Feeling like I'm being punished

mara005 · September 2014

** Talking about God, I'm putting this warning as to not offend those who don't believe, so please don't respond if you want to say anything about God having nothing to do with it**

I feel like God is punishing me, that I am being put through all this cruelty because I'm a bad mother. I stay at home and do all I can for him, I love him more than anything but sometimes I snap at him or get frustrated with his attitude. When these things happen I feel like God is watching and thinking, this is why you don't have another child on Earth. Rationally I know this isn't true, but I don't know what to do about these thoughts. I'm hoping by writing them, I will feel a little better.

Reagan1010 · September 2014

I understand where you're coming from. I have felt the same way many times in the past. We are human, and we all lose our patience sometimes. when I start feeling this way, DH talks me down. I always try to remember that it's science and the God I believe in wouldn't be spiteful like that.

Easier said than done, but try to be gentle with yourself. You not getting pregnant has nothing to do with your parenting skills. And I'm sure you're an amazing mom.

barackollama · September 2014

I felt the same way last month. It's a horrible feeling. I don't have any magical coping mechanisms. I can just say that eventually that feeling faded.

Now I try to remember that God's timing will be perfect. It always is. That doesn't work on cd1 butI can usually remember it further in my cycle.

BookishMomma · September 2014

mara005 said:

I feel like God is punishing me, that I am being put through all this cruelty because I'm a bad mother.

@mara005 All I can say is that those Teen Mom girls wouldn't keep getting KU if this were true.

tigerlynx31413 · September 2014

BookishMomma said:

mara005 said:

I feel like God is punishing me, that I am being put through all this cruelty because I'm a bad mother.

@mara005 All I can say is that those Teen Mom girls wouldn't keep getting KU if this were true.

^^ What she said!

I'm sure you are a wonderful mother! I understand how you feel though, so big hugs!

BootsOrHearts · September 2014

Everyone loses patience with their kids from time to time, I do with my 10 month old even though I know he doesn't know better and isn't try to get on my nerves. And I'm sure a toddler sometimes IS trying to get on your nerves, ha!

purplehaze11 · September 2014

Hugs, @mara005‌ . I often question why God has given me back to back micarriages. As we prepare to try again, I'm trying to focus on the hopeful rainbow we will be blessed with, and blocking out the doubt. It rarely works unfortunately. For me, I keep wondering what my body has done that is causing the miscarriages, since I obviously seem to get pregnant easily- wtf is wrong with me?

morganlmw · October 2014

I totally relate...prayers for you

emsmama15 · October 2014

Exactly what @BookishMomma‌ said. Hugs to you and hang in there. Losing your patience is part of being a mom. You are your harshest critic!

ellebelle2384 · October 2014

Just wanted to give you lots of hugs. My faith has never been challenged like this year. It's totally understandable that you feel that way but I can tell you it's not true. I hope you feel better soon.

mara005 · October 2014

Thanks ladies, I know in my head in a good mom but loss(es) really screw with all your thoughts and emotions.

ambmama · October 2014

I really hope you take all of these posts to heart. You ARE NOT a bad mother! I snap at DS and I feel super guilty when I do. I've also lost 2 babies and I know it's because of my body/other issues. It has nothing to do with the amazing job you are doing as a mom - sheesh we all have our moments! Hugs, God does not punish like that!

sailorgal · October 2014

Aww I'm sorry you feel that way. Big hugs, life as a mom can be tough! Everything that was said above is so true. All biology.

Mommytoacupcake · October 2014

Sorry you're feeling so down! I can relate. Sometimes it feels like there has to be a reason, right? Like why else would it be so hard? I try to hold onto the belief that maybe there's a GOOD reason did this...like god knows I need a bigger age gap than we hoped or planned for, like the perfect sibling for our DD is the next one to conceive, etc. The toughest times try us most and test our faith and it's so hard

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