Thusday's in-law / family rants

chertmm · December 2014

Let's hear how your family members are driving you crazy!

chertmm · December 2014

My MIL has assumed that she will keep the baby full time when I go back to work. We live in the city, and both DH and I work north of the city. My in-laws live in a county south of the city. What is currently a 10-20 commute would take over an hour plus tolls if we took the baby to her house. When I explained this to her, she suggested we could meet somewhere to "pass the baby." Sorry, I am not meeting you at a gas station parking lot every day to pass my kid off like a drug deal. I suggested a compromise of possibly letting her keep the baby 1 or 2 days a week and doing daycare for the other days. She told me, NO. She wants the baby with her everyday and she needs to know the dates of my maternity leave now because they are doing employment letters of intent at her job and she needs to tell them with in a week. Oh well then. Don't quit your day job. You won;t get the kid at all. [-X

stephaniesee · December 2014

I showed my MIL a FIVE SECOND video of a possible announcement (us walking among Christmas trees in the snow and holding a sign saying we're expecting at the end) and she CRITIQUED IT!!!!! I texted her the video and said "look what my brother came up with". Why is she incapable of keeping her unecessary opinions to herself?

AnnaK1985 · December 2014

My mother-in-law has been "heavily hinting" that I need to stop being "lazy and learn to drive." In case there's an emergency of course. Granted, she's one of the many who doesn't believe anything about my health, it still pisses me off.

lgsdesigner · December 2014

I have a good one.

Let me preface by saying my stepdad is racist towards blacks, but won’t ever admit that.

It’s post-Thanksgiving dinner, and I am talking to my mother about how interesting I find court cases, and enjoy watching Court TV.

I then say something about Michael Brown’s case, and my stepdad stands up and points and me and says “He deserved everything he got!”

I asked him to clarify and he goes “That thug needed to be killed. He would have died anyway hanging out with his boys. I don’t see it as a big deal. I mean...he has that black man mentality and is nothing but ignorant.”

I stand up, stare him square in the eye, and pretty much let him have it for a good 4-5 minutes. My stepdads eyes get really big, and he goes “You know black colleges dumbdown tests so blacks can pass, right? I mean—it’s a fact! Again—blacks are ignorant. Well…most blacks! AND I’M NOT RACIST, but…”

I then tell him HE is the ignorant one, and if he continues with his racist comments, I will NOT have my children around him. They don’t need to be exposed to such filth.

He then gets quiet, my mom ushers him away and they leave.

The good news is, my brother’s house was SO LOUD, people barely heard our conversation.

I don’t regret it one bit of it. He deserves to be put in his place! The motto: Don’t eff with a pregnant woman.

VeganOnTuesdays · December 2014

chertmm said:

My MIL has assumed that she will keep the baby full time when I go back to work. We live in the city, and both DH and I work north of the city. My in-laws live in a county south of the city. What is currently a 10-20 commute would take over an hour plus tolls if we took the baby to her house. When I explained this to her, she suggested we could meet somewhere to "pass the baby." Sorry, I am not meeting you at a gas station parking lot every day to pass my kid off like a drug deal. I suggested a compromise of possibly letting her keep the baby 1 or 2 days a week and doing daycare for the other days. She told me, NO. She wants the baby with her everyday and she needs to know the dates of my maternity leave now because they are doing employment letters of intent at her job and she needs to tell them with in a week. Oh well then. Don't quit your day job. You won;t get the kid at all. [-X

What if she babysat at your house?

kandybarandco · December 2014

Re: PP whose mothers/MILs are saying they'll babysit full time, take that with a grain of salt. My sister's MIL did the same thing, insisted that she'd watch my nephew every day and that my sister didn't need to look for a daycare, and that worked for about six months before she started to complain that other grandparents weren't pulling their weight (Um, no one else volunteered) and that she had decided to go back to work. So.

