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OMG my mil has lost her mind

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Re: OMG my mil has lost her mind

  • acesupacesup member
    Holy shitballs. I would be furious as well and would never allow her to take the kids anywhere again- and it would take serious convincing to even let her watch them. Wow. I am super angry for you!
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  • acesupacesup member
    mstal0929 said:

    Seriously all I keep thinking is if someone would have hit them my baby wouldn't be here anymore. And then I cry and hug her. Ugh maybe I shouldn't go to this talk.

    (((Hugs))) try not to think about the "could haves". I get it though because I obsess over "could haves". The most important thing is that your LO is ok and you know about it!!
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  • mstal0929mstal0929 member
    MarlaSinger& said:


    mstal0929 said:

    No response yet this morning. And yes dh is 100% on my side. He was thinking we should take the weekend to think about what we want to do for sure because this will end the relationship with her, but after last night he agrees that she isn't remorseful at all and that's a bad sign.

    I am guessing she throws these tantrums often and then follows the tantrums with guilt if they don't work?  

    Do you have a good relationship with her otherwise?  I will admit to walking away from one of our parents because of a very similar relationship.  It became way too toxic because of similar reactions and boundary issues.  It was tough but at some point it actually becomes what is best.  I am not saying you should immediately jump to that but it's really her choice to end the relationship, not yours.  

    You are simply saying- My child is my priority, this is how it is going to be.  It's your choice how you react to that.  You are an adult.  I am not responsible for your feelings.


    Yea this is pretty much her mo. I don't have much of a relationship but dh does as he is her only child. I'm sad for him if he loses that for good.

     
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  • mstal0929mstal0929 member
    LucilleAustero said:

    Any posts about poor decision within a car makes me cry. My daughter would be dead if not for a properly installed carseat that she was properly secured in. Dead. We are lucky she did not die in the wreck she was in, even being in the carseat. I do not get how

    There are no excuses, no second chances, not in my book. This woman would never be allowed alone with DD again. And her reaction is bizarre. She should be on her hands and knees begging your forgiveness. She should be completely understanding of why you are so upset.

    And, this is just the one time that your daughter was there to witness things. What else has happened? I am, like, shaking mad for you.

    the bolded is exactly what keeps going through my mind. What else has she done that we don't know about. There were tons of other options and she chose the ONE choice that endangered my daughters life.

    Also, we asked her last night through text what she would have done if dd's babysitter had done this and we found out. She said that would be totally different be cause she is grandma so she would do anything to protect her and a babysitter wouldn't. We said it is no different. We chose you as care taker for our daughter, grandma or not. We trusted that you would keep her safe and make safe decisions for her, and you didn't. That's when she started with the well maybe I should just go away forever.

     
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  • mstal0929mstal0929 member

    omg, she just text DH and said she was sorry for everything she said and that she won't ever do it again and she knows how wrong it was. She just wants one more chance and she won't take DD anywhere again until she is old enough to not be in a car seat.

    I seriously want to bang my head against my desk because that is what she got out of this whole exchange.

     
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  • tattooedtragedytattooedtragedy member
    mstal0929 said:

    omg, she just text DH and said she was sorry for everything she said and that she won't ever do it again and she knows how wrong it was. She just wants one more chance and she won't take DD anywhere again until she is old enough to not be in a car seat.

    I seriously want to bang my head against my desk because that is what she got out of this whole exchange.


    I have to know what DH's reaction to this text was?

    I honestly read this thread with my mouth hanging open in shock- I don't understand how full grown adults can not grasp the concept here.


    ~*~*~You're Such A Pretty Melody, I'm Just Another Tattooed Tragedy~*~*~
    FKA: Mireland23  image
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  • ASmallWonderASmallWonder member
    Man, she's dense.  So when your daughter is old enough to be out of a car seat she'll be in a booster and then in a regular belt.  The concept of safety still applies and she isn't grasping that.  At all.  And if you couldn't trust her to use the seat she knew she had to use, why the hell does she think she should be trusted to stick to her word and not take her anywhere?  Newp.
    Formerly known as elmoali :)

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  • 4PrivetDrive4PrivetDrive member
    edited August 2014
    mstal0929 said:

    Dh responded with " we talked last night, and we really feel like this babysitting arrangement is putting too much strain on our relationship with you. We all love you, and want you to be a huge part of our lives but we feel like it would be beneficial to everyone involved if we found alternative childcare for dd. We will be happy to bring her to see you anytime, but we feel that our views on what is best for her differ too much and we don't want to ruin our relationship any further."

    I'm sure that will get a very mature response  8-|

    Seriously, bravo to this. I hope your MIL gets her head out of her ass, realizes she raised a great son, and takes responsibility for her actions and learns from them.

     
    Goob 01/26/12
    Olliekazam 08/18/14

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  • 4PrivetDrive4PrivetDrive member
    pobrecita said:

    @4privetdrive You really need to change your avatar.

    It's the only one I've had since I made the account, but I know, I've been lazy and need to do it.
     
    Goob 01/26/12
    Olliekazam 08/18/14

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  • mstal0929mstal0929 member
    Oh man, I got all excited that @hilarityensued commented on my post expecting something really funny, only to see it wasn't even about my post [-(
     
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  • snowboundsnowbound member
    Wow. I'm so sorry you had to deal with that. I would be incredibly mad and wouldn't leave my kid with her ever again.
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  • acesupacesup member
    Your DHs response gets a standing ovation in my book
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  • ASmallWonderASmallWonder member
    @danisgossipgirl that's a love tit of commiseration.  My mother is also borderline.
    Formerly known as elmoali :)

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