PPD check in

curlylocks3 · July 2014

I thought I was coping better with the bizarre freakouts, but no. A giant wasp got in our place yesterday and a 25 minute freakout about the babies getting stung and anaphylactic reactions commenced. I had to interrupt feeding Mumble to deal with it and her total volume was off for the rest of the day (likely because of said interruption) and I've been beating myself up about that.

elsa1688 · July 2014

I am pretty lonely too. It's DF busy season at work (like realllly busy) so baby and I are on our own a lot. I try and get out but it's hard. I'm always the youngest mom and I feel so awkward. (I'm almost 25 but all the moms in my area are mid to late 30s it feels like). It's hard.

CJnKR2014 · July 2014

Laugh ladies, laugh!

https://youtu.be/AJzds6fRfjM

Mom&nurse · July 2014

Finally going to go talk to someone on Monday. My Dr thinks I may have PTSD.

I just want to be able to go to work workout feeling like I'm going to die.

sjn00 · July 2014

Thank you everyone! I would PM you but the site was down last night. Ill have to check when I am able to put this LO down (im mobile and they need to add PM to this dang app!!)

Overall.. My great aunt who was on her death bed in Feb passed away Wed night.. And I just found out my one and only friend (best friend at that) is moving to a different state at the end of this month. Too many goodbyes and a new baby I am working around the clock with is hard. Husband is sleeping and working and there really is no one else to talk to.. It sucks.

I am so sorry so many of us are dealing with loneliness issues =[ =[

CJnKR2014 · July 2014

On the app to get to the PM, you click "forums" and the bottom option is "go to my inbox"

lest12 · July 2014

It's really hard to not feel lonely when so much of our day is spent with our LO's... I love him but he's not so big on the conversation, you know? It can be isolating... when DH goes to work, I want to cry sometimes. I had to cancel grown up plans yesterday because i just couldnt juggle him and get there on time and be able to enjoy myself. It sucked.

I'm trying to remember that it won't always be like this.

curlylocks3 · July 2014

@lest12‌ I know he can't talk back but have you tried talking to him like he's an adult? While pregnant I kept reading that I should be talking to them but I never knew what to say so I got in the habit of telling them about my day and what was planned or what we were having for dinner.
Now I make sure I read children's books at least once a day but I read other stuff to them too. So far this week we (ok I) read them an article on a penguin census in Antarctica and a bunch of stuff about volcanoes and lakes and such. I just find stuff that interests me and I read it out loud so that a) they hear my voice and b) I feel like I'm talking about grown up stuff.

tbmadeamistake · July 2014

@KrystaJ, if your LO is fed, clothed, and happy, you are an awesome mom!! Tell the doubters I said to stfu.

steprozz · July 2014

elsa1688 said:
I am pretty lonely too. It's DF busy season at work (like realllly busy) so baby and I are on our own a lot. I try and get out but it's hard. I'm always the youngest mom and I feel so awkward. (I'm almost 25 but all the moms in my area are mid to late 30s it feels like). It's hard.

that is exactly how I feel about trying to meet moms in my area. I just turned 26 with two kids and it seems like everyone else is in their 30s and look at me like I should be filming Teen Mom or something. it makes me too uncomfortable to try and talk to any of them.

lest12 · July 2014

No, but I will try it, @curlylocks3‌! It sounds beneficial for my sanity.

@KrystaJ‌ - not that I know you per se, but the way you care about your dd comes across, even on the internet. There's no way you are a bad mom.

Fwiw, all of my older family members try to tell me what I'm doing wrong all the time. So helpful!

katekat8721 · July 2014

My twin mom friend has PPA/OCD. We scheduled a play date for us next week. It's going to be a pony tail and sweat pants play date and we're excited lol. It's such a pain to get out of the house, especially since the car seat makes the girls freak out, but I'm trying.

