UO

mockingjay1 · October 2014

Dimples0101 said:

Emnob28 said:

I want this baby to come sooner rather than later. I'd be perfectly fine delivering at 36 weeks. There. I said it.

I'm with you @Emnob28. Although I think I have a skewed opinion on this because DD was born early (35 +4) and was completely healthy. No NICU, just small. I (obviously) do not want him to come if he needs more time or if there would be complications, but I'm over being pregnant. The only thing I'll miss is feeling his kicks.

It's crazy how different hospitals are. At the hospital I work at any baby born under 36 weeks is an automatic NICU admission. We looked at the patients we had delivered over the last 3-4 years and realized 70% of 35 week babies were readmitted to the hospital for one reason or another (low temp, poor feeding, jaundice, etc). Most 35 weekers we admit take 1-2 weeks to figure out how to eat. I'm glad your daughter was mature for her age.

soulcupcake · October 2014

UO:

"The doctor delivered my baby." or some other iteration.

Um, no, your body, uterus, birthed your baby. The uterus does 90% of the work involved during the second stage (active pushing accounts for about 10%), and the birth attendant (in most hospital settings) is there to simply catch him/her. Catching the baby does not equal "delivering." And, you're not being "delivered" anything. Pizza is delivered; babies are birthed.

lisaren · October 2014

Did someone here say friendsies????

Lilwatz · October 2014

Hell yes!

lisaren · October 2014

)

phdprocrastinator · October 2014

Econosaurus said:

I don't get the freezer meals obsession. It isn't 1950, my husband can prepare meals for a while just fine. I feel no obligation to "feed" him or have to worry about meals at all since I will basically be a walking breastfeeding zombie, that's more than enough for me thankyouverymuch.

I worry about freezer meals BECAUSE I will be a breastfeeding zombie. I could not eat enough with DD - so hungry all.the.time. Really, it's not much cheaper to BF than FF given how many extra calories you have to ingest to keep up the work!

Plus, we have DD this time around. DH usually gets home after her dinner time. Freezer meals are the reasonable solution, unless we want to order delivery for a couple months straight. I get super grumpy if I'm not fed... so it's best for me to plan ahead.

fyreandblood · October 2014

Another weight comment

I'm sorry everyone!

I lost four pounds two weeks ago and i'm back to the weight i was at the beginning of second tri. I know some women would be excited at just gaining 18 pounds and others would kill me, but i'm scared something's wrong, esp since there is always a 3 pound discrepancy between my scale and my doctor's, so i can't discuss it without looking crazy. It's not like i dont eat (i am a damn trashcan). It's just weird because before pregnancy, i would GLANCE at a brownie and put on two pounds. WTF LIFE WHY SO IRONIC. I'm terrified that there is no more room in there, and i'm also scared that she might develop issues because i havent gained the average amount.

The UO: i'm scared i lost weight! Whoever said you gain tons in the last trimester SAT ON A THRONE OF LIES. BAH SORRY EVERYONE.

Maelara · October 2014

@Econosaurus‌ I did freezer meals last time and they were a life saver! Usually by the end of the day I just wanted DH to take N. The baby is seriously just so all consuming that I forgot to eat unless Chris (MH) fed me. It was just easier on him, looking back on it. I get not wanting to do them though. They are a lot of work!

Maelara · October 2014

@fyreandblood my scale and the doctors are always usually 3 lbs off. If you think of it, when you weigh yourself at home, you probably have no clothes on, it's after you've peed/pooped and it's probably first thing in the morning before you eat anything. Also, I've lost 28lbs this pregnancy and Avery is doing wonderfully! That is just my circumstance and I was overweight to begin with. Make sure to ask your doc if you are freaked. That's what they are paid for

fyreandblood · October 2014

Maelara said:
@fyreandblood my scale and the doctors are always usually 3 lbs off. If you think of it, when you weigh yourself at home, you probably have no clothes on, it's after you've peed/pooped and it's probably first thing in the morning before you eat anything. Also, I've lost 28lbs this pregnancy and Avery is doing wonderfully! That is just my circumstance and I was overweight to begin with. Make sure to ask your doc if you are freaked. That's what they are paid for

>:D<

soulcupcake · October 2014

Wicked22 said:

I can say the doc delivered my baby because it was a c-section.

