Circumcision

Lezzie82 · December 2014

We did. I am not going to lie to me it looked a lot nastier than I thought it would.... I cried for about an hour and then I got over it and he is fine now.

lupineaura · December 2014

To everyone:

Thank you, thank you, thank you for keeping this conversation civilized/rational. I've seen some nightmare debates over this issue and was dreading the inevitability of the topic being raised here, but so far, my fears have been groundless.

To the OP:

We are circ'ing, it wasn't a debate in our house because we're Jewish. Not sure what we would do if religion wasn't a factor.

Edited to clarify: we will circ if one/both of these babies is a boy. We don't know the sexes yet.

roundtwoOMG · December 2014

We did not circumcise our son and if this baby had been a boy, we would leave him intact as well.

It is one of the few things I feel very, very strongly about and actually don't fall into the "it's a personal decision/up to you/I don't care what others do" camp.

That said - I'd never want to get into a fight with someone about it. If someone asks me IRL, I always preface the discussion by saying "just FYI - I feel very strongly about this and will be unable to give a balanced, two sided argument".

Anyways - I also get the sense that in Canada anyway, leaving boys intact is becoming more normal so I'm pretty sure my son won't be the only one in his class...

sarahchrismck · December 2014

I always thought we would. We found out it was a boy on Friday and I asked my husband if we would circumcise or not, and he said we absolutely would.

So, yes, we are going to.

Snapdragon750 · December 2014

shmeell25 said:

roundtwoOMG said:

It is one of the few things I feel very, very strongly about and actually don't fall into the "it's a personal decision/up to you/I don't care what others do" camp.

I truly am not trying to start a debate here, but am I reading this right? You don't think it's someone's personal decision whether they circ their own kids or not? How could it affect you if they don't?

This is almost for sure going to start a debate.

beezybaby · December 2014

I don't know if we are having a boy or a girl yet, but this has stressed me out every pregnancy until I have found out that both my babies were girls. I don't care about the look or cut or uncut. I don't care about teasing, or cleaning, or religion (as far as this is concerned). The only thing I can think about is, what a horrible way to be welcomed into this world.

I remember when my nephew was born, and first came home from the hospital, he would fuss a little from the pain of his circumcision. My MIL coo-ed something along the lines of "ohhhh...hush now. life is hard for all baby boys. Be a big boy and get tough, little one.." Ok, actually I remember it word for word. I had never had a thought about circ at the time, being unmarried and childless. But that blew my mind. Like, why oh why would I do something to my tiny baby that would make him have to tough it through the pain? And, do ALL boys have to "toughen up"? Do I have a choice?

Now, having two daughters, I loved how intimate and safe their first days were. They stayed with us for every minute. All the shots, baths, etc.. were done in the room at our request. I was able to hold and nurse them for their heel pricks and any other uncomfortable situations. I can't imagine sending my son off for such a terribly different experience, even if it is just 20 minutes. I just go all momma bear on this topic-when it comes to my (hypothetical) son.

DH is adamant we circumcise, ONLY because he thinks it looks weird otherwise. So....I feel like we both feel strongly, but my reasoning carries more weight. I have no idea who will win this battle, if we end up with a boy.

icajesica82 · December 2014

roundtwoOMG said:

We did not circumcise our son and if this baby had been a boy, we would leave him intact as well.

It is one of the few things I feel very, very strongly about and actually don't fall into the "it's a personal decision/up to you/I don't care what others do" camp.

That said - I'd never want to get into a fight with someone about it. If someone asks me IRL, I always preface the discussion by saying "just FYI - I feel very strongly about this and will be unable to give a balanced, two sided argument".

Anyways - I also get the sense that in Canada anyway, leaving boys intact is becoming more normal so I'm pretty sure my son won't be the only one in his class...

