Is anyone interested in the plus size mom check in?

morristhecatmom · August 2014

I know with my previous BMB I felt like I had specific questions relating to being a plus size pregnant woman. There are questions that I'm sure all of us have (plus size or not) but specific responses from other plus size moms were helpful to me. I connected with a few other moms but I was wondering if there's anybody else in those shoes

I would be happy to head it up if there is interest!

cafecreme · August 2014

I was doing an exercise and eating accountability. Most of the plus size moms recommended it, but it's for everyone. I forgot to do it last week, but I'll be posting a new one today.

okayestmom12 · August 2014

Confession: I hate anything plus size specific. Why is is necessary to have a check in for us chubby bitches? Don't we have pregnancies just like "regular" bitches? (I know I did last time).

FTR, I'm totes plus size. I just don't like the singling out thing.

DragonflyDreaming · August 2014

I do feel that there are certain things plus sized mom's might have more info on (like best place to buy cute plus sized maternity clothes? ). But many questions can also be answered by any mommy!

Plus size hasn't really phased me since I'm well aware of my large size. Especially on a message board, it's not big deal to me. (Heck, I even posted a pic, so people can see me anyways :-P ).

I guess I don't mind either way as long as there's a place we can try to stay accountable! Thanks for posting the thread @cafecreme‌ .

morristhecatmom · August 2014

Sorry totally posted and ran, we had a crazy day. I guess with my pregnancy last time with Natalie I was shamed by others (not on TB, IRL) into thinking that I was a terrible person for getting pregnant overweight and that I was going to have all these problems etc. My former OB told me he would do my best to keep me out of the OR but "big girls like me typically have a hard time with vaginal delivery. You just don't have the stamina" Clearly that wasn't the case and I found a midwife who was a supportive provider and believed in my body's ability.

I also had no clue where to buy nursing clothes that would fit or anything like that. I agree that plus size women should be treated as normal average healthy pregnant women just like everyone else but that wasn't my experience to be treated that way and I wanted others to know they weren't alone. But if there is not an interest that's totally fine.

morristhecatmom · August 2014

And I guess I don't look at the label of plus size as singling myself out. I just look at it as a category I fit into like second time mom or stay at home mom etc. It's absolutely a part of me but doesn't define me. It's something about me that I may have questions that specifically pertaining to that. But I get if other people feel that way.

Edit for clarity

morristhecatmom · August 2014

Sorry I'm kind of working backwards through the comments. The food and exercise accountability check-in is great but it doesn't necessarily apply to me. It's not something I am personally working on right now outside of making sure I get a few walks in here and there and making good food choices like I would whether not I was pregnant.

finallyourturn2 · August 2014

I would definitely be in. I didn't think anything of being plus sized and pregnant at first, but Dr Google had me a little paranoid. I have pretty much gotten over most of the paranoia about the pregnancy but now have it about my doctor (who I haven't met yet) and the doctor/hospital staff at delivery.

selena61307 · August 2014

I will probably read and try to help if I can, my weight is a huge issue and trigger for me so I may not post often.

morristhecatmom · August 2014

selena61307 said:
I will probably read and try to help if I can, my weight is a huge issue and trigger for me so I may not post often.

Take care of you. I totally understand and it's only recently that I've been able to be vocal about my weight and feel comfortable with it.

caribeth80 · August 2014

I'm in. Where is the check in?

morristhecatmom · August 2014

I figure will pick a day and start with some questions. I haven't gotten that far lol

morristhecatmom · August 2014

Judgment isn't something I've had to worry about on TB when it comes to me posting plus size pictures. I don't think this core group of ladies will have any problems being respectful either!

cafecreme · August 2014

I am proud of my body. Yes, I might of fallen off the wagon a bit after I had C, and pretty much at my heaviest, but all I can do right now is just make sure I eat healthy and get my exercise in. I don't feel "different" because I'm plus-sized. I guess maybe that's why I did the exercise and eating accountability- because we all have different shapes and sizes, and I see everyone as equal. I would still be willing to participate in a plus-sized thread though, and show off photos and a bump (when I get one).

And that whole thing about stamina isn't true. I went from 6-10cm's in 5 minutes, and pushed her out in just under 40 minutes. Ugh, that makes me so mad that a Dr. would tell you that.