In that case it makes sense.

Maelara · October 2014

fyreandblood said:

@fyreandblood my scale and the doctors are always usually 3 lbs off. If you think of it, when you weigh yourself at home, you probably have no clothes on, it's after you've peed/pooped and it's probably first thing in the morning before you eat anything. Also, I've lost 28lbs this pregnancy and Avery is doing wonderfully! That is just my circumstance and I was overweight to begin with. Make sure to ask your doc if you are freaked. That's what they are paid for
>:D<

I hope you feel a little better!! So many things about pregnancy are so scary.

fyreandblood · October 2014

Maelara said:

fyreandblood said:

Maelara said:
@fyreandblood my scale and the doctors are always usually 3 lbs off. If you think of it, when you weigh yourself at home, you probably have no clothes on, it's after you've peed/pooped and it's probably first thing in the morning before you eat anything. Also, I've lost 28lbs this pregnancy and Avery is doing wonderfully! That is just my circumstance and I was overweight to begin with. Make sure to ask your doc if you are freaked. That's what they are paid for
>:D<

I hope you feel a little better!! So many things about pregnancy are so scary.

Your response made me feel SO much better! I feel awful for posting about weight, but i've been so freaked out and actively TRYING to gain and failing (something that's never happened to me in my LIFE. One cheeto = ten pounds). Ahh thank you

and you're right, SO many things about pregnancy are scary, even the tiniest aspects.

sweetbabyrahe · October 2014

@fyreandblood‌ I have overall also lost weight in the third tri (3 pounds) but I keep measuring on track. I gained a majority of my weight in the 2nd tri with DS and only a couple pounds in the 3rd.

lizzielu82 · October 2014

Agreed for letting that baby bake as long as possible (of course with the exception of medically necessary conditions where the baby would be safer outside than in)

With my blood pressure drama this week, I've been thinking a lot more about this and hoping that it does not come to the baby not baking long enough.

My mom texted me something funny that I'll share - she was out with my aunt (they are traveling together right now) and possibly drinking more wine than usual.

"You are like a baker with the most exquisite cake in the oven…"

Which to me, makes me think she's thinking of this…

And in my mind, I'm just trying to make it work and be realistic…

Regardless, no one's "cake" is going to be 100% perfect and full of magic and amazingness. I think we're all just trying to do the best we can. And it's hard when you have outside pressure and people judging you, a lot of times, for things that are out of your control.

*this is also not an endorsement of eating your "cake" at the end of this journey… @-)

SweetMelissa5 · October 2014

fyreandblood said:

Another weight comment I'm sorry everyone! I lost four pounds two weeks ago and i'm back to the weight i was at the beginning of second tri. I know some women would be excited at just gaining 18 pounds and others would kill me, but i'm scared something's wrong, esp since there is always a 3 pound discrepancy between my scale and my doctor's, so i can't discuss it without looking crazy. It's not like i dont eat (i am a damn trashcan). It's just weird because before pregnancy, i would GLANCE at a brownie and put on two pounds. WTF LIFE WHY SO IRONIC. I'm terrified that there is no more room in there, and i'm also scared that she might develop issues because i havent gained the average amount. The UO: i'm scared i lost weight! Whoever said you gain tons in the last trimester SAT ON A THRONE OF LIES. BAH SORRY EVERYONE.

I gained a total of 2 lbs with my youngest, and she was 8lbs 12oz at birth (40 weeks exactly). Also, as of this morning, I am still down 7 lbs in this pregnancy, and none of my doctors have even mentioned any concerns about my weight (and she's measuring on track and always has a great heart rate). Trust me, if there was any reason to be worried, your doctors would be mentioning it to you and possibly even ordering additional tests/ultrasounds to check on the baby (but definitely mention it to your doctor at your next appointment, and hopefully he/she can reassure you that everything is fine).

