Any other young first time moms? I'm 20

justyhaunani · August 2014

Hey everyone,

I've known about my pregnancy for a couple weeks now, still kind of in shock, planned to wait a few more years but overall I'm excited. Juss wondering what other mothers are thinking and going through

Mom2bois85 · August 2014

There are a lot of young moms, first time moms and 5th time moms etc. there's a good mix of moms with different experiences on here. I was 20 with my first child, I know how stressful it can seem at first but it will all be worth it >:D<
It helps to have a good support system!
Good luck!

Connelljane · August 2014

I'm 21. Just like you I am very nervous but excited. I'm sure everything will be great! Good luck >:D<

redneckmomma25 · August 2014

I'm juss going to put this here.

https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12413759/any-young-moms/p1

It also pained me to put juss into my phone as an acceptable word.

Jade1207 · August 2014

No need to be rude "MOtownMama." Everyone here deserves the same respect, especially for someone trying to reach out for advice. You have no idea where people come from or their story, so leave the poor comments to yourself. So anyway, I am also a young mother at 22 years old. I very excited as well. Good luck with your pregnancy justyhaunani.

justyhaunani · August 2014

redneckmomma25 said:
I'm juss going to put this here.

https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12413759/any-young-moms/p1

It also pained me to put juss into my phone as an acceptable word.

My iPhone spell checks just to juss smh oh well I will still get corrected by someone lol.

emb518 · August 2014

I was 20 when I had my first. Definitely a scary situation but also wonderful. You have plenty of energy to keep up with your new little one

be888 · August 2014

Jade1207 said:
No need to be rude "MOtownMama." Everyone here deserves the same respect, especially for someone trying to reach out for advice. You have no idea where people come from or their story, so leave the poor comments to yourself. So anyway, I am also a young mother at 22 years old. I very excited as well. Good luck with your pregnancy justyhaunani.

Where people come from or their story should not keep them from using proper grammar.

MommaDesi · August 2014

Me! I'm 20, and this will be my first child. I'm all sorts of emotions, but overall just ecstatic. Oh, and I have no concern over your punctuational errors lol

Goodluck!

Jade1207 · August 2014

I didn't realize this was a grammar class.

Jade1207 · August 2014

I'm not the one using improper grammar. How about you read the post before you speak.

justyhaunani · August 2014

b&e888 said:

Jade1207 said:
No need to be rude "MOtownMama." Everyone here deserves the same respect, especially for someone trying to reach out for advice. You have no idea where people come from or their story, so leave the poor comments to yourself. So anyway, I am also a young mother at 22 years old. I very excited as well. Good luck with your pregnancy justyhaunani.
Where people come from or their story should not keep them from using proper grammar.

Jade1207 said:
I'm not the one using improper grammar. How about you read the post before you speak.

Don't entertain the judgmental women in here. They would rather correct everyone on the internet all day because I'm sure people don't like them in their lives.

Jade1207 · August 2014

I defended her because she is old enough to know what she is saying, and just because her text is not grammatically correct doesn't mean she doesn't know how to speak. I can assure you the girl just wanted advice, not a lesson. Get off the high horse people.

justyhaunani · August 2014

RHoPA1109 said:
...as you entertain the "judgmental women." You're special.

I'm special? That's they way you speak and that's the way you are going to let your child speak? I feel bad.

redneckmomma25 · August 2014

justyhaunani said:

b&e888 said:

Jade1207 said:
No need to be rude "MOtownMama." Everyone here deserves the same respect, especially for someone trying to reach out for advice. You have no idea where people come from or their story, so leave the poor comments to yourself. So anyway, I am also a young mother at 22 years old. I very excited as well. Good luck with your pregnancy justyhaunani.
Where people come from or their story should not keep them from using proper grammar.

Jade1207 said:
I'm not the one using improper grammar. How about you read the post before you speak.
Don't entertain the judgmental women in here. They would rather correct everyone on the internet all day because I'm sure people don't like them in their lives.

Sick burn.

justyhaunani · August 2014

RHoPA1109 said:

justyhaunani said:

RHoPA1109 said:
...as you entertain the "judgmental women." You're special.
I'm special? That's they way you speak and that's the way you are going to let your child speak? I feel bad.

Yes, my child will be reading the bump message boards.

I knew you were an internet thug! Lol sad.

justyhaunani · August 2014

RHoPA1109 said:
Ouch that hurt? I'm going to try to step out because you're boring...but it's so hard to ignore the trolls...

You should have never even commented. I'm not here for your entertainment or anyone else's. I'm here to talk about my child, not correct or look down on other mothers.