ETA: I was also induced, and was in labor for 24 hours.

morristhecatmom · August 2014

That's one thing my midwife told me after I had Natalie. Because I felt like I was exhausted and dying all through pushing, she said "when I told you to push, you pushed. There were people half your size that quit pushing earlier than you, you delivered that baby I just caught her. After the shitty 36 hour labor you had you pushed until that baby was out you did everything you're supposed to do" I love her.

EDWHIP · August 2014

Lolagirl2012 said:

Sorry totally posted and ran, we had a crazy day. I guess with my pregnancy last time with Natalie I was shamed by others (not on TB, IRL) into thinking that I was a terrible person for getting pregnant overweight and that I was going to have all these problems etc. My former OB told me he would do my best to keep me out of the OR but "big girls like me typically have a hard time with vaginal delivery. You just don't have the stamina" Clearly that wasn't the case and I found a midwife who was a supportive provider and believed in my body's ability. I also had no clue where to buy nursing clothes that would fit or anything like that. I agree that plus size women should be treated as normal average healthy pregnant women just like everyone else but that wasn't my experience to be treated that way and I wanted others to know they weren't alone. But if there is not an interest that's totally fine.

THIS! And I will add that the last ten weeks of my pregnancy were spent in the hospital getting NSTs and ultrasounds because I was considered obese. A BMI over 30 is considered that. I'm 5 feet and weigh 176. DD1 came out healthy and everything was fine.

bumpuser10258960 · August 2014

I'm a plus sized mom and honestly, I don't have a problem with being "singled out". I have a problem with keeping up with so many check-ins. Weekly ticker change, daily symptoms, Weekly health accountability, etc. I just think its getting a bit ridiculous to have so many weekly check-ins.

If I have any "plus-sized" related question, I'll definitely be asking it and looking for responses from everyone who may have help or suggestions for me.

kaydedid · August 2014

I'm in! It'd be nice to have a dedicated group of plus - sized ladies- sometimes it's hard to ask questions for fear of what others might say.
Also, am loving the research starting to come out that is showing that activity level and fitness is just as (maybe more ) important than size. I am so sick of people acting incredulous when I talk to them about fitness. Yes, I'm 5'8, 270 lbs and I jog/run! No, I don't eat junk food or watch tv, and probably have a healthier lifestyle than most Americans - get over it.

Edited to sound less hypocritical - ms has me laying on the couch eating carbs all day. But someone's choices are still their own, and weighing less than me does not give you a license make judgements on my life.

finallyourturn2 · August 2014

I just had my first Dr's appointment and the doctor didn't say a word about my weight. The only thing he mentioned is that I should not gain more that 15 pounds and should be exercising and eating well. No speech on the possibilities of baby being in danger or high blood pressure or GD. Hopefully this sets the tone. I did ask him if it was okay if I didn't gain anything and he said absolutely and he has even seen people at my weight lose a little. As long as baby is growing well he is okay with that. I am 5'7" and at that appointment I was 312. The nurse said my blood pressure was perfect as of now.

okayestmom12 · August 2014

barbarainfante said:

I would definitely be in. I didn't think anything of being plus sized and pregnant at first, but Dr Google had me a little paranoid. I have pretty much gotten over most of the paranoia about the pregnancy but now have it about my doctor (who I haven't met yet) and the doctor/hospital staff at delivery.

Oh gosh - please try not to worry! If your doctor harps on it or makes you feel uncomfortable, find a new one. Keep us posted!

suzyq0525 · August 2014

barbarainfante said:
I would definitely be in. I didn't think anything of being plus sized and pregnant at first, but Dr Google had me a little paranoid. I have pretty much gotten over most of the paranoia about the pregnancy but now have it about my doctor (who I haven't met yet) and the doctor/hospital staff at delivery.

