Am I the only one this has happened to? On several occasions strangers have said variations of he's so cute I could keep him, he's so cute I could steal him etc. what the fuck is wrong with these people? Why would you ever say that to a mother? It is the most terrifying thing immaginable! It is not cute! It is not a compliment!
This happened to me this weekend and my dh said I responded like a crazy person....
We were at a busy store Christmas shopping when a clerk came over to offer assistance. Then she starts in on how adorable Baylor is. Ok, no biggie. She says "he's so cute you won't make it out of the store with him. I'm going to steal him" she was all smiles and baby talk....weird. I ignored it and kept shopping. She comes over and says a similar baby snatching comment again....I walk away and keep shopping. Finally, we are checking out she comes over a THIRD time and says something about taking him and keeping him forever and not letting me leave with him all in cutie baby talk. So I finally responded and I said back in cutie baby talk " oh no you won't because I'll burn your fucking store down if you touch him you crazy bitch" and she froze and dh and I turned and walked away. After we left dh said I sounded crazy and over reacted. I dont think I did at all. I mean this crazy bitch said something about stealing my baby 3 times! I know she probably didn't mean it but seriously what the fuck!?!
This has happened with certain family members, my usual response is "over my cold, dead body." Three times from a stranger is really creepy and would turn me into a momma bear. I don't think you over reacted, I mean really, how many times can someone push you until you snap.
“When the first baby laughed for the first time, its laugh broke into a
thousand pieces, and they all went skipping about, and that was the
beginning of fairies.” - J.M. Barrie Peter Pan
I have died every day waiting for you. Darling, don't be afraid, I have loved you for a thousand years. And all along I believed I would find you, time has brought your heart to me. I have loved you for a thousand years. I'll love you a thousand more.
I'm not sure I would have thought to say something on the spot but I might have found a manager and told him/her how uncomfortable the store worker made me with her comments and how unprofessional/unnecessary, etc they were and ask him to speak with her. Sometimes I'm non-confrontational for sure. It depends on the day. But some days... Who knows, I might have blown up like you did.
Yeah, I have to agree that it was an overreaction. People say dumb crap, as PP said. As another suggested, I would have spoken with a manager about her conduct. They can address it with her. Or make some silly comment like "I'll never let anyone steal him/her away!" Or "I'll keep him/her, thanks! "
You probably overreacted with the "burn the store down" comment. The sales lady might not ever approach another baby ever. But, I totally get why you were upset.
However, people (even strangers) will tell me things like "I'm going to steal him!" or something to that affect. I usually smile and respond with "You can try, but I will out run you..." and the comments typically stop.
Uh oh, I've totally said that to people before! In the past, when my friends who had babies would give them to me to hold I would ooh and ahh over them and baby talk and suggest that they just come home with me and be my baby.
Of COURSE, under no circumstances was this a real "threat", I was just expressing how much I liked the baby. I'm sure that was the same with the store clerk, and you probably scared the shit out of her!!!
5 years TTC, no luck with IUI's, failed IVF June 2013,
FET Oct 2013 with delayed transfer, intralipids, lovenox & prednisone= first BFP of my life!
You're comment was a little over the top, but I certainly would have said to her how she was creeping me out. Her behavior was excessive too. I'm assuming you won't be shopping there anymore?
I can see why you got pushed to your limit. It was a bit of an over reaction but kind of awesome too. I think 3 times is obsessive from that clerk and honestly after the 2nd, I probably would have stopped her before she could talk to my kid again. Just seems odd.
I think if someone were going to steal your baby they probably wouldn't tell you they were going to do it first.
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I heart theSkimm I heart YNAB --------- “Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." - Albus Dumbledore
I'm going to agree with most others that while what she said definitely hit the creep factor limit, the way you phrased your response was over the top. I've been known to talk back to people when they do dumb shit, but dropping F bombs and calling someone a "crazy bitch" puts you right in line with her creepy/crazy factor. If you're that uncomfortable in an establishment by an employee, you either never shop there again, and/or speak to the manager.
Well now I feel guilty....she probably just hit me on a bad day. At least I said it in the obnoxious baby voice to match hers and didn't yell at her....I'm going to have to check myself
As a FTM, I find people say stupid shit like this ALL THE TIME. It takes so much patience for me not to lose it like you did. The fact is that people generally don't mean any harm when they say these things and actually think they are being nice/helpful. I have decided that going forward I am going to be prepared with a canned, generic but super passive-aggressive reponse for these people.
I've actually had a lot of anxiety about things happening to Junie (like kidnapping) and comments like "Look out, I'll steal her!" are very disturbing. For some reason, pretty much everyone who stopped to look at her when she was really little made a comment like that.
After that had happened a lot, I decided that I'll just respond with "I know you really don't mean anything malicious, but that thought gives me a great deal of anxiety! I don't want to seem weird, but I just thought I'd let you know how that makes me feel."
I know that people don't mean any harm, but it's not really a cute/funny thing to say. It's too real.
I've actually had a lot of anxiety about things happening to Junie (like kidnapping) and comments like "Look out, I'll steal her!" are very disturbing. For some reason, pretty much everyone who stopped to look at her when she was really little made a comment like that.
After that had happened a lot, I decided that I'll just respond with "I know you really don't mean anything malicious, but that thought gives me a great deal of anxiety! I don't want to seem weird, but I just thought I'd let you know how that makes me feel."
I know that people don't mean any harm, but it's not really a cute/funny thing to say. It's too real.
This is what a responsible adult should do. Now I really feel guilty.
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I tell every baby that I could just "eat them" and I play bite them.
I don't really want to eat them.
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I tell every baby that I could just "eat them" and I play bite them.
I don't really want to eat them.
This!