I've come to rant about my step-MIL. She never had any kids of her own and has obviously never spent a lot of time around kids, but she tends to get highly possessive and proprietary over DS, and yet does the dumbest things. I walked in on her once when DS was very small and she was trying to burp him, but she was holding him by the neck! Choking him! Anyway, I try to limit the time that DS stays with her for his own safety, but she was in rare form on Thanksgiving. First of all, when she first showed up, she told DS not to do something because "it made him sound like a girl." Like "girl" is a huge insult. If she ever uses girl as an insult again I'm going to put a stop to that real fast, because I don't need my son learning that sort of sexist crap.

And then, later, she was talking to my dad and his girlfriend (Dad is also not winning any grandparenting awards--DS knows and likes my MIL's girlfriend better than my dad because he's simply never around) and DS was being an idiot and climbing through the bannister on the stairs (only about two feet off the ground, luckily), and DS slipped and his head got stuck in the bannister, so he's literally hanging from his head, and all three of them just stared at him! I had to run across the room as fast as I could to rescue him!

::wrings invisible necks:: aaaugh

lgsdesigner · December 2014

GFJ48 said:
FIL got a picc line put in. FIL/MIL/BIL are sort of uneducated, don't listen and don't remember anything...FIL took a shower (they have well water) with the picc line in and got an infection. He had to stay in the hospital 3 days. Seriously??? I just can't with them. Pay attention to what the doctors tell you!!!!

Wow....WTF?!? That is something you don't mess with.

Honda13 · December 2014

I have the opposite in law problem with babysitting. They have watched our nephew for the last 5 years for FREE. We mentioned utilizing them for child care and paying them for helping out. They made it very clear that they will NOT watch our child for us, even if we pay. Mind you, they are still watching the nephew three days a week for free. At the end of the day it doesn't matter anyway because I got an opportunity to transfer to a branch closer to my house (farther from them) and I happily took it. So it wouldn't be convenient for them to babysit anyway. It just baffles me that they are willing to so for one of their children but not the other.

mabrams28 · December 2014

MrsPDX · December 2014

I surprisingly don't have any, other than on Monday (which I already ranted about in Monday's Bitchfest) MIL texted me about how stressful her day was, but how excited she was because she got a letter from DH...and I didn't have a letter.

Then I told her that, and she was like oh well, he seems fine.

They really could care less about me, this pregnancy, and how I am doing it all alone (including birth). They only care about DH, who is their eldest and golden child. Oh and they expect them to pick him up from the airport during his leave AND go to their house first. YEAH right!

rivers714 · December 2014

I told my grandma I was pregnant

" oh no, not again"

I have a seven year old whom I take care of fine. Not a hoard of children who've been taken away by the state.

Instead of " congrats" and such I got a " how did this happen" ... So because she was kinda being an ass, i returned the favor and explained what sex was and how that makes babies.

I also lit into her about being judgy and unsupportive. Three days later she finally texted her version of an apology. I'm sure in a few weeks she'll be fine. Just frustrating.

awoo22 · December 2014

Over Thanksgiving weekend, my MIL was the first person to ever rub my pregnant belly. It was so weird because I'm not even showing yet! I literally froze. Also, she got me and DH so SICK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! UGH!! I've been so good about avoiding germs and washing my hands 1000x a day and now my throat is so sore and my nose is all stuffed up!! And to top it all off, we couldn't even do any Black Friday shopping because she HAD to come with us and decides at 4pm to go get ready to leave the house. Er........... we could've been back by then! THANKS A BUNCH, MIL!!!!!

catmentzer21 · December 2014

My mil had her car break down Monday morning. She decided to come over( she lives two blocks away) at 5:30 in the morning and tell me that since I am not working right now I don't need my car and she is taking it until my husband can fix her car. My husband is a mechanic. No questions no asking nothing. Oh and no money to fix it because she think we should just do it for free and pay for the parts.
I really can't stand self entitled people.

Snapdragon750 · December 2014

@AlwaysLastZZ I don't have a good relationship with my mother either, for similar reasons (though less extreme--I lived with my dad, and her dude wasn't a convict), and when I got pregnant with DD1 she also started acting like we were best friends. My mistake was that I was excited to have someone else as excited by the pregnancy as I was, so I indulged her and called her a lot about it, and since she is so obsessed with babies I figured she'd be a good person to have around when I had DD, so she stayed with us for 3 weeks.

