You Know You're 9 Months Pregnant When...

battwoman3 · October 2014

When you no longer remember what an orgasm feels like.

Still having sex every once in a while... But it is never enjoyable. Too uncomfortable. Baby distracting. Feel like a whale. Do it for the hubby.

bethbaker14 · October 2014

When your co-workers QUACK at you when waddle down the hallway! (I work with mostly men)

Or when the ONE female that you work with declares you don't like her because you were "short" with her.... No she's never been pregnant, but can't you see I'm HUGE! It hurts sometimes to get out of the chair and SOMETIMES I just don't have the patience to be nice when you say something stupid!

MissN06 · October 2014

When someone else has to reach into the bottom of the washer because the baby gets in the way of you doing it. I told DH this was the reason he should have let spend the money on front loaders with pedestals so I could just reach in.

beatrixkiddo19 · October 2014

amadkins197 said:

When you start staring right back at the people staring at you at the mall/the grocery store/Target.

I swear this lady stared at me from about the time I was halfway down the escalator until I got to the floor. I stared right back the whole time.
A lady is doing this to me right now while I'm waiting to get my eyebrows waxed at the salon. I glared right back at her and rolled my eyes. Seriously, why all the staring like no one has ever seen a pregnant woman before. Edited: mobile bumping is hard

YES! Why am *I* the most interesting thing at Walmart??? I can point to several other individuals who are rocking unique ensembles to stare at....

Caraluvs · October 2014

You are up all night because the baby is having a party and your bladder is the piñata.

mander82 · October 2014

When you don't even attempt to use covers in bed anymore. All the tossing and turning you do just isn't worth it

aa98 · October 2014

when every time you get out of bed DH immediately jerks awake and asks if you are ok (read: in labor) instead of just snoring through your multiple middle of the night bathroom trips as he had in the past.

MuchlyGen · October 2014

When you get up to go pee, and then go back to bed. And then realize that you actually still have to pee. So you get up and go again. And then you go back to bed, but don't get in, but stand there next to the bed, half-asleep, waiting to see if you're actually done or if you really still have to pee. Which you do. But you don't realize it until you're back in bed again.

((This is all exacerbated by the fact that we have the crib sidecarred to our bed - meaning in order to get out of bed, I have to scoot down to the bottom of the bed and heave myself out past the crib - no blobbing it out of bed for me. sad face))

hjenni · October 2014

I have an update to something I posted earlier on here

. I said my H was too scared to do anything sexual with me because he's afarid of kickstarting labor. Well, yesterday I jokingly said "damnit Patrick! I shouldn't have to diddle myself just cause you're a scardy cat!" Well, later that night I got some! Lol! Who would've guessed that would work?

kfo22 · October 2014

When you consider switching to waterproof mascara, because... you just never know.

wildflower75 · October 2014

When you go into multiple stores and every sales person says to you "Woah! This isn't gonna happen right now, in here, is it?!"

JFH2010 · October 2014

When you play the fun game "gas pain, or contraction??" several times a day.

hidingangel82 · October 2014

When you start visiting Facebook just in the evening and are now Bumping all day long... because nobody, and i mean NOBODY else gets how you feel anymore, except your November Harpies!

mander82 · October 2014

When you have knee pain from either the extra weight you are carrying....or from the way you are waddling. Add another pain to the list.....

hidingangel82 · October 2014

LivInCA said:
When you've been sitting for awhile, and you stand up, but take a minute or two before walking just to let the pain flow through pelvic area and whatever else hurts...I'm REALLY glad that my desk is against the wall at work, so I can play off the pain easier by facing the wall while I grimace!!

So this!

joshua+rebecca11 · October 2014

silverwings72 said:
You look down at the ground and don't recognize your own feet. Wtf? When did they get so fat?!

I can't even see my feet to know if they're fat or not.

(

AnnieRoo13 · October 2014

When wearing pants just hurts.