Dimples0101 · October 2014

*Snip*

I'm with you @Emnob28. Although I think I have a skewed opinion on this because DD was born early (35 +4) and was completely healthy. No NICU, just small. I (obviously) do not want him to come if he needs more time or if there would be complications, but I'm over being pregnant. The only thing I'll miss is feeling his kicks.

It's crazy how different hospitals are. At the hospital I work at any baby born under 36 weeks is an automatic NICU admission. We looked at the patients we had delivered over the last 3-4 years and realized 70% of 35 week babies were readmitted to the hospital for one reason or another (low temp, poor feeding, jaundice, etc). Most 35 weekers we admit take 1-2 weeks to figure out how to eat. I'm glad your daughter was mature for her age.

*end quote*

Agreed. We were super lucky. My doctors kept saying I was going to have a c-section and the baby would go straight to the NICU and we wouldn't be able to see him or her for 24 hrs. I delivered vaginally and the handed her to me to do skin to skin after they looked her over and I just said "What are you doing?? Take her! She needs to go to the NICU!" They said that she was just fine. DH and I were so shocked and thrilled. But like I said, my opinion is skewed because of my experience. I know my situation isn't the norm and although I'm tired of being pregnant, I don't want pre-e or an unexpected induction again.

ETA- quote box messed up

JFH2010 · October 2014

Ok, I'm new around these parts, but if night nannies are unpopular then I don't wanna be popular! We don't have the money for one this time, but if we did I'd sure as hell give up a night feeding or four to get a little sleep. Last time I had PPD and a baby with reflux and I took all the help I could get, including occasional overnight help (other than DH, who always took half the night feedings once bf-ing was established).

Freezer meals are awesome. Yes, my husband could cook for a few months until I feel like cooking again. Another way of saying this is, yes, I could eat burritos and sandwiches for a couple months. No thanks.

DS came at 36 and 3, seemed fine when he came out, then failed the car seat test and was in the NICU for ten days. It sucked and was so stressful. Before that experience I thought that anything close to 37 weeks would be fine. He is 100% fine and normal but I do NOT want to go through that again. I want this baby to cook as long as he can.

lizgrace03 · October 2014

Every time I see either of the following phrases, I feel guilty: "freezer meals" "meal planning."

fyreandblood · October 2014

My main UO: i hate social media and most of the internet. I hate the thought of being searchable, esp with my lovely ex. I always had to compete with his phone and social media and he used his accounts to cheat, etc so i'm just sick of this social media obsessed culture. I dont have any social media accounts anymore and i want to get rid of my iphone when baby comes and go back to a basic flip phone. I have an amazing DSLR, so i dont need a phone camera, and i hate the thought of me teaching my kid to depend on technology or idk, me checking my phone rather than paying attention to what's going on around me.

There will def be limited tech times later in her life (i have a list of old kid shows and movies for her to watch on the telly later), but she wont be using a tablet to watch shows or entertained by my phone. I get why other parents do it and all power to them/no judge, but it's just not a good choice for my family. I also hate plastic toys. I'm a weirdo.

Kristy774 · October 2014

lovebuggies1 said:
I think 18yrs old is too young to put your children out of your house. When I was a teen I was SOOO ready to leave! But college was my "leave" and I came back home every summer.

My POV has definitely changed. Seeing so many of my friends now struggling to learn and apply basic things YEARS later has had me wondering. I think staying a little longer to teach young adults, how to BE an adult is better than "oh let them figure it out."

I do know you can't keep them if they don't want to be there BUT giving them small perks and making them responsible for themselves while at home is a pretty decent deal.

It goes pretty much deeper than this but it's all my brain wants to dish out right now.

I very much agree with the 3rd paragraph. I can't bold I'm mobile. There has to be a balance though, as long as the kid/young adult is working towards a goal I'm good with them living at home for as long as they need. (With in reason)

fyreandblood · October 2014

KUinCBUS said:
@lovebuggies1‌ ...I moved out of my parents house on my 18th birthday but only because I didn't feel welcome there anymore. (Truthfully, I had not felt welcome for years, but it wasn't until 18 that I was old enough to leave.)

