Second IUI didn't work-need advice

Rebeckbec · July 2014

So today we went in for blood work and it was negative. I had a feeling it was because I hadn't felt any different or had any pregnancy symptoms. So I guess I'm wondering what to do next. Should we change the sperm donor? We used the same one both times. Should we change the cryobank? Should I change my diet? Take different vitamins to help? Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!

CageyMack · July 2014

Hi! I'm sorry that it didn't take. It's a hard slap for sure. We are just off a roller-coaster to get pregnant and we had month after month of negative IUI. It is awful.

Regarding your questions, I don't see a signature, so I can't see what your protocol was.

Here are my suggestions, based upon knowing nothing:

1. Go to an RE. These are much better than OBs.

2. Do the diagnostic tests they suggest, HSG, saline hysterosonogram, etc.

What were the counts on your sperm? What meds where you on? I have a stupid-lucky utereus and got pregnant on my 1st IUI, but that is rare. However, if you are not getting excellent care, your IUIs are wasted, for example, if you have blocked tubes (which an HSG would find). How many follicles were you releasing? If it isn't monitored and triggered, you are reducing your chances a lot.

Good luck!

ATXmommas · July 2014

I'm mobile bumping, so I too can't see a siggy if you have one.

I agree with everything @CageyMack‌ said. I'll also add that there's only a 20% chance that an IUI will be successful. So, even if it was a perfect cycle with perfect timing, it may not work and it doesn't mean you need to change a thing.

My RE's threshold for changing things up was 3 IUIs. And not necessarily because anything was truly "wrong," but because she recognized the emotional and financial toll repeated failed cycles take on a person/couple.

Personally, I think it's too early to think about switching donors if the numbers are good and your donor has reported pregnancies. But, I say that with the mind frame that I was attached to our donor and it would have been difficult for me to think about switching. So if you aren't attached and it would make you feel better, no harm there either.

If you think you need to do something proactive to feel better at your chances, many people (myself included) have found acupuncture to be helpful (my two pregnancies both resulted from cycles in which I had acupuncture).

I hope you figure out a plan you feel good about and have your BFP very soon!

valeriegp · July 2014

I agree that it is too early to to switch donors, unless your donor has a low sperm count. Even a straight couple having well-timed sex shouldn't expect to be pregnant after two months of trying. Honestly, two IUIs with a BFN is not failure or even a reason to worry. I know that's easier said than done, but I've been there. It took 6 IUIs for me to get pregnant. #6 was going to be our last attempt before we regrouped and decided what to do next.

And I agree that if you aren't seeing an RE, I would highly recommend that. They can do some tests and advise you in a way that a regular OB is probably not going to do. My OB recommended an RE and we were very happy with her.

ball.and.chain · July 2014

ATXmommas said:

II'll also add that there's only a 20% chance that an IUI will be successful. So, even if it was a perfect cycle with perfect timing, it may not work and it doesn't mean you need to change a thing.

This. Just keep trying!

KatCraig30 · July 2014

I'm definitely not an expert, but I would just keep at it, and you have the support of your bumpie family

. I got very very lucky. I was fully expecting to go a few more rounds of IUIs and I still would if I didn't get a BFP my first time around.

Karlamo · July 2014

I would do as pp mentioned.
I remember getting lost in the
"what if's " when we were doing iui's.
What if we switch donors, what if we do an herbal cleanse, what if you stand on your head the 3rd Tuesday of the month. It's exhausting trying to get the timing right. I've come to believe it's a little of science, little of timing and lots of luck! I hope yours is short and successful.

Rebeckbec · July 2014

Well, first of all I want to say thank you for all of the responses! I am not 100% sure on how to make a signature so that is something I will have to work on!

I have been going to a fertility center... I didn't even talk to an ob about it because at the time I didn't have one. When I initially started last Aug. I found out I had PCOS so they put me on metformin and then I did the hysterosonogram and everything came back fine. I was supposed to go back last Dec. after being on metformin for 4 months and then with the holidays and other "life" things I got lazy and never made the call to schedule an appointment. So then in April we started getting more serious. We had the 1st IUI on May 31st and then the second July 9th.

I've been on metformin, prental vit, coq10, omega3 and then femara to get my follicles to grow, dexamethasone and baby aspirin. I've definitely gone through all of the monitoring.... driving 45 min there and then 45 min to work every other day is not fun!

I would definitely like to stick with the same donor. He had good numbers and it took forever for my wife and I to agree on one! So hopefully I get my period and we can get the ball rolling again.

Thank you again for all of the responses. It is so helpful!

Oh, as far as acupuncture goes did you do it just when you did the IUI or during monitoring?

Rebeckbec · July 2014

Tried to do a signature, not sure if it will work.

StacyLH24 · July 2014

I know how frustrating it is to get BFNs. It was never easy, no matter what number try it was. As PPs have said, after 2, I wouldn't change a whole lot. My RE had us give it 3 tries before we did anything differently. We did change donors, but we really probably didn't need to in terms of whether or not that had anything to do with me not getting pregnant. I only picked donors who had proven pregnancies, so I already knew the sperm could do the job.

Though we beat ourselves up over the "what ifs" in terms of whether or not we did "enough" to help the process, here is how I think about it... Women in third world countries who walk miles for clean water, who don't eat nutritiously (due to lack of nutritious foods) and who live under extreme stress conditions can and do get pregnant and deliver babies. Women who are full of drugs can and do get pregnant and deliver babies. I hated hearing this, but it is true that it can take a year for a healthy straight couple to get pregnant. That same rule applies to us, even if the sperm get a little help getting where they need to go.

ATXmommas · July 2014

As far as acupuncture, I went about once a week during my cycle, but the most important is to have it right before or right after your IUI.

Rebeckbec · July 2014

Stacy-You really put it into perspective for me! I think I needed to hear a lot of what you said!

I may definitely look into acupuncture this time.... I will try just about anything within reason :-)

channe9 · July 2014

@Rebeckbec I'm (kinda) in your boat too. Wife and I have tried three times at home with frozen donor sperm -- all BFN. For what it's worth, we are swapping donors now but that's because our donor does NOT have a pregnancy yet. In the beginning that didn't seem like a big deal but eight months later (and the donors "stock" has fluctuated so I know other people have been trying too...) it seems REALLY important.

I started acupuncture in June and it has done wonders for extending and regulating my cycle AND general stress relief/relaxation during this stressful process. So while I'm NOT pregnant (yet), I can highly recommend acupuncture. I go once a week but we're thinking of adjusting that depending on what we decide our next steps will be. We're off to investigate a clinic this afternoon....

1blueridgemama · July 2014

Best thing we ever did in that department was leave our regular OB and go to a reproductive medicine clinic. Our OB botched more than one IUI (thawed then waited more than an hour to come back on one occasion and other such bad mistakes). We were so upset by the process- both financially and emotionally since nothing was covered so between sperm and delivery and procedures each attempt was well over 1k. We finally made appointment at IVF clinic. First time worked, 27 weeks pregnant with twins now. Only regret was waiting the 5 months. We spent about as much on IUI attempts than we did on one IVF. All cash out of pocket. Just our experiences...

Rebeckbec · July 2014

I feel so much more relief hearing everyone's stories! I was so optimistic the first time and then the second I don't think I was really "feeling it" so much. I already feel like this is going to be the cycle that works. Third times the charm! Now I just have to get my period! I know last time after I stopped the crinone I had it within 3 days so maybe tomorrow and then I can go to the dr on Monday fingers crossed!

Want a personalized experience?

Second IUI didn't work-need advice

Re: Second IUI didn't work-need advice

Choose Another Board

Search Boards