Teachers and tattoos

lexusolsen · August 2014

Are they professional/ appropriate?

Brought to you since I'm considering getting ds' name and stillbirth date with a small butterfly on my wrist.

Here's the backstory:

I'm a tenured teacher and it would take a lot more than a tattoo for my current district to fire me. I don't think the principal at my school would even notice or care.

However, most of the teachers I have encountered who have visible tattoos are in the art department not the English department. I always thought if I got a tattoo that it would be some where easily hidden. But with this tattoo I don't care. I know part of that is that most people considered still births taboo. So this tattoo is about remembering ds and showing the world that I won't hide the fact that I have two children.

This tattoo will shock most people who know me. This is outside of my traditional, good girl wheelhouse.

Also, last year one of my students decided she wanted a tattoo just before her 18 birthday. I strongly advised her to wait, to make sure it was something she really wanted. I know that because of that, many of my students in that class (Many who I will have again in the same elective this year) think I don't like tattoos (not true, I just didn't want her to be a someone who regretted getting a tattoo without much thought put into it). So I'm trying to take my own advice. I don't want to be a hypocrite.

MesmrEwe · August 2014

How about this - give it a year to research artists and butterflies. Find a true ARTIST to do the work because this is something with such deep meaning for you, not just the local guy on the corner with the neon sign. Do not be afraid to travel. Really review their work with a critical eye to make sure you aren't seeing a bunch of photoshopped images(!!!) - because this happens a lot more than you'd think given what my tattoo artist friends have dealt with. Ask around - if you see someone who has had work done and you say "WOW!" to the art in their design, ask who they had do that one. Also, this is not something you price shop on, so use the time to put aside some money for the work - great artists get paid and need to make a living too.

dizzycooks · August 2014

I don't think it's a big deal. As far as being a hypocrite you are not 17, you have thought about it, it has meaning and is not being done in a drunken stupor. If anyone frowns on it I would just point out that it's in memory of your son. Anyone with a hint of compassion will shut up and let it go. Truly, I do not think it's a big deal, but a sweet reminder of your baby.

lexusolsen · August 2014

This is what I'm thinking. I put it on my wrist yesterday but it isn't as legible when I did it there.

rosesandpetals · August 2014

I don't have a problem with it. Some things I would consider... Will you want to switch jobs? Another district may have more conservative views and may not like a visible tattoo. If they want you to cover it up for parent-teacher conferences, would you be willing/able to do that? I know there's different types of make-up you can use if a shirt wouldn't reach it.

And I would probably decide ahead of time what you want to say to people who ask about it. With his name right there, they will probably ask who he is and of course you don't have to tell everyone but I would decide how much detail to give people ahead of time so you aren't caught off guard.

The drawing looks really nice, I think it's very sweet and I can't imagine anyone giving you professional trouble over it.

Spin313 · August 2014

How big would it be...? Could you cover it (if necessary) with a cuff bracelet...?

I think tattoos are pretty common nowadays, but IMO professionals should have tattoos that can be covered if need be (like for PT conferences).

lexusolsen · August 2014

rosesandpetals said:
I don't have a problem with it. Some things I would consider... Will you want to switch jobs? Another district may have more conservative views and may not like a visible tattoo. If they want you to cover it up for parent-teacher conferences, would you be willing/able to do that? I know there's different types of make-up you can use if a shirt wouldn't reach it.

And I would probably decide ahead of time what you want to say to people who ask about it. With his name right there, they will probably ask who he is and of course you don't have to tell everyone but I would decide how much detail to give people ahead of time so you aren't caught off guard.

The drawing looks really nice, I think it's very sweet and I can't imagine anyone giving you professional trouble over it.

That's a great point. The district I currently work in is a large urban district and the suburban district I live in is much more conservative. I would be ok with covering it for certain events if I really had to. Although, i do know people who work in that district with visible tattoos. Am I being naive to think it would be covered (or mostly covered) the inside of my left wrist if I wore a cardigan or jacket?

