Sex Check In

a5swanson · November 2014

I know we had a poll earlier, but I just was curious how everyone is doing with the boom boom in the bedroom. I feel awful and am embarrassed to admit it...

DH and I haven't had sex since BFP at the end of September!!! We had quite a bit up to that point, but I started feeling awful and like sex was the last thing I wanted. I think DH is freaked out about it a bit too because he's only asked about it a few times and really hasn't pushed it. I think that's mostly because he's supportive, but knowing him I think he'd be thinking about not hurting the baby and not sex during sex, yknow?

STMs, when did you find your libido came back from the dead? I feel awful about it!

luvindanimals · November 2014

After a a 63 day dry spell we finally did it. I actually enjoyed it! Then because we waited so long there was some pinkish discharge that only lasted a day. Also I was rather sore in my uterus area.
I recommend to all that feel up to it to go for it though. Once your bellies get too big it gets hard to find comfortable positions. Once you have the baby you are out of commission for 6-8 weeks.
Once you can have sex again it may not feel great for a while. So live it up now!

effthisnoise · November 2014

We've only had sex three times since the BFP. My only recommendation is anytime that you aren't feeling sick, just go for it even if you're not really interested. Hopefully after a little foreplay you get interested and have a good time.

Apollo11235 · November 2014

We've done it three times since the BFP, I think... once early on, followed by some pink discharge and a hiatus until after we saw Peanut on u/s, then twice since then, in the last couple weeks.

brody624 · November 2014

We were having sex like normal 3-4 times a week after our BFP, but around week 6 MS hit, and it's been almost nonexistent since. I think we've had sex 3 MAYBE 4 times since week 6. Mind you, this sex isn't fun, it's more because I feel guilty so I just lay there...

katier29 · November 2014

Before the pregnancy we had sex almost everyday if not multiple times. And now it's a couple times a week, I think we both have calmed down just cause we had a little blood one time after but none since. And we have been super busy with house renovations.

awheeler4311 · November 2014

Oh my god this makes me feel so much better. I was being really hard on myself for not being able to get it together!! We have had sex maybe 3 times since BFP and before that it was at least a few times a week. It feels weird to not be having sex... My husband hasn't put on any moves and my hormones kicked in and it upset me but he said he knows I feel horrible. We are going on a baby moon this weekend so I'm hoping we can light some spark back!! FX

Stormy61 · November 2014

We have sex about once a week. My nausea is usually later in the day so it has to be early morning sexy time for us or he can forget about it.

a5swanson · November 2014

That's it! We are doing it tonight! Hahaha I need to break the cycle once and for all!

dkleid · November 2014

We are on average once a week. Except for when we were on vacation then it was once a day! My sex drive has decreased but nothing to the point of me not wanting it at all.

[Deleted User] · November 2014

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blu-eyedwife · November 2014

Last time around the sex was beyond fantastic, so I was really looking forward to that again. And I started to worry because it's been "normal" and I was trying to remember if the amazing sex kicked in second trimester. And then this weekend happened. Whatever switch flips, has flipped. And so sex is going to be a lot more frequent.

gilder40 · November 2014

I feel a lot better about our situation too!! Between worrying about little tater tot, husband working holiday hours, husband also finishing his last semester of school (yay!!), and me feeling sick....sex has been non-existent for a while!! I'm 12 weeks today, so I'm hoping everything settled down and we get back to "normal" soon!!

lnzu · November 2014

Over the last two weeks (weeks 8-10) my libido has been crazy during my sleep. I've parlayed that into early morning sex which seems to put DH in a great mood. If I have sex before my body has a chance to tell me how naseaus I feel, it seems like it keeps the morning sickness away for a little longer.

brody624 · November 2014

lnzu said:

Over the last two weeks (weeks 8-10) my libido has been crazy during my sleep. I've parlayed that into early morning sex which seems to put DH in a great mood. If I have sex before my body has a chance to tell me how naseaus I feel, it seems like it keeps the morning sickness away for a little longer.