I told my coworkers this at work today and they said they were very thankful I was still wearing them.

Curlyfries851 · October 2014

AnnieRoo13 said:
When wearing pants just hurts.

I told my coworkers this at work today and they said they were very thankful I was still wearing them.

Omg I thought I was the only one! I have 2 particularly painful stretch marks underneath my belly and every time I wear pants it's like they dig into those 2 stretch marks and rub them raw ugh!

Curlyfries851 · October 2014

Double post...dang shitty internet lol

Carebella · October 2014

hidingangel82 said:

LivInCA said:
When you've been sitting for awhile, and you stand up, but take a minute or two before walking just to let the pain flow through pelvic area and whatever else hurts...I'm REALLY glad that my desk is against the wall at work, so I can play off the pain easier by facing the wall while I grimace!!
So this!

Me three!

lizgrace03 · October 2014

Snuffy007 said:

When going into the grocery store, you pass two women walking the other way and hear, in a very loud whisper, "Oh my god she's so pregnant!"
I walked by two ladies today at Panera and they were looking at me whispering and the only word I could decipher was "massive." :-<
Seriously!? I tried to just laugh it off, but you would think other women would know better!

Yeah I've gotten used to it because, let's be honest, I am huge. I've gained over 50 pounds. Fortunately most/all of it is concentrated in my belly. But yeah, I've just accepted the fact that yes, I'm huge and people are going to comment.

jj0313 · October 2014

Someone tells you yiur dress looks comfortable and you want to punch her in the face for making such a foolish suggestion.

meeshybee · October 2014

The waitress says "Booth or table?" You take one look at the booth and say "Table!" because there's no way you could fit between the booth and the seat.

JNU76 · October 2014

When I take off my bra, my boobs rest directly on my belly...

BridgetThoams · October 2014

When you rush to L&D because you think your water broke, but really you just peed yourself

hidingangel82 · October 2014

JNU76 said:
When I take off my bra, my boobs rest directly on my belly...

Yes! But you still need a bra cause they just hurt!

DoubleUp8 · October 2014

JFH2010 said:

When you play the fun game "gas pain, or contraction??" several times a day.

^^^This

dbgwife · October 2014

Wolkie said:
I have another

When the 12year old in you comes out and you actually stick out your tongue to the people staring...

Okay so I havnt actually stuck my tounge out but I've widen my eyes and have given the whole "what?!?!" stare back! @Wolkie‌

krissykris89 · October 2014

When the only comfortable sexual position is no longer comfortable.

(

Snuffy007 · October 2014

JNU76 said:
When I take off my bra, my boobs rest directly on my belly...

On a related note, when looking down your chin rests on your boobs. (Have I gotten that big of a double chin? Are my boobs just squishing up? What is happening?!)

mander82 · October 2014

When you try to push out a fart and pee comes out.

hiketheworld · October 2014

When you look back at your "bump" pictures from first and second trimester and think you look so skinny.

dbgwife · October 2014

Thank you lovely!! I had to go back to brunette before the little man got here! The blonde was just way too much to keep up with! @Wolkie

dbgwife · October 2014

@Wolkie I loooooove that your siggy has Harry Potter!!! Total Potter head over here!!!

staugustinewedding · October 2014

AnnieRoo13 said:
When you get heartburn from eating too much, not eating often enough, from laying down, while sitting up...fuck it you just have heartburn all the time.

This!!! How can I eat jerk chicken and get no heartburn and then eat a hot dog and have heartburn for hours?!?

silverwings72 · October 2014

The sound of your DH breathing through his mouth makes you want to scream. OMG! Take some Claritin.
Sheesh!

battwoman3 · October 2014

... I looked up at the clock this morning and thought "is 9:30 too early for icecream?..."

... Knowing that just rolling over in bed has turned into a 12 step process, so cleaning one bathroom will certainly take me over an hour today. And accepting that.

@runnershan‌ - Duuuude I feel ya!!

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