I actually love talking about him, although sometimes it is difficult. When people ask about the memorial necklace I wear, I say it's my son's footprints and name. I don't tell every person who asks the necklace that he was stillborn. I would do the same about the tattoo. I decided on my wrist because I can't always wear my necklace and i wanted it where I could see it too.

thechickencoop · August 2014

I agree that I probably wouldn't think twice about it if you had a visible tattoo. Well, maybe something vulgar would make me raise an eyebrow....but I think yours is completely appropriate. I don't think you need to do major shopping around or anything, but obviously use a reputable tattoo artist and double/triple check the spelling, dates, etc.

catycate · August 2014

I used to teach and I have visible tattoos and no one has ever said anything to me, nor has it stopped me from getting a job! It sounds like a lovely way to keep him close.

mrsnala · August 2014

Lurker here- I have a wrist tattoo (not a teacher but a professional) and I have a nice watch that I wear that has a leather strap, not a bracelet type watch. I wear this on job interviews and when I want to cover it up for some reason. Just another option if need to cover it

sunnydays99 · August 2014

I don't think it would be a problem. I used to work in a middle school (in the counselling department) and I have visible tattoos. It was never an issue. As a parent I wouldn't care either.

Make sure you post a pic once it's done! :-)

yeah. · August 2014

It would not phase me at all. I"m a teacher and most of the teachers at my school have tattoos.

MesmrEwe · August 2014

Just to follow up - the reason I said the year to research is because I have some kick butt awesome tattoo artist friends - some of their work was so awesome that even *I* would consider having them do something on me! (anyone who knows me IRL would say I'm the last person on this earth they'd expect to see walking through a tattoo shop door - I don't even have my ears pierced).. Having flat out asked them when there has been the discussion by people I know on the subject, one of the most important things they said was to put the time in to finding a GREAT artist because of too many pop-ups that use photoshopped images or just drawings and not "what did this drawing turn out like" and let their work speak for itself without editing. The time-frame is really arbitrary to the idea of doing proper due diligence because this is such a meaningful tattoo and not just a "hey let's go get a tattoo!" on spring break.. Plus, this is permanent, it has to be done right the first time.

My training partners also preached the doing your due diligence research on the artist because all but one had to go have "repair" work done - one had what was suppose to be a Grateful Dead tattoo come out looking like the "Two scoops" from Raisin Bran Cereal (it was "repaired" to look like a dream catcher, but still, you can see the "two scoops"..).

The exact quote from my tattoo friend (if you're down in IA/IL/WI border area PM for the name rec'), is this... "research portfolios, go to shops and ask questions and overall talk to people that are heavvily tattooed with quality work and see where they go to get work done"

lexusolsen · August 2014

@MesmrEwe‌ I understand what you are saying. I am not rushing out to get this done. I'm hoping to get it done in March to mark his "angelversary" as it's called in the loss community. I'm going to tape the drawing I posted here to my bathroom mirror. When I don't make adjustments I'll know that's really what I want and start finding someone.

My brother has a few tattoos and is getting another one soon. I was figuring I can start by talking to whoever he uses. I really appreciate the feedback. Thanks!

mrsrobinsontobe · August 2014

I am a hs teacher and there are tons of teachers with tattoos...even here in the conservative northeast, no big deal!

Here's what I would think about if I were you before you put it on your wrist -- I think that's where you said you wanted it, no?:

1. Although I love my "kids" to pieces, think about how rude/inappropriate teenagers can be sometimes. What if they say something mean about it? That will totally ruin your day.

2. What if someone asks you about it at a time that you are feeling particularly sad. It's an awful feeling when you want to cry in front of your students.

3. I don't like the idea of you ever having to cover it up...it's nothing to be ashamed of. I guess I'd put it somewhere more personal so that it's naturally just something you see.

I hope I'm not offending you -- at all. Just some things to think about. Hope you are doing ok!

lexusolsen · August 2014

mrsrobinsontobe said:
I am a hs teacher and there are tons of teachers with tattoos...even here in the conservative northeast, no big deal!

