I changed my mind

blue_elle · October 2014

@bethugknee nobody from the FB group responded when I asked if it was possible to get in. Others were interested in a group, so I'm running with it. It's certainly not anything against anyone or meant to cause issues.

bethughknee · October 2014

@blue_elle I don't run it (obvs) but I think just not many frequent these parts. Because the FB group is SO. FULL. OF. ACTION. So I think it's possible no one saw it?

amt0312 · October 2014

tarajeannette said:

We could always make a new one, too. There were very strict, seemingly arbitrary rules for entry when they created it that seemed more than a little HS cliquey to me. And I liked coming here, frankly. But now that there are only a handful of us on here, I'd consider a FB group.

But I don't know about that @itsmeally. She changed her SN so many times, how do we know she's not a crazy!

My problem with the last chance they gave us to join was that you had to have 100 posts in the previous month. Well, that just happened to be the month of January and fuck all if I had time to have 100 posts in January. So ridiculous. I had well over 100 posts for November and December, but apparently we were expected to be zealous bumpies immediately prior and after giving birth.

Anyways, will I be allowed in? I know I don't bump much anymore, but moving 800 miles across country will do that to a person.

Roses87 · October 2014

tarajeannette said:

@marbeedoodledoo‌ bethughknee said 1st trimester. It certainly was not 2-3 months ago. My memory is shit, but I'm pretty sure it was when we all were still pregnant.

The cut off was when our babes were like a month or so old. I believe? It was a while ago.

xanadu94 · October 2014

@marbeedoodledoo it was in March. My baby was 1 1/2 months old, although some of the earlier babies on the board were much older.

PreDempsey · October 2014

It was closed seven months ago. I remember peanut joined at the end and that's what it lists on FB.

jldubb0626 · October 2014

Hi! jldubb0626 here. Admin to the "clique" FB group you are all talking about. I really don't care that you all want to make another FB group. Srsly. Admin-ing (is that even a word??) one is hard enough. ;-)

But it rubs me the wrong way that you all feel that we made this SO exclusive. We started this FB group in August 2013. EVERYONE had a chance to join until March 2014. 6 months to join this group. And I can only assume you think we were "exclusive" because we required 100 posts in 2 months (Um, hello? That's only 2 posts a day), that at least a few memebers knew you (CRAY TALK UP IN HERE!) and that when you actually got over to the FB group, you participated?? Hmm. Doesn't sound too different than what you're trying to do here. Andplusalso - when we closed the group, the ONLY requirement that changed was that more people in the FB group had to know you because a lot of members that were already in the FB group quit frequenting the board. So sorry that ladies in the FB group wanted to *gasp* KNOW YOU before letting you on the board.

Roses87 · October 2014

I don't think it really matters when the other group closed. Those that didn't join before, just want another way to connect. If there are fellow bumpies that are already member of the other facebook group want to join the new one. By all means, The more the merrier. I miss a lot of the old bumpies that don't post over here as much anymore and would be happy if they joined : ). We weren't trying to start any problems.

ChuggingWater · October 2014

This escalated quickly.

I'm not sure whether I'm to choose sides because both are making valid points, but Team Bump call fb'ers cliquey and team Fb is being extra dramatic.

jldubb0626 · October 2014

Roses87 said:

I don't think it really matters when the other group closed. Those that didn't join before, just want another way to connect. If there are fellow bumpies that are already member of the other facebook group want to join the new one. By all means, The more the merrier. I miss a lot of the old bumpies that don't post over here as much anymore and would be happy if they joined : ). We weren't trying to start any problems.

I don't think anyone was trying to start problems by making another FB group. In fact, I encourage it because the connections you make in a FB group are so much better. But it pisses me off to know that people think it was "cliquey" or "exclusive" because we had requirements in place for you to join. Wanting to protect ourselves and our identities doesn't make us a clique.

BABYROSEJEANS17 · October 2014

WOW, I miss all this in a few hours.

blue_elle · October 2014

Roses87 said:
I don't think it really matters when the other group closed. Those that didn't join before, just want another way to connect. If there are fellow bumpies that are already member of the other facebook group want to join the new one. By all means, The more the merrier. I miss a lot of the old bumpies that don't post over here as much anymore and would be happy if they joined : ). We weren't trying to start any problems.

All of this. The only thing that makes me feel like the old group is exclusive is that it got totally closed to further members. You guys don't want to open again, and that's ok. But we are ready for another avenue to talk, so here we are.

