JFF - Common misconceptions

Stephij1 · October 2014

This stems from a surprisingly fun conversation I had with a pretty diverse group of friends the other night. I figured it would be even better with a larger group.

What are some common misconceptions that people make about part(s) of your life? Maybe you have a job that nobody really understands. Maybe you're a member of a group that people make assumptions about, For example: I'm a Mormon. People frequently assume that we practice polygamy (we don't. IF you practice polygamy, you're no longer considered in good standing with the church) or that we believe our underwear is magic (also no. It's a symbol of our faith similar to a Muslim skull cap or a nun's habit).

No need to be judgmental or nasty, I just like being educated (and sometimes entertained) by people who know more about a topic than I do.

CanukMam · October 2014

I'm very analytical, motivated, serious and organized at work but very touchy/feely/lovey at home. I love the people who are important in my life with all my heart. Some people have told me how surprised they are to see that side if me. I don't know if that's what you were asking...but I guess its very easy to imagine the other side of someones life but often it is no where near the reality.

BookitBoo · October 2014

Like:

I'm from the south and people automatically assume that everyone is unintelligent or uneducated?

The truth is that most people (farmers and good ol' boys included) know a great deal more than they let on but 1. They were raised to be humble 2. Like to give you enough rope to hang yourself with, especially if you're acting too big for your britches.

Stephij1 · October 2014

grumpycat88 said:
Well, I have resting bitch face ... so there's that. People assume I'm quiet/mean and I'm actually really talkative/nice. I just tend not to weigh in when I don't feel like my contribution is helpful, unless I have a hilarious comment. I was taught the art of sarcasm ... and timing as a child after shooting my mouth off too many times.

My sister totally has resting bitch face too. She's also the most outgoing, bubbly person I've ever met. My sympathies.

robsbabygirl08 · October 2014

Add me to the Resting Bitch Face club. If I'm not actively smiling, people ask why I'm mad or upset. It drives me crazy. @BookitBoo‌ I'm from the south too and people assume we are all a bunch of dumb redneck hicks. Yes, we like to blow stuff up, but almost everyone in my family has some degree of higher education. And as far as farmers/ranchers go, their intelligence goes far and above what most people assume. I actually had someone tell me I should change my accent to a northern one because my southern accent makes me sound stupid.

This one is bump related. People assume that because I'm pregnant I can no longer pick up anything that weighs more than 10 pounds. People yank stuff out of my hands at work all the time because I "shouldn't" be lifting that. Pisses me off.

LaBellaVida · October 2014

I also have a resting bitch face. I'm always asked if I'm mad.

I've been told several times that when people meet me they think I'm a major bitch. Then they get to know me, and I'm nothing like their first impression.

I mean.....I can be a total bitch though, ain't no doubt about it. But only when it's warranted.

llambrose · October 2014

I fall into the resting bitch face club as well. People always assume I am mad and when they get to know me they say that they thought I would be mean before they talked to me.

rayna912 · October 2014

HappyMonkey817 said:
People assume that because I "look like a hippie" that I must be into drugs. Nope.

The hubby and I have a similar problem to this. Because we like tattoos and piercings we are into drugs.
Or the fave, we listen to heavier music we must be satanic... >.<

mandikins27 · October 2014

grumpycat88 said:
Well, I have resting bitch face ... so there's that. People assume I'm quiet/mean and I'm actually really talkative/nice. I just tend not to weigh in when I don't feel like my contribution is helpful, unless I have a hilarious comment. I was taught the art of sarcasm ... and timing as a child after shooting my mouth off too many times.

stephchris0321 · October 2014

The high school that I went to was nicknamed the "chateau on the plateau" and we lived in a nice neighborhood so people thought my family had a lot of money. But I grew up poor living in an apartment with my mom and things got better only when my mom married my stepdad. My parents built our home as an investment but we didn't have a lot of money like some of our neighbors who worked for Microsoft.

sunnysunsun · October 2014

Stephij1 said:

This stems from a surprisingly fun conversation I had with a pretty diverse group of friends the other night. I figured it would be even better with a larger group.
What are some common misconceptions that people make about part(s) of your life? Maybe you have a job that nobody really understands. Maybe you're a member of a group that people make assumptions about, For example: I'm a Mormon. People frequently assume that we practice polygamy (we don't. IF you practice polygamy, you're no longer considered in good standing with the church) or that we believe our underwear is magic (also no. It's a symbol of our faith similar to a Muslim skull cap or a nun's habit).
No need to be judgmental or nasty, I just like being educated (and sometimes entertained) by people who know more about a topic than I do.

