So ashamed!

klafle3 · October 2014

It's been forever since I've been on TB, but I hope I can get some good advice here...

I just had my second baby 7 weeks ago. Back in May, a friend asked if she and her daughter could host a baby shower for me. I politely declined. So then, she offered to do a sip n see after the baby comes. I said sure, that will be nice. I just got the invite and it's a BABY SHOWER invite. I'm SOO embarrassed that this went out to all the people on the list I gave to her. I could just cry. To top it off, some of the people on the list gave us baby gifts long before the invites were sent out. Also, she just mailed the invites last week and the party is this Saturday. Idk what to do... call people and say not to bring a gift and just come see the baby? (Then it sounds like I'm expecting a gift.) Let it lie? My husband wants me to tell her something, but I feel like that'd make things worse.

Helenahhandbasket · October 2014

That's a tough one.

I guess the best thing to do would be to address it directly with her. Would you be OK with her cancelling it? Maybe you can just say that you appreciate her offer, but you just feel really uncomfortable with the idea of a baby shower, and you must have misunderstood her intentions.

Then just invite friends over as you are feeling up to it to meet baby.

jennypolkadots · October 2014

Wow, that stinks. I'm sorry!!

If there is no registry and it is after the baby has arrived, I seriously doubt anyone will think you are gift grabby. It is assumed you have everything you need, as the baby has been here for weeks. The invite says shower, but that actually works well because a lot of people would have no idea what a sprinkle is. Make sure you tell your friend you were surprised by the invitation because you don't want people to think of it as a shower and you don't expect gifts. When people start calling her asking about a registry or gifts she can tell them that you don't need anything and gifts aren't necessary. Most people are going to bring something though, that's just part of it.

I'm thinking your friend is one of those special snowflakes who believe in big showers for every baby, even if it is your 10th. These people do exist, and they make me blush.

Amstreagle · October 2014

Does the situation suck? Yes but I'm sure guests will see you are not the host on the invite. If people don't feel comfortable with a second shower they won't come. Just be super gracious and thankful to those who do.

mermaid1113 · October 2014

That's an awkward situation but I do think you should bring it up with your hostess. It seems like her intentions were good, but also very sneaky and disrespectful of your wishes- which ultimately negates the whole "good" part.
I wouldn't cancel it or call the guests, just go and make the best of it.

klafle3 · October 2014

Thanks, ladies. Canceling isn't an option, but we'll make the best of it.

chicagojackie · October 2014

I'm sorry this happened to you! You had good advice above. Hang in there.

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