really need to cut it out. Completely. Please seek help in your area. As PP said, it's not about you anymore, and it can be done.

Also, second hand smoke is harmful. I probably don't even need to say that, but still. The health of your newborn can be heavily (negatively) impacted by your use / second hand inhalation.

Good luck to you, honestly.

mosdub · January 2015

pearldove said:

I have been trying so hard since I found out to quit smoking cigarettes and I went from a pack a day to like a puff or two off of two or three of my boy friends cigs throughout the day. I want so badly to stop but it's incredibly hard I had not exactly imagined myself getting pregnant and sadly never saw myself quitting tobacco. It's really hard because everyone I'm around all the time smokes including my boy friend. I know I'm doing way better but it scares me that it's going to effect the baby I know if I can stop soon it should be fine I'm 7 weeks and 6 days today and this is constantly on my mind.

Good for you for cutting back as much as you have, it is a hard habit to quit, especially when you enjoy it so much. You should have every right to request that your bf and friends smoke outside of the home (if they don't already) as second hand smoke is dangerous as well. Besides, being physically away from them smoking will be helpful for you to avoid the desire to want it.

Try replacing the action of smoking with another activity - sucking on a flavored toothpick, chewing on a cinnamon stick, etc.

If you need to remind yourself of why smoking during pregnancy is so bad, read up on what the CDC has to say: https://www.cdc.gov/reproductivehealth/tobaccousepregnancy/

melsner · January 2015

I loved cigarettes too. It's how she is feeling right now, and she has a right to express that. At least she's asking for help.

I had quit cigs awhile ago, then I had a relapse. I then switched to an ecig. When I found out I was pregnant, I immediately dumped my nicotine e juice and bought a 0 nicotine juice. I puffed on that occasionally for about a week when i got bad cravings and now I'm off it all. It was not easy, but it can be done. I strongly suggest you advise your bf not to smoke in front of you. No smoking in the house or in the car. Talk to your doctor about the problem and see if he has any recommendations. It's great you reduced as much as you did. If you can do that much, I know you can quit entirely.

mosdub · January 2015

aeryfaery said:

Also, you might want to talk about your boyfriend quitting completely as well, especially if he's going to be a major part of baby's life. Cigarette smoke CLINGS. It's great if he smokes outside, but its still going to effect your baby when he holds her/him.

Plus it helps to quit with someone who is going through the same thing.

Also, quitnet.com. <----super helpful forums that really helped when I was quitting.

I just watched a video about quitting during pregnancy here, and I never knew that the advice was to refrain from holding a baby for an hour after you have smoked - for real?!

pearldove · January 2015

@mosdub‌ Thank you I really do want to stop it's more than a serious post I was wanting to be able to talk to people who have been or are in the same situation. I have asked him to quit but he is really stressed and can't seem to do it he tried and has had a hard time cutting back from even the one pack a day. All my friends smoke at least a pack a day and constantly being around people smoking is more than just difficult for me. I'm 19 and I've smoked since I was 12 so 7 years and the only reason I am trying so hard is because I am pregnant I plan on fully quitting but it's hard to do! If I had not gotten pregnant I would not be quitting at all. But I do want to do this for my babies health. I've tried candies, and knitting even just holding an unlit cigarette and the have seemed to help a bit but I still have the urge when I see someone or smell it

pearldove · January 2015

@aeryfaery‌ I would love him to...he's not very found of the idea and has tried but not very successful at all. And he knows all the health effects as well:/

LilPez · January 2015

^ you can do it! Once you hold that beautiful baby in your arms, you'll realize how worth it the struggle was. Good luck to you, I hope you can find some of the posts above with links, as helpful

kcebeling · January 2015

My husband used to smoke and watching him quit (repeatedly) showed me how intense the addiction is. Just know that YOU CAN DO IT! We don't know one another, but I'm cheering for you, Lady!

pearldove · January 2015

Thank you so much @melsner‌
I know I can as well he doesn't smoke inside but he does in the car I've been talking to him a lot but it seems to piss him off...

