Intro Day - sorry for the novel!

lib1974 · October 2014

Hi! Been lurking and minimally commenting for a couple months. I hang out mostly on the over 35 and IF boards however thought I would do an official intro here. Due date 3/28 FTM at 40(2 prior losses and 7 failed IUI). Did IVF with donor sperm and have one little lady I can't wait to meet(yes I posted in the right thread first)! I am single and was ready to start a family so I decided to do this on my own. I am 100% mobile so no siggy, I work a ton so I catch up late at night or the middle of the night when I can't sleep but I promise I won't post anything dumb (or intentionally). I have been observing some of the weird stuff people post, I have questions about why they do this but I know I will never get answers to them. Questions like; why do they think you are u/s techs that can read ultrasounds or why do they ask you questions they should be asking their doctor? It's a wonder why they don't fall down more. Also the Sex/Gender discussion was very informative, I appreciated the info. Lastly the sarcasm is hilarious. Anyway hello to you all!

DragonflyDreaming · October 2014

Welcome! I really respect Single parents by choice!

That was actually my plan the last 5 years (Since my late 20s). I had a time frame of around 35 (like, if I didn't meet anyone worthwhile by 34, I was going to pursue donor sperm and being a single parent). I was on a great forum and did a lot of research. I am so happy for you!!

Congrats!

Anne Mommy · October 2014

Welcome to the party! Looks like our kids should be born the same week. Nice to see someone else at the end of the month. <:-P

lib1974 · October 2014

Thanks! I have a ton of support which helps but there have been a couple times that I have felt like it was emotional suicide. Doing it alone sucks for many reasons however it will be worth it. Also worth it to 'not' be with the wrong person too.

DragonflyDreaming · October 2014

lib1974 said:
Thanks! I have a ton of support which helps but there have been a couple times that I have felt like it was emotional suicide. Doing it alone sucks for many reasons however it will be worth it. Also worth it to 'not' be with the wrong person too.

That was my main thing! I found I went through a stage where I was looking at guys as basically potential sperm donors before I'd even notice if they were right for me. Not a good way to start a relationship

. It was only my late 20s but I still felt that weird pressure. Once I decided on my 'single parent by choice' factor, dating and relationships no longer became timed or selfish. It made me free to find the perfect guy for me. I let my friends know my plans, and they were all super supportive. But even then, I knew it would be an extremely hard choice. I wanted that child, someday, and didn't want to end up with the wrong guy or in a bad situation to get it.

How long did you research and think about it, before deciding to take action? I originally started thinking about it at 26, lol! But got a lot of research in and planned to do it by 32.

Then that changed after I broke up with my ex-boyfriend I'd dated for 2 years, to 35 (I was 28 by that point and felt no where near ready).

lib1974 · October 2014

I jokingly started talking about it in my late twenties but when my ex of 4 years and I broke up when I was 35 it was my backup plan. I wanted a family and he didn't so there is was deep past my good child bearing years. I spent 2 years dating after the breakup and yes I found out that I was putting so much pressure on myself to find THE one, that nothing worked out. I have been trying for 3 yrs now and finally have my (what I call) nothing short of my miracle baby on the way. Sounds like we have similar personalities @drandonflydreaming!

Joon+ · October 2014

Welcome! Your avatar is super tiny b/c I am on mobile, but from what I can tell, you have the cutest dog I've ever seen.

Aeml1985 · October 2014

Welcome and congrats! I used to read a really good blog by a single mother by choice in NY, but I think she stopped posting as frequently so I stopped following. Post often, I love to hear about how others have chosen to build their families!

lib1974 · October 2014

His name is Mr. Furley and he IS one of the cutest dogs, funny too. I actually have two, the other one is a golden retriever and she is my doggie soulmate.