Car seat direction

memcgee1 · August 2014

This is probably going to sound like more of a rant than anything, but all of our LOs should still be rear facing in their car seats, right? I have seen 2 moms of LOs younger than my DD dropping their babes off at daycare sitting in car seats that are forward facing, and it takes all of my willpower not to say something. DDs pediatrician has stressed at every well-child visit that she needs to be rear facing until age 2. Are there any circumstances where you would elect to forward face before age 2 (other than reaching the 40 pound weight limit that most convertible car seats have)? Or am I just being super judgmental?

delino · August 2014

Only circumstances are if it's impossible for the car seat to be RF or child exceeds weight limit. I can't say for sure yet if I will keep her RF after 2, but I intend to.

memcgee1 · August 2014

SpankingShank said:

In my state it is law to have them RF until 1 year and 20lbs. After that they can FF. We plan to have her RF as long as possible, since it is recommended. I judge people FF who don't meet the requirements. Eta I actually had Vi FF a few days ago in a friends car because it was the only way her seat would fit without having to uninstall her sons seat. I figured it was a one off and a thirty minute drive, NBD.

My state law is the same as yours, and I can totally understand if it's an occasional need to put your LO in a FF seat. These are moms that have consciously turned their convertible car seats FF, and I just can't understand why anyone would take that unnecessary risk.

Blueyed228 · August 2014

Until it becomes the law to FF till 2, its a parents choice, so I don't make it my business what others choose to do. I might not agree but its still not my business to lecture them.

I have no plans to FF them anytime soon.

emmy236 · August 2014

I'll probably get flamed but I don't think R will be rear facing past 18 months. 1) he's already closing in on 30lbs and 35 inches. His feet hit the seat and his legs already look uncomfortable.
2) he fucking hates it. Car trips are tough and the one time we had him FF in my ILs car was the only time he was happy
3) our pediatrician is not nearly as concerned as some others seem to be. She agrees he needs to be RF past one but she also said at his size there is a better chance of him hitting his face to his knees if I stop short. She thought around 18/20 months he'll be at a size where we can turn him around. Luckily right now the extent of his car time is the 1.5 min ride to day care and grocery store so I can deal with the back seat protests.

flyliceandcoffee · August 2014

so, honestly? you're sounding a lil judgey. if the state law is 1 year and 20 lbs and they haven't met those requirements then feel free to judge away because they're breaking the law. other than that, it's a parents choice. you may not agree with it, I may not agree with it, but it's completely their choice.

memcgee1 · August 2014

flyliceandcoffee said:

so, honestly? you're sounding a lil judgey. if the state law is 1 year and 20 lbs and they haven't met those requirements then feel free to judge away because they're breaking the law. other than that, it's a parents choice. you may not agree with it, I may not agree with it, but it's completely their choice.

Fair enough. I can totally admit I'm judging. FWIW, I would never say anything to these parents because it is absolutely their choice how their children ride in their car so long as the law isn't being broken. So I guess I'm just secretly judging them.

FmrAFBrat · August 2014

My little man is the only 1 year old at daycare still RF...it's 1 and 20lbs. I did have a mom tell me to turn the boys around a few months ago & I didn't say much other than little guy weighed only 18lbs at his 1 year check & he still isn't big enough.

I did turn my 34 month old around a few weeks ago after I found out he weighs 40 lbs (the same day he puked in the car).

bumpuser8130818 · August 2014

It is one of the things I judge as well, but would never consider it my business to tell someone what they should be doing unless they didn't meet the 1 year 20lb minimum. Then I would probably say something if I knew them. I've seen people on fb talk about "cheating" and turning their 9 months old around. Definitely judging the hell out of that.

huzzahuzza · August 2014

J's still rear facing and I intend to keep it that way for as long as possible. The kids on the Car Seats for L ittles FB page all look so comfy rear facing. Even the older ones!

mommatotwo2 · August 2014

We intend to rear face as long as possible as well. She's around 23 lbs and Im guessing around 32 inches and she's still perfectly comfortable in her Chicco Nextfit. Even if her legs are folded up, I am still going to rear face her. I've seen too many horrible video re-enactments and read too many horrible stories to turn her any sooner than I absolutely have too.

FWIW- We only rear faced DD1 until she was about 16 months old, and it was in her infant seat. That was 5 years ago and we didn't know we should rear face her for longer. She's six years old now, 48 pounds and Im not sure how many inches, but she is still five point harnessed (front facing) and our Britax goes up 85 pounds in a five point. I'm not sure how much longer we'll keep her in a five point, most of her friends have been in a belt positioning booster for 2 years at this point. But car seat safety is a big deal to me. It doesn't matter how well you drive or how careful you are- there are a lot of idiots on the road.