I think it is becoming more common in the US too to not circ. That's really what opened my eyes to it and made me want to look more into it.

bugaboo15 · December 2014

I asked my doctor about this and he said a lot a people choose the get there kids circumcised to decrease the risk of infections in the future. A circumcised penis is a lot easier to clean than one that is not. So based on that we will be getting our son cicumcised.

sabriel1 · December 2014

icajesica82 said: roundtwoOMG said: We did not circumcise our son and if this baby had been a boy, we would leave him intact as well.
It is one of the few things I feel very, very strongly about and actually don't fall into the "it's a personal decision/up to you/I don't care what others do" camp.
That said - I'd never want to get into a fight with someone about it. If someone asks me IRL, I always preface the discussion by saying "just FYI - I feel very strongly about this and will be unable to give a balanced, two sided argument".
Anyways - I also get the sense that in Canada anyway, leaving boys intact is becoming more normal so I'm pretty sure my son won't be the only one in his class... I think it is becoming more common in the US too to not circ. That's really what opened my eyes to it and made me want to look more into it.

This is true in the part of Canada I'm from too - I would say it is probably more likely than not to meet someone with and uncircumcised penis. Actually, I've never seen a circumcised one in real life or heard of anyone doing it for their kids/

I just read that in Canada the circumcision rate is only 10% in hospitals and is on a downward trend. I also once saw an interesting map of the States that showed how circumsision rates are so regional, it's actually extremely interesting.

I wouldn't have it done to my son but it's a personal choice for others so what other people do doesn't bother me at all.

melissa050180 · December 2014

From everything I have read, it greatly reduced the risk of infection and other issues later in life. I also know someone who had to have it done later in life, which does not seem like a lot of fun.

DawnLilly · December 2014

shmeell25 said:

roundtwoOMG said:

It is one of the few things I feel very, very strongly about and actually don't fall into the "it's a personal decision/up to you/I don't care what others do" camp.

I truly am not trying to start a debate here, but am I reading this right? You don't think it's someone's personal decision whether they circ their own kids or not? How could it affect you if they don't?

Until she comes back, because I have seen so many of these threads, and I'm not saying this is my personal opinion:

Its not a personal decision because your son isn't making the choice. Parents make bad choices for their kids all the time like not vaccinating. That doesn't mean its okay just because its their personal discrection as a parent. Some people do see circumcision as directly harmful and a mutilation. Again, not necessarily my personal opinion.

@roundtwoOMG if I'm off-base here please feel free to contradict me.

EntropicEpona · December 2014

bugaboo15 said:

I asked my doctor about this and he said a lot a people choose the get there kids circumcised to decrease the risk of infections in the future. A circumcised penis is a lot easier to clean than one that is not. So based on that we will be getting our son cicumcised.

I would need to see some serious medical literature to prove that this is actually true to me. We have soap, we have water... are foreskin infections really that rampant? I can clean my own genitals quite well, and I'd imagine that boys/men can do the same.

That said, I really don't think circumcising or not is a personal choice. You're making a choice for your child; they're not making it for themselves.

sabriel1 · December 2014

Bump burp

EntropicEpona · December 2014

^

That's because it's damn cold in most Canadian places in winter, and a turtleneck is de rigueur.

annerz22 · December 2014

@beezybaby‌ just an FYI, not all circumcisions are bad. DS had a numbing shot, a very clean cut, and came back to me awake and alert and ready to nurse. I believe he was gone for 20 minutes and he healed all up within a week or so. Now I know some have complications and not all drs use a numbing agent, but not every circumcision is a horrible experience.

We circumcised DS because of family health issues that having a foreskin can worsen if my boys have the same issues. It was better to take care of circumcision now rather than down the road when it could complicate other oasis. Had we not had that issue I think we still would have done it, but it would have been much more of a debate.

Lalalady54 · December 2014

I think the AAP statement that states circumcision leads to lower risk of STIs later in life, lower UTI occurrence and easier genital hygiene is a good one to look at when arguing cleanliness. I'm no saying a parent of an uncircumcised male wouldn't be more diligent in the care but it still leads to the potential of more infections. That being said, I work in a Peds ED the worst procedure I think that takes place is on a phimosis or para phimosis of an uncircumcised boy. It looks very uncomfortable and usually leads to the child needing a circumcision after at some point in the future. Another not fun procedure are VCUGs and for boys after they have one UTI they usually have a VCUG ordered, again no fun.

rivers714 · December 2014

My son is but my brother is not. My brother is 3 yrs older so the only other owned besides his dad's he's seen.