I've had crazy sex dreams and I wake up ready to go, but I might be married to the only man in the world who does not like morning sex. He is not a morning person in general, but it's definitely put a damper on those mornings when I want to play, then by the time he's ready to play I'm sick.

lnzu · November 2014

brody624 said:

lnzu said:

Over the last two weeks (weeks 8-10) my libido has been crazy during my sleep. I've parlayed that into early morning sex which seems to put DH in a great mood. If I have sex before my body has a chance to tell me how naseaus I feel, it seems like it keeps the morning sickness away for a little longer.

I've had crazy sex dreams and I wake up ready to go, but I might be married to the only man in the world who does not like morning sex. He is not a morning person in general, but it's definitely put a damper on those mornings when I want to play, then by the time he's ready to play I'm sick.

Boo! Boo on him! He's missing out. :P

brody624 · November 2014

lnzu you're telling me!

littlechemist · November 2014

We held off after BFP for a couple of weeks just to be sure things were ok. Since then, we've been averaging around 1-2x per week, which is on the low side of normal for us. We kind of wore ourselves out TTC when we were going once every other day, so I don't think the break was too bad. The sex has been good for both of us, so thankfully no complaints there.

Enjoying it while we can and while it's still comfortable!

blastocarrier30 · November 2014

We had some of the TTC burn out, too. After our BFP we took a couple of weeks off, mostly because I usually felt gross in the evenings (tired and bloaty and heartburny). It still isn't super regular, but now that I'm hitting an upswing in energy, I'm hoping it'll pick up a little more.

Being late to work this morning was totally worth it

ETA: better words.

ChrisLipstick · November 2014

We had sex normally (twice a week- ish) until my MS got really bad. Now I don't want to be touched or really to smell DH. I am sure things will get better as the second trimester starts (at least that is what happened last time).

darvo · November 2014

This has been a good read-- we used to have sex A LOT, like daily or every other day. But I just feel so sick and miserable! It's so similar to having the flu. DH hasn't pushed the issue at all, but I feel guilty. This made me feel less alone in this. Thanks ladies! Hopefully second trimester will bring sexy back.

Belle0720 · November 2014

We've kept up with about 2-3 times a week. Even if I'm not super into it, I do it for him--just obviously not on days when I've been feeling super crappy. I feel like it will be harder to make time for it once we have kids so I want to make sure we're making it happen regularly while we still can!

ksimo6 · November 2014

I'm taking it for the team at this point. Weekly but I am not interested at all... My husband has to initiate. Poor guy.

atj13ne · November 2014

We are currently having sex mostly every day. I havent had much nausea and a month before this i was hardly giving it up bc I was so exhausted and moody. My SO was a bit concerned as well, lately I have been feeling a bit more sexual, so I agree, if you aren feeling like total shit, try to do it, bc soon enough it Will be difficult. Also...if you cam stomach it and just realllly arent in the mood, oral is always an option?? This works for me when im just totally not into sex.

avazirian · November 2014

I have like no sex drive we have done it a couple times but I have no sex drive it takes longer to get in the mood

kerrymarie44 · November 2014

What is this "sex" you speak of??

poor DH

fran3514 · November 2014

We still fuck like we did at the start so nothing has changed for us

Karissa764 · November 2014

I don't even remeber what sex is anymore. Turns out dry heaving isn't all that sexy

nf0kss · November 2014

So clearly I'm In the minority. My libido is off the chain since we found out and I'm the one always attacking SO. He turns me down. Just my luck I'd be one of those prego ladies. I'd do it everyday if he'd let us.

brody624 · November 2014

atj13ne said:
We are currently having sex mostly every day. I havent had much nausea and a month before this i was hardly giving it up bc I was so exhausted and moody. My SO was a bit concerned as well, lately I have been feeling a bit more sexual, so I agree, if you aren feeling like total shit, try to do it, bc soon enough it Will be difficult. Also...if you cam stomach it and just realllly arent in the mood, oral is always an option?? This works for me when im just totally not into sex.