On the plus side, we got the old regulars back on, lol

Pinknights · October 2014

jldubb0626 said:
Hi! jldubb0626 here. Admin to the "clique" FB group you are all talking about. I really don't care that you all want to make another FB group. Srsly. Admin-ing (is that even a word??) one is hard enough. ;-)

But it rubs me the wrong way that you all feel that we made this SO exclusive. We started this FB group in August 2013. EVERYONE had up until March 2014 had a chance to join. 6 months to join this group. And I can only assume you think we were "exclusive" because we required 100 posts in 2 months (Um, hello? That's only 2 posts a day), that at least a few memebers knew you (CRAY TALK UP IN HERE!) and that when you actually got over to the FB group, you participated?? Hmm. Doesn't sound too different than what you're trying to do here. Andplusalso - when we closed the group, the ONLY requirement that changed was that more people in the FB group had to know you because a lot of members that were already in the FB group quit frequenting the board. So sorry that ladies in the FB group wanted to *gasp* KNOW YOU before letting you on the board.

I'm not trying to step on anyone's toes. But I flat out did feel excluded. I posted a lot on and off since Late June 2013. When the "last call" came around my baby was just born so I didn't have enough posts and that's why I didn't get in. I emailed you and that was the response. I wasn't super bffs with anyone but I'm pretty sure the fellow bumpies have seen my name. I would have liked to join but it seemed a lot to ask for during this time on maternity no longer sitting in front of a computer at last call. I believe I tried to join before too. Anyway, I'm glad a second group was made because I'm much more on Facebook and a lot of us would like to connect. I miss seeing the post from all of the bumpies too!

jldubb0626 · October 2014

Pinknights said:

Hi! jldubb0626 here. Admin to the "clique" FB group you are all talking about. I really don't care that you all want to make another FB group. Srsly. Admin-ing (is that even a word??) one is hard enough. ;-)

But it rubs me the wrong way that you all feel that we made this SO exclusive. We started this FB group in August 2013. EVERYONE had up until March 2014 had a chance to join. 6 months to join this group. And I can only assume you think we were "exclusive" because we required 100 posts in 2 months (Um, hello? That's only 2 posts a day), that at least a few memebers knew you (CRAY TALK UP IN HERE!) and that when you actually got over to the FB group, you participated?? Hmm. Doesn't sound too different than what you're trying to do here. Andplusalso - when we closed the group, the ONLY requirement that changed was that more people in the FB group had to know you because a lot of members that were already in the FB group quit frequenting the board. So sorry that ladies in the FB group wanted to *gasp* KNOW YOU before letting you on the board.

I'm not trying to step on anyone's toes. But I flat out did feel excluded. I posted a lot on and off since Late June 2013. When the "last call" came around my baby was just born so I didn't have enough posts and that's why I didn't get in. I emailed you and that was the response. I wasn't super bffs with anyone but I'm pretty sure the fellow bumpies have seen my name. I would have liked to join but it seemed a lot to ask for during this time on maternity no longer sitting in front of a computer at last call. I believe I tried to join before too. Anyway, I'm glad a second group was made because I'm much more on Facebook and a lot of us would like to connect. I miss seeing the post from all of the bumpies too!

Anyone who was short on posts got looked at as a whole. I noticed that you didn't have enough posts at the time (it was 40 posts from January 1st to March 1st), but I did ask the FB group to give you consideration because you were an active member from the get go. I felt it was easier to tell you you didn't meet the post counts than to tell you enough people didn't recognize you. I also looked back through all my messages and the that was the only time you had asked to join the FB group - at least via PM to me.

ETA - And I'm not trying to be rude or mean. It was hard for us admins to tell people they didn't meet the requirements. But these requirements weren't just some random numbers or dates out of our heads. When the group formed the active memebers on the board all pretty much agreed that they wanted stricter requirements for their own protection. Then when we decided to close the group, pretty much everyone in the FB group decided the requirements.

jldubb0626 · October 2014

*duplicate post*

jldubb0626 · October 2014

blue_elle said:

I don't think it really matters when the other group closed. Those that didn't join before, just want another way to connect. If there are fellow bumpies that are already member of the other facebook group want to join the new one. By all means, The more the merrier. I miss a lot of the old bumpies that don't post over here as much anymore and would be happy if they joined : ). We weren't trying to start any problems.
All of this. The only thing that makes me feel like the old group is exclusive is that it got totally closed to further members. You guys don't want to open again, and that's ok. But we are ready for another avenue to talk, so here we are. On the plus side, we got the old regulars back on, lol

