April 2015 Moms

Bad Grandmother

Hi mommies,


Tbh sometimes I am worried about my mom. I feel like she's not as excited as she should be. I mean I am carrying her first grandchild. She just seems concerned with what she has going on. I am currently 17 weeks and 3 days. I feel like I should she her taking some steps to prepare. Maybe even show more enthusiasm than what's currently displayed. I feel like she should prepare or maybe be the Grandmother who is constantly checking up. And when she does check up, it doesn't feel genuine. Make I'm just expecting too much. What do you women think? How is your mom reacting? Am I expecting too much?
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Re: Bad Grandmother

  • Yeah, I'm 19 weeks and my mother has done nothing. Possibly because she knows there is not a lot you do to prepare for a new baby. Don't worry about it.
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  • The only thing my mom has done is buy a pair of baby booties at the Dollar General the day I found out I was pregnant. I don't think grandparents have much prep to do. She also might not be showing her excitement to you. I know that my dad loves babies. If our friends come over with their baby, he has it the whole time. I know he's excited to have grandchildren but he doesn't show the excitement to me. My mom has said they've had conversations about their upcoming grandchild, but he doesn't in any way show it to me.
    BFP 8/9/2014
    Baby Boy wolowizard due 4/14/2015
    Greyson Robert
  • I LOVE my mom and she's amazing but she's done absolutely nothing so far. I mean we talk on a regular basis but not all baby all the time.
    You're expecting too much.
    Plus you're only 17 weeks there's plenty of time left to prepare...
  • I missed us getting called mean!  Boo.
    Together since 5.16.05 (16 & 19yo)
    Married since 3.6.10 (21 & 24yo)
    Baby Olivia coming 4.14.15 <3 (26 & 29yo)

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  • jk3610jk3610 member
    edited November 2014
    Just caught up.  I remembered the screenname but have been away from the mothership for a few hours.  Nice.
    Together since 5.16.05 (16 & 19yo)
    Married since 3.6.10 (21 & 24yo)
    Baby Olivia coming 4.14.15 <3 (26 & 29yo)

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  • What exactly do you expect her to be doing? Buying you presents? Fawning over you?
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  • My mom hasn't done anything yet. I haven't either. You are expecting too much IMO.
  • What could your mom possibly be preparing for as a grandmother? 
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  • RHoPA1109 said:


    SMFB said:

    Calling your mother a bad grandma because she's not coddling you? A grown woman. You need to reevaluate your expectations otherwise no one will ever live up to what you expect and you will be in a world of butthurt.



    Calling her a grown woman is giving her a lot of credit, I'm calling teen mom on this one.

    I think you're right. But still...
  • My mom hasn't done anything to prepare, and I don't expect her to. SO's mom didn't even acknowledge the pregnancy when we told her (she got up and started doing the dishes. I already ranted about this in a post a couple weeks ago).

    I wouldn't worry about it until after the baby is born. If she shows no interest or enthusiasm then, then I would worry.

    FTM & TEAM BLUE!!!

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  • bsdubbsdub member
    edited November 2014

    I see your "teen mom" @RHoPA1109‌ and @rsaj0807‌, and raise you "it's probably a teenage boy". Any ladies I know wouldn't talk to a group of strangers, let alone pregnant women like that. No grace, no tact, no dignity. Yuck.

    Maybe her fiancé took her phone and decided to post on her behalf. I call that next post is a baby name post. Just so you know OP we don't give a fuck about what you name your baby either.

    Edit cuz I got too excited and didn't spell check!
  • mrsjack53 said:

    @kurban627‌ I completely agree with both of your posts. Can I give you advice a kind bump member gave me? Change your avatar to something personalized. :) I know I can't help but think it is a troll/SS when I see a generic avatar (I don't think I'm alone on this opinion either). Plus it helps us recognize you. People are more likely to look at your picture than your name!

    I'll try to do that. I only have ever used the app on my phone and I can't ever get photos to work. I'll log on to my computer sometime soon and give it a whirl. Thanks for the advice.
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  • It's all about meeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
  • rsaj0807 said:

    @jk3610‌ I stand corrected. She only called us inconsiderate, not mean. But, our negativity won't prevent her from posting future questions... in succession, one after the other.