BIG mistake. I have many complaints, but the worst was this: She had an internet friend that she made on a forum discussing a 24 hour owl webcam (I KNOW) who lived in the area, and she wanted to use the opportunity to meet up with her while I was in the hospital. She said owl lady was going to meet her in the hospital's restaurant so they could hang out. Okay, I don't care. Next thing I know, owl lady and her daughter are walking unannounced (to me, at least) into my hospital room and want to hold the baby. Truth be told I was in such a post-birth haze that I don't even remember how I handled this, and it wasn't until many weeks later that I realized how bizarre and inappropriate it was. There was a code to my room, so I asked my mom how they got it, and she apologized and said that she gave it to them "just in case," but she didn't know they'd come up.

It was a couple years later that I really confronted her about why in the world she gave internet strangers my room code, and she replied with an exasperated, "Is it such a crime to want to show off my grandbaby??"

She's not coming this time.

Snapdragon750 · December 2014

AlwaysLastZZ said:
Oh my goodness! That's just not okay on so many levels. Yes it's a crime! Or at least it should be.
My mom has made me HATE the word grandbaby. Everyone who needs to know about my pregnancy knows. She posted it on Facebook one day and one of my close friends took a screen shot and sent it to me. (I don't have facebook) After I specifically told her NO facebook. So I made her delete it. Now every time she texts me it's "when can I announce my grandbaby" I would reply with to who? Because 1 or 2 people that I don't know, sure go ahead. But she says "I don't know, everyone" so I say "sooo facebook?" and she goes "well yeah"
WELL NO! My child isn't going to be an easy way for you to get "likes" on a status and so people can congratulate you! Go away woman!

oh my gosh. Are we actually sisters? Are our moms the same person?

We were team green, and after I had the baby we asked my mom to get something from our house, and when she did she left a note on the door saying "It's a girl!" To explain how awful this was, I have to explain that we lived in a tight-knit Orthodox Jewish community, and this was on Saturday when literally everyone was walking by our house to go to synagogue, because we lived around the corner. And even if just one person saw it the news would have (and did) spread around to all our friends that day.

And because it was Saturday (the Sabbath), and we don't use the internet or phone that day, we couldn't call anyone or update FB until the next day. My mother (who is not orthodox) was under strict orders to say nothing on facebook and to tell no one, and she agreed, except she called her husband, whom she did not tell to keep it a secret. So he posted it on facebook to a "family only" group, as if that's better. They hid it from me for months because they are sensitive and didn't want to upset me, but my sister saw this on FB and told my dad. So literally everyone knew that I had the baby before I got to call them except for DH's family and my brother.

THANKS MOM.

essiexo698 · December 2014

I'm 21 and in school to double major and graduate in 2016, live on my own with my boyfriend and went to announce our pregnancy to my parents & it turned into an attack! They told us they were not happy for us, broke out the alcohol, sent my younger brother down stairs, and began to tell us how terrible this news was! My boyfriend ended up walking out feeling disrespected and I had to debate staying or sticking up for the man I love and who's baby I am carrying! Talk about anxiety to tell the rest of my family....

Snapdragon750 · December 2014

AlwaysLastZZ said:
I don't understand why our moms feel like they need to steal our thunder when they've already had their OWN babies! That was their time, this is our time! Sure being a grandma has to be exciting but you don't need to be so extreme! Ugh. My mom knew I was getting and elective ultrasound to find out the sex of this baby.. Why I told her I have NO idea. I told her DH and I were keeping it to ourselves until the baby was born. (I was lying, I just didn't want to tell her) and she said after the appointment if I didn't tell her she would call and text non stop until I told her. And she did!! She called me 46 times and texted 23. I threw my phone across the room and DH had to call and tell her it was a boy. I wish I could go back in time and never tell her I was pregnant!