AceBaby191 · January 2015

Okay, so since you're around it so much, it's going to be a little more difficult, perhaps. However, you totally deserve to make some ground rules that people have to follow or they are complete dicks.

1. Absolutely no smoking indoors in your home. None.

2. Refrain from smoking in your car, and/or cars you frequently ride in. At the very least, no smoking while you're in the car.

3. If you live with your bf, smokes stay in the car and don't come inside. Make it more difficult for both of you to have access to them. This is a good one for both you, and Mr. I-can't-smoke-less-than-20-cigs-a-day!!

As far as being a smoker for 7 years. . . that's an excuse, and you've got to knock it off. I smoked for 15+ years and I was able to quit, so leave that one behind. Also "If I had not gotten pregnant, I would not be quitting". . . well, guess what. . . you did. So drop that line too. You can totally quit, you just have to stop making excuses and start looking at the positives instead of the "negatives" about quitting.

Good luck, and there's my tough love for you

You've got this!!

pearldove · January 2015

And I'm sorry about the title I suppose I could have chosen something else like need advise on quitting and I apologize for that idk if I can change it or not though..

AceBaby191 · January 2015

pearldove said:

And I'm sorry about the title I suppose I could have chosen something else like need advise on quitting and I apologize for that idk if I can change it or not though..

I personally love the title, and I hope you don't change it. It's funny and it makes me laugh every time I see it. Believe me, if someone posted "I love sushi" as a title for having a hard time giving up ahi tuna, there wouldn't be complaints. You do you, girl.

pearldove · January 2015

I really appreciate all the support and positive post thank you all and even the not as nice post I know this isn't good. It's cause uh me anxiety about it as well.. I suppose I'll talk to my doctor it's gotten way better I was just hoping I was strong enough to do it with out help I suppose...

emmiemae08 · January 2015

I completely understand your frustration and I honestly wanted to post something similar but feared responses. Thank you for being able to put the issue out there. I too struggle but feel that I am doing better each day. I'll be talking to my doctor about her suggestions on thursday and if you still are looking for help then please let me know and I'll tell you what my doctor suggests. Kudos to you for being able to cut back so much and fingers crossed that you will be able to quit completely.

Ampaints · January 2015

Have you shown your boyfriend the information on what smoking, even second hand, can do to your baby? It's his child to and he needs to start keeping it's best interest at heart also. I'm another former smoker and am very lucky that I could quit easily. It was much harder for my husband, but he's quit for 8.5 years now. I hope you find something that works for you both and soon!

AceBaby191 · January 2015

aeryfaery said:

AceBaby191 said:

pearldove said:

And I'm sorry about the title I suppose I could have chosen something else like need advise on quitting and I apologize for that idk if I can change it or not though..

I personally love the title, and I hope you don't change it. It's funny and it makes me laugh every time I see it. Believe me, if someone posted "I love sushi" as a title for having a hard time giving up ahi tuna, there wouldn't be complaints. You do you, girl.

Seriously side-eyeing you.

Oh come on. . . it's funny! Unintentionally funny, and OP already admitted it probably should have been something more serious, but it is what it is. Sure got people to read it, right?

lelesmom · January 2015

And just fyi even when you quit for good it is going to be a constant battle not to smoke! My entire family smokes and I LOVE to be around them but when they all go outside to smoke I stay inside and play with my nieces and nephews. And no one ever told me how hard it'd be even after I quit. I was 9 months pregnant telling myself no no no no smoking everyday!! It's tough, very tough, but I was extremely proud by the end to say I quit cold turkey right away!

divinemsbee · January 2015

I'm really rooting for you. I'm not a smoker, never have been, but my dad is one (since he was 16, so roughly 45 years). I nth talking to your doctor and seeing if there are any state smoking cessation classes or programs available (I know there are in MS from that big tobacco lawsuit).