I felt the same way as you until I went in today and met my dr. He didn't say a peep about my weight. He said to gain between 15 and 25 pounds during this pregnancy, and even said its hard to expect somebody to gain only 15 pounds and to not be ashamed if it's more. Loved him!

anniehearts · August 2014

I could use some definate support thru this.

my dr. With my first one stressed so much it made me stress. We've got our first appt set with her but I'm not looking forward to it. I am plus sized- 240lbs ATM. But with my first pg I lost 35lbs. She came out great- I had GD. & so I really watched what I ate & my BS levels. I had stess tests & multiple ultrasounds- she even sent me to a specialist 4 hours away (totally unnecessary- they asked why I was even there). ALOT of money & stress for me later- I didn't feel like I had the confidence to go thru delivery. BUT! I'm a strong independant beautiful woman & I delivered my daughter in 10 hours. I felt amazing. Trying to embrace that as I make the decision to go to the same dr. Or change.

BP1979 · August 2014

So, here's my question.. especially for those of you who have been through this before. I know I'm supposed to only gain 15-20 pounds. But HOW do I do that? So far I've just been really vigilant bout eating as healthy as possible despite nausea and charting weight regularly to keep track of any gain. I also googled some weekly weight gain charts where I could put in my info and it tells me what I should weigh on any given week. But, I feel like it may be hard to have much control over gain in 2nd & 3rd trimesters. If the baby puts on weight or I retain fluid or any number of other things, then I could end up gaining more than anticipated. So, what have you ladies found most helpful for keeping weight gain to a minimum while ensuring healthy baby?

okayestmom12 · August 2014

@BP1979 - I can't say I did anything specific. If I had a craving, I allowed myself to indulge. I didn't overthink it (which I really think helps). I ate like I normally ate, while upping my water intake. I gained 9 lbs and DD was 9 lbs 5 oz.

finallyourturn2 · August 2014

If you are eating very healthy and walking you will be fine. You will probably lose tri 1and part of tri 2. You are burning way more calories than normal and will be until you are done nursing if you are going to.

jacqueleen1 · August 2014

I'm in. There are some questions I am sure I will have. Like my doctor testing me for gestational diabetes earlier and twice due to weight. Problem is my OB is kinda a bitch. She is one of the best but when she talked about my weight with me she kind of made me feel like shit. She is actually the one who told me to have Bariatric surgery. I went the less harsh route and have a lap band because I didn't want to complicate future pregnancy with a more drastic approach.

morristhecatmom · August 2014

@BP1979‌ - my ability to the eat quantities I previously had diminished once my uterus is pressing up against my stomach. I ended up eating lots of small meals and I actually lost weight during pregnancy. All you can really do is try to make good choices but try not to deprive yourself. Deprived pregnant mama makes no one happy.

cosmama · August 2014

I would be interested if this happens.

cafecreme · August 2014

@bp1979, just maintain a healthy eating habit and try to get your exercise in. With my 1st I calorie counted, maybe not every day, but enough where I could figure out what my limit was with food.

Another good tip: Don't start upping your calorie intake until 3rd tri.

With my 1st, I only gained 5lbs up until the end of 2nd tri, and in the 3rd I gained 12. Mainly because I was like "Screw it I'm going to eat what I want".

Now that it's getting cooler out, a nice walk outside is very beneficial, even if it's just for 30 mins.

caribeth80 · August 2014

It's so hard to eat healthy when you are nauseated and the only thing that sounds good is salty french fries and a coke

Hopefully the sickness and aversion to veggies will be over soon and I can get on a healthy track for the rest of my pregnancy.

wishiwaspreggo · August 2014

I'd love a plus-size check in! I'm a big girl so it helps to talk to others in the same boat. I especially want help with maternity shopping. I'm too nervous to even look around yet. Lane Bryant is already so freaking expensive, I'm scared I'm going to end up buying moo-moo style dresses and looking like a hot mess.

I'm also worried I'm going to be one of those pregnant ladies you kind of feel sorry for. The ones who are sweating, waddling, swollen, and complaining about hemorrhoids. Maybe that will be all of us one day, but still. It's my fear.

Dr. Google is like "Ermahgerd you're obese so you're going to DIIIIIIIIIE!" But the truth is plenty of obese women have babies without issue so I'm less worried about it. I actually think my metabolism is increasing because I've been pigging out but haven't gained any weight. I guess it makes sense since it has to be pretty draining on the ol' bod to build another human being.