So, from experience, I tend to agree with you. I don't think age 18 is automatically equivalent to fully formed adult. I do think however that "adult" children at home should be learning skills necessary for real world survival and they should also be working / contributing while pursuing an education beyond high school.

I'm not a college snob BTW. Trade school, on the job training, apprenticeships, internships, online courses, anything really... it all counts.

Also, I think our high schools fail miserably when it comes to teaching kids about the real world. I would LOVE for the curriculum to include a course (or at least a seminar or a project or something) that covers real world finances like making a budget and understanding loan interest (students loans especially).

This. Esp since the decision making parts of our brains don't finish developing until we're in our twenties, hence why we're all idiots as college freshmen.

lil_shocker · October 2014

I know this is late in the game, but here it is. I wasn't terribly upset that I didn't get to experience the huge discomfort of 40 weeks with my son. I was ready to get my body back to myself. And born a day shy of 37 weeks my son had big issues with jaundice. He was stuck on a lighted bed for a week. So when you expect to be holding and cuddling your brand new baby, I got to watch mine strapped to a lighted table. That is not worth getting rid of the discomfort.

JFH2010 · October 2014

KUinCBUS said:

Also, I think our high schools fail miserably when it comes to teaching kids about the real world. I would LOVE for the curriculum to include a course (or at least a seminar or a project or something) that covers real world finances like making a budget and understanding loan interest (students loans especially).

Totally agree with this. I think it's crazy how few "real world" skills are taught in grade school. I guess the assumption is that parents are teaching those things at home. But the end result is that kids of parents who have less time, resources, or education to spend end up with no knowledge of things like personal finances - and then we tell them they have to go into debt to further their education. But by the way, we're not going to teach you how interest rates work or how to effectively budget and save. Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. As usual, the system disadvantages those who are already at a disadvantage.

MalachiteDrake · October 2014

On the topic of real-life skills and the failure of high school, I have a very close friend/adoptive sister (she threw my baby shower) that didn't go to college right after high school because she couldn't afford to pay for it outright.

She'd never been told about student loans.

She spent four years working for the Blockbuster near her house instead of getting the education she desperately wanted before I found out that that was why she hadn't gone to college. It came up in conversation one day and I mentioned the FAFSA and student loans, and her response was "What's that?" She was honestly totally floored by the information.

None of her family went to college or wanted to, so it was never discussed at home, and the high school she graduated from was in lower-income area of the city....where apparently no one was expected to go to college so they never even talked about the options available with the seniors before graduations. X( That should be criminal. Those kids deserve the same information and chances as everyone else and not to have assumptions made about their abilities, ambition, and worth.

I gave her the FAFSA website information and her butt was in college the next semester.

All schools should be required to provide that information and a "Life Skills" series of courses that covers everything from how to do a load to laundry to financial planning. Some parents simply don't have the skills themselves to teach their children well in these areas, some just aren't involved enough, and either way with our public education system we should be able to ensure that all kids have access to the information and basic skills they need to make a good start in life as an adult.

ETA: ....so, yeah. /rant $:\$ ">

minibean16 · October 2014

@KUinCBUS‌ I'm shocked it isn't required! Every student in our province has to do a course on this in grade 10, and do a two year 'grad transition' plan (preparing for real life) in grades 11 and 12. Big shame that it isn't a universal requirement.

minibean16 · October 2014

@KUinCBUS‌ you name the date and place (halfway point?) and I'm in! I don't know if every province requires this level of life skills though.

And yes, metric system please. Can that be part of someone's campaign in 2016? It just makes sense!

minibean16 · October 2014

KUinCBUS said:
@ClrkKntismyAE‌ ...Because the class got you out of gym, I fully endorse it!

This! I would have taken "Reasons you suck, 101" to get out if gym in high school.

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