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March 2015 Moms
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I woke up hoping it was all just a bad dream...

marleeb123marleeb123 member
in March 2015 Moms
Today is no better. I keep trying to not cry but I just can't stop. I woke up at 530 hoping this was all just a nightmare but it wasn't. The pain isn't going away. And the only thing I can do is sit here look down and my belly and tell my baby how sorry I am for all of this. Tears are pouring out of my face as I'm typing this, I just don't know what to do or how to make it stop hurting. I feel like such a disappointment to myself and my baby.
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Re: I woke up hoping it was all just a bad dream...

  • lisap0924lisap0924 member
    I'm so sorry. :(

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    Married the love of my life: 5-17-14

    BFP:6-27-14

    EDD:3-11-15

    Step Mom to Z: 4-11-06

    IT'S A BOY!!!!!!








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  • Stephy129Stephy129 member
    You are not at all a disappointment to yourself or the baby. It's going to take time for this to not be painful so don't be so hard on yourself! I'm so sorry you are going through this.
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  • melleasndrsmelleasndrs member
    You are NOT a disappointment! Get that out of your head. The wound is fresh so it is bound to hurt. You have to give this time to work itself out. I know it's easier said than done. You're growing a baby with or without him and that baby should be your focus. ((Hugs))
    BFP - 6/28.....Unofficial(waiting on u/s) EDD - 3/9

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    July Siggy Challenge. Summer Fail. March 2015 Group
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  • shootznladrzshootznladrz member
    I'm so sorry I wish I could snuggle you and make it a better. (I promise I don't mean that that's creepily). This isn't your fault, relax and breathe. Take care of yourself and your baby right now.
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  • mommyofkaylinmommyofkaylin member
    You are not a disappointment to yourself or your baby. It hurts now, but as the pain numbs, you'll see things differently than you do now. The guy sounds like a huge douche. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. Try to remain calm and get support from people you're close to. You'll get through this and it will get better.
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    Rylee Amelia due March 5, 2015

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  • happybabe123happybabe123 member
    It will get better! In the meantime find a counselor to talk to and get an appt with your dr to address the depression and anxiety. There is no shame in help and right now you need support and help. Just remember IT WILL BE OK!
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  • mudbug84mudbug84 member
    It was shortly after I had, seemingly, the worst heartbreak of my life that I met the man of my dreams. That breakup was the best thing that ever happened to me. It rescued me from what was in reality, an incredibly toxic relationship. I couldn't see how bad it was until I was out of it. There's someone better and more worthy in store for you. I truly hope you have the support of family or friends right now. <3
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  • babybird0623babybird0623 member
    You are going to be ok! I promise you, there is nothing in this world that you can't do on your own. The week before we found out I was pregnant I chose to walk away from my relationship, we're military and I was tired of not being a priority for him. It was the single most hardest thing I think I've ever done in my entire life... But girl believe me when I say that if you two are meant for each other, and I strongly believe that if you wanted a baby together than God has plans for the three of you as a family, You will get to a good point with him. Give him space, it took two months for my SO after finding out about the baby to decide that nothing in this world is more important to him than me and our baby. But no matter what happens, you will be an amazing mother, with or without that guy. Believe in yourself, you've got this.
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  • kaylaalexxanderkaylaalexxander member
    So sorry you're going through this. Sending hugs your way.
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    TTC 05/12
    Tubal ectopic 11/12
    IVF #1 BFP EDD: 03/06/15
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  • MrsLaurenandDanMrsLaurenandDan member
    I'm sorry. You will get through this. Thinking of you!
    TTC #1 June 2010
    1/3/11 S/A - Count 45; Motility 32; Morph 4.3 - 2/10/11 - S/A Count 17mil; Motility 39; Morph 7.9
    1/5/11 Femara Cycle #1 = BFN  2/4/11 Femara Cycle #2 = BFP: 3/4/11 - Starting Progesterone suppositories 
    Beta#1 15DPO = 108; Beta#2 17DPO = 179; Beta#3 18DPO = 259; Beta 4# 20DPO =659!!
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    TTC#2 Pulled goalie 5/12, PPAF 3/13, BFP 6/27 Beta 15DPO=248! 
    Dx Severe Hydrocephalus and severe Dandy Walker Cyst.   Stillborn 10/19/13
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    TTC#3 - (No preventing, TTC+progesterone starting 12/13)
    4/7/14 CD3 BW - FSH 5.6; AMH 0.469 - 4/11/14 S/A Count 35, Motility 47, Morph 1.5
    4/16/14 - Cycle 6 - Natural IUI - Beta 12DPIUI = 3; Beta 13DPIUI=4.  15DPIUI=6. 17DPIU=4. Chemical Pregnancy  
    TTC #4
    5/5/14 Dx MTHFR homozygous A1298C, Benched 1 cycle HSG 5/14 both tubes open w/scarring on the left   
    5/28/14 Starting clomid 6/8/14 IUI #2 1 dominant follicle 31mm Beta 11DPIUI =4, 15DPIUI = 74, 17DPIUI = 165 
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  • ruemorganruemorgan member
    edited August 2014
    Thinking of you hun. As a PP said, "as the pain numbs, you'll see things differently."
    Just keep that healthy baby happy and forget the rest until you're ready.
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  • Lmsq1611Lmsq1611 member
    I know breakups are incredibly painful and I'm sure separating from the father of your baby must be even more terrifying and heartbreaking. Remember, you and your baby need to be your number one priority. A man who doesn't understand that and doesn't see his baby as a priority has a lot of growing to do. I know it's hard at this time but remember that everything happens for a reason and in time you will learn what the reason behind all of this is.

    I'm sorry you are going through all of this. Lean on your family and friends as much as possible.
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  • Krista528Krista528 member
    I am sorry that you are going through this. You are not a disappointment!
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  • beatlesgal4beatlesgal4 member
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  • molassamolassa member
    Praying you have support to get through this rough patch. I'm so sorry you are sad.
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  • cesquercesquer member
    You can do this. It hurts now but it will get better. Right now you have to turn into a fierce mama bear and protect your cub. Please talk to your doctor if the emotions are too much and you are worried about how it can affect the baby. It will be okay! Promise.
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