We lost our little girl early yesterday morning at 17w5d.
DH is taking it much harder than I (or even he) expected he would. With our first loss, it was just the thought of a baby and I don't think he was that connected. With this one, he now knows what he is missing as we have two little girls. I have never seen him like this and I have no idea how to help him. He is withdrawn from our girls and it hurts to see him like this with them.
We also told our oldest DD (she is a couple of months shy of 3) and she took it surprisingly well. I'm not exactly sure how much she truly understands but I'm ok with her not grasping the concept of death. I'm hoping she will be fine, but are there things I should look out for just in case? Did anybody's LO act out more, need extra attention, etc?
And finally, I'm so lost. I waiver from being ok, almost a been there, done that so I know how to get through it mentality, to sobbing on the bathroom floor because I also know all that I will be missing, to just plain pissed off and it is just not fair that this keeps happening to me, to get your sh!t together because you still have two little girls that need you. I know it is all still so fresh and it just takes time, but how long did it take until you stopped feeling such extreme opposites?
My ChartMy Life
BFP 7.7.09 - CVS 9.10.09 (Girl) - 9.24.09 Severe Fatal Malformation - D&E 10.7.09 @ 17wks
BFP 6.1.10 - 6.10.10 Ectopic M/C @ 5wks
BFP 10.26.10 - 10.29.10 CP
BFP 1.30.11 - CVS 3.28.11 (Girl) - EDD 10.11.11 - Born 10.6.11
BFP 12.18.12 - 12.20.12 CP
BFP 3.18.13 - CVS 5.21.13 (Girl) - EDD 12.2.13 - Born 11.24.13
BFP 6.10.14 - CVS 7.2.14 (Girl) - EDD 1.12.15 - Born sleeping 8.6.14 @ 17w5d