I get, especially for your BF, that right now the baby seems like a kind of ephemeral thing. It's not really real, yet. But think further than that. Think about even if he doesn't do any physical damage to your kid right now (and I'm a 'lucky' child of a smoker who has had minimal breathing issues), it's only going to get worse. Think about how, at your kid's wedding, you want to be able to walk across the floor without emitting a horrible hacking cough. And you don't want to look exhausted and not be able to do things like mow your own lawn because you physically can't handle it at the age of 60 when you should still be strong.

Think about your kid trying and trying to call you one night, getting more and more worried, only to find out that you had so much trouble breathing that you had to go to the ER the week before Christmas. And get diagnosed with COPD. And then catch pneumonia. And trying to talk to your child who lives far away while you're on the oxygen machine and have the nurses take the phone away because you can't talk to your child and breathe at the same time. That's what my siblings and I went through last Christmas and the fact that I constantly worry more about my 60 year old dad than I do my 92 year old grandmother is a sobering thing.

You can do this. For now and for later. And I hope your BF can too.

mosdub · January 2015

@divinemsbee I'm thankful for your input, and so sorry about your dad.

I also wanted to add that it would be wise to quit smoking all together. I lost a close family member to throat cancer and they were only in their 50s. It is no joke. I'm sure OP is already aware of this, but sometimes it doesn't seem real until you or someone you love experiences it.

gmd88 · January 2015

Hey there. I am 8 weeks 5 days and down to half a cigarette a day. I know it sounds silly but getting through the day is still tough. I had a visual in my head the other day which has motivated me... I thought about that smoking while pregnant really wasn't very different from passing a cigarette to my newborn. How disturbing. I'm working really hard and when I crave I picture holding the cigarette to my belly and feel awful. I know this all sounds a little nutty but it's how I feel about what I'm doing and it's helping me stop. God bless and good luck. You're not alone

stahlop · January 2015

Good luck on quitting. I was a smoker for over 12 years when I quit (I had a really bad cough for months from an illness so I physically couldn't smoke). My DH has quit several times and the Alan Carr book really helped him. He's been smoke free for over a year now. Good luck to you. I know how hard the cravings can be.

trudytudy · January 2015

Good luck! I hope you can quit for your baby's sake. Does it help to focus also on the fact that you can save a lot of money that you could put toward your baby?

pearldove · January 2015

You all really have encouraged me! I did have a puff off of two cigarettes through the day today but I'm going to do my very best not to have any tomorrow. I know how long term it can be really horrible my grandpa smoked for 47 years and 5 years after he quit he was diagnosed with emphesima he has to be on a breathing mechine for 30 minutes 6 times a day and takes 4 different medication. I don't know why but that has never really been motivation for me. Being pregnant is the most motivation I could ever have. I really appriciate the other moms that are having trouble quitting commenting!

LAF0926 · January 2015

llw42614 said:
I quit cold turkey the day of my BFP after 5 years of smoking. The health of my child is way more important than my "love" for cigarettes. My husband also respects us enough not to smoke in my presence or even around our home (since 2nd hand smoke is just as harmful).
Rule #1 of becoming a parent-- it's not about you anymore.

Same here. I quit for 4 years and went back when I was planning my wedding last year. We got married this September and when I got my BFP on 11/22 I quit for good.

LawnDog1216 · January 2015

72 hours after your last puff, the nicotine will be out of your system, and all that's left of addiction (whether you smoked a week, seven years, or, ahem, on and off for over twenty) is the mindfuck. So every time you think, "oh, just a puff" you're taking a step back by three days. Once you get through those first three days, keep telling yourself you physically don't *need* to smoke - you simply want to smoke. It takes 21 days to break a habit/create a healthy habit. YOU. CAN. DO. THIS. FX for you and good luck.

JellicalParker · January 2015

I quit nearly cold turkey this time last year. It was the best thing I could have done for my body. It was difficult for the first few days, and it got really hard when I was at work around all my smoking coworkers. The first days are the most important, I found using an empty e cig to hold in my hand when I felt the urge was really useful. Do what you need to to take care of your baby! GOOD for you for cutting back so drastically!

andrjcarpenter · January 2015

I'm not a smoker but I just wanted to chime in and wish you luck.

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