My son is deeply disturbed his will look like a hairy mushroom like his dad's

His penis is not protected from the hot water of the bath and other imagined penis monsters

He also wonders if it's now smaller because he doesn't have it

He likes to point out " I had him cut"

Basically my kids the only person i ever met who wishes he wasn't circumcised..... Oiy!

mp03jp · December 2014

I wish there was and idk option for this poll. With DS we did and I kind of feel like we decided that just because we thought that's what we were suppose to do. We also don't know what we are having yet.

But with DS we didn't have to clean it any special way after he was circumcised. In fact I believe they told us only water and no baby wipes until the little bell thing fell off. So cleaning it wasn't a big deal.

Pintobean39 · December 2014

mp03jp said:
I wish there was and idk option for this poll. With DS we did and I kind of feel like we decided that just because we thought that's what we were suppose to do. We also don't know what we are having yet.
But with DS we didn't have to clean it any special way after he was circumcised. In fact I believe they told us only water and no baby wipes until the little bell thing fell off. So cleaning it wasn't a big deal.

Neither one of my boys had anything fall off. They came back to me without the turtle neck and it was just a little red. Nothing special had to be done but some Vaseline for a few days.

My oldest when I brought him home afterwards I was changing him and he grabbed a hold of it. I freaked out but he didn't even flinch so I'm assuming it wasn't really that sore.

kac22 · December 2014

Man am I thankful I am having another girl!

Pintobean39 · December 2014

ramy3 said:

@Pintobean39‌ I'm not sure if it's been available long, but the plastibel is common for circumcisions now. It's super easy to deal with because there isn't an open wound. You don't do anything and it falls off on its own, usually around the same time the umbilical cord falls off.

Well, I should just be considered a FTM because not a damn thing is the same as it was when my boys were born. I'm sure there is a reason they changed everything but my boys didn't have open wounds either. It literally just looked red and that was it.

lakingsfan2015 · December 2014

Pintobean39 said:

ramy3 said:

@Pintobean39‌ I'm not sure if it's been available long, but the plastibel is common for circumcisions now. It's super easy to deal with because there isn't an open wound. You don't do anything and it falls off on its own, usually around the same time the umbilical cord falls off.

Well, I should just be considered a FTM because not a damn thing is the same as it was when my boys were born. I'm sure there is a reason they changed everything but my boys didn't have open wounds either. It literally just looked red and that was it.

I think our sons (your youngest and my oldest) are a few weeks apart and for him they used the Plastibel but the other 2 were done in a different state and were not done using the Plastibel.

DawnLilly · December 2014

If as many guys got infections as some of you are suggesting they do, there would be marketing and commercials for special creams and soaps abundant as monastat and ED treatments.

27 years and DH has never had an infection. I asked the pediatrician his recommendations for care when DS was born. I also asked MIL now that DS is getting older. She said FIL taught the boys to shake it out when they're done. In the shower to pull it back and rinse it off and nothing more abrasive than their hand and plain water is needed on the head. This doesn't seem overly complicated or difficult to me. If a circumcised guy doesn't have to wash at least this well then I'm glad I'm never having sex with another.

Snapdragon750 · December 2014

beezybaby said:

