Extended BF / Night Weaning Question

mshukh · August 2014

I am at a crossroads and need some help understanding my options and likely consequences from those who may have some experience with this. My LO is 14 months and 1 week old. We have been EBF from the start and never had supply issues (oversupply in the beginning, but that’s another story). Currently, he is nursing to sleep at night, once in the middle of the night (between 2-5 am depending on the night), and once on the weekends for the nap to sleep; I also pump during mid-day at work to keep supply for that nap feed on the weekends. He will go down to sleep with a babysitter or dad without nursing both daytime and nighttime currently so that does not appear to be an issue at this time.

Here is my dilemma: do I night-wean and move the 2-5 am feed to when he wakes up (around 6:40 am although I fear it may move up if he doesn’t eat in the middle of the night) or do I keep going with what we’ve been doing as that seems to be working out fairly well.

The reasons for night-weaning:

- On weekdays I get up between 4:15-5am depending on the day in order to work out / run with the dog. That is a non-negotiable for me and unfortunately nights do not work as I’m a morning person / hate working out at night / too tired / things come up and it’s hard to be consistent.

- Because of this, if the baby gets up say at 3:30am to feed, that’s often my wake up time for the day, as by the time he is done I only have 15-30 minutes to sleep before the alarm goes off.

- On weekends I never get the full night’s rest either since I still have to feed once in the middle of the night…and if we go out and get home late I also worry about whomever is watching him…what if he wakes up earlier than before we come home? What if I need to travel away? What if we go on a vacation together and he keeps wanting to nurse in the hotel room more than once because he knows we are there = no vacation for mommy.

- One of my biggest fears is having to night wean eventually. We have skipped the night feed the last 5 nights and he started sleeping through the night without waking very quickly, so I know it would be easy to continue this way now; how difficult is it to do when they are older? Will he put up much more of a fight?

- We hope to start TTC sometime within the next 3-6 months. I still don’t have my AF.

The reasons against night-weaning:

- Since I held off feeding the last 5 nights until morning, I noticed my mid-day supply has almost halved (per pumping output).

- Now I have to get home from the gym / run by 7 am or earlier so that I can feed him before we get him up for the day and feed breakfast. That doesn’t allow very much time for me so it’s a little stressful, but doable.

- I also have pretty full breasts now when I leave for my workouts as I used to nurse right before and now I nurse after the gym.

- I’m afraid that if I don’t nurse between the magical hours of 2-5, my milk supply will continue dropping and this may mark the end of our nursing relationship.

- We hope to start TTC sometime within the next 3-6 months. I expect discomfort nursing and a drop in supply; therefore, I’m afraid to add anything else to compromise my supply.

That’s a lot of questions for one post, so thanks to anyone who has read all the way through. All suggestions / experiences /advice are welcome.

Thanks!

P.S. Option #3 would be just to nurse for bed-time and for nap-time...but then again I'm worried about my supply to go down to just these two when he's still only 14 months. Will we make it till 2 y/o?

vvvvvfee · August 2014

yes, you can night wean. start here: https://drjaygordon.com/attachment/sleeppattern.html
most sources do not recommend night-weaning before 12 months since your LO may still need the nutrition. your LO is 14 months, so that is not a concern. night-weaning may hasten the return to fertility, but it sounds like in your case that might not be a bad thing. i would not worry too much about your supply dropping if you add in another feeding during the day to make up for the one you miss during the night.

i would say, nurse first thing when he wakes up, when you get home from work, and before bed. try the jay gordon method above to gently night-wean. let your LO nurse on demand on weekends. i don't think you need to keep pumping at work. i stopped pumping at work at 14 months. DS always nursed/nurses extra times when i am home with him on weekends. i have not had any problems with engorgement during the day or keeping up supply on weekends. we are still nursing and he just turned 2.

if you choose not to night wean now, in my opinion it is easier to set limits on it when they are older. i never officially night-weaned DS, he gradually grew out of it on his own. but it helps when they are old enough that you can explain to them, "boobies (or whatever you call them) need to rest now. you can nurse when the sun comes out," or whatever.

mshukh · August 2014

Thanks so much for all the encouragement and the shared experiences! Makes me feel a lot easier with this transition. I think that part of my hesitance was for selfish reasons as it's one of my favorite feeds and a part of me found it hard to stop it. I will continue to feed in am after the workout and will add in a dinner feed and gently wean off the pump in the afternoon. Interestingly, I think he has been wanting a feed after I come home from work for the past few days. Coincidence? I will trust that the supply doesn't dip and if it ever does, I could always add in a feeding session.

As a side note, when we went on a vacation when he was 9 months old, he did sleep in the hotel room. And took naps with almost no set-backs. So I am hopeful that he will sleep if we ever do end up going with him somewhere.

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