AbbySeiden · July 2014

The loneliness thing isn't just about distance it's part of the stress and overwhelming nature of it all. My parent live close and so do my in laws and friends, I see people almost everyday and the very beginning still felt really lonely, as if no one, not even my husband understood what I was feeling. However in the last two weeks it's gotten so much better. Work on letting go, understanding that you can only manage things as they occur and not control them or try to anticipate them before they have them. Also as overwhelming as it may seem/feel go out! The worst thing that will happen is they will cry but on the upside they might enjoy the outing and so will you.

Mom&nurse · July 2014

I HAVE HAD IT! ! I LEFT!!

Well not for good but I took my keys wallet phone and just left. I've had it. I felt bad leaving LO but she was sound asleep.

I am tired of being the only one doing shit. Literally dinner got cleaned up before I ate cuz I had to get everything for everyone and tend to LO. I swear my SO doesn't sooth LO on purpose.

I'm a new mom plus have 4 step daughters. Living in my dad's basement cuz he had not moved out yet. With my step mom and my 6 year old spoiled rotten rude snotty sister.

I can't do it. I ask for help and he half as a helps and I end up doing it anyways so why ask.

I left 1 he ago and no word from him at all. Said nothing to me as I left either.

tbmadeamistake · July 2014

@mom&nurse, I'm so sorry. I hope he Gera it soon and you get a phone call or text from him!

tbmadeamistake · July 2014

I did really well yesterday and today. Felt like my old self, was able to handle crying babies and tantruming toddlers. Great. I knew it didn't mean I was magically better, but it was great to feel normal again. Woke up for this motn and I am irrationally angry about everything. I don't want to be awake, and it is Charlie and dh's faults that I am. Guess I'm still not doing so hot. Blerg.

katekat8721 · July 2014

I feel irrationally angry towards my family sometimes. I will spend the day with two girls who are either 1) crying or 2) sleeping. I'll take us over to my moms for a change in scenery and to go visit. My mom and grandma are there and get to hold and cuddle them and what do you know? The girls are happy and content and not crying because they're each ebing held, which is all they want and is so hard for me to give them when there's just one of me!

When the girls are the most happy, I don't even get to hold and love on them because my family wants to hold and pass them around. I have to ask for them and then they start crying.

So while I sit there twiddling my thumbs, mom and grandma have happy babies cooing at them. The other day my grandma said "Oh look, she's smiling at me!" It took everything in me not to cry. I haven't gotten ONE smile yet. It just makes me so mad and sad.

curlylocks3 · July 2014

@katekat8721‌ ygpm fyi

steprozz · July 2014

@katekat8721‌ ((hugs)) B gave his first smiles to my mom as well and I was crushed. he would only smile at her for a week and a half before I finally got a half assed smile and I'm still not convinced he wasn't farting. I hope you get some smiles soon!

BMaidPlanner · July 2014

LO is on my boob every hour for 45 minutes plus. I don't know if it's a growth spurt because she is 5 weeks 4 days and had one at 4 weeks, not 3. I cried. A lot. She is crying now for more boob. DH is trying to soothe her but it's not working. Anxiety through the roof. My 6 week post partum check up is Friday. Birthday is Wednesday. Don't really even care much.

katekat8721 · July 2014

Thank you guys! I'm usually not a huge venter but it feels good to get it off my chest. So grateful for our board!

CJnKR2014 · July 2014

Creepy internet hugs for you, @katekat8721‌

I've slept 1 hour in the last 48. DH has Kellan for right now, feeding him and trying to get him to sleep. I'm trying to go to bed but I just heard Connor start fussing, which means I'm going to have to get right back up in about 20 minutes because DH can't deal with both by himself.

This is bullshit.

rainbowdashh · July 2014

@katekat8721‌ you're doing a great job! Those girls are definitely lucky to have you. I can't even imagine how hard twins must be. Double the babies and double the mom frustration/guilt/etc.