I can't brush my teeth without gagging or throwing up. Oral is not an option for me.

heatheremanderson · November 2014

We are pretty regular. 2 times weekly although I will admit mostly on weekends when neither of us are working. I have a tendancy of passing out by 8pm most nights and we are both out the door by 630 am or 7 am so morning romps just won't work.

Thankfully DH is understanding especially if it has been a sickie day and my back is killing me because I was praying to the porcelain god that day.

kgille921 · November 2014

Lots of trying not a lot of actual having of sex. It's not as good as it was before I got pregnant.... so annoying.

tahitiandreamin · November 2014

Sex? What's that? Between the all day nausea that is worse in the evenings, extreme fatigue and a preschooler who doesn't like to sleep there hasn't been anything going on here since baby making sex. I remember last pregnancy that by the time I hit ~7 weeks even with the nausea I felt like a rabbit. The crazy erotic dreams started in the first tri as well. This time.... Nothing. I need to feel a bit more like myself before I can imagine having sex.

willowprincess · November 2014

Since I've been on zofran I've been able to handle 2-3 times a week. Just hoping this morning sickness wears off soon and we can get our sex life back to normal.

carolyngrace · November 2014

Twice a week... And that has been mostly oral & mutual masturbation (always a great option if you're feeling super lazy). When we do have sex it's been great, it's just having the energy for it... Like others have said, DH hasn't been pushing the issue much at all, which has been surprising. Guess he's just giving me space to feel crappy!

I'msorrymsjackson · November 2014

Ugh. I'd been away for a week and when I came back the jet lag and normal pregnancy exhaustion had me out of commission for another few days, but I finally gave in last night. And can i just say...it wasn't good. It's normally very good and had been pretty good the once a week we were averaging post bfp but pre-international business trip, but last night I was nearly in tears. Not because of pain (there was some pain but not severe) but just because I couldn't really stand the contact. I had to tell him to stop kissing me so much and I just couldn't wait for him to be done. And then I was so sad for feeling that way.

Hoping it gets better...

DolphinLover2002 · November 2014

threearrows said:
Sadly, we haven't since my BFP either---but, mainly because I spend most evenings curled up in the fetal position on the couch, consumed with nausea and hoping I won't have to run to the bathroom to throw up. My morning sickness is most definitely evening sickness...it doesn't really lend itself to wanting to have sex

This! Only my morning sickness is morning and evening sickness. Twins gives me the double whammy! Can't wait to start feeling better.

Synnovus · November 2014

We just try to have sex as often as possible (opting for 4-5 times a week as before bfp) which mean it depends a lot on my day (ms/fatigue)his workload (both job and at home) and mostly if our DS is sleeping or not... Thankfully my libido is still the same!

alygator11687 · November 2014

Once a week... Only because I feel guilty. It doesn't feel great for me which is sad! I'm hoping it gets better soon!

kristaB1989 · November 2014

I am so happy that I am not the only one! I was feeling bad for my poor husband. But honestly, I have not been in the mood. I feel bloated, fat, my boobs hurt so bad, I'm moody and tired. Not to mention we have had opposite work schedules for a few weeks now. I do not want a quicky at lunch, thank you. Lol! No sex for us. I'm hoping that will change (for his sake) and I'm sure it will soon!

mscandace7 · November 2014

I hate sex! It feels like a job/chore at this point. Husband rants about not getting it! When he does get it, I lay there, READY for it to be over with! It doesn't help that it hurts and his groping and complaining about how he feels everyday! My husband is the lovey dovey type and I'm like please get away from me! My boobs hurt and I'm extremely tired! My dreams are great cause he doesn't talk! Hopefully I'll get over this cause I'm miserable!

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