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January 2015 Moms
Gender gender gender
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Gender gender gender
@kmg06d : Playing the "are you even pregnant?" question is a snatch move. Way to show your true colors.
@AggieMom0809 you've not said one logical or intelligent thing so far on this board, so keep trolling, troll.
Eta to fix tags
<p align="center"1. i think the gender/sex thing has been beaten into the ground, so anyone who still wants to claim they "believe differently" and that WE'RE being intolerant can seriously GTFO now. i'm intolerant of your intolerance.
2. apologizing for someone being offended by something you said is not an apology. if you're not sorry for what you said, you're putting the responsibility for YOUR actions on the person you offended. nope nope nope.
3. i'm not even going to comment on aggiewhatever because, judging by the few run-ins i've had with her, i believe she's one of those unfortunate trolls who trolls honestly (i.e., yes she's doing it to piss people off but she also actually believes what she's saying), and no amount of flaming will ever change that. it's a large board so i highly doubt she'll ever be completely ignored, but i'm hoping that she'll get bored and move on at some point. i also feel sorry for her children. at best, she's raising more bigoted assholes. at worst...well, i won't go into that.
BFP#1 EDD 04.20.2010, SUNSHINE baby boy born 03.31.2010
BFP#2 EDD 12.07.2014, natural mc 04.09.2014 at 5w3d
BFP#3 EDD 01.14.15, RAINBOW baby girl born 01.16.2015
jan'15 january siggy challenge: baby fails
mm 2/17/11 * dd born 4/20/12 * bo 1/3/14 * edd 1/21/ 1/15
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This was to https://forums.thebump.com/profile/7307789/ICarriedAWatermelon comment on page one.
It seems to me that until you are told otherwise the gender that typically matches the anatomical sex is almost always assigned. Of course how tightly parents stick to traditional gender norms/roles varies. There are only a few rare cases I can think of where parents did not reveal the sex. I am not aware of any parents assigning the opposite gender. So while we are are identifying the anatomical sex a gender is being assigned (and perhaps revealed). To me the semantics don't seem particularly important because I don't think it necessarily brings awareness to transgender issues (which I do think are important). I suppose some will disagree with me there. I just have never been under the impression that people who use gender incorrectly are unaware of what it means to be transgendered. Perhaps I am mistaken about that though.
Dec '12 & Jan '15
WillCMyInk was here...
So I know I'm a mod who has to uphold the rules and if I get reported, another mod is free to chastise me, but I can't let this one go. (I also don't go here. OH NO!)
Ncc!!! Come post on this board more please!!!
"As long as I live you will live. As long as I live you will be loved."
BFP#1 3/31/12 EDD 12/1/12,No HB 6/6/12 (14 weeks 4 days), D&C 6/11/12 (15 weeks 2 days)*Arabella Ann*
BFP#2 5/21/14 EDD 1/27/15 *GROW BABY GROW*
mm 2/17/11 * dd born 4/20/12 * bo 1/3/14 * edd 1/21/ 1/15
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The only reason I say it might be an issue with Boston qualifying is because there are different qualifying times for males/females. But it could also be something that the BAA deals with more frequently and has a solution for on its own.
I think that the framework that is set up in society is more of a view that gender as binary- male/female and after the anatomical sex is determined gender is assigned in this framework. We have boys and girls dressed in gender specific to gender neutral clothing. We pick appropriate hairstyles so that gender and anatomical sex match. This is despite the fact that our children have not yet told us (or developed I suppose) a gender identity. Since not all individuals have a gender identity that matches their anatomical sex don't we all take a guess and assign a gender in this binary framework? This isn't limited to parents of intersex children. Of course there have been a few people in the news that are exceptions and do not raise their children with any gender (keeping their anatomical sex a secret).
IMO using the term "gender" correctly does not do anything to change the notion of the binary view of gender. It may demonstrate that the person understands that sex and gender so not always match, but it doesn't convey a fluidity of gender as you describe.
We will have to agree to disagree, but when the term "gender" is used interchangeably with "sex" I don't think it can be assumed that a person doesn't understand that sex and gender don't always match. So if a person uses the terms sex and gender interchangeably (and FWIW I don't), but does understand the difference, how does that impact how they treat children who don't fit into typical gender norms?
I have always considered what you are calling "gender expression" as something fluid and more variable, but also something separate from gender identity. I am not familiar with gender identity as being as fluid as you describe, but that is interesting.
Dec '12 & Jan '15
FWIW I don't find tomboy or metrosexual to be negative terms. Tomboys in particular don't seem to be talked about negatively IME.
I do think it is important to understand the concepts of gender and sex. I feel like most people are aware that sex and gender identity do not always match. Perhaps they don't know how common it is. I do wonder if people who don't seem to know the difference between the terms simply don't have a term for for the concept of gender identity.
More importantly though I think it is important not to stigmatize characteristics that are outside the norm (in general).
Dec '12 & Jan '15
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