Jade1207 · August 2014

@RHoPA1109 I hope one day the people that come in contact with your child or anyone you care about for that matter, are nicer than you are being. It's sad. Leave the conversation already.

redneckmomma25 · August 2014

Jade1207 said:
@RHoPA1109 I hope one day the people that come in contact with your child or anyone you care about for that matter, are nicer than you are being. It's sad. Leave the conversation already.

I fail to see where she was being mean.

Jade1207 · August 2014

It's very sad that a bunch of women are trying to gang up on people over something so little. I would say it's a form of bullying. There is so much of that going on with children, and I'm sure you are all aware of that. I don't think adults should be participating in that as well. Like I said before, get off your high horse.

Jade1207 · August 2014

Hmm I think not. How about all you sad excuses for adults leave this particular topic and leave the girl alone.

justyhaunani · August 2014

snegde said:
@justyhaunani I notice you are starting lots of threads but you have given virtually no support to anyone else. In Bump communities it is important that you give support to others and not just expect people to support you.

I'm trying to and I'm reading and loving a lot of threads that most of these women aren't apart of. I feel as if I comment anything I'm going to be targeted regardless.

Misskris720 · August 2014

Here we go again....

Jade1207 · August 2014

@RHoPA1109‌ I'm sorry that you can't find anything else to say because you know I'm right. So you decide to start critizing again? Lol wow.

justyhaunani · August 2014

snegde said:

justyhaunani said:

snegde said:
@justyhaunani I notice you are starting lots of threads but you have given virtually no support to anyone else. In Bump communities it is important that you give support to others and not just expect people to support you.
I'm trying to and I'm reading and loving a lot of threads that most of these women aren't apart of. I feel as if I comment anything I'm going to be targeted regardless.

It's not that hard to tell someone who just found out they are pregnant "congrats" or "I am sorry for your loss" if they just found out they miscarried. you don't need to have great advice. You are making yourself a target. I mean this in the nicest way possible... stop starting threads for a few days, read other posts, find ways to be supportive. You won't be a target if you stop drawing attention to yourself.

Thanks for the advice, but I don't need to change myself or the way I conduct myself for a group of women on the internet. I'm trying to stay on topic and not argue about what I say or how I say it. I will speak when I would like to. It's hard to be supportive when people are targeting me. I wish everyone well.

Jade1207 · August 2014

@snegde‌ Give it a rest. Excuse me, was I acting in a childish way? I'm
pretty sure I'm commenting just like everyone else. If that is the case, then your calling yourself a child.

redneckmomma25 · August 2014

justyhaunani said:

snegde said:
@justyhaunani I notice you are starting lots of threads but you have given virtually no support to anyone else. In Bump communities it is important that you give support to others and not just expect people to support you.
I'm trying to and I'm reading and loving a lot of threads that most of these women aren't apart of. I feel as if I comment anything I'm going to be targeted regardless.

If that mj thread was not mud and you are seriously here and not a troll then continue to post and give support. That post really just came across as making up drama.

Grow a thicker skin. People will be brutally honest. It's the Internet. It's public. Anyone can respond how they want. Deal. Move on. I have had responses that I didn't like and I have become a better person/mother because of my bumpies. I have seen very few cases of people legitimately being mean or hurtful. Most of those who feel like they are being ganged up on are the ones who actually become mean.

Spell check and edit posts for clarity. It helps. That's not to say we don't all have typos and grammatical errors but most try and correct them as much as possible so that the original message can come across correctly.

When you find yourself getting worked up by a bunch of Internet strangers, hit the x, walk away. Come back tomorrow. I promise you, you are not being bullied. These women will give you whatever legitimate advice you need and whatever support you need. But like I said before, they will be honest as well. It goes both ways.

I've found with women, that the phrase "iron sharpens iron," is true.

Jade1207 · August 2014

@snegde yes I am an adult. Any other questions?

Jade1207 · August 2014

@RHoPA1109‌ If my opinion was worthless to you, you wouldn't have continued to comment this whole time. Actually I used the word 3 times. Yes, I do know the difference between your and you're, it was a mistake. You keep trying to pull something bad out of anything I say to you. Get a life.

redneckmomma25 · August 2014

SharkFarts said:
Whoa, shout out to @redneckmomma25‌ for using a proverb. Awesome.

Ha. Like that? I have my moments of clarity.

Jade1207 · August 2014

@MOtownMama‌ digging myself out if a hole?.. Yes I agree, a giant hole of y'all BS. What is "WKing for a troll?" I don't understand that. Please explain.

Jade1207 · August 2014

@MOtownMama Okay, I do understand what your saying. I'm not really trying to WK for anyone. I never really ever comment on anything, and I hardly read any of these forums. Tonight I decided to read a few and I just didn't realize people comment such things, it bothered me.

justyhaunani · August 2014

SharkFarts said:

justyhaunani said:

snegde said:

justyhaunani said:

snegde said:
@justyhaunani I notice you are starting lots of threads but you have given virtually no support to anyone else. In Bump communities it is important that you give support to others and not just expect people to support you.
I'm trying to and I'm reading and loving a lot of threads that most of these women aren't apart of. I feel as if I comment anything I'm going to be targeted regardless.