I have mostly good days and then suddenly it's like the world has coming crashing down. W isn't the best sleeper. I'm lucky to get two consecutive hours at night. Everything going on with my family. I feel like H and are together but not if that makes sense. Nothing is wrong, we aren't fighting, there's just this distance that wasn't there before. I miss him.

sjn00 · July 2014

I have a funeral to go to on Tuesday... Im just praying that on top of my fatigue and being upset about losing a loved one... My husband steps it up with the LO when she cries.

tbmadeamistake · July 2014

I have a therapy appointment tomorrow night. DH will come and watch the toddler while I take Charlie with me and keep him in a sling. I'm both relieved and nervous. How are you ladies doing today? Mondays are hard.

curlylocks3 · July 2014

@Lilygrace48‌ I hope the appointment goes well! I already had a relationship with my therapist prior to delivery (she's actually the one who did te diagnosis) but I have found working with her to be very helpful. I have not brought the babies with me to appointments but might have to this week.
Mondays are hard here too- it's one of H's super late nights (he will get home at 10:30 tonight) plus we got all off schedule with the babies boycotting sleep this weekend, so he wasn't able to do the morning feed before work. Add in that I got my first postpartum period (finally!) so physically I feel pretty crummy. I'm just planning a super lazy day- I'm still in pjs and curled up with a heating pad. Was going to try to go out but too hot/
humid so low key it is.

elsa1688 · July 2014

Lilygrace48 said:
I have a therapy appointment tomorrow night. DH will come and watch the toddler while I take Charlie with me and keep him in a sling. I'm both relieved and nervous. How are you ladies doing today? Mondays are hard.

We are in couples counseling (have been since November). We take j now in a sling or car seat and he usually just sleeps. I hope it goes well

Mom&nurse · July 2014

Had my appointment today. Went well. They won't sign me medically ok to go back. I'll find out tomorrow what that means for my job. I figured that if they do try to fire me I can always sue the hospital for the trauma. Not that I would. I just hope my job isn't affected.

tbmadeamistake · July 2014

Mom&nurse said:
Had my appointment today. Went well. They won't sign me medically ok to go back. I'll find out tomorrow what that means for my job. I figured that if they do try to fire me I can always sue the hospital for the trauma. Not that I would. I just hope my job isn't affected.

Glad you had an appointment, hoping it doesn't mean your job!

katekat8721 · July 2014

Mom&nurse said:
Had my appointment today. Went well. They won't sign me medically ok to go back. I'll find out tomorrow what that means for my job. I figured that if they do try to fire me I can always sue the hospital for the trauma. Not that I would. I just hope my job isn't affected.

You should be ok. It'll be disability and you'll be covered under short term disability (unless you burned that up, but then it'll be long term disability so either way it's ok). The only thing would be if you used up all your FMLA. If you did, they technically don't have to hold your job. But they would be major dicks and would be risking a lawsuit (discrimination) by firing someone on disability. Worst case you do get fired, get on unemployment then get an attorney and sue your employer. Chances are you won't get anything from the hospital.

steprozz · July 2014

I got fired while on STD after having DS and because there was no FMLA protection my lawyer said I had no case and it was legal for them to not hold my job. although it may have been because I was told I could reapply when I was cleared for work, I'm not sure (I am not a lawyer so take that fwiw as my personal experience) but I was able to get unemployment. I sincerely hope you don't have to go that path and your employer is understanding of your situation. did you give birth at the hospital you work at? I feel like they should be even more sympathetic if that was the case.

jsnyder79 · July 2014

With all the other health issues I have had and my children have had, my PPA has been on the down low for awhile. I'm hoping that means it is going away. I have my 6 week on 8/4. I know I have to take the assessment then. Why did I think everything was going to be roses and rainbows when I was pregnant. I feel the biggest letdown. Almost like it happened too quick and I was caught off guard and it wasn't perfect like I was trying to plan. Sounds kinda silly I guess, but how I feel. I still don't feel like I have my groove back. Things feel weird and off. Maybe it's the change. One day at a time.

Mom&nurse · July 2014

I did give birth at the same hospital that I work at.