I don't know about your mom, but with my mom EVERYthing is about her. And she's totally oblivious. She once said to me that if anything happened to me and DH, she'd obviously expect to get our kids. I told her they'd go to dad long before they'd go to her (which would be never), and she said. "But I'm younger!" I gave her a look. She said, "I'm good with babies!" I told her they're not going to be babies forever. Eventually they'll be teenagers. She said, "Oh I'll just give them to dad then!"

I think she was joking. It wasn't funny.

I didn't tell her I was pregnant last time until I was 6 months along. I still haven't told her this time. I've told everyone else, but luckily no one in the family really talks to her so unless it's on FB she won't find out.

Hconner3 · December 2014

My mother is pretty crazy! We have a strained relationship anyway. Today she texts me and says, "this is how the birth is going to happen!" She explains only her in the delivery room, and my dad and stepmom aren't allowed in the hospital. To which I reply nice joke! You will be lucky if you can visit us at the hospital!

PutMeintheZoo · December 2014

My in-law rant is pretty broad: My MIL is just extremely, extremely passive-aggressive. I can't stand her. If she disagrees with anything I say or do, she avoids me or give me the 'evil eye.' She especially gets this way if she's not happy with the way I discipline our son around her.

If my husband and I have to discipline him or talk to him, we now have to do it in a separate room or out of her earshot.

I wish she would just communicate! It would save us all a ton of stress, anger and confusion!

rivers714 · December 2014

New rant opposite end of spectrum. My mom is so excited about the baby she wants me to move in when my lease is over. She's had all her grandkids (2) live at her house the first year ( I was in school, my sisters fiancé was out of state). Her argument is it will let me save for a down payment for a place. My mom just loves babies, I think if she had her way shed of been like the Duggars. It's super nice and sweet sentiment - but once you're out of your parents house you get used to a certain about of privacy/freedoms!

rivers714 · December 2014

New rant opposite end of spectrum. My mom is so excited about the baby she wants me to move in when my lease is over. She's had all her grandkids (2) live at her house the first year ( I was in school, my sisters fiancé was out of state). Her argument is it will let me save for a down payment for a place. My mom just loves babies, I think if she had her way shed of been like the Duggars. It's super nice and sweet sentiment - but once you're out of your parents house you get used to a certain about of privacy/freedoms!

klk518 · December 2014

My MIL -- who lives 10 minutes from us already had a nursery started and had told me and others she ran into about it. She thinks she will be having our child overnight. Umm..NO! We will be raising our own child and no offense we will not be having sleep overs at your house then we live so close!! And when my husband confronted her about it she lied and said "what nursery? I just want to get a pack and play" LIAR! But that's not it. She literally turned it into something it wasn't and claimed we called her a bad grandma and that she wasn't allowed to see her grandchild among other things she claimed 'no nursery' meant. WTF -- you are crazy!! That's just the most recent of my crazy MIL.

smashbaby111 · December 2014

@captainleela‌ yikes! That was a spectacular email! Sounds kind of like my grandma- says what she wants with no restraint...

@kelsey925‌ my MIL is planning a nursery already as well, she has been offered a full nursery full of furniture, clothing, bottles, a glider, essentials, etc from different family friends (i am pretty sure they were intended for us, but they went through her) , and when she first mentioned that all this was being offered for this baby, hubby said "that's awesome, send it our way and let us know how we can thank them, we should definitely send them something" at which point she advised it was for her. Cuz, you know, she needs a nursery now.
Also! My MIL initially offered to throw me a shower when we first told her we were expecting, now her friends are apparently throwing her a "grandmother shower" so that she can have all the basics at her house for the baby... Now she came back to say that she didn't feel comfortable throwing me a shower because most of the people and family she wanted to invite will also be invited to her grandmother shower. I hate to complain because it makes me sound grabby, but I think it's amazing that she feels it's more important to outfit a nursery and prepare for a baby that will never stay there (she lives 15 minutes away) than for us to be prepared as the actual parents...
OK, vent complete!

