My h and I are considering me staying home once number two arrives. Currently, our finances are mostly separate. We are each responsible for certain bills ans whatever is left is our own. We do have a joint account that our rental income went into. The house is being sold, so there won't be anymore funds being deposited into it. My husband and I can't decide how to handle our finances, if I am to stay home. I suggested that we would have his paycheck deposited into the joint account, all bills would be paid from the joint account, and each of us would get a monthly stipend deposited into our personal accounts. He hates this idea. He wants to give me essentially an allowance and everything else to come from his account. I hate this idea. He is horrible at tracking money and budgeting. As it is, I am responsible for making sure all bills get paid. I think him having limited access to all the funds, as would I, would really help us stay on our soon to be acquired budget. What do you all do?
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Re: Transitioning to sahm: finances
As long as his account is really a joint account, I think his solution sounds fine. My parents do what your H is suggesting. My mom works outside the home, but she has her money, and then they have joint money that all of the bills are paid out of, so she has her own money, but she can also see what my dad is spending. It works well for them.
ETA: In the end, they both view all of the money as "couple money." It isn't like my mom makes my dad pay her back or anything. I only know they do this because I was asking when H and I were setting up our finances.
I budget and pay bills from our joint.
are you going to have access to his account?
To the original poster - because you are doubtful and asking about it here, I'd say that's enough of a red flag that you are uncomfortable and that you should consider talking about it some more with your husband. Good luck!
eclaire 9.10.06 diggy 6.2.11
Like PPs said, any variety of systems can work, but you should both be comfortable with it.
His account is technically a joint account. I stayed home for a bit when we initially had our dd, and at this time, it was most definitely not a joint account. He gave me a cash allowance. He doesn't keep money from me, but he can be extremely lazy about taking care of paperwork. It wasn't until after I started working that he finally got me added. Also, he doesn't want me to hold him accountable for his spending. He doesn't keep track of his spending very well, nor is he financially goal orientated. This is the total opposite of me. I won't accept another allowance. I made this very very clear to him. We are trying to figure out an alternative solution. I thought my idea was honestly the best solution for the both of us, because he could spend his allotment how he saw fit, which is important to him, I could keep track of our monthly bills and savings better, and I would feel like I would still have some financial freedom too.
*Disclaimer: He rarely spends money himself and he's not an asshole about it. I just have a harder time adhering to our budget than he does.
I know that's not what you asked really, but I like your idea and think it would make it easier for you to pay bills and keep on eye on savings without him not getting an allotment for spending.
DS 3.12.08
DD 7.11.09
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