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Pregnant after a Loss
QuigleyCat1
member
XP: I think the time has come :( (long)
QuigleyCat1
member
*DS mentioned
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Hello my beautiful friends. I want to apologize because I've been extremely absent on the boards lately and it's not because I'm too busy or because I don't care. It's because I've been trying to get up the courage to finally say goodbye. :,) This is very hard for me. TTCAL, TTCAL+6, PgAL, and my month boards have all been a part of me for the past three years and somewhat of a "home" to me. I don't take saying goodbye lightly. I have been given courage, strength, love, laughs and most importantly, support from all of you. I can only hope that I've given a sliver of that back to you all. There isn't a day that has gone by that I don't stop and remember what you all did for me with the Sunshine Mission. We all still use things purchased with the gift cards and so forth. I still look through all of my cards and trinkets from time to time that I keep in a special box along with Liam's hand and footprints. As you know, he will be remembered for our lifetime.
As for my husband and I...we are okay and settled with the fact of no more TTC. He knows that if it ever crosses his mind that he has promised to have that conversation. I think (at least for me) many moms keep that door open if but for the tiniest bit. I do not expect our minds to change and in fact I am very much alright with continuing our lives just as we are. In the last several months I've felt myself let go of the expectation. It no longer rules my life. It is something that I will never forget yearning for. It will always be a part of me. It'll always be my "what if". But if that's my ONLY "what if", then I think I may be in for a very sad future. I don't want to be sad forever. I want to enjoy my little family and all of my friends with no regrets. I have to! And what's more is that I WANT to enjoy it! Just a few weeks ago we adopted a retired racing greyhound. Her name is Punzie and, along with my DH, DS and Biscuit, has brought me so much joy. She is not a replacement for anyone or anything, but instead she is a focus for us and a very bright spot in our lives. I told my husband that I felt the need to rescue something, anything because I couldn't save Liam. Punzie provided me that opportunity. She's so sweet and we love her so much. 
So our family is complete with humans and non-humans! And we step forward to what our future holds for us.....
As for those of you who have ever supported me I can never repay you. Your words and actions have shown me what life is about. It's about being there for those who are in need. I promise to pay this forward in whatever ways that I can. I don't know how to hit the Post Discussion button to finalize these thoughts. 
I know that I'll check in from time to time and chime in, but I wanted to say a proper goodbye because this is no longer where I "belong". I owed it to you all to gather the courage for this post. I've come so very far from when we lost Liam, and it is largely due to these boards. So I thank you from the bottom of my heart, EACH AND EVERYONE OF YOU! There were even some of you that went above and beyond...you know who you are...and I love you. Now I'm crying so I think that's my signal to hit the Post Discussion button.
You are all in my constant prayers for whatever life is holding for you. 
Always on my mind, forever in my heart you all will be..........
***BFP 1-22-13, baby boy dx with Trisomy 13 at 15 weeks.
We let him go to Heaven on 4-27-13 at 17 weeks 1 day***
This discussion has been closed.
Re: XP: I think the time has come :( (long)
Began trying for a baby January 2012
BFP 4.25.2013 EDD 1.3.2014 MMC 6.3.2013 D&C 6.19.2013
BFP 11.3.2013 CP 11.6.2013
BFP 3.31.2014 EDD 12.10.2014 Baby boy Carlson born 12.19.2014
(((hugs))) dear. Glad you have come to a point of peace with your decision.
Of course, you are always welcome here, but wish you the best in your adventures IRL moving forward.
You are an incredible person and we are always here for you.
MAY '15 DEC. SIGGY CHALLENGE- FAV. CHRISTMAS MOVIE
Dating- 3/1/1999 ~ Married- 10/10/2004
DD#1- Sweet Pea ~ Born on her Due Date 3/1/2007
DD#2- Pumpkin ~ Due 9/29/2010 Arrived 10/1/2010
~ BFP: 6/12/2013 EDD: 2/21/2014 NT Scan: 8/5/2013 (11w3d) MMC D&C: 8/8/2013 ~
~BFP: 3/15/2014 EDD: 11/24/2014 CP 4 weeks 4 days ~
~BFP: 7/2/2014 EDD: 3/15/2015 CP 4 weeks ~
~BFP: 8/31/2014 EDD: 5/10/2015
*All are Welcome*
My Chart
BFP #1 - 6-2009 - edd 1-23-10 - mmc - discovered by u/s @ 13wks 2days - D&C
BFP #2 - 10-15-2010 - Baby boy born 6-11-11
BFP#3 - 6-2013 - edd 2-21-14 -mmc discovered by u/s @ 9 wks - D&C
BFP #4 - 3-10-14 - edd 11-19-14 - natural miscarriage 4-10-14
BFP #5 - 8-24-14 - edd 5-5-15 - Please be our RAINBOW!!!
U/S 9-30 - baby measuring right on track, heart rate of 155bpm
U/S 10-8 & 10-14 - baby is growing perfectly!
10-20 - 151 bpm 10-31 153 bpm
11-13 IT'S A BOY!!!!!
TTC since March 2012
BFP #1 1/29/13, EDD 10/9/13
BFP #3 8/11/14 EDD 4/22/14
You're such an inspiring woman. I can only imagine how amazing you must be IRL. I can honestly say I don't think I know anybody who has as much courage and who is as open as you are with everything.
So much happiness, love, best wishes and peace being sent to you and your family.
BFP#4 3/17/14 - rainbow Baby BOY arrived 11/10/14 !!
DX: Uterine Septum - Resection 9/5/13 || MTHFR Hetero A1298C || My Chart
March 2014: first medicated cycle + iui = BFP!
BFP #2: EDD 9/3/13~~Slow HB at 1st U/S~~MMC -Loss on 2/13/13
BFP #2: m/c at 7w, February, 2014
BFP #3: It's a BOY! Please be our rainbow! Due February, 2015
*everyone always welcome*
We also have a retired racer, so I know exactly how much they steal your heart. We're contemplating getting a second--it's hard to stop at one!
Sending lots of ((hugs)) your way.
***Losses mentioned.*** TTC #1 since May 2012. Me: 37, OH: 41. Ectopic August 2012 => tubal damage.
EDD 5/2/14, NMC 9/11/13
EDD 10/15/14, CP 2/8/14
IF Diagnosis: PCOS, MFI
Current Cycle: 5 mg Femara/1000mg Metformin + TI = BFP, EDD 4/23/15 Please be our RAINBOW
**ALL AL/IF Welcome**
My Chart