I'm getting some daily exercise by peddling on my bike and eating more fruits and veggies. I think that's the best any of us can do. Just don't *try* to lose weight, but attempt to keep weight gain to a minimum, and I think we'll be good!

cafecreme · August 2014

@wishiwaspreggo, I found Motherhood and Old Navy online to have a really good selection of plus-size maternity. H&M has some good stuff if your teeter-tottering on XL/1X.

I have a 20$ off 100$ if you're interested. I have pretty much every style of top/bottoms made by Motherhood and Old Navy, so if you have a question about anything, such as fit, just PM me.

bdazzld · August 2014

I'd be interested!

I actually swapped OBs because as soon as I started talking about TTC my last new OB prescribed me HBC and said she wouldn't allow me to become pregnant until I lost 20% of my weight...

She also told me that my husband and I should get genetic counseling and think really hard about whether we should have children or not due to our "health" issues...which really aren't that many and most not hereditary or if they are, are easily lived with.

Example, my 1/2 aunt is manic depressive, my mom had thalassemia and my husband's sister and niece have a hearing defect of some sort. I'm not a carrier and neither is my husband for thalassemia--so...no concern there and the others well they are manageable. She was a really nasty person

Shopping for clothing has been pretty rough

so I feel you there. Torrid just had a big sale so I got some tops that are +1 my usual size, I have an offband I bought on amazon

and I've never worn Jeggings before but ya know? They are definitely comfortable and leave room for that awful bloat.

suzyq0525 · August 2014

bdazzld said:
I'd be interested!

I actually swapped OBs because as soon as I started talking about TTC my last new OB prescribed me HBC and said she wouldn't allow me to become pregnant until I lost 20% of my weight...

She also told me that my husband and I should get genetic counseling and think really hard about whether we should have children or not due to our "health" issues...which really aren't that many and most not hereditary or if they are, are easily lived with.

Example, my 1/2 aunt is manic depressive, my mom had thalassemia and my husband's sister and niece have a hearing defect of some sort. I'm not a carrier and neither is my husband for thalassemia--so...no concern there and the others well they are manageable. She was a really nasty person

Shopping for clothing has been pretty rough so I feel you there. Torrid just had a big sale so I got some tops that are +1 my usual size, I have an offband I bought on amazon and I've never worn Jeggings before but ya know? They are definitely comfortable and leave room for that awful bloat.

She said she wouldn't allow you to become pregnant? What kind of shit is that? That makes me feel stabby!

bdazzld · August 2014

After I called my husband crying that was my overall feeling yeah

so I filed a complaint and changed OBs.

Loved the next one but she's not covered on my HMO. The new guy is alright. His only sign of concern was to ask me to do an early glucose. *shrug* Prior to conception my numbers have always been good. I eat right etc whole grains lean proteins yadayada But exercise is my issue thanks to dual hip replacements.

But I'm working on it! Recumbent bike and walking the dog with my husband. My action item this pregnancy is to move more, starting 15 mins every other day and then progressing to 15 every day (or nearly) then 30.

cafecreme · August 2014

If you gals don't mind me asking, what sizes are you all?

I was a size 14/16 1st pregnancy, this one I'm at 16/18. I can still fit into some 14 dresses since my top/ bust is smaller.

morristhecatmom · August 2014

I'm a 3X, 22/24 mostly. Very apple shaped.

jacqueleen1 · August 2014

I dont mind. I'm a 16 for dresses, 18 for jeans and L/ XL for shirts. I'm built funny Xtra large down bottom and smaller up top. I can't fit into size 14 dresses since my boobs are too big I'm a D.

caribeth80 · August 2014

I was a size 12/14 when I got pregnant with my first and now I'm a 16/18 going into my second pregnancy. Obviously I didn't lose my first baby weight

cafecreme · August 2014

jacqueleen1 said:
I dont mind. I'm a 16 for dresses, 18 for jeans and L/ XL for shirts. I'm built funny Xtra large down bottom and smaller up top. I can't fit into size 14 dresses since my boobs are too big I'm a D.

I have bigger boobs too, but I guess my band size is a little smaller. My boobs never fluctuated with weight.

DragonflyDreaming · August 2014

Thing I'm at an 18 at the moment! Would have loved to have been less, but hey, maybe next baby!

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