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2nd babies... How much help?

BloomingMommaBloomingMomma member
in Stay at Home Moms
Hello!

Toddler (2.5) will be in daycare 2 mornings a week this fall. Husbabd can take maternity leave, but then he's pretty busy there with longish hours. Baby #2 is due eariy October.

I have the luxury to hire someone 2 mornings a week to help me, maybe even 8:30 to 2pm... The thing is, she says she needs one more morning. I feel like new baby will be challenging, and we have no family here, but I worry that long-term I'll feel smothered by 3-days a week.

Any sahm here without family help, who hired someone to help weekly with 2-kids? How much help was enough? TIA!
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Re: 2nd babies... How much help?

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  • kcisthebombdotcomkcisthebombdotcom member
    eaglesfan700 said:
    I would probably wait a little bit to hire someone. That way you can see what you will really need/want.

    Agreed. You may have a dream baby and feel fine doing it solo or you could have a colicky infant and feel you need the help. I think assuming that dh is taking a week or two off you will be fine.
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  • eaglesfan700eaglesfan700 member
    If I was going to hire someone, I would skip the daycare and mother's helper and hire a sitter to watch both kids a couple mornings, when you are comfortable leaving the baby
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  • MesmrEweMesmrEwe member
    Honestly, I'd hire a DCP for PT on the two days the other one is in school... The idea being that you get a chance to take a nap and a shower all in the same day. The challenge is until LO arrives, you won't know what their personality is. DD was a super easy baby - DS was a colicy nightmare and it wasn't until he was about 15mo before I got 4 sustained hours of sleep a couple times a week...
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  • BloomingMommaBloomingMomma member
    Thank you all. The "unknown" is the hardest for me to wrap my head around. After reading these replies, I do think I started my search too early. You're right... What if I don't need person that much or need more or different timings, etc. I did want to hire before baby so toddler could get used to it, but you are correct... Unknown stuff.... Thank you
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  • mrsnorthernbellmrsnorthernbell member
    edited August 2014
    I thought it would be harder than it actually was.  DS slept so much as a newborn that I felt like I was able to rest during the day even with a 2.5 year old running around and it being summer.  
    I would clean during one of his naps, I would spend 1 on 1 time during one of them, I would rest for another and then prep dinner.  
    You probably won't even want/need the help especially if your toddler is in dc.  We have NO family close and NO help ever, not even a reliable babysitter and we have adjusted.  You can do it and you will enjoy the extra snuggles with the baby.  

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  • ariel06ariel06 member
    Honestly, I needed the help more in cooking and cleaning than with the kids. 
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  • trizzietrizzie member
    I didn't need any help with the second and I don't anticipate needing help with my 3rd. It was a pretty easy transition.
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  • alli2672alli2672 member
    edited August 2014
    ariel06 said:
    Honestly, I needed the help more in cooking and cleaning than with the kids. 

    I agree with this.  I would consider hiring help with cooking and cleaning rather than someone to watch the kids while you cook and clean. 


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  • KMommytobeKMommytobe member
    It's a lot to take care of 2 young children, housework, errands etc but it can absolutely be done. I didn't hire any help or anything and my oldest wasn't in school.

    We are currently pregnant with our third and DS1 is starting preschool 2 days a week in the fall. Baby #3 won't arrive until Feb but as I said our oldest will be in school and what I am doing is having him go a full day on Tuesdays, normal mornings on Thursdays, and both will go to my MILs Wed mornings. So I feel like I will only have all 3 all day on Mon and Fris which 3 of course is a lot but I think it's doable. On Wed and Thurs afternoons we will have lunch and then my middle will take his nap, and babies sleep so much during the day. Maybe I am being optimistic but it'll be alright! You just make it work.
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