TrulyBlessed22 · August 2014

Our law is the same 1 and 20 and while we plan on RF as long as possible, I honestly don't know how that will be because her legs are pushed up against the seat to the point where we had to recline the seat to allow her to fit more comfortabally. She's petite and I don't know of it's the car or the car seat or what but it doesn't look very comfortable for her legs. I actually plan on talking to our Ped about it at the 15 month visit to get her thoughts on having the seat reclined, FF before 2 etc.

I have a Nissan Murano and she's in a very nice Britax. I'm only staying that in case anyone has any tips on placement etc?

ETA - my township has a free car seat inspection/installation at the police station at the end of each month and I plan on going to the one this month to get there thoughts on RF with the seat reclined or maybe the car seat isn't installed as it should be.

FmrAFBrat · August 2014

Here's a pic of my oldest earlier this summer. He wasn't really ever squished but hit the weight limit. Some car seat manufacturers do allow a more upright position for babies over 22 lbs.

jesselayne8 · August 2014

My 2.5 yr old is still RFing and I plan to keep DS RFing as long as possible. If my kids were puking every time they got in the car from motion sickness, I would probably turn them as long as they meet the weight/age requirements of the laws.

blush64 · August 2014

Blueyed228 said:

Until it becomes the law to FF till 2, its a parents choice, so I don't make it my business what others choose to do. I might not agree but its still not my business to lecture them. I have no plans to FF them anytime soon.

I agree with this. I plan to keep A RF as long as I can but others can choose to do as they see fit.(and is legal) My family actually disagrees with my choice but that's another issue.

jmevol · August 2014

Some food for thought -
https://thestir.cafemom.com/toddler/120133/proof_that_older_taller_kids

I plan on keeping LO rf as long as possible. I don't personally think kids know the difference (when giving a reason such as they like looking out the window, etc) unless you make a big deal about it to the child. A lot of times I feel parents project their feelings (about various things, not just this) and claim the idea as their child's to justify their actions.

As far as I can tell, all go though periods of hating the carseat, whether rf or ff.

surpriseaddition · August 2014

We just did a 12 hour trip (each way) last week. We started the trip with her RF as usual, but she was twisting to look around at the video screen we have in our van. I never use the thing now that my other kids are older, but they wanted to watch movies to make the trip more tolerable. We did pull off and turn her around, because I was worried she'd be more hurt in such a contorted position trying to see the screen than FF (if we were in an accident). We turned it back around once we arrive, and then did FF for the 12 hours home. She's about 27 lbs and was 31 inches back at her 1 year check, so it was legal, but I plan on keeping RF until age 2.

pnutg · August 2014

My son is very big, as most of you know, and he's still rear facing comfortably. We'll keep him that way as long as possible. FF will certainly make things easier on me as far as lifting him in and out. All in due time.

telicious2 · August 2014

Our family and friends keep telling us that we should FF DS bc he will be a new baby based on how much he hates being in the car. As much as I want a quieter ride I want him RF until 2. Even pedi mentioned RF until 2. I have learned to tune out his screaming tantrums.

I think if a child was to FF before 2 then the better placement may be the middle.

MamaMD · August 2014

jmevol said:

I plan on keeping LO rf as long as possible. I don't personally think kids know the difference (when giving a reason such as they like looking out the window, etc) unless you make a big deal about it to the child. A lot of times I feel parents project their feelings (about various things, not just this) and claim the idea as their child's to justify their actions. As far as I can tell, all go though periods of hating the carseat, whether rf or ff.

Totally agree with this. My LO has always RF so she doesn't know any different at this point as far as I can tell.

JulieK79 · August 2014

I joined that Facebook group awhile ago after someone recommended it on here. I've learned so much from that group!

MAdams728 · August 2014

L is RF, and will be until she is 2, at least.

What I really hate, and see entirely too often, are chest clips down low on bellies with loose straps.

emmy236 · August 2014

I'm really not trying to stir the pot but @jmevol cafemom is a blog. I'm not saying that she is wrong. However, in my world I need sources, legislation, peer reviews etc for me to take it for full truth. There are fantastic articles out there from the New England Journal of Medicine, AAP, etc. There isn't any real scientific research done on this blog, just pictures of kids sitting in a still car and being told to smile. I'm like everyone here and know that I want the best for my child but there are a lot of articles out there trying to turn opinion into fact and we just need to be conscious of the difference.