I'm LDS too! My DH and I just got back from the open house of a temple in our area!

januarymommy2015 · October 2014

I'm a "CTVI" Certified Teacher of the Visually Impaired. When people ask me where I work and I tell them I work at a school for the blind, they always respond with "Oh, so you know sign language!?!" [-(

Reiden · October 2014

I, too, have resting bitch face. If you ask me 'What's wrong?' more than five times in a given day, I have reason to hit you.

I'm polyamorous by nature; polyamorous people can be loyal, too. So many people think that monogamy = loyalty, which is soo not true. Not true at all!

I understand not everyone can live a polyamorous life comfortably, I will agree, it's not for everyone. But I don't feel like one should restrict themselves to just one person, if you feel you have more love to give to another partner, and your current partner is okay with that. I don't expect many people to understand my view on things, but it's nothing new.

YaMrWhite · October 2014

grumpycat88 said:
Well, I have resting bitch face ... so there's that. People assume I'm quiet/mean and I'm actually really talkative/nice. I just tend not to weigh in when I don't feel like my contribution is helpful, unless I have a hilarious comment. I was taught the art of sarcasm ... and timing as a child after shooting my mouth off too many times.

Ditto this. I've probably missed out on one too many friendships because of it but oh well. It's just the shape my face likes to morph into when I'm not talking.

MusicFanatic · October 2014

I get a lot of misconceptions based on my nationality. (i'm part Japanese and Polynesian)

Not that long ago when I met someone for the first time I got "wow, you don't sound Asian like you look!" .. uh. I said "I'm American, and was born here" and they said "but you look Asian!! Your voice just doesn't match your face" ~X(

I also had someone stop me on the streets a few years ago and ask where the best Chinese restaurant in town was for their dinner. A) who does this???!

Not all Asians are Chinese and people shouldn't assume so and C) say what?

That's really been done to me my entire life. So I'm pretty careful about making misconceptions about entire "groups" of people. Unfortunately, a lot of people aren't.

SSCmomma · October 2014

I am originally from New Jersey. People immediate assume you know a "Soprano" or hang out with the cast of Jersey shore.

CanukMam · October 2014

TRexsMum said:

I'm a Newfoundlander who hates seafood. All of it.

ahahaha, me too

luckylady18 · October 2014

HappyMonkey817 said:

I am originally from New Jersey. People immediate assume you know a "Soprano" or hang out with the cast of Jersey shore.
Oh you mean Joisey?? Blaccch nails on a chalkboard ... I'm also from NJ. People tell me all the time that I don't sound like I'm from Jersey and ask where my tan is.
Yes to all of this. When traveling, I've actually had people refuse to believe I'm from New Jersey! Movies and TV have made too many people think that NJ is all one terrible neighborhood, full of tacky, slutty idiots/mobsters. And the accent... ugh. It's only a tiny fraction of NJ folks who actually talk that way (including my mom! How did I manage to avoid it?) One of my hobbies is photography, and one day I'd like to publish a book of photos of all the beautiful, overlooked parts of NJ, so people see that's it's not all junk yards, oil refineries, and strip joints.

I make lots of NJ jokes because I live in NYC and I constantly sit in traffic in NJ, but in actuality I've seen some very very cute parts of NJ. My mom grew up near the shore. It's awesome where she's from. So pretty. It's called "the Garden State"! People just see Newark from the highway and all the parts that are right outside of NYC and assume the worst. But most people never get off the highway to see the rest of the state! It's super nice!

ShuShubee · October 2014

I also have resting bitch face. At my work conference last week, one of the sales guys kept asking me why I was in a bad mood. I wasn't in a bad mood at all. I was exhausted, yes, but that was because our schedule was insane (not to mention that I am pregnant).