    OP, I think you have princess syndrome. You're expecting the world to stop and revolve around you because you're pregnant. Honey, life doesn't work that way. Bless your poor little heart.

    I told my mom that I was having some serious complications, but she was too busy to talk. I told her on Monday. She just called back today. My feelings were hurt, but did I start a thread and ask everyone to feel sorry for me? No.

    Get over yourself.

    Side note: @rsaj0807‌ , sorry to hear you're having complications (if you mentioned this somewhere, I missed it, sorry) and extra sorry your mom didn't have time to discuss your fears with you. I hope you had support elsewhere during that time!

    I know you weren't looking for hair petting, but things hit me sometimes...
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  • MaMa~MoOrEMaMa~MoOrE member
    edited November 2014
    Ugh GIF fail :( I hate mobile!
  • I haven't done anything to prepare yet and neither has my mom. The only thing she's really done is buy me pizza (probably a bit too often but c'mon you can't say no to pizza). I don't expect her to do anything either, it's not her baby it's mine. She doesn't HAVE to do anything.


  • I haven't done anything to prepare yet and neither has my mom. The only thing she's really done is buy me pizza (probably a bit too often but c'mon you can't say no to pizza). I don't expect her to do anything either, it's not her baby it's mine. She doesn't HAVE to do anything.

    Wow, that is one good mom. Seriously. I want my mom to buy me pizza too often.


    Haha it's mainly because she's trying to find a pizza place with good gluten free pizza, so she buys me my own so I don't feel "left out" or "go hungry". Bless her heart :) :x
  • My mum has done nothing but give me text messages of advice to which I have to point out that I've done this part before ... Nothing special. But what do you want your mum to start preparing for ?? Set her house up as a daycare so you can go shopping , tanning or having your nails done when ever ? Bit childish to think she has to do any work, your baby, your choice to have it , your responsibility
  • @autumnjay777‌ I think you should be happy you have your mother. Time to put things in perspective!

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  • My mother has purchased a few items if clothing out if pure excitement but that by no means she is " preparing " for baby. I think you are expecting way to much. This is your child, not hers.
  • I think my mom's excitement is stemming more from the relief that her 37 year old daughter is NOT going to be a forever spinster. She will be a great grandma and lives nearby, but her duties don't start now.
  • My mom and my MIL are both thrilled about my baby but haven't bought anything yet. They have ideas for the presents they want to give but since LO isn't due until April there's absolutely no need for them to start buying things yet (there never would be, it's not their baby but they want to). Heck, I've only bought the pair of shoes we used in our announcement picture. They both call me occasionally as they always have and yes, the baby comes up but it's not the sole focus of our conversations.

    Anniversary




  • My mom was like this my first pregnancy.  Turns out she had experienced a loss that she never really talked about with me, so she was just being cautious and trying not to get too excited.  She checked up on me but mostly I think it was out of concern and not excitement.  It took me a while to understand what her perspective was.  She just wanted to protect me from anything bad.  She was considerably more excited as I got closer to the due date and was over the moon when DD was born. 

    Factor V Leiden Homozygous, Advanced Maternal Age

     

    TTC #1, 5 yrs, PCOS, Femera + Ovidrel.

    IUI#3 BFP, DD 5/31/2012

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  • don't let all the negative comments you have been getting make you feel bad for wanting your mom to be excited to have a first grandbaby, Im also giving my mom her first grandbaby and she loves discussing what she all wants to get for her home for when we come over she even wants her own car seat for my child, she showed up at my home with a crib and dresser, it was second hand but absolutely beautiful, she is always looking out for things for me and baby, sometimes I think she is more excited then I am she is absolutely amazing and there is nothing wrong with wanting to share excitement with your mom
  • PrpljadePrpljade member
    edited November 2014
    Edit cause wtf quote boxes?
    RHoPA1109 said:
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    BAD GRANDMOTHER
    Bad ASS grandmother!
    BFP: 8.13.2014
    EDD: 4.23.2015

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  • fatcat11188fatcat11188 member
    edited November 2014


    EDITED: My response was too nice. I clearly didn't read the 3 pages of comments.. and agree with PP's- 
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