::off soap box::

jmevol · August 2014

@emmy236 oh I know, I even contemplated saying "I know this isn't a legit source" but if you google about rear facing you can find sources...there is a Facebook page called carseats for the littles or something like that & they frequently have articles and such on the subject. I just thought I'd post since a few had mentioned their feet/knees starting to stick up against the back of the seat, and that was the first one I found..I'm too tired to look for more at the moment.

littledaisies · August 2014

I recently turned the carseat to FF. I planned on keeping it RF for as long as possible but after a discussion it with our doctor I decided to turn it around. I did have the seat inspected at the police station and had the officer show us the proper placing of the chest belt. Our pediatrician stressed, RF or FF, if you're not using the seat properly it can be very dangerous.

emmy236 · August 2014

Now I'm not a doctor/physicist but I always wondered, yes if they are forward facing and you get in a head on collision the internal decapitation can happen. Physics says a body in motion will stay in motion unless stopped by an external force. So if you are driving 40 mph and you are hit by something going 50 (assuming same size vehicle) not only will that stop your car but give 10mphxcar weight in the opposite direction which is what causes the internal decapitation. (A whipping effect) I got that.

But Newton's Second law also says a body at rest will stay at rest unless it is affected by an outside force . So someone like me who lives in a city, it's much more common to be rear ended at a stop light. If I'm at a dead stop and I'm rear ended by someone going 40mph. That's 40mphxweight of the car (f=ma). That is a toddler head going from a dead stop to being whipped forward due to this new acceleration. RF and FF are relative to the direction of the acceration. He's RF in accordance to the position of the engine of the car, but he's FF the force of the impending crash. Our car seat has the same recline setting that can be used both ways so his angel isn't changing. Shouldn't the same outcome occur?

(This is me just pondering this notion)

PumpkinAndThePeanut · August 2014

Statistically, the chances of a rear-end collision being hard enough to do that sort of damage are very low. Whereas a head-on collision is likely to be at higher speeds.

mytinc · August 2014

We still have DS rear facing in both of our cars and in my parent's car. But he's forward facing when he's in the sitter's car. This is because she drives around multiple kids and can't fit his seat backwards when she has 3 seats across. We're ok with that. Law here is also 1 year/20 lbs but it is suggested to wait until 2 years. I say to each their own.

nbatchen · August 2014

We have recently went to ff. My goal was 18 months but car rides were becoming a war zone to just get him in the seat. He has always been a baby who likes to stretch out and he was no longer able to do this. He started arching his back trying to fight me when putting him in the car and would then scream most of the trip. Turned him off and he is happy as a clam! He is a bigger baby and does meet the law requirements though.

Lolalipsy · August 2014

There's no law for it here in the UK but I got a rear facing seat that my LO will use up until she's 4yo.

jedimindtrick · August 2014

emmy236 said:
Now I'm not a doctor/physicist but I always wondered, yes if they are forward facing and you get in a head on collision the internal decapitation can happen. Physics says a body in motion will stay in motion unless stopped by an external force. So if you are driving 40 mph and you are hit by something going 50 (assuming same size vehicle) not only will that stop your car but give 10mphxcar weight in the opposite direction which is what causes the internal decapitation. (A whipping effect) I got that.

But Newton's Second law also says a body at rest will stay at rest unless it is affected by an outside force . So someone like me who lives in a city, it's much more common to be rear ended at a stop light. If I'm at a dead stop and I'm rear ended by someone going 40mph. That's 40mphxweight of the car (f=ma). That is a toddler head going from a dead stop to being whipped forward due to this new acceleration. RF and FF are relative to the direction of the acceration. He's RF in accordance to the position of the engine of the car, but he's FF the force of the impending crash. Our car seat has the same recline setting that can be used both ways so his angel isn't changing. Shouldn't the same outcome occur?

(This is me just pondering this notion)

Yea, that could cause some damage but being rear-ended hardly causes that much force. In most accidents the brakes are hit. And hit pretty hard, causing whiplash. That could cause some damage to that little neck. And as you already addressed, a head on collision could be catastrophic.

Obviously you can't prepare for every situation. But RF protects them from the most dangerous situations.

Funny, I explained the RF vs FF thing to my students when teaching Newton's Laws. The kids' responses were "then why don't we rear face!?" lol

snowgirl427 · August 2014

We are keeping LO RF until 2... just because it's our personal choice.

Boo0512 · August 2014

OP, you're being a little judgey. However, I do think as a rule if your vehicle will allow it, it's best to keep your child RF until at least 2. That's my plan.

I know the laws are the laws and its a personal choice but the scientific research supports longer RF. I just want LOs to be safe. I would never say anything to someone as long as their child meets the minimum requirements but I'm hopeful that parents will choose to keep their child RF as long as possible.

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