I don't know if we are having a boy or a girl yet, but this has stressed me out every pregnancy until I have found out that both my babies were girls. I don't care about the look or cut or uncut. I don't care about teasing, or cleaning, or religion (as far as this is concerned). The only thing I can think about is, what a horrible way to be welcomed into this world.
I remember when my nephew was born, and first came home from the hospital, he would fuss a little from the pain of his circumcision. My MIL coo-ed something along the lines of "ohhhh...hush now. life is hard for all baby boys. Be a big boy and get tough, little one.." Ok, actually I remember it word for word. I had never had a thought about circ at the time, being unmarried and childless. But that blew my mind. Like, why oh why would I do something to my tiny baby that would make him have to tough it through the pain? And, do ALL boys have to "toughen up"? Do I have a choice?
Now, having two daughters, I loved how intimate and safe their first days were. They stayed with us for every minute. All the shots, baths, etc.. were done in the room at our request. I was able to hold and nurse them for their heel pricks and any other uncomfortable situations. I can't imagine sending my son off for such a terribly different experience, even if it is just 20 minutes. I just go all momma bear on this topic-when it comes to my (hypothetical) son.
DH is adamant we circumcise, ONLY because he thinks it looks weird otherwise. So....I feel like we both feel strongly, but my reasoning carries more weight. I have no idea who will win this battle, if we end up with a boy.

****stuck in quote box*****

If you use a good, experienced mohel, it takes only 15 seconds, often there's no crying, and the baby is held in someone's arms. I've personally seen a few, even though I only have girls, and it's less traumatic than a shot. Sorry to keep bringing this up, but it's a pet peeve of mine when all circumcision gets lumped in with hospital circumcisions, and you should know you have other options between "sending him off for 20 minutes" and not circumcising.

mp03jp · December 2014

Pintobean39 said:

I wish there was and idk option for this poll. With DS we did and I kind of feel like we decided that just because we thought that's what we were suppose to do. We also don't know what we are having yet.
But with DS we didn't have to clean it any special way after he was circumcised. In fact I believe they told us only water and no baby wipes until the little bell thing fell off. So cleaning it wasn't a big deal.
Neither one of my boys had anything fall off. They came back to me without the turtle neck and it was just a little red. Nothing special had to be done but some Vaseline for a few days. My oldest when I brought him home afterwards I was changing him and he grabbed a hold of it. I freaked out but he didn't even flinch so I'm assuming it wasn't really that sore.

The bell thing (at least that's what I think it was called) is a little plastic ring they sometimes use in circumcision. not doctor uses it every time. I guess I should of mentioned that the first time

Unknown · December 2014

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Lalalady54 · December 2014

blackpearl08 said:
**Just popping in after a long day**

Is it time for the popcorn yet??

I've been waiting all day too...

CTri17 · December 2014

If it is a boy, we do not plan to.

Ashtastic515 · December 2014

My only opinion is that a penis is a penis and they are all UGLY looking! We have two DS & they both call it their "bird" ... So I'm constantly yelling, don't forget to wash your little birdies when they shower! That is all.

khaleesi123 · December 2014

I had never even thought about that up until this point. Just turned and asked "will we circumcise our son?" .. He said no so I guess it's no.. I have no strong feelings towards this at all.

Unknown · December 2014

This content has been removed.

Lalalady54 · December 2014

SaltyH2O said:
@blackpearl08 & @lalalady54 - I can't tell if the lack of explosive or "lecture-y" content/reactions is a function of people being too busy today to read and respond, or more a reflection of the fact that this board is seriously made up of a lot of respectful adults.....I just thought for sure there would be more comments here by now!'

It's early though.....

Our board is really nice, the newbies who cry can all read this thread and realize if popcorn wasn't warranted over circumcision talk we may be the nicest BMB to ever exist...seriously.

lysser1218 · December 2014

I am having a boy. My boyfriend is and we both agree that he will be. This is one thing we both feel is a definite.

annerz22 · December 2014

Lalalady54 said:

SaltyH2O said:
@blackpearl08 & @lalalady54 - I can't tell if the lack of explosive or "lecture-y" content/reactions is a function of people being too busy today to read and respond, or more a reflection of the fact that this board is seriously made up of a lot of respectful adults.....I just thought for sure there would be more comments here by now!'

It's early though.....
Our board is really nice, the newbies who cry can all read this thread and realize if popcorn wasn't warranted over circumcision talk we may be the nicest BMB to ever exist...seriously.

Seriously!! My BMB with DS this convo went in the waaaaay other direction. I think it ended up being 10 pages of insults, name calling, members getting banned, and a contest of who was the bigger mommy martyr. By the end, I don't even think it was even talking about circs anymore.

josim · December 2014

holly1416 said:

icajesica82 said:

roundtwoOMG said:

We did not circumcise our son and if this baby had been a boy, we would leave him intact as well.