Here's what I would think about if I were you before you put it on your wrist -- I think that's where you said you wanted it, no?:

1. Although I love my "kids" to pieces, think about how rude/inappropriate teenagers can be sometimes. What if they say something mean about it? That will totally ruin your day.

2. What if someone asks you about it at a time that you are feeling particularly sad. It's an awful feeling when you want to cry in front of your students.

3. I don't like the idea of you ever having to cover it up...it's nothing to be ashamed of. I guess I'd put it somewhere more personal so that it's naturally just something you see.

I hope I'm not offending you -- at all. Just some things to think about. Hope you are doing ok!

@mrsrobinsontobe‌ I'm not offended but I appreciate your concern. Teenagers aren't they only ones who speak without thinking. Someone told me I'm lucky I have just one kid because it makes it easier to clean my house. What I would give to have baby crap all over my house right now...

My point is, people say the stupidest things. Sometimes it does ruin my day and other times I can move on easily. That's going to happen regardless of the tattoo. I will probably get another tattoo eventually, at the site of the impact. That's where his abruption occurred. But honestly, even though the massive bruise is gone my hip is still sore to the touch. That one won't happen for a while.

orangegoggles · August 2014

I work in elementary and a lot of teachers have tatoos. There is a big difference between a small memorable tatoo than a huge colorful "sleeve" tattoo. Most people wouldn't even notice or think twice about it.

I think its a great idea and I think it would be really special. If it is brought up by your class I would have an honest conversation about it (if you would be ok with it, you mentioned you liked talking about him,so I'm assuming).

Can't wait to see it!

raraavis28 · August 2014

lexusolsen said:

I am a hs teacher and there are tons of teachers with tattoos...even here in the conservative northeast, no big deal!

Here's what I would think about if I were you before you put it on your wrist -- I think that's where you said you wanted it, no?:

1. Although I love my "kids" to pieces, think about how rude/inappropriate teenagers can be sometimes. What if they say something mean about it? That will totally ruin your day.

2. What if someone asks you about it at a time that you are feeling particularly sad. It's an awful feeling when you want to cry in front of your students.

3. I don't like the idea of you ever having to cover it up...it's nothing to be ashamed of. I guess I'd put it somewhere more personal so that it's naturally just something you see.

I hope I'm not offending you -- at all. Just some things to think about. Hope you are doing ok!
@mrsrobinsontobe‌ I'm not offended but I appreciate your concern. Teenagers aren't they only ones who speak without thinking. Someone told me I'm lucky I have just one kid because it makes it easier to clean my house. What I would give to have baby crap all over my house right now... My point is, people say the stupidest things. Sometimes it does ruin my day and other times I can move on easily. That's going to happen regardless of the tattoo. I will probably get another tattoo eventually, at the site of the impact. That's where his abruption occurred. But honestly, even though the massive bruise is gone my hip is still sore to the touch. That one won't happen for a while.

This is very true. Actually, having taught many middle and high-school students, I found that, while some of them can obviously be jerks, most were quite sensitive with very caring hearts....more so than a lot of adults.

It's interesting to see all the responses that a tattoo would not be a big deal in a school environment....that would certainly not have been the case in the schools where I taught, but that appears to be the exception. So I say go for it, but definitely make sure there are coverage options if they are necessary for one reason or other.

Your story about the butterflies made me cry, btw....that is so sweet and heartbreaking.

I do hope that getting the tattoo will be something that brings you a little more peace and healing.

bumpuser924057 · August 2014

One of my very good friends in the English department had a wrist tattoo of a similar size, and it didn't even register with most people. She bought a couple of cool cuff bracelets that were wide enough to cover it, but those were for a visit to her grandma's house, not for work.

mrsrobinsontobe · August 2014

Oh, I absolutely think teenagers are delightful -- I've been working with this population for years and they are often more mature than adults I know, especially in tragic situations. I guess I was just speaking to the specific situation. Sometimes, kids aren't so mature. But you're right...sometimes adults are much worse!!

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