Nita2603 · December 2014

My mother is in Germany, I live in Canada. This is my third kid. She has tried for the other two to come for the birth and stay with us - and I told her every time that I'd rather have her come later, like two weeks after. To give us a chance to become a family of 3/4 and now 5. Nope. She keeps telling me she will be here for the months of May, June, July and possibly August. Umm, no. You can come in June for 2-3 weeks.
She was here for 2 months the last time and it was horrible. It gets worse every time she gets here, she is a terrible influence on my boys.

No more. I am done. She can stay for two weeks, maybe three and if she can't behave then, she can't come at all. I am very much done.

Ryder0406 · December 2014

Little back story/family tree. My mother has a sister (my Aunt N, who I love and who is like a second mom to me.) Aunt N has two kids my cousins B and A. My mother also has a SIL, my Aunt J. (also has two kids but that doesn't matter to the story/rant) No one in my family likes aunt J. She has to make everything about her.

Her birthday is May 31st. My poor cousin B was unfortunate enough to also be born on May 31st... He is now 17 and aunt J is 50ish, and she STILL won't let the poor kid have his own birthday! At his birthday parties when he was little she always had to make sure everyone knew it was her birthday too. I get being excited to share a birthday but you're an adult, do you really need to pretend to take his gifts/cake and say they were for you because it's your birthday?..

At Thanksgiving DH and I announced to our families that we're expecting, due May 25th. First thing aunt J says after I say the due date? "Well, B, looks like we're gonna have to share our birthday with another one!" Bitch, are you serious?! 1. The due date is almost a week before your birthday and 2. The poor LO isn't even here yet and you're ALREADY making it about you??

I'm also hoping LO is a boy because aunt J asked the HR. (160 at the last appt.) She says "It's a girl! It's definitely a girl!"... Hoping boy just to rub it in her face...

a316b · December 2014

AlwaysLastZZ said:

Snapdragon750 said:

@AlwaysLastZZ I don't have a good relationship with my mother either, for similar reasons (though less extreme--I lived with my dad, and her dude wasn't a convict), and when I got pregnant with DD1 she also started acting like we were best friends. My mistake was that I was excited to have someone else as excited by the pregnancy as I was, so I indulged her and called her a lot about it, and since she is so obsessed with babies I figured she'd be a good person to have around when I had DD, so she stayed with us for 3 weeks.

BIG mistake. I have many complaints, but the worst was this: She had an internet friend that she made on a forum discussing a 24 hour owl webcam (I KNOW) who lived in the area, and she wanted to use the opportunity to meet up with her while I was in the hospital. She said owl lady was going to meet her in the hospital's restaurant so they could hang out. Okay, I don't care. Next thing I know, owl lady and her daughter are walking unannounced (to me, at least) into my hospital room and want to hold the baby. Truth be told I was in such a post-birth haze that I don't even remember how I handled this, and it wasn't until many weeks later that I realized how bizarre and inappropriate it was. There was a code to my room, so I asked my mom how they got it, and she apologized and said that she gave it to them "just in case," but she didn't know they'd come up.

It was a couple years later that I really confronted her about why in the world she gave internet strangers my room code, and she replied with an exasperated, "Is it such a crime to want to show off my grandbaby??"

She's not coming this time.

Oh my goodness! That's just not okay on so many levels. Yes it's a crime! Or at least it should be.

My mom has made me HATE the word grandbaby. Everyone who needs to know about my pregnancy knows. She posted it on Facebook one day and one of my close friends took a screen shot and sent it to me. (I don't have facebook) After I specifically told her NO facebook. So I made her delete it. Now every time she texts me it's "when can I announce my grandbaby" I would reply with to who? Because 1 or 2 people that I don't know, sure go ahead. But she says "I don't know, everyone" so I say "sooo facebook?" and she goes "well yeah"

WELL NO! My child isn't going to be an easy way for you to get "likes" on a status and so people can congratulate you! Go away woman!

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Quote fail
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I regret almost every day signing my MIL up for facebook. She shares my statuses and photos, comments on "her" babies (my kids), etc.

She would say she doesn't know how to delete... Annoying!

