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kayytuck · November 2014

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ngolimento · November 2014

Just a friendly FYI, asking for prayers from a mixed community is fine. Yammering about how blessed you are in front of other women who have not received good news from thier anatomy scans: not good.

Also, deciding to terminate a fatal pregnancy is a health decision, not some kind of morality yardstick. People who choose to terminate go through more heartbreak than others can fathom. Making judgments about how 'Christian' they are isn't at all Christian.

mangomimosa · November 2014

Strong Christian? Way to go, calling into question the religious and moral integrity of others who make the painful but highly sensical decision to terminate for a fatal diagnosis.

I hope the baby doesn't suffer.

ngolimento · November 2014

Damn, I forgot to QFP.

mariahd43 · November 2014

S.O.B, I missed it!

FrecklesInside · November 2014

Geeeeez, ladies!!!! No QFP?????

lynndavid6912 · November 2014

FrecklesInside said:
Geeeeez, ladies!!!! No QFP?????

Haha, this! I clicked on the post hoping for a QFP!!

ngolimento · November 2014

Well, cliff's notes are as follows:

"My poor friends have had this fatal diagnosis, and could use your prayers. I however, am blessed and am talking about myself in this post for no sane reason. Also, my friends are carrying the baby to term because they are strong Christians. Which somehow is supposed to convince you that they deserve prayers more than other people with dying children."

That's about it.

hetispagetti · November 2014

They must be messing....please tell me they are messing!!! :-/

chaysefaith · November 2014

Her OP was pretty disgusting. It really didn't need to be quoted.

Whitfry · November 2014

Blanket judgement here, but I find that the people who need to announce that they are "good Christians" typically aren't. Whereas people who just quietly go about being nice and kind in the name of the Christian religion never get noticed, because good Christians don't advertise their goodness. It's not necessary.

I find this true for all people, regardless of their faith. The ones who need to advertise their strengths by putting themselves on a pedestal tend to be a lot weaker than the people who just quietly go around not being assholes.

kcbizme · November 2014

Whitfry said:

Blanket judgement here, but I find that the people who need to announce that they are "good Christians" typically aren't. Whereas people who just quietly go about being nice and kind in the name of the Christian religion never get noticed, because good Christians don't advertise their goodness. It's not necessary.

I find this true for all people, regardless of their faith. The ones who need to advertise their strengths by putting themselves on a pedestal tend to be a lot weaker than the people who just quietly go around not being assholes.

THIS.

Shebamommy · November 2014

Whitfry said:

Blanket judgement here, but I find that the people who need to announce that they are "good Christians" typically aren't. Whereas people who just quietly go about being nice and kind in the name of the Christian religion never get noticed, because good Christians don't advertise their goodness. It's not necessary. I find this true for all people, regardless of their faith. The ones who need to advertise their strengths by putting themselves on a pedestal tend to be a lot weaker than the people who just quietly go around not being assholes.

(**breaking my rule of never discussing religion or politics on the internet**)

I could not agree with this more. The "I'M SUCH A GOOD CHRISTIAN, PAY ATTENTION TO ME BEING ALL CHRISTIAN-LIKE OVER HERE, YA'LL!!**&!!!" people of the world are often intolerant, judgmental, and clueless assholes. Chaps my ass to no end. Now, I didn't read the original post. And if her friends decided not to terminate "because they're Christian," that's fine -- that's their decision to make. But that doesn't mean that Christians can't or shouldn't terminate a pregnancy, or that anyone (Christian or not) who makes that choice is not a good or moral person. I have never been faced with that decision, but am almost certain that I would choose not to carry a terminally ill baby to term for the sake of the baby and the emotional health of my family. That doesn't make me a bad person or un-Christian-like.

ngolimento · November 2014

Shebamommy said:

Whitfry said:

Blanket judgement here, but I find that the people who need to announce that they are "good Christians" typically aren't. Whereas people who just quietly go about being nice and kind in the name of the Christian religion never get noticed, because good Christians don't advertise their goodness. It's not necessary.

I find this true for all people, regardless of their faith. The ones who need to advertise their strengths by putting themselves on a pedestal tend to be a lot weaker than the people who just quietly go around not being assholes.