JulieSmiles · July 2014

Can anger/ irritability be a symptom of ppd? I've noticed that I'm getting really frustrated over small things. I feel like I'm losing my cool over things that aren't really a big deal. Like tonight after nursing Dad, she puked all over, repeatedly. We went through 3 burl clothes full of pule from one feeding. I could tell I was getting more and more angry every time she puked. I wasn't mad at her, just frustrated with dealing with her spitting up nonstop. Every piece of clothing I had on was covered in puke, her clothes were covered, plus the three burp clothes. We go through this pukefest after multiple feedings a day. It's making me so angry that we are dealing with this. I know it's a stupid thing to be upset about, but I am. I don't know if its ppd malign me so angry, exhaustion, a combo, or just normal feelings. I feel like my husband thinks I'm horrible and not able to care for DD because I'm getting so frustrated. I would never do anything to hurt her. I just want the puling to stop so she feels.better and I'm less frustrated. Anyone have magical tips on how to keep milk in her and not on me? Is anyone else dealing with anger?)

tbmadeamistake · July 2014

@JulieSmiles‌ yes, anger can very much be a symptom! I have the frustration part, and occasionally the anger. Its really hard to find that I am angry with my infant.

BMaidPlanner · July 2014

nelleebelle said:
@JulieSmiles‌ I have the anger/frustration with DD1. I see it right now with DD2 as well. I get frustrated or irrationally angry. Blah. My favorite is when I try to reason with the baby, really self? Yeah.

Same here.

tbmadeamistake · July 2014

So glad I started therapy this week. Last night I hit DH in anger. Not hard, only on the leg, and he said it was no big deal, but it is to me. A, should not be hitting my husband. B, should not be lashing out I'm anger. C, what if I get that angry at the kids one day? Totally not OK. Lots of crying. It was also during yet another argument about nursing vs. Ff. He kept saying it wasn't my fault, dismissing how I feel completely. O might not be doing it on purpose, but it is my body that can't figure shit out and is drowning our child. Hence,y fault. Ugh. Bad afternoon with the kids and then bad night with DH. I can't wait to feel better.

kks4471 · July 2014

krystalann94 said:

@nelleebelle‌ thank you :-( I had my six week check up and mentioned it to the doctor then. I was already well aware of it becoming a problem and starting to try things to help (exercise, time out of the house, etc..) he said that was enough. Needless to say - going to see another doctor! I am sad that my memories of his first few weeks will be the way they have been.

I completely agree with that statement. My memories of LO's newborn stage is screaming colic tantrums and how miserable we were while trying to deal with it. Things are finally better though, I haven't cried since Tuesday. We switched to formula, and even though I'm upset about not BF, DS is doing better and that's what counts. I know all of you will get through this hard time, just need to figure out what works best for you and your family. It takes trial and error though, took me 8 weeks to stop his screaming.

katekat8721 · July 2014

Lilygrace48 said:
So glad I started therapy this week. Last night I hit DH in anger. Not hard, only on the leg, and he said it was no big deal, but it is to me. A, should not be hitting my husband. B, should not be lashing out I'm anger. C, what if I get that angry at the kids one day? Totally not OK. Lots of crying. It was also during yet another argument about nursing vs. Ff. He kept saying it wasn't my fault, dismissing how I feel completely. O might not be doing it on purpose, but it is my body that can't figure shit out and is drowning our child. Hence,y fault. Ugh. Bad afternoon with the kids and then bad night with DH. I can't wait to feel better.

I say this with love...

Switch to damn formula already.

It's ok. I promise, it's ok.

(((Hugs)))

elsa1688 · July 2014

I don't think I have full on PPD but I feel like all I do is feed LO and get frustrated at DF. It's stupid because when we are apart I'm not mad, but when he comes home I just unload on him and it feels like it comes outta nowhere. I absolutely hate it and I want to stop but it feels hard to stop something you aren't doing intentionally.

Want a personalized experience?

PPD check in

Re: PPD check in

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

Married DH 7/30/11

CSC arrived 5/7/12

CHC arrived 6/2/14

Choose Another Board

Search Boards