...and then I remembered I knew her password, as I had set up the account.

klk518 · December 2014

Well at least we're all in this together with crazy family!!! Haha

klk518 · December 2014

a316b said:

AlwaysLastZZ said:

Snapdragon750 said:

@AlwaysLastZZ I don't have a good relationship with my mother either, for similar reasons (though less extreme--I lived with my dad, and her dude wasn't a convict), and when I got pregnant with DD1 she also started acting like we were best friends. My mistake was that I was excited to have someone else as excited by the pregnancy as I was, so I indulged her and called her a lot about it, and since she is so obsessed with babies I figured she'd be a good person to have around when I had DD, so she stayed with us for 3 weeks.

BIG mistake. I have many complaints, but the worst was this: She had an internet friend that she made on a forum discussing a 24 hour owl webcam (I KNOW) who lived in the area, and she wanted to use the opportunity to meet up with her while I was in the hospital. She said owl lady was going to meet her in the hospital's restaurant so they could hang out. Okay, I don't care. Next thing I know, owl lady and her daughter are walking unannounced (to me, at least) into my hospital room and want to hold the baby. Truth be told I was in such a post-birth haze that I don't even remember how I handled this, and it wasn't until many weeks later that I realized how bizarre and inappropriate it was. There was a code to my room, so I asked my mom how they got it, and she apologized and said that she gave it to them "just in case," but she didn't know they'd come up.

It was a couple years later that I really confronted her about why in the world she gave internet strangers my room code, and she replied with an exasperated, "Is it such a crime to want to show off my grandbaby??"

She's not coming this time.

Oh my goodness! That's just not okay on so many levels. Yes it's a crime! Or at least it should be.
My mom has made me HATE the word grandbaby. Everyone who needs to know about my pregnancy knows. She posted it on Facebook one day and one of my close friends took a screen shot and sent it to me. (I don't have facebook) After I specifically told her NO facebook. So I made her delete it. Now every time she texts me it's "when can I announce my grandbaby" I would reply with to who? Because 1 or 2 people that I don't know, sure go ahead. But she says "I don't know, everyone" so I say "sooo facebook?" and she goes "well yeah"
WELL NO! My child isn't going to be an easy way for you to get "likes" on a status and so people can congratulate you! Go away woman!

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I regret almost every day signing my MIL up for facebook. She shares my statuses and photos, comments on "her" babies (my kids), etc.

She would say she doesn't know how to delete... Annoying!

...and then I remembered I knew her password, as I had set up the account.

Ahh Facebook! That's another thing my MIL is crazy on. I updated a status once saying "some people should not be allowed to have Facebook.." And she comments hope you don't mean me with a crying face..well if you think it's about you then obviously you know you're annoying!

I was nice enough to let my MIL and M come to an appointment to hear the heartbeat-- baby had been stubborn before so at that appointment I got to hear the heartbeat for the first time along with them and my MIL goes and updates her status about it. Like hello its my child. Like I wouldn't want to share that news myself!??!? And if I didn't, it's not your place to share it!! Ugh

Snapdragon750 · December 2014

a316b said:

AlwaysLastZZ said:

Snapdragon750 said:

@AlwaysLastZZ I don't have a good relationship with my mother either, for similar reasons (though less extreme--I lived with my dad, and her dude wasn't a convict), and when I got pregnant with DD1 she also started acting like we were best friends. My mistake was that I was excited to have someone else as excited by the pregnancy as I was, so I indulged her and called her a lot about it, and since she is so obsessed with babies I figured she'd be a good person to have around when I had DD, so she stayed with us for 3 weeks.

BIG mistake. I have many complaints, but the worst was this: She had an internet friend that she made on a forum discussing a 24 hour owl webcam (I KNOW) who lived in the area, and she wanted to use the opportunity to meet up with her while I was in the hospital. She said owl lady was going to meet her in the hospital's restaurant so they could hang out. Okay, I don't care. Next thing I know, owl lady and her daughter are walking unannounced (to me, at least) into my hospital room and want to hold the baby. Truth be told I was in such a post-birth haze that I don't even remember how I handled this, and it wasn't until many weeks later that I realized how bizarre and inappropriate it was. There was a code to my room, so I asked my mom how they got it, and she apologized and said that she gave it to them "just in case," but she didn't know they'd come up.

