Baby fussier when Dad isn't home? — The Bump
Babies: 0 - 3 Months

Baby fussier when Dad isn't home?

Does anyone else notice this or is it just coincidence for me? Monday nights my DH works an overnight shift for his job  (which he just started 4 weeks ago). My LO is 10 weeks old. For the last 4 weeks my LO has screamed her head off on Monday nights. Every other day of the week she is perfect.  Also last night DH left to do some errands. While he was gone, she screamed again. He gets home and she stops. Is this a coincidence? I didn't really think a baby this age could prefer one parent over the other, but she seems to like DH more. Maybe I am getting more stressed when he leaves and she is picking up on it? I don't know, I am totally stumped!

Re: Baby fussier when Dad isn't home?

  • I feel the same way. It's like he knows dh's schedule and starts to be a pita come a certain time. My lo is only 4 weeks. Granted I think it's more of just a bewitching hour to try and annoy his mother and he probably knows I am also waiting and wanting dh home.
  •  I have six kids and let me tell you- Dad is the magic person who fixes all!
     LOL, not really, but yes my kids all settled down for Daddy very well. This baby too-he gets to hold her while I'm making dinner, she loves it and it keeps her happy while I am busy. He loves it too :)
  • My LO is almost two months old and gets so excited when Daddy comes home! I think he likes the change of pace after a whole day of spending time with only me. Quite honestly, I'm sure he gets sick of only hearing my voice and seeing my face for ten hours!

    I don't think this has anything to do with your baby preferring or liking your husband more than you, so don't feel bad or take it personally. I ran a bunch of errands the other day and left my LO with his dad; when I came home, he brightened up for me like he does for my husband when he gets home from work. 

  • My LO is the exact opposite.  My husband works out of town 3 days a week.  During those 3 days, my LO is the best baby; rarely cries, sleeps for 6 hours at a time (only 4 weeks old) at night, and is calm throughout the day.  As soon as my husband gets home on Friday evenings, LO goes into a crying fit for the rest of the night.  My husband is really high strung and I think LO picks up on that.
  • Yes I am breastfeeding, but she won't take the breast and it's typically after she eats. I think alot has to with my stress levels looking back at it. I think I am stressed bc I am trying to get my 3 year old ready for bed and the baby starts to cry and DH isn't there to help and she just spirals.

    Also pretty much since birth the baby has fought sleep like no other. She never wants to miss a thing. She gets tired and just melts down. 
  • You're not alone but I bet it's a combination. My little one has a magical Daddy radar, she wakes up within about an hour of when he gets home (he works overnights) and nurses and it's like as soon as he gets in the door she is ready for him and wants to play. Even if she is dead asleep and doesn't hear him come in the door and make those noises, as soon as she hears his voice her entire body lights up. DH and I have gone through a LOT of effort to make sure she bonded to him strongly even though I was BFing, and it looks like that worked.

    Also I know when DH is gone for long stretches and I am on my own with her, I start to feel exhausted and perceive that she is more fussy with me. I know she screams at him too, but because I'm alone that helpless feeling of not being able to "fix" the baby compounds.

    If it really is a Daddy issue though, maybe try cuddling her with one of his shirts from the previous day, or putting on a dab of his cologne. One night when I was at my wits end I cuddled my LO in her daddy's sleep shirt and it made a difference. (Or at least it seemed to.)
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Hmmm... Our little guy is actually fussier when Dad IS home. (Or at least he was for a while.) It's weird too because DH is the only one who can calm him down when he's having a colic fit. Maybe he's saving it all day until DH gets home and then he thinks, "Sweet I can cry now because Dad is here to do that super bouncy thing that makes my tummy feel better." Who knows?




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