It's not that hard to tell someone who just found out they are pregnant "congrats" or "I am sorry for your loss" if they just found out they miscarried. you don't need to have great advice. You are making yourself a target. I mean this in the nicest way possible... stop starting threads for a few days, read other posts, find ways to be supportive. You won't be a target if you stop drawing attention to yourself.
Thanks for the advice, but I don't need to change myself or the way I conduct myself for a group of women on the internet. I'm trying to stay on topic and not argue about what I say or how I say it. I will speak when I would like to. It's hard to be supportive when people are targeting me. I wish everyone well.

You are not being targeted. No one is following you around to other posts and hounding you. You've been over active today using us as your personal google and now you're getting super defensive when people try to offer suggestions on how to better interact on this board. Snedge is right, I think you need to step away for the night. Come back tomorrow, lurk a bit, and utilize the search feature at the top to find topics similar to what you want to ask. And don't get defensive when someone doesn't answer you in just the way you wanted them to.

I do feel a couple of women have targeted me because they have gone on all of my posts.

MOtownMama said:
@Jade1207 You're going to feel real silly when you realize you've been WKing for a troll.‌

I don't understand how I am a "troll".

justyhaunani · August 2014

RHoPA1109 said:
They are not "your" posts. This is a public message board.

Ok.

[Deleted User] · August 2014

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justyhaunani · August 2014

GrailSeeker14 said:

justyhaunani said:

I do feel a couple of women have targeted me because they have gone on all of my posts.

Why does it surprise you that you see the same people posting on multiple threads? Did you not get the memo that this is a public forum, and those who are regulars, many of whom have been for a long time, post on many if not most threads. That's the nature of this place. If you'd lurked for even 10 seconds you'd know that.

ANDPLUSALSO, do you not see a pattern in how all of YOUR threads have turned out? You are the common factor to all of those threads, so.... maybe take a second to do the math and you might figure out that how you're approaching this board is not going over well, that you might be better off taking a step back for a while, maybe even sleeping on it and come back in a day or two when you're ready to lurk, get a feel for how TB forums and A'15 in particular works, and participate in a more genuine give support to get support kind of way. I highly recommend that instead of continually getting riled up over pretty benign responses you've been getting, as so far it seems that a) you don't have thick enough skin to take the no-BS, tolerate no trolls and special snowflakes, say it like it is interaction style around here, 2) you have misplaced your sense of humor, and/or c) TheBump forums might not be the best fit for you and what you're looking for

(FYI - TB forums are not support groups, not a "safe place," not to be used as a personal blog or personal google. This board is a public forum that takes the shape of a community with a culture that you need to familiarize yourself with before you charge in like a bull in a china shop).

Asking a few questions is not charging in. The women replying to my question with paragraphs about why I'm wrong for asking it are charging in like a bull in a china shop. I already got my question answered though so there is no need for me to continue this conversation with anyone. Thanks for your concern.

justyhaunani · August 2014

RHoPA1109 said:
We didn't charge in...we've been here for long enough to figure each other out, support each other, etc. You busted in with your entitlement and silly questions.

Never busted in with my entitlement, you just took it that way. Guess I should have made a thread about my constipation, probably would have got a better response.

justyhaunani · August 2014

MOtownMama said:
@jade1207 you may or may not be a troll but you are, in fact, displaying very troll - like behavior. Random new person starting multiple new threads, some with controversial topics, poor grammar, immediately arguing instead of backing down, and basically shit stirring. All these usually lead to trolls. You may or may not be a troll but you sure are acting like one!

Thread police. Why don't you back down. Your stirring the pot even more with your shitty attitude.

justyhaunani · August 2014

RHoPA1109 said:
Nope, you wouldn't have gotten a better response, you would've been told to post about constipation in the symptoms threads. You really don't get it here.

This a thread for April 2015 moms so I'm guessing the topics include pregnancy symptoms correct? Someone made one about spotting and cramping did you tell them to go to the symptom threads? Goodnight I'd rather get sleep than go back and forth with you. Hope you get a great nights rest because I sure will.

[Deleted User] · August 2014

The user and all related content has been deleted.

mariannw · August 2014

So back to the actual thread now that everyone got all of that off their chests(:
I'm a first time mom and I'm 21, im SO excited but definitely scared. My husband started crying when he found out. I haven't had hardly any symptoms except super sleepy and not hungry. But this should be a great time in all of our lives whether it's our first or tenth(:
How have you been feeling? How far along are you?

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