Been awhile, just talking!

TwinkleTor · July 2014

So my husband and I had our big extravagant wedding 4 days ago and I've been thinking so much about "did I make people feel uncomfortable?" by taking a moment of silence to honor my son, and dancing to his song. My husband and I felt that had he been alive he would have been present for our wedding and despite him passing, we wanted to make him present at the wedding.

No one had said anything negative, but no one has really talked about that part of the wedding either. There are also no pictures of that moment. Should we have just ignored our son for that one day to not ruin the party? Or should we feel like that was our day, and our moment and people have to get over it?

I just wanted Domenik to know that no matter what mommy and daddy are thinking about him always. And we want our families to understand that he made a huge impact on our lives, and he is very loved and very missed.

mumel16 · July 2014

I think you did what was right for you and your husband then you did the right thing. People just never know what to say about anything regarding a loss, they're probably just not mentioning it because they're afraid to say the wrong thing.

If it were me, I would have included my son in some way, and I think dancing to his song was a beautiful idea.

AshersMom11 · July 2014

I think it's great that you included your son in your special day. As long as you were happy, then I wouldn't worry about anyone else. I agree with mumel16, I think when people aren't sure what to say they usually don't say anything.

VyD81 · July 2014

*siggy warning*

Congratulations on your nuptial. It was your day so to me it doesn't really matter what people think and I think it's wonderful that you included Domenik on your special day. I think people don't want to upset you in anyway so they chose not to say anything instead.

ikrystal · July 2014

I think that is a beautiful thing that you did in honor of your baby. I would have done the same thing. I find that people are uncomfortable saying anything because they think it is such a sore subject and they don't want to be the reason we start crying. But there is a quote I heard awhile back that I think of often:

The sound of my baby's name my bring tears to my eyes, but it is music to my ears.

I hope that soon, people will be more comfortable talking about your little one to you.

And of course, congratulations on your wedding

stefuge · July 2014

Congratulations on your wedding! I agree with the other ladies - I think it's lovely that you included Domenik and of course you should! Who cares what people think? That tends to be my motto these day, and if they're uncomfortable, too bad. That day was about you and YH, and that moment was about your family. Congratulations again.

lexusolsen · July 2014

Congrats! I also think it was good for you to include ds. I have started to tell people not to hold back. I am always thinking of Ben so feel free to bring him up!

shandorfml2 · July 2014

Congrats! I think its wonderful you included Domenik

angelsnight · July 2014

Ticker warning, rainbow mentioned

I know it is hard to not worry what others think, but we really need to do what we need to do. Weddings are a happy event, congrats to you both, but they are a part of a life that includes sad moments as well and your son existed and is loved and he deserves a place on your happy day, whether it makes other people uncomfortable or not. My mom passed away 6 years before I got married, so I did a few things here and there to honor her at my wedding. I tried to keep them to a minimum as to not turn it into a super sad day, but she was and will always be loved and missed and I just could not go the whole day and not acknowledge her. It may have made a few people tear up (especially when my dad mentioned in his toast that it was very sweet of MH and I to choose to get married on what was my parents wedding anniversary) but that's life, both happy and sad.

It doesn't sound like you went overboard with honoring your son, what you did was very beautiful so anyone who didn't like it can just get over it. I've noticed on FB when I post something about my rainbow I get a ton of likes and comments, but when I post something about my angel only my very very close family or friends like it but it will not keep me from acknowledging my first daughter.

jonahsma · July 2014

Congrats on the wedding! I'm sure it was even more beautiful since you included Domenik . Don't worry if you offended anyone or if anyone felt weird about it. It was your day and you both created him he deserves to be included. I think it was a great idea!

Been awhile, just talking!

Re: Been awhile, just talking!

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