The one that really gets me is people's reaction when I tell them I am a scientist. I get something along the lines of "you don't LOOK like a scientist." That one makes me angry. WTF? Just because I am a blonde female doesn't mean I can't be an intelligent human being too. People also assume I make gobs of money. I don't. I get a decent and fair salary for where I am in my career right now, but it is not some insane amount of money. We are middle class just like the majority of Americans.

Edit - spelling is hard.

emilyp2013 · October 2014

I have a few:
1. My mode of expression. I've been through a lot of trauma and have very specific ways to help myself cope that involves deep analysis of my thoughts and emotions. As a result my facial expressions don't often change even though I may be feeling deeply (I'm analyzing at the same time), so you HAVE TO go by what I say I feel and not by my face.
2. I say I don't care...and I mean it. With all the crap and joy I've seen, I have very clear sets of priorities and when I don't care about something I mean apathy. It's not code for anger or frustration or vindictiveness, it's literal devoid of concern.
3. I'm very conservative Christian in my own faith and moral standing, but I have no interest in forcing my ideals on anyone. I think homosexuality is a sin, but doesn't mean I want laws against it.

britb618 · October 2014

awe yay to the Jersey comments

I've lived in Florida And Rhode Island (which by the way has wayyyy more "guidos and guidettes" then Jersey! and I am constantly told, I can't hear your accent...Nope we don't all sound like that. Although I do say Cawfee and that isn't going anywhere anytime soon. Jersey is sooo unappreciated, seriously some of the best food in the country on every corner and really beautiful towns

I miss it! But my family is all still there so I am home pretty often.

@Musicfanatic- your comment totally reminded me of Modern family where Cam and Mitch bring Lily to the doctor and Cam starts going on to the "asian" doctor about how they are trying to raise Lily with her customs and asking her how she pronounces certain food correctly...and she looks at them and says "I was raised in Chicago, I've never had that" and looks at them like they are crazy...HYSTERICAL! My ex boyfriends sister has been all over the news lately, she's part of a story called Twinsters (google it if your interested, Conan did a skit on them the other day which was pretty funny)- two girls who were given up for adoption in Vietnam and found each other on Facebook even though they had NO IDEA they had a twin. One grew up in Jersey the other in Paris France! Pretty cool story, anyway, she used to get comments like this alll the time.

HStrawberry · October 2014

I work part time as a Lifeguard and people always assume I'm uneducated. I have an honors degree in ecology, physical geography and stats. I've done boat loads of research and gotten to study abroad several times. We chose to move to a tiny tourism based town for my husbands job so there aren't any other options for me here. So annoying

longcat07 · October 2014

SSCmomma said:

I am originally from New Jersey. People immediate assume you know a "Soprano" or hang out with the cast of Jersey shore.

i'm from NJ also. not only ^^^ this, but also, THE ENTIRE STATE IS NOT A PAVED-OVER INDUSTRIAL WASTELAND, FFS. (that would be gary, indiana.) nor is the state "just NYC's garbage dump".

and if one more person says, "ah, new joisy?" to me after i tell them where i grew up, i will deck him/her.

and i also have RBF...but there's probably some genuine bitch going on under that. only when provoked though!

edit: grammar

second edit: THIS is the part of NJ i'm from:

karla1301 · October 2014

Also have resting bitch face. I was in a good friend's wedding catholic wedding and I was sitting up with the rest of the bridesmaids at the altar and I didn't realize because I was concentrating on sitting up straight in these awfully uncomfortable chairs that I wasn't smiling. No smile = angry face. So people that look at the pictures joke that I was angry during the wedding which was very far from the truth. I was just trying to have good posture for the pictures and not look slumpy.

TXUltraRunner · October 2014

People always assume that my husband is the only one with the education. It irritates me to no end when people go "your husband is the one who went to Texas A&M University, right?" and I always have to respond "we both graduated from there." It's just annoying because where I work I don't use my degree and I already feel dumbed down. For people to assume i'm uneducated really gets to me because I worked HARD for my degree.

aerotigergirl · October 2014

Mobile bumping from home with a sick DS so I'll be short...