It was a couple years later that I really confronted her about why in the world she gave internet strangers my room code, and she replied with an exasperated, "Is it such a crime to want to show off my grandbaby??"

She's not coming this time.

Oh my goodness! That's just not okay on so many levels. Yes it's a crime! Or at least it should be.
My mom has made me HATE the word grandbaby. Everyone who needs to know about my pregnancy knows. She posted it on Facebook one day and one of my close friends took a screen shot and sent it to me. (I don't have facebook) After I specifically told her NO facebook. So I made her delete it. Now every time she texts me it's "when can I announce my grandbaby" I would reply with to who? Because 1 or 2 people that I don't know, sure go ahead. But she says "I don't know, everyone" so I say "sooo facebook?" and she goes "well yeah"
WELL NO! My child isn't going to be an easy way for you to get "likes" on a status and so people can congratulate you! Go away woman!

------
Quote fail
------
I regret almost every day signing my MIL up for facebook. She shares my statuses and photos, comments on "her" babies (my kids), etc.

She would say she doesn't know how to delete... Annoying!

...and then I remembered I knew her password, as I had set up the account.

Don't get me started on FB. My mom asked me if she should get a fb page. I said no way, but she got one anyway. I said I wouldn't friend her, she says fine and friends DH who didn't want to ignore her because he's too nice and it was back when we were just dating so he didn't know her yet. I ended up friending her, but her posts made me so angry that I unfollowed her. I think she figured it out, because now she tags me in her posts, for like no reason at all.

kaynix21 · December 2014

So mine is my own parents....

Mom has been throwing a for about me coming home for Christmas. They live in California, I live in Hawaii.

At some point we decided either they would come here or I would go there. But my mom absolutely doesn't want to come here because she'd miss going to her sister's for Christmas brunch. (PS haven't spent Christmas w/ my family in 3 years).

So I finally say ok I'll look into flights and come home (I don't want to go home) but it'll make my mom happy, I just have to check prices. So she says no worries I have miles, we got your flight. (Sweet)

Three days later we're discussing this and she's like well we never agreed to you coming home and you're busy and have commitments so I guess we'll just deal with it and come to you (being a martyr). Gets into a big tiff and hangs up on me.

2 days later decides I should just stay here by myself (hubby will be gone) and they'll stay there. Fine whatever I can deal.

Then I talked to my dad who says she is just being pissy because I don't want to come home. And I'm like I agreed to because I'm an adult and can compromise unlike the rest of you. Told him how much flights were and he's like well that's sort of a lot of money for you to come home for a couple days, maybe if you were staying for like 10 it would be worth it.

So I'm giving you people what you want, and now you've changed your mind? And I don't wanna go home in the first place let alone 10 days and have to pay someone to watch my pets for that long.

Me myself and I will have a fine Christmas without you crazy people tyvm!

MrsPDX · December 2014

maggiet19 said:

MrsPDX said:

I surprisingly don't have any, other than on Monday (which I already ranted about in Monday's Bitchfest) MIL texted me about how stressful her day was, but how excited she was because she got a letter from DH...and I didn't have a letter. Then I told her that, and she was like oh well, he seems fine.

They really could care less about me, this pregnancy, and how I am doing it all alone (including birth). They only care about DH, who is their eldest and golden child. Oh and they expect them to pick him up from the airport during his leave AND go to their house first. YEAH right!

This is why my husband does not tell anyone but me he is coming home on leave. The only life that is totally disrupted during deployment is mine and our DD. I understand other people may miss their loved one, but their lives do not change when my husband leaves. Stick to your guns!