It is one of the few things I feel very, very strongly about and actually don't fall into the "it's a personal decision/up to you/I don't care what others do" camp.

That said - I'd never want to get into a fight with someone about it. If someone asks me IRL, I always preface the discussion by saying "just FYI - I feel very strongly about this and will be unable to give a balanced, two sided argument".

Anyways - I also get the sense that in Canada anyway, leaving boys intact is becoming more normal so I'm pretty sure my son won't be the only one in his class...

I think it is becoming more common in the US too to not circ. That's really what opened my eyes to it and made me want to look more into it.

This is true in the part of Canada I'm from too - I would say it is probably more likely than not to meet someone with and uncircumcised penis. Actually, I've never seen a circumcised one in real life or heard of anyone doing it for their kids/

I just read that in Canada the circumcision rate is only 10% in hospitals and is on a downward trend. I also once saw an interesting map of the States that showed how circumsision rates are so regional, it's actually extremely interesting.

I wouldn't have it done to my son but it's a personal choice for others so what other people do doesn't bother me at all.
------quote box fail------

I'm curious to know where you read that stat...I'm in Canada too, and I have seen many penises (hubs plays hockey and those boys like to be naked. All. the. time.) I have only seen one uncut guy. And yes, guys do check each other out. And yes, they think it's weird if someone on the team doesn't shower with them. Maybe it's just hockey culture.

The women at my office who have all had sons have had them circumcised.

So maybe circumcision a regional thing in Canada--we're not in a cold part of Canada. Or maybe I'm basing it off a homogenous group. I doubt it's under 10% though.

Either way, if we have a son, he will be circumcised. My hubby feels very strongly about it--not because he wants our LO to "look like dad". I don't have an opinion one way or another--we're not religious and I haven't done any research on it yet.

Snapdragon750 · December 2014

blackpearl08 said:

SaltyH2O said:
@blackpearl08 & @lalalady54 - I can't tell if the lack of explosive or "lecture-y" content/reactions is a function of people being too busy today to read and respond, or more a reflection of the fact that this board is seriously made up of a lot of respectful adults.....I just thought for sure there would be more comments here by now!'

It's early though.....
I did get a bit nervous when the language of "intact" was used. I am ok with an actual debate on this but I was anticipating a few dramatic moments thrown in as well.

If you feel really strongly about it not being done, you probably aren't ok with it being done to other people's kids either but that viewpoint hasn't been voiced yet.

It was voiced once but she hasn't been back since.

supersarah77 · December 2014

For the record, AAP flip-flops on their stance every couple years. And per the CDC report, my region of the country (West) has the lowest circ rate at 40%, so most boys aren't these days. I'll leave it up to DH because there's really no strong evidence of harm or benefit one way or the other.

kj808 · December 2014

DH is, DS is, and this boy will be also.

Ashtastic515 · December 2014

petrichor10 said:
No, we will not circumcise. When I was pregnant with our first son I researched it and decided I didn't want to. Then I asked dh his opinion and he didn't even hesitate. No.

Our 9-year-old is intact and this LO will stay that way, too.

Someone way back on the first or second page of this thread talked about little children noticing the difference. I was a kindergarten teacher for a long time. I never saw any of their penises, but I've taught over 300 5-year-olds. I'm sure many of them were not circumcised (I'm basing this on the fact that I teach many children from different countries where there is no RIC.) Never once have I had a boy say a word about another boy's penis and then all went into the bathroom together to use the urinals.

First off, please sincerely excuse my ignorance.... Circumsized penises are considered to NOT be "intact?" That word in itself just seems super harsh.. Is that truly the medical term?

Both of our DS are circumcised and if someone ever told them their little birds were not "intact" I do believe my mama bear claws would come out real quick! Mostly because it just sounds like a personal attack on their masculinity.

Anyways.. Not political.. Don't care which way you swing.. Just curious about that terminology!

Unknown · December 2014

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