People assume that we are religious as a family because h snd DS both have biblical first names. Not true at all.

luckylady18 · October 2014

ShuShubee said:

I also have resting bitch face. At my work conference last week, one of the sales guys kept asking me why I was in a bad mood. I wasn't in a bad mood at all. I was exhausted, yes, but that was because our schedule was insane (not to mention that I am pregnant).

The one that really gets me is people's reaction when I tell them I am a scientist. I get something along the lines of "you don't LOOK like a scientist." That one makes me angry. WTF? Just because I am a blond female doesn't mean I can't be an intelligent human being too. People also assume I make gobs of money. I don't. I get a decent and fair salary for where I am in my career right now, but it is not some insane amount of money. We are middle class just like the majority of Americans.

Oh really? I thought all scientists had dark hair?

I've been told I don't look Jewish. Judaism is a religion - a belief. There are Jews all over the world who don't look alike.

:-q

sanbry · October 2014

Add me to the resting bitch face club. Plus add visible tattoos and a very short pixie hair cut and I get a lot of people not even bothering to approach me. I'm nice, I swear!
Another common misconception I've gotten is also due to my short hair, and it's that I must be a lesbian because I like wearing my hair short, or that my husband can't possibly like how short my hair is(he does). People can be so ridiculous in their assumptions.

Edvent · October 2014

When I say I'm a social worker or have my masters in social work, people automatically assume I work for "the state" or an involved in child protection. I have my clinical license and work as a counselor, my next stop will probably be private practice so I never intend to work for the state or with CPS. I like to promote my profession, but when people as what I do I usually just say "counselor" because saying I'm a social worker gives them no idea of what I actually do.

I also dislike when people assume that because I'm a Christian/go to church I'm conservative. I'm actually extremely liberal, but living in the Bible belt means most of my "church" friends would not agree with 99% of my views/beliefs. Makes it isolating at times.

SheHulk723 · October 2014

One misconception people have about me is that I'm always strong. Physically and emotionally that is. My friends gave me the nickname SheHulk because of it. But really, only my husband and maybe 2 friends know I've been struggling with severe depression, anxiety and PTSD since I was 5 years old. Emotionally, I'm often very very weak. I just fake it.

People also seem to think that since I come from a family with some money that I'm spoiled. However, my parent's taught me from the beginning to earn everything. I started saving for my first car when I was 7 because they told me not to expect them to buy me one. When I was 17 I opened my first business, which I've been running successfully for almost 5 years now. I pay my own bills and have made my own way in this world.

infinity092813 · October 2014

Catholics & the Catholic Church hate LGBTs. . .quite the opposite, we are TAUGHT to love everyone & NOT judge. Unfortunately, not everyone practices this so there is a common misconception. Also, pre-martial sex is a sin for everyone (straight, gay, etc) but the Church teaches mercy/forgiveness.

Designer bags, expensive jewelry, etc = rich. Not so much. A lot of it were gifts from other rich people.

Homeless = lazy. The vast majority I've seen are due to unfortunate circumstances, mental illness, or abuse.

Stephij1 · October 2014

Mazinator said:

Stephij1 said:

This stems from a surprisingly fun conversation I had with a pretty diverse group of friends the other night. I figured it would be even better with a larger group.
What are some common misconceptions that people make about part(s) of your life? Maybe you have a job that nobody really understands. Maybe you're a member of a group that people make assumptions about, For example: I'm a Mormon. People frequently assume that we practice polygamy (we don't. IF you practice polygamy, you're no longer considered in good standing with the church) or that we believe our underwear is magic (also no. It's a symbol of our faith similar to a Muslim skull cap or a nun's habit).
No need to be judgmental or nasty, I just like being educated (and sometimes entertained) by people who know more about a topic than I do.

I'm LDS too! My DH and I just got back from the open house of a temple in our area!

----quote fail/---

Fun! I feel like there aren't many of us on TB, so it's nice to know of someone else!

LadyXaverian · October 2014

Canadian living in the US, but…

- I like hockey but don't live and breathe it.

- I hate beer.

etc…

Um, what else.

I dress and behave pretty conservatively, so people assume I have conservative beliefs, but I'm really very politically and socially liberal in my beliefs.

I also have RBF, so people assume I'm very serious and bitchy until they get to know me and figure out I'm pretty much the nicest person they'll ever meet.

