best strategy to handle drop-offs?

Re: best strategy to handle drop-offs?

• SunAndRain member

  August 2014

  I'm sure it is impossible for your to describe all the details but I know when my DD cries when I drop her off at DC the teacher is 100% on top of distracting her, quickly getting her involved with an activity with the other kids, etc.  So my first question is whether they are actively trying to do that with your son.  Or do they just expect him to join on his own with minimal encouragement?

  Personally, I'd keep trying.  And when they called me next time I would personally try to get DS engaged in the class.  At the very least I would sit on the sidelines with him so that he could see all the kids having fun.  Maybe that would encourage him to join in with the added comfort of you (or your parents) being there.  Then once he got used to it I'd start dropping him off again.

  Also, you say your son is stubborn. Not sure if you mean more than the average 2 year old.  Sounds like he is crying because he WANTS something: for his family to come get him. This is normal behavior, no? How are situations handled when he cries for other things he wants?  Do you give in to keep the peace or let him cry it out?  

  Lastly, 90 minutes seems like a long time for a class that isn't part of his daily routine.  This is why I like daycare to be at least 4 days per week.  It becomes their "normal".  How old are the other kids in the class? 

  
  

  I'd be interested to hear when the other moms will suggest!

  Report0 Reply
• Loading the player...
• shannm member

  August 2014

  Who is dropping him off? With my kids, that really affects the child's behavior. I find with mine, we have to be really confident, excited but kind of nonchalant at the same time, limit hugs and kisses, etc.. When DD recently started at a new daycare (just over 2 years) I had to use a sippy cup bribe at drop off. As in, lets go in and you get your cup and find your chair. Then she would sit down away from the other kids and have a chance to take it all in before joining them. Thankfully now she is comfortable enough that it is no longer necessary. So maybe the teachers would be ok with a little reward/distraction at dropoff like a few goldfish in his hand? Just to warn him up?

  Report0 Reply
• traveltheworld member

  August 2014

  DS is stubborn in the sense that he could cry for long bouts of time and distractions do not work with him. He responds best to reasoning. So we do a lot of natural consequences. As an example, he used to cry/scream if a car ride lasts more than 30 minutes. We took quite a few road trips this summer and he would cry/scream for an hour. We offered him snacks, ipad, new toys, nothing worked. Finally one time I told DH to just drop us off on the side of the highway and drive off. I then calmly explained to DS that he doesn't have to sit in the car, but then we would have to walk. I walked with him and would asked him every 5 minutes or so if he wanted me to call daddy to come back with the car. It was about 30 minutes of walking before he said yes. But ever since then, he has never complained about being in the car. But I don't know what the "natural consequence" could be for this situation.
  
  

  Report0 Reply
• emberlee3 member

  August 2014

  My DD is 2 yo and very outgoing, but she would probably freak out if I tried to drop her off for a 90 minute class.
  
  If grandparents need a break, then use daycare more. If LO needs socialization, then add play dates or classes where caregiver stays. Try the classes again in a few months.

  DS born 8/8/09 and DD born 6/12/12.
  

  Report0 Reply
• BabyHope2013 member

  August 2014

  Our DS has been going to DC full time since he was about 3 months old. Around 14-15 months he started to have a really hard time with us leaving him at drop-off. Our DC teacher would have to distract him---or we would have to get him set up with a toy or starting to eat breakfast before we would quickly tell him good bye and leave. 

  
  

  That being said, DS is 19 months old and we participate in extracurricular activities, but I always stay with him. I think that he would get scared and upset if he were alone in the unfamiliar environment. I would either try to stay with him for a whole class---even if you weren't be his side, just so he knows that he is safe and ok. Or if that wasn't a possibility then I would try those classes in a few months and maybe find something that he can do with you or another adult in his life. He just may not be ready to be independent on his own yet. 

  
  

  Report0 Reply