(**breaking my rule of never discussing religion or politics on the internet**)

I could not agree with this more. The "I'M SUCH A GOOD CHRISTIAN, PAY ATTENTION TO ME BEING ALL CHRISTIAN-LIKE OVER HERE, YA'LL!!**&!!!" people of the world are often intolerant, judgmental, and clueless assholes. Chaps my ass to no end. Now, I didn't read the original post. And if her friends decided not to terminate "because they're Christian," that's fine -- that's their decision to make. But that doesn't mean that Christians can't or shouldn't terminate a pregnancy, or that anyone (Christian or not) who makes that choice is not a good or moral person. I have never been faced with that decision, but am almost certain that I would choose not to carry a terminally ill baby to term for the sake of the baby and the emotional health of my family. That doesn't make me a bad person or un-Christian-like.

***quote***

Seriously. If making my dying baby suffer more makes me 'more Christian' then call me a Satanist.

janda426 · November 2014

Chunkymonkeylvr said:
One could even make the argument that a good Christian would never claim to be one because of the struggle of sin and being humble. I try to be a good Christian, but man I'm thankful for Jesus because I screw up a lot.

Ohhh yeah. I don't think Id ever be able to call myself a good Christian.

I also have no idea how I could carry to term if I ever received that fatal diagnosis. I guess that contributes to my being a bad Christian.

lawsonellis · November 2014

Chunkymonkeylvr said:

@Peledreamsofrain Seriously. If making my dying baby suffer more makes me 'more Christian' then call me a Satanist. ***jacked up quoting***** I'm sure you didn't mean this the way it has been presented to me, but my SIL is who carrying her baby for as long as he will fight for in utero and out is on no way carrying this child so it suffers more. He will die with in hours of birth, she is only doing it because it is what is right in her heart. This really stung and opens up for a very potential ugly debate on termination and what a baby feels.

I Love titted that quote, because I what I got out of it was that in a situation where something could be suffering (we don't really know) only to have a certainty that they will no survive their suffering, it's humane to try and lessen the suffering as much as possible. And if being a "good Christian" flies in the face of that, then don't associate me with "Good Christianity".

You're totally right @Chunkymonkeylvr that we don't really know exactly what the baby is experiencing or if he/she is in distress whilst incubating. But if I knew that my child would die within hours of birth, I would be afraid that the hours of birth that they DID experience would be none too pleasant, and if I can get any type of reassurance that ending the process before that has to happen will be less painful for the child, then I'd probably do it. (I don't know that for sure, and I have the utmost respect for ANYONE in that situation, and ANY route they choose to take.)

Bottom Line: It's touchy. And for OP to comment the way she did, bring a morality measuring stick in to such a personal and tragic situation just goes to show that she's someone whose opinion and words do merit any kind of thought or response. She's clearly a miserable AW who wants to make herself look and feel better by exploiting the tragic situation her "friends" are facing.

ngolimento · November 2014

Chunkymonkeylvr said:
@Peledreamsofrain
Seriously. If making my dying baby suffer more makes me 'more Christian' then call me a Satanist.

***jacked up quoting*****

I'm sure you didn't mean this the way it has been presented to me, but my SIL is who carrying her baby for as long as he will fight for in utero and out is on no way carrying this child so it suffers more.
He will die with in hours of birth, she is only doing it because it is what is right in her heart.

This really stung and opens up for a very potential ugly debate on termination and what a baby feels.

No I didn't mean it that way at all. Carrying or terminating a dying child is a intensely personal decision that is no one's place to judge. I was speaking out of what my personal decision would be. The idea of watching my baby slowly die is beyond my strength. My point is that no one should be judged for that. It's cruel to.

bdazzld · November 2014

All the PP's have said it better than I can, but here's my take on it.

While waiting for results from our genetic testing my husband and I had very serious discussions of faith, and strength and how much either of us could reasonably handle, and that includes discussing holding our child while they died or waiting for them to die in utero should we have received those terrifying results.

We are Christians.

If we had received a fatal diagnosis, we as a couple, who had communicated, comforted, supported, and wept together, may have made the choice to terminate.

This does not make us "bad" Christians, and we know we would have had to defend ourselves to friends and family who would judge us as such, which broke our hearts, but we would have still had to do what was right in our hearts.

Thankfully and blessedly, we received positive news and did not have to face that terrible decision.

We are told not to judge, and saying the things you have, means you have failed.

I'm sorry for that. I'm sorry for your friends. My heart breaks for them and should they change their minds, I hope you continue to support them and love them.

lawsonellis · November 2014

@bdazzld AMEN!

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