LadyXaverian · October 2014

Edvent said:

I also dislike when people assume that because I'm a Christian/go to church I'm conservative. I'm actually extremely liberal, but living in the Bible belt means most of my "church" friends would not agree with 99% of my views/beliefs. Makes it isolating at times.

This is my life.

LadyXaverian · October 2014

Locally, when people find out what school I teach at, the assume I spend more time dealing with bad behavior than actual teaching. They assume I must hate my job and that I'm waiting for the first opportunity to move to a "better" school in a "nicer" neighborhood.

Nothing could be further from the truth! I teach some of the smartest kids in the state (literally according to state testing) and I LOVE my school and my job, and for the foreseeable future, there's nowhere else I'd rather be. When I tell them this, I'm met with utter disbelief.

sunnysunsun · October 2014

Stephij1 said:

Stephij1 said:

This stems from a surprisingly fun conversation I had with a pretty diverse group of friends the other night. I figured it would be even better with a larger group.
What are some common misconceptions that people make about part(s) of your life? Maybe you have a job that nobody really understands. Maybe you're a member of a group that people make assumptions about, For example: I'm a Mormon. People frequently assume that we practice polygamy (we don't. IF you practice polygamy, you're no longer considered in good standing with the church) or that we believe our underwear is magic (also no. It's a symbol of our faith similar to a Muslim skull cap or a nun's habit).
No need to be judgmental or nasty, I just like being educated (and sometimes entertained) by people who know more about a topic than I do.

I'm LDS too! My DH and I just got back from the open house of a temple in our area!
----quote fail/--- Fun! I feel like there aren't many of us on TB, so it's nice to know of someone else!

I don't think so either. I'm a convert and my husband grew up in the church. I feel like we have the best of both worlds, because Troy is very open to all religion and not religion. it fits me growing up with no religion.

alexis.arnone · October 2014

TXUltraRunner said:

People always assume that my husband is the only one with the education. It irritates me to no end when people go "your husband is the one who went to Texas A&M University, right?" and I always have to respond "we both graduated from there." It's just annoying because where I work I don't use my degree and I already feel dumbed down. For people to assume i'm uneducated really gets to me because I worked HARD for my degree.

Same here. Except, I'm the one with the degree. I don't use it because hubby is in the military and we've had to move a few times so it's hard to get a decent job with my degree. He is a Nuke in the Navy and is VERY intelligent and everyone seems to assume that since he's so smart, we got married because I was young or dumb. When in fact, I had graduated college, lived with my cousin on our own and didn't marry Chris until we were together almost 5 years lol. Soooo many military stereotypes were broken with us!

We are just now having our first baby and we've been married for 4 years.

RibbetRibbet · October 2014

I'm an accountant and I get told all the time that I don't act like one. I guess accountants are boring and I'm not? I actually had one previous employer (when I was working at a vet's office in college) tell me that I was making a huge mistake because I wasn't accountant material and I smiled too much.

marvan5 · October 2014

Anyone I work with or have gone to school with think I am a goody goody. Perhaps because I am smart, honest, kind, sensitive, and empathetic? I actually have had my fair share of partying, (thank goodness those days are over) smoke(d) weed (it's legal in WA!) and have a crude sense of humor, especially stereotypical jokes. South Park and King of the Hill are my favorites, and I saw Daniel Tosh's standup live. I also am a nerd, but no one would guess what a huge fan of Star Trek I am, even if Harry Potter fanaticism is a little more obvious. I guess it has helped with my relationships with my bosses or teachers but the look on some of my friends' faces when I whip out a pipe and weed.... Priceless.

peggels24 · October 2014

I'm very shy when it comes to people that I don't know - people assume I am a bitch when they meet me.

MusicFanatic · October 2014

peggels24 said:

I'm very shy when it comes to people that I don't know - people assume I am a bitch when they meet me.

I am also this way. I'm super quiet when I first meet someone, it takes me time to open. I'm horrid at small talk with a stranger. Because of that, I've been called a snob or bitch. But I'm so not.. I'm really just shy until I know someone. It takes me an hour or so to kinda "open up". By that point, the person has moved on and labeled me.

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