I keep telling everyone, "DD is so cute, you just want to eat her right? Sprinkle some BBQ sauce on her toes and eat her feet for dinner, so stinking cute!"
I don't really think anyone would take me up on it, but I have put her foot in my mouth.
I tlike luvell every baby that I could just "eat them" and I play bite them.
I don't really want to eat them.
This!
I keep telling everyone, "DD is so cute, you just want to eat her right? Sprinkle some BBQ sauce on her toes and eat her feet for dinner, so stinking cute!"
I don't really think anyone would take me up on it, but I have put her foot in my mouth.
The thing is rational me knows she didn't mean it it...I say things like I'll just eat you up but I'm no cannibal. I'm definitely adopting the calm and level headed explanation that it gives me anxiety like livknight
So, could you write an apology note to the clerk and just be like, "I'm sorry I reacted the way I did. It was making me uncomfortable, but my reaction was out of proportion." Or would that be weird? I lost my shit on a customer service agent at a cell phone company once. I had every reason to be frustrated, but not every reason to get as crazy as I did. I never saw her again, but I did leave an "oops, I'm sorry, I apologize, etc., etc" note for her later in the day.
I don't know...should I? It's a store I'll probably never go to again. The coach outletlikean hour away from my house....but i guess never seeing again isn't really an excuse not to apologize...
So, could you write an apology note to the clerk and just be like, "I'm sorry I reacted the way I did. It was making me uncomfortable, but my reaction was out of proportion." Or would that be weird? I lost my shit on a customer service agent at a cell phone company once. I had every reason to be frustrated, but not every reason to get as crazy as I did. I never saw her again, but I did leave an "oops, I'm sorry, I apologize, etc., etc" note for her later in the day.
I don't know...should I? It's a store I'll probably never go to again. The coach outletlikean hour away from my house....but i guess never seeing again isn't really an excuse not to apologize...
It may not be worth a drive out there, but there's no harm in calling or sending a note in the mail if it would help you feel less guilty about it.
Then again, retail people deal with all sorts of crazy, so you could just be a fun story for her to add to her list.
Nope, no bullshit. I've been around to long to even attempt to bullshit these savvy ladies.
Can I just say that "I've been here forever of course I'm not bullshitting you" really holds very little weight around here anymore.
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I heart theSkimm I heart YNAB --------- “Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." - Albus Dumbledore
Nope, no bullshit. I've been around to long to even attempt to bullshit these savvy ladies.I
;;
Can I just say that "I've been here forever of course I'm not bullshitting you" really holds very little weight around here anymore.
True story...It only takes a quick Google to know I'm real though.
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I heart theSkimm I heart YNAB --------- “Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light." - Albus Dumbledore
As other PP have posted, i think it was definitely an overreaction. People say stuff to me all the time when I'm out with Spencer. He's a BABY! Babies are cute, man!
Take it as a compliment and continue on with your day.
People generally mean well. Try to lighten the mood with counter comments like "she isn't up for grabs," "I'm keeping her forever," or "I knew I should have kept the cord on her!"
My little one is kind of a pain in the ass so I dare someone to comment like that around me. They get a 5 month old and a bright shiny City Mini.
Sorry!!! I too thought the story is bullshit. Doesn't matter if you are real, you can make that up. I think the reason some people call bullshit is because your response actually makes you crazier than the said baby stealer store clerk.
Now, is she did steal a baby per say, would she clock out first? That there is a mystery.
My little one is kind of a pain in the ass so I dare someone to comment like that around me. They get a 5 month old and a bright shiny City Mini.
Sorry!!! I too thought the story is bullshit. Doesn't matter if you are real, you can make that up. I think the reason some people call bullshit is because your response actually makes you crazier than the said baby stealer store clerk.
Now, is she did steal a baby per say, would she clock out first? That there is a mystery.
If she clocks out then she doesn't have an alibi, she would get caught for sure.
Sadly, this sounds like how I might respond, given certain circumstances. I know I have high anxiety, been on meds and diagnosed for ages it seems. I bite peoples heads off and immediately feel horrible. In this situation I wouldn't feel bad. I did the same while pregnant and random people touched my belly. Even relatives were fair game without asking!! I need my personal space. Luckily, the people I know and love understand this...
Re: "I could just steal him"....ummmmm no.
“When the first baby laughed for the first time, its laugh broke into a thousand pieces, and they all went skipping about, and that was the beginning of fairies.”
- J.M. Barrie Peter Pan
married on the sweetest day 10.20.12
Chicken - 07.08.06 | Bubsy - 02.24.09 | Sunshine - 07.16.14
11.2011 - DS1
02.2013 - loss at 6 wks
06.2014 - DS2
10.2015 - loss at 12 wks
03.2017 - DD
I heart YNAB
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“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times,
if one only remembers to turn on the light."
- Albus Dumbledore
I keep telling everyone, "DD is so cute, you just want to eat her right? Sprinkle some BBQ sauce on her toes and eat her feet for dinner, so stinking cute!"
The thing is rational me knows she didn't mean it it...I say things like I'll just eat you up but I'm no cannibal. I'm definitely adopting the calm and level headed explanation that it gives me anxiety like livknight
I heart YNAB
---------
“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times,
if one only remembers to turn on the light."
- Albus Dumbledore
PS Been around longer than you.
PS Been around longer than you.
It wasn't my proudest moment...and I wasn't pulling out a who's been here the longest measuring stick.
I heart YNAB
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“Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times,
if one only remembers to turn on the light."
- Albus Dumbledore
Last one if you wanna stun them and make a dash.
Sorry!!! I too thought the story is bullshit. Doesn't matter if you are real, you can make that up. I think the reason some people call bullshit is because your response actually makes you crazier than the said baby stealer store clerk.
Now, is she did steal a baby per say, would she clock out first? That there is a mystery.