I need to vent. (NBSR) — The Bump
Baby Showers

I need to vent. (NBSR)

I'm so upset I could cry (and I probably will later).

DH and I have been house hunting for at least 7 months.  We looked casually for about a year before that but we've been regularly checking ads and seeing houses for about the last 7 months with our realtor.

We saw one on Friday that was pretty perfect.  The outside needed work (wood shingle, very ugly pea soup green paint, cracked cement patio in the back) but the inside was great - lots of space, five bedrooms,  closets everywhere, a little more and a half-acre in the back.  We loved it.

We made an appointment to see it again tonight with his parents (who are helping us with a down payment) and I just got a text from our realtor saying that the sellers accepted an offer so the house was basically taken out from under us.

I'm so angry.  I wanted that house.  We both wanted it.  I know it was putting the cart before the horse since we hadn't even made an offer but DH sent a link to the house to our realtor MONTHS ago and he never got back to us.  Granted, we didn't follow up either but isn't it his job to get us in to see the houses we send him?  I just feel like he's not working as hard as he should to get us into a house.  This isn't the first time we've asked him to get us in to see a house and he's either forgotten or not been aggressive enough and then all of a sudden the house is gone.  He's in school and has another job and is an all-around busy guy.  I feel like we are not a priority.

We don't need to move before the baby arrives, we could make our house work for a little bit but I really don't need the extra stress of house hunting, mortgage crap, packing, moving and settling into a new house with an infant and a toddler (and two dogs.) 

I know I'm hormonal but I'm raging.  I want to fire our realtor and find someone else.

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Re: I need to vent. (NBSR)

  • It sounded like he did his job. The owners could of had a offer two nights prior and were going back and forth until they agreed upon something. It sucks but when it comes to house buying it's pretty much who gets it first. We looked for a full yeah and put in 7 different offers in our area. Homes were under contract around here within two days of listing. We had a house to sell which made it tricky for us and in turn hurt us each time. Just remember if it's really the house for you it will work out. Out of the 7 we put contracts on we are so happy we actually didn't get them. At the time we were heart broken. It will happen. Try not to blame your realtor. Other realtors don't always communicate as well. 

    Married: 5/09 ~ TTC Since: 10/10 ~ PCOS ~ Progesterone from 10/10 - 2/11 ~ HSG on 3/18 - Clear ~ Started Metformin 1000mg & Clomid 50mg 2/11 ~ Metformin upped to 1500mg 4/6 ~ 6/7 Now going to SG and put on Clomid, Ovidrel, Gonal F, Prometrium, Estrace ~ IUI #1 7/2 = BFP!!!!!! March 6th our little man was born. 

    6/17/13 - Ovidrel, Follistim, Prometrium ~ IUI #1 7/2 = BFP! March 17th our St. Pattys day baby arrived

    10/29/17 - Started process for IVF, got pregnant & miscarried a 2nd time since summer. 2/22 started stims - Menopur, Gonal F, Cetrotide - retrieval 3/6 - , PIO, estrace 3xday - FET 4/18 = Beta 1: 616; Beta 2: 1342 = BFP 

  • I totally understand it's first offer accepted and we're SOL, it's just that we asked him months ago to get us in to see that house and he didn't because he was too busy with other things. 

    This was fun and is just no longer fun.  I'm frustrated.  I just want this to be over.

    Come on, house fairy!  We need a new house!

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  • Well then if that is the case then the way I see it he needs to get you in asap and once your in you all need to make a decision fast too. That is what we started doing. If we liked it we jumped on it. 

    Married: 5/09 ~ TTC Since: 10/10 ~ PCOS ~ Progesterone from 10/10 - 2/11 ~ HSG on 3/18 - Clear ~ Started Metformin 1000mg & Clomid 50mg 2/11 ~ Metformin upped to 1500mg 4/6 ~ 6/7 Now going to SG and put on Clomid, Ovidrel, Gonal F, Prometrium, Estrace ~ IUI #1 7/2 = BFP!!!!!! March 6th our little man was born. 

