April 2015 Moms

Opinions please

This is my first pregnancy. I'm very excited and couldn't be more happier. I already know my family is going to be Debby downers about the whole thing. I'm 18 and going engaged a few months ago and my family was not very supportive about it because I'm obviously young. So telling them I'm pregnant is not something I'm looking forward too. I'm really considering not saying anything at all or at least the earliest maybe when I find out the sex. I'm not sure. I just want to enjoy this and not have negativity around me. Do any of you have others ideas? Maybe just getting it over with? Go with not saying anything? Wait until a certain time? What? Like I said, I just want to enjoy this!

Re: Opinions please

  • Please ignore the grammars errors!
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  • I'd say once you visit the doctor and there's a heartbeat, etc. I would rip the bandaid and just do it. Will they be upset? Probably. But at least they'll have time to figure it (mostly) all out by the time the baby arrives and (hopefully) be more excited about it all. The more stuff you can have figured out (living situation, financial aspects, daycare arrangements you anticipate, etc.), the better. Be prepared.
    I also think @doribeth851 has a good point. If you need them to support you financially/will be living there, etc. you need to ensure that they have enough time to adjust. 
    Good luck!
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  • cjd&kcjd&k member
    edited August 2014
    I don't live near any family. I'm in a completely different state and don't expect or really need any of their support financially. That was a very good response though! Thank you both, @Mireille LeBlanc & @doribeth851‌
  • Oh ok! Well that might make it easier than! And the distance means that if they aren't supportive, at least you don't need to hear them too often. I would still do it early enough, just so the negativity can be gone in time for the baby's arrival. Good luck!!
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  • Tell them. If you are excited and happy then let them know how you feel. If they don't share in your excited meant then that's tere problem. I am sure you are aware of all the negative thigs they can say because of your age so there is no point in listening. Like another poster said do not hide it cause it makes it seem like you are ashamed. Good luck

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  • cjd&kcjd&k member
    edited August 2014
    Very far from ashamed! I'm extremely excited and value all of your opinions. I know miscarriage is a risk. I have a little over 3* weeks until I'm into my second trimester. Thank you ladies! I'll have to post again whenever I decide to tell them.
  • cjd&kcjd&k member
    edited August 2014
    That was meant to be a 3 not a 2. Sorry, I'm on my phone. My EDD is April 2nd
  • I agree with many of the PP, but especially the idea that you need to a. Have your plan figured out when you share the news so that you sound prepared and equipped to handle the situation and b. be joyful and excited, just as you are. The longer you keep it a secret, the more it will look like you are trying to hide something and this could lead to more problems and disrespect than just sharing your news. But again, it's your news to tell. You know your family better than any of us and you need to be prepared and comfortable sharing with them.

    Married Since July 2012

    DS1 Born via C-Section - 6/21/2013

    BFP#2 7/28/2014, EDD 04/07/2015


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  • I agree with others to tell them when ready, but around end of 1st trimester is good. Most people think of that as standard so hopefully it wouldn't offend your famil for waiting. My sister was pregnant at a young age and my parent's biggest concern was how she was going to handle it financially but after the initial shock they were excited about the new baby. Since you say you don't need financial help, hopefully they will be excited about being grandparents. In the end you know your parents and family dynamic best.
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  • "Not a support group" my butt! I love the support you guys give! Thank you ladies.
  • I think if you let your family determine when you tell them it's like letting them have control of the situation. I say do it whenever you feel like it and then it's you being in control of your life and owning it! I think you will feel worse about yourself by letting them affect your decision so much so just do what you want!
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