Exactly! They don't seem to understand why I feel my life has changed with him gone. Like he is some boyfriend who I am weak in the knees for, no he is my husband, and we now are going to have a child together! They think their life is affected a ton of course, but DH hasn't lived with them in about 6 years. Deep down he is still a child in their brain, which is a root cause for many issues....

gkrenzel · December 2014

I just got an evite from MIL to an after Christmas family day on DH's side. Sledding at the ski hill, pizza and afterwards dessert and games at our house. Ummmm, really? I didn't know we agreed to hosting 15+ people the day after Christmas. Not to mention our house is nowhere near large enough to accommodate that many aunts, uncles, cousins etc.
Neither of us were informed of this, wasn't even planning on going to the whole thing because I don't feel comfortable sledding while pregnant ARGH.

kaynix21 · December 2014

@alwayslastzz yeah I will. I'll probably cuddle with my pets and watch movies. And our battalion is having a party for the ladies who are staying home alone, so that'll take up my afternoon which will be nice.

smashbaby111 · December 2014

@captianleela I wish I was kidding, this lady is nuts! I'm almost impressed at how much she is making this baby about her. She mentioned the other day that she would need to reorganize her kitchen cabinets to accommodate all the bottles, baby food maker, baby dishes, bibs etc for this baby and how nice it was for these people to pass this stuff on to her for the baby. Then she asked if I felt I was prepared for this baby as she was... Umm, I'm only 17 weeks, how prepared does she think I should be?! Plus she is only (over) prepared because she middle-manned all these hand me downs and kept them for herself, lol

a316b · December 2014

SIL asked me to make cake for her baby shower. Sure. It's this weekend. 150 people. A little time consuming, but ok. Now my DS is sick (103+ fever) and my mom has been helping me with the cake while DH and my dad take care of the kids.

SIL texts me an hour ago to "not worry about the cake- we will pursue other options".

Wtf? It's half made! I just need to finish decorating this 3 tiered monstrosity! Don't you dare buy more desserts!

DH is more upset that she just realized how much she was asking of me, after cake was half done.

KellyFM522 · December 2014

@a316b‌ 150 person baby shower?! WTF?

thegabymama · December 2014

smashbaby111 said:
@captianleela I wish I was kidding, this lady is nuts! I'm almost impressed at how much she is making this baby about her. She mentioned the other day that she would need to reorganize her kitchen cabinets to accommodate all the bottles, baby food maker, baby dishes, bibs etc for this baby and how nice it was for these people to pass this stuff on to her for the baby. Then she asked if I felt I was prepared for this baby as she was... Umm, I'm only 17 weeks, how prepared does she think I should be?! Plus she is only (over) prepared because she middle-manned all these hand me downs and kept them for herself, lol

I can't even comprehend this. That's some crazy shit. My MIL and Mom are both far more concerned that we will have everything we need, as it should be! Neither has mentioned their own plans, although I hope they do get some things so we can easily spend time at their houses or even let the LO have a visit with his grandparents sometime. I hope you guys get some wonderful stuff despite her selfishness!

masonsmomandmaybaby · December 2014

thats insanity! You've got to nip that in the butt right now or you will have some major boundary issues once baby gets here. My mil also wanted a nursery. It was crazy. I was going to breastfeed so of course the baby can't go away at night. Plus I didn't want him too. Dh finally convinced her she was being cray cray. But we had SO many issues once son was born. She would say things like he was "her baby and only here due to her" wtf! She would stop by whenever she wanted and get pissed if I wanted her to come over with fil and not make us have visitors for 6hrs a day! It was a rough first couple of months. So my point assert your place now and stand up to that woman! I wish I had. It will be hard but will make your life easier later. A grandmothers shower is bs!

masonsmomandmaybaby · December 2014

I seriously cannot figure out why I can't ever reply. That's for smashbaby

smashbaby111 · December 2014

@masonsmomandmaybaby‌ and @thegabymama‌
I pretty much just laugh it off most of the time since she is definitely nuts, it's gives me lots of material to share with friends, they are always asking for the MIL update and the most ridiculous thing she had done lately. It's usually funny to me how ridiculous she is but sometimes gets on my nerves before I can vent and then brush it off.
I can't control what she does in her own home but I can control when I allow her to come visit and control when this baby visits there (I will definitely be a punk and make sure she gets no use out of all that stuff she insists she needs). Luckily hubby is totally on my side with everything so even though we usually just let her be, I know I have back up when I need it.

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