    6/17/13 - Ovidrel, Follistim, Prometrium ~ IUI #1 7/2 = BFP! March 17th our St. Pattys day baby arrived

    10/29/17 - Started process for IVF, got pregnant & miscarried a 2nd time since summer. 2/22 started stims - Menopur, Gonal F, Cetrotide - retrieval 3/6 - , PIO, estrace 3xday - FET 4/18 = Beta 1: 616; Beta 2: 1342 = BFP 

  • Honestly, yeah I would find another realtor.  When were were looking, our realtor was very good when it came to getting back with us and would try to set up viewings as soon as she could.  
  • Find a new realtor.
    This.
    Anniversary

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Find a new realtor. Also decide quickly. We went to an open house for the place we live in and put a contract on it 2 hours into the showing. There were 4 other offers after us but ours was the first and the best. That is how we won our home. You have to really be aggressive. Good luck. It is not fun buying a house. I was so stressed the whole time.
    BFP #1: It's a GIRL! DD born October, 2012
    BFP #2: m/c at 7w, February, 2014
    BFP #3: It's a BOY! Please be our rainbow! Due February, 2015
    *everyone always welcome*
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  • @bluedaisy2001, we didn't even correspond via email, it was texting and by phone and DH sees him weekly at the bar (I did too until I got KU)

    I really feel like he dropped the ball, he doesn't make us a priority.  I'm going to contact another realtor later this week.

    Thanks everyone.  It's a rollercoaster.

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  • No big deal.  DH texted him, I text him.  Sometimes we hear back right away, sometimes not. 
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  • Sorry that stinks! 

    I have not yet been in the position to house hunt myself, but maybe can you tell yourself that if there was one house you guys fell in love with, there's bound to be another?

    I know that's maybe not the most comforting thing, but it might help with perspective, which I know is hard to come by sometimes when pregnant. And sometimes even not pregnant.

     

    BFP 1- EDD 2/09/11 Missed MC DX @11 weeks D&C- 7/25/10 BFP 2- EDD 12/22/11 Natural MC @ 5w 2d BFP 3- EDD 1/25/12 DD Josephine born 1/16/12

    Lilypie - (TUWi)

     

  • 526SadieSadie526SadieSadie member
    edited July 2014
    Thanks bluedaisy and Helena.  I'm trying to keep that in mind.  I just really want this over with.  Like I said, it was fun but it's just not fun anymore.
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  • We had a negative experience using a friend as realtor too.  Nothing as bad as your story, but I feel your pain.  Next time we are going to use a stranger who we will not feel guilty about letting go if it isn't working out.

    Oscar born October 2011

    Miscarriage at 8 weeks (August 2013)

    DD due September 1, 2014

    BabyFruit Ticker

  • Well, here's hoping that you find another house that makes you happy you lost out on the first one.
    BabyFruit Ticker Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
  • You need a Realtor that does this full time. I can't believe you asked him months ago to see this home. 

    You also need to decide if you are willing to be a little more aggressive about your home search. He may have thought you were not really serious. 

    When my buyers find a home they want to see, we are in there within 24 hours (more often quicker than that). It is all about timing. 

    I also truly believe if this was supposed to be your home, it would have worked out. 
  • Yeah, you need to find another realtor.

    We got preapproved and had an offer on a house two weeks later. And I am super picky and we are in a good market with not many houses for sale at the time. Basically what we did was first decide on the area. The area is always #1. We only had two areas (based on schools and distance to work) we were okay with so that narrowed it down. Then we looked at all houses for sale in those areas within our range. We made a list and drove by them. We then could mark off most of them because the neighborhood didn't feel right or some other thing. For the ones with empty rooms shown on listing we would go up and peek in the windows.

    So we called a realtor that our lender recommended and gave her a list of 7 houses we wanted to tour. We toured houses just one day. The first one on our list, when I got back in the car I told my husband "that's it!" and we looked at the others anyways. We put a competitive (not low ball) offer in and it was accepted. closed 30 days later. Smooth as pie and probably the easiest job the realtor ever did. I am just saying this to say that if you want to find a house FAST then you need to do a lot of the work yourself and make lists of good houses you find online. A good realtor is essential, especially once you are in escrow so you need to fire this guy. Also you may check with your parents and see if they are okay with you putting in an offer on a house they haven't seen. You are buying it after all and it's not their decision. Time is of the essence on these things.
    BabyFetus Ticker
  • This seems obvious but also look below your budget. We were approved for $180K but our perfect house was $140K. If I had set the parameters in zillow to $150K + we would have never had it on our list. 
    BabyFetus Ticker
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