If we would have left the current FB group open, do you know how awkward it would be for some of you to join? We have 140ish members in the FB group and only a small fraction of them still come here. It would be weird, to me at least, to join a group of people you no longer knew. And again, I feel we gave everyone enough time to meet the requirements and join.

blue_elle · October 2014

jldubb0626 said:

blue_elle said:

I don't think it really matters when the other group closed. Those that didn't join before, just want another way to connect. If there are fellow bumpies that are already member of the other facebook group want to join the new one. By all means, The more the merrier. I miss a lot of the old bumpies that don't post over here as much anymore and would be happy if they joined : ). We weren't trying to start any problems.
All of this. The only thing that makes me feel like the old group is exclusive is that it got totally closed to further members. You guys don't want to open again, and that's ok. But we are ready for another avenue to talk, so here we are. On the plus side, we got the old regulars back on, lol

If we would have left the current FB group open, do you know how awkward it would be for some of you to join? We have 140ish members in the FB group and only a small fraction of them still come here. It would be weird, to me at least, to join a group of people you no longer knew. And again, I feel we gave everyone enough time to meet the requirements and join.

And so we made a new group. And I'm failing to see then why that bothers anyone if your group doesn't want to allow anyone else anyway. I mean really, what is there to be upset about? We said you're exclusive? You are. You don't allow new members, that's exclusive. The word clique was used? So what! It was/is. You have your groups of people who interact specifically with one another.

And sorry, not buying the "it would be awkward". For who? You're all people many of us interacted with intensely for the last 1.5 years. As far as the newer people, well joining a FB group with tons of members is no more awkward then jumping in here. Glad we went ahead since I obviously wouldn't have been welcomed to your group anyhow despite having been here as long as any of you were and certainly none of the newer members would have had a shot.

And I wish we could just stop all this nonsense back and forth now because I quite like talking to everyone on TB - old group, new group, whatever. None of us have any intention of creating any friction or pitting people against each other.

ChuggingWater · October 2014

blue_elle said:

jldubb0626 said:

blue_elle said:

I don't think it really matters when the other group closed. Those that didn't join before, just want another way to connect. If there are fellow bumpies that are already member of the other facebook group want to join the new one. By all means, The more the merrier. I miss a lot of the old bumpies that don't post over here as much anymore and would be happy if they joined : ). We weren't trying to start any problems.
All of this. The only thing that makes me feel like the old group is exclusive is that it got totally closed to further members. You guys don't want to open again, and that's ok. But we are ready for another avenue to talk, so here we are. On the plus side, we got the old regulars back on, lol

If we would have left the current FB group open, do you know how awkward it would be for some of you to join? We have 140ish members in the FB group and only a small fraction of them still come here. It would be weird, to me at least, to join a group of people you no longer knew. And again, I feel we gave everyone enough time to meet the requirements and join.

And so we made a new group. And I'm failing to see then why that bothers anyone if your group doesn't want to allow anyone else anyway. I mean really, what is there to be upset about? We said you're exclusive? You are. You don't allow new members, that's exclusive. The word clique was used? So what! It was/is. You have your groups of people who interact specifically with one another.

And sorry, not buying the "it would be awkward". For who? You're all people many of us interacted with intensely for the last 1.5 years. As far as the newer people, well joining a FB group with tons of members is no more awkward then jumping in here. Glad we went ahead since I obviously wouldn't have been welcomed to your group anyhow despite having been here as long as any of you were and certainly none of the newer members would have had a shot.

And I wish we could just stop all this nonsense back and forth now because I quite like talking to everyone on TB - old group, new group, whatever. None of us have any intention of creating any friction or pitting people against each other.

Well said. I honestly do not see why this is such a hot topic discussion.

It is no secret that I was vehemently opposed to a FB group for months. I didn't join until Hoyt was two months or so.

Dishylo · October 2014

Doooont call me an oldie

. TB is just not as friendly as FB, PC or mobile.

Roses87 · October 2014

Well said @tarajeannette love the gif

bethughknee · October 2014

Would I be considered an oldie but a goodie? Infrequent lurker? Former GIF whoar. LMK.

I do agree, that escalated quickly. I feel like there's room here for a well placed Frozen GIF.

I can't take credit for thinking that